Female Ejaculation (41 page)

Short of intercourse, you’ve got it all now: the clitoris, G-spot, and energy to carry you to single, multiple, and extended orgasms. Play there long enough, and you’ll catapult yourself into the non-stop O-Zone. We’ve saved the best for last: blended orgasm. This is a process of merging multiple stimulation and riding the wave. Blended orgasm originally referred to the clitoris and the vagina climaxing at the same time. We extend the term to including excitement of the lips, breasts, womb, and even the mind for that matter. Now that you’ve mastered supreme bliss, you can also blend energy play with any of these orgasmic triggers.

Dealing with multiple sources of pleasure is both the delight and challenge of blended orgasm. You, the receiver, will receive more
sensation from more sources than you’re accustomed to. Can you deal with such intense feeling? Can you handle it? Can you pump that much energy fast into your pleasure balloon? Is it flexible and expandable enough to absorb it all?

If you drop into a meditative, no-mind condition, surrender to the natural forces within your body, and let the pleasure sweep you away, you’ll soar on wings of ecstasy. Delightful as it is, losing control like this can be extremely scary at first.

The giver of blended stimulation has a major challenge as well. The giver has to pay attention to two or more different actions with different responses. It’s like playing two different musical instruments at the same time or like listening to two different stereo channels simultaneously.

Without confidence, experience, and total presence, a lover can’t give each separate channel the attention it deserves. This is even more demanding for novice self-pleasuring when you have to both give and receive simultaneously.

Going for blended orgasm inside and outside the vagina simultaneously requires two fingers, hands, or sex toys. Inside, you can use one or more fingers on the G-spot, a dildo with or without vibration, or a G-spot wand. Outside, you have the option of using one or more fingers on the clitoris or a little vibrator.

A giver at the receiver’s side with fingers inside the vagina can stimulate the clitoris with the thumb of the same hand. Skilled lovers sometimes cup the vulva and rest their palm on the clitoris or mons (the mound of the pubic bone.) This allows the other hand free to press on the receiver’s pubic bone or lower abdomen covering her womb. Many women enjoy this added stimulation of the sexually responsive acupressure points on the top ridge of the pubic bone. Some report feeling delicious pressure on the G-spot from the outside. Of course, using orgasmic breathing to stream energy from the clitoris and G-spot is always available to the receiver.

You can do the previous exercise just as well with oral stimulation of the clitoris using your mouth, lips, and tongue. Many women experience even more intense pleasure this way.

There are so many variations and options that the subject demands a book all its own. In the meantime, by using the sensitivity and skills you’ve developed so far, adding oral play to the clitoris should be an easy jump. Positioning the giver’s body can be a challenge when combining oral and G-spot play. Experiment so that your neck doesn’t stiffen up and your penetration hand doesn’t cramp.

Are things coming together for you yet? We hope so. While it may seem like a lot to do to reach your ultimate goal — female ejaculation — it’s the best way we know to get there, while also discovering other intense sensations along the way.

The clitoris, the vagina, and the G-spot are all pathways to orgasm, as are other parts of your body, mind, and soul. Using orgasmic breathing can harness your sexual energy to contribute as well and can all lead you to a single climax, a series of multiple ones, an extended orgasm, and/or an ejaculation response. Blend them, and the O-Zone
is just around some unexpected corners, as is that gush of liquid you’re hungry for.

As the receiver, we encourage you to study your pathways to different orgasmic experiences. Discover for yourself how to fill your pleasure balloon and soar to new heights of ecstasy. How can you best use peaking and plateauing? How many and what kind of orgasms propel you into the most ecstatic of states?

If it takes you weeks, months, or even years to appreciate the ecstatic states awaiting you inside your body, that’s fine. When you’re ready, the next chapter expands the game to include intercourse and the prospect of sacred simultaneous orgasm. Whether you achieve ejaculation right away or not, it’s certainly a fun road to travel along the way, isn’t it?

— MALLINAGA VATSYAYANA, FROM
THE KAMA SUTRA
TRANSLATED BY ALAIN DANIELOU

 

If you’ve read and played through this book chapter by chapter, you now realize that there’s more to ejaculation and ecstasy than just pushing the right button. You need to prepare physically and spiritually.

The more open the receiver’s energy channels, the greater the pleasure she feels, and the more likely she’ll be able to ejaculate. The better the giver’s partnership and more stimulating the loveplay, the more responsive her G-spot will be.

If you’ve experimented with the practices so far, you must realize by now that hitting your beloved’s G-spot with a penis is far from automatic. As you learned with finger massage, there’s an art and science to locating, engorging, and pleasuring the G-spot.

In this chapter, you’ll learn how to stimulate the G-spot through intercourse. Every penis and vagina is different. Based on how his and hers interact, we’ll explain how some fit better than others and what to do about the discrepancies.

Varying your sexual position is one primary method to best match the penis and the vagina to produce maximum G-spot excitement. The
Kama Sutra
is probably the best known manual that addresses this.

If you’ve come right to this chapter, you’re probably interested in making your sexual union more exciting. Great!

The bad news is that you missed how to locate and stimulate the G-spot, not to mention awakening the subtle energies laying dormant inside that can really supercharge your sexual play and lead to female ejaculation.

If you want, carry on trying out the
Kama Sutra
sex positions in this chapter. Just realize that applying the practices of the previous chapters will boost your chances of mutual pleasure enormously.

The
Kama Sutra
is a Hindu love manual that’s nearly 2000 years old. It was translated into English by Sir Richard Burton during the 19th century. He was a much earlier nobleman with the same name as the well-known modern English actor. The
Kama Sutra
is actually just a depiction of sexual customs in India during the early centuries of the common era, but it still has much to offer us.

For example, the author, Mallinaga Vatsyayana, was very forthright about things we’re too ashamed or embarrassed to talk about today