A Life Like Mine (19 page)

              “Horrible what?” Hank tried to hide another smile.

              “Thing!” I said triumphantly, until I realized how lame that was. Thing? Come on now, Ashley! Why don’t you just write the words loser on your forehead? Jeez, I’m such a loser.

              “Adam’s not in too good of shape. If he doesn’t tell them where the money is, they’re going to give him a really heavy sentence.” Hank said, pretending he didn’t hear my “thing” comment. “There’s only one thing that can save him from it, and that’s getting the money back. If the money was returned, then he could just get off with doing community service,” Hank informed me.

“So what is he going to do?” I asked.

“That’s kind of the problem.”

“I know that.”

“Well, then why are you asking?” Hank was being difficult.

              “I don’t know! You’re frustrating me!”

              “Sorry. Go ahead and ask your questions.”

“What kind of sentence is he going to get if he doesn’t get the money?”

              “I don’t know. Adam wouldn’t tell me. That’s all that I know.” Hank was trying to tell me to back off now, but come on. Me? Back off? I don’t think so! That’s like asking guys to not want sex. Not going to happen!

              “So you’re telling me that if he returns all of the money, he’ll get off really easy?” I asked.

              “That’s what I’m telling you,” Hank agreed.

              “That doesn’t sound too hard,” I said.

              “Well, all you have to do is rip-off some cash in order to get enough money to cover that heavy debt and…oh wait! He’s already done that,” Hank retorted sarcastically.

              “Jeepers! You don’t have to be so mean!” I started to whimper.

              “Jeepers? Come on, you can use stronger words if you want to.” Hank looked at me.

              “You know you don’t have to say stuff that’s already been overly used by people on TV. It just makes you sound stupid.” I combed my hand through my hair. “What?” I caught Hank with a look of stress on his face. I’d never seen him look so upset before.

              “What?” He asked as if he hadn’t heard me the first time.

              “What are you thinking about? You look upset,” I asked indignantly.

              “You wouldn’t understand.” He answered flatly, smiling with a grin similar to Adam’s.

              “Is that all of the response I’m going to get from you?”

              “Yup.” He kept looking at me.

              “Stop looking so weird!” I tore my eyes away from his.

              “Why?”

              “It weirds me out.” I answered.

              “Weirds you out? Yet another phrase that you’ve invented no doubt.”

“You bet!” I smiled, as he licked his bottom lip. Wait. Did I just say that? Why is he licking his lips? Should I be worried! Oh my gosh. What if he’s some sort of cannibal or something? What if he’s thinking of me as his next feast? I would be quite a feast, because he could make a big rump roast out of me, if you know what I mean. What if Hank is actually Hannibal? He could be Hannibal Lector! Any minute now he’s going to look at me and say, “Hello, Ashley.” Just like in the movie! I’m too young to die. Please give me a second chance at life. WHY! WHY! Oh the horror!

              “Ashley? Are you okay? You’re looking at me funny.” Hank drew me back into real life.

              “I’m fine, but are you going to tell me what’s bothering you?” I asked.

              “If I did you’d laugh. Let’s walk down to the port,” Hank said. The port was a little bit of land that was sort of its own peninsula. It had enough room for ten people or so. Most of the time people would sit by the water and let their feet get wet. They’d take off their shoes and socks off their feet, and then splash them water. Today was especially nice for it because the tide was perfect.

              “Sure let’s go over to the port. Why won’t you tell me? I promise not to laugh. Come on. I bet you I’ve heard stupider things.” I tried to convince him.

              “I can’t. It’ll make me sound really old.”

              “Old? I already know you’re old! You’re older than me. I mean you are almost done with college aren’t you?” I sat down on the ground.

“Yep, just a little bit longer. As soon as Adam is finished with his case, I’m moving across the country,” He told me.

“Across the country? Why? We’ll miss you too much.”

“Thanks, but I’ve got a job offer. It sounds like a real break for me.”

“I still don’t want you to go, I know Adam wouldn’t want you to go,” I told him.

“Yeah, the only reason I’m still here is because of my finals and Adam’s living with me. Once the case is over and he moves out, I’m gone.”

“Does Adam have something to do with what’s bothering you?” I wanted to know.

“I’m thinking about adopting him,” He said suddenly as he looked out at the water.

“What are you talking about?” My mouth went dry, “Do not try to tell me that you’re going to adopt him. There’s no way! You’re not that old. This cannot be happening. This doesn’t make any sense.”

“Why doesn’t that make any sense? What’s so bad about it?”

“You can’t. That’s not the way that these things work. Are you going to make him move there and live with you? I mean, there’s more to this than you think.” I complained.

“What? Am I really that bad of a guy that it’s horrible for me to want to make Adam my kid brother? It’s not like I would be his father,” Hank asked.

“No. It’s just…I don’t think that you could handle it. I mean his parents aren’t around anymore, and…” I said.

“Why? I’m old enough. I’ve got a good job coming. I’m older than you are. It would be like Adam was my little brother. I never had a little brother. He and I are really close, I don’t think he’d mind.” Hank had obviously thought the whole thing through.

“I don’t think he would,” I informed him.

“How would you know? You haven’t even talked to him. He’s just some guy that you fawn over. “What do you know? Adam cares about me. You don’t know anything.” I crossed my arms.

“I know a lot more than you do. Why do you have to freak out about everything?” He looked at me.

“I don’t freak out about everything.”

“Yes, you do. You get all riled up about the stupidest things.”

“You don’t know me! Just because you and Adam have been friends for a really long time…” I couldn’t think up anything to say.

“Just stop. You’re acting really stupid. There’s stuff about Adam and me that you just don’t know,” Hank said. He and I sat there quiet for a few minutes. I didn’t know what to say. And is it just me or is this totally stupid? Hank doesn’t know anything about Adam. I don’t know anything about him either. It’s all so confusing. Why am I so upset anyway? It’s not like it’s my choice. It’s up to Adam. And Hank was a nice guy. He was more than nice. He was the big brother I never got.

“Hank, I…” I looked over at him and was going to apologize for the way that I had been acting. After all, I think he was right. I have overreacted to things that don’t matter.

              “Let’s go back, Adam said that he might be able to meet us.” He stood up and brushed the sand off of his pants.

              “Adam’s going to be here?” I asked with excitement.

              “I think so,” Hank told me.

              “How long have you known that?”

              “Since I got here.”

              “Why didn’t you tell me?” I was angry, and rightfully so! Why didn’t he tell me that the guy that I really like was going to be here? Oh man! Hank so has me pegged. Look at me. I’m already getting upset. Darn!

              “Come on, he might be here.” Hank grabbed my hand and dragged me behind him. As soon as he thought that I was okay at walking quickly on my own, he let go, but I wasn’t ready for it, and I fell backwards into something very soft and mushy. Uh oh. That can’t be good. Please be mud! Please be mud! Rats. I guess the means that Adam might not want to hug me. Nice, because of Hank, I now have a doggy corn-on-the-cob squashed all over the back of my bright yellow T-shirt.

              “Jeez! I’m so sorry! Let me help you up,” Hank pulled me up towards him.

              “Why did you let go of me like that? If you really wanted this to happen to me it would have been better if you catapulted me over a mountain instead. How am I supposed to greet Adam like this?”

              “You’re overreacting again,” Hank scolded me in an adult voice. Why did he have to act like there was such an age difference between us all of a sudden?

              “Am I supposed to just go up to Adam and say ‘Hi, I’m covered in dog pellets,’ and smile?” I kept complaining, “It’s a good thing that I have another shirt underneath this!”

              “How many layers do you have on?” Hank squinted his eyes.

              “I have this yellow shirt and then I have a tank top underneath it.” I took off my now stained yellow t-shirt and threw it at him, “You better get this cleaned.”

              “I promise, I will.” Hank laughed. He kept looking at me like he wanted to say something, but he didn’t know how. It was probably about him adopting Adam. I really didn’t want to talk about it anymore, so I was glad that he couldn’t put what he was thinking into words. It was really unnerving me.

              “Hey, you guys!” Adam sauntered up with a sheepish grin on his face.

              “Adam!” I screeched back. After realizing how totally pathetic I sounded, I decided to say something that sounded more under control, more sophisticated. I said calmly, “How are you?”

              “Great.” He stopped speaking and gave me one of those looks that just made me feel like I was the only girl in the world that he thought about.  Adam kept looking at me then he took off his coat, threw it to the ground, and ran up to me. He threw his arms around me in a huge bear hug. I almost fell over because I was so surprised and shocked. Thank goodness for those three years as a trapeze artist! Ha. I’m just kidding you. If I hadn’t had a weird talent at balancing, I would have probably fallen over into something else, and then I didn’t have anything else to wear. For a few moments that seemed to last forever Adam and I stood in that bear hug.

              “I’ve missed you so much!” I admitted.

              “That’s nice. It’s always good to know that it’s not a one-sided relationship. It’s great to know that one of your friends has missed you!” He let go of me and greeted Hank with the same gruff bear hug that he had just given me. What? I’m just a friend? Am I one of the guys all of sudden? Oh no! He had used the “f” word. No, not the one that you’re thinking of! There are lots of “f” words! Get your mind out of the gutter. Jeez. Sometimes you make me sad!

              “So how’s it going, Hank? Can you believe that the cops wanted a background check on you to see if you were okay to watch over me as a guardian? It’s so cool living with you!”

              “Thanks. There’s not much going on except I accidentally let Ashley fall into a huge pile of…”

              “Adam, why are you talking to Hank? You see him all the time! I want to talk to you before you go away again,” I interrupted Hank.

              “Right. Well, my case has a new development!” Adam came over to me.

              “Hey, Adam, can I talk to you for a second?” Hank called Adam back.

              “Sure, I’ll be back in a flash, Ash!” Adam ran away. I don’t know what they talked about, but whatever it was made Hank angry. He stormed off.

              “Adam, what was all that about?” I asked.

              “Oh, nothing. Hank just wanted to know if I was looking for anyone as a permanent legal guardian.”

              “And?”

              “Oh, I just said that I’d rather be on my own. Who needs a guardian? I told him that there’s nothing more I would hate than to be stuck with the same person all the time!” Adam dismissed it, “So how’ve you been? I’ve missed you a lot. Did you get my present?”

              “Yeah. It was one of the nicest things that anyone has ever done for me. Thanks.”

              “No problem, it feels like it’s been ages since we’ve talked,” Adam said.

              “It has been. Do you want to go for a walk or something?” I laid my head in the curve of his shoulder.

              “As long as I’m with you!” He kissed my neck. “I’m so glad to see you.”

              “That’s so sweet. Tell me all about the case. Is it bad? I haven’t really gotten to hear much about it,” I inquired.

              “No, it’s not that bad at all. They’re going to go easier on me than I thought.”

              “I want to know everything!”

              “I don’t really want to talk about it. I came here to see you, not to relive what I’m trying to escape from for an hour.” We sat down on the port together.

              “You don’t want to talk about the case?” I was dumbfounded.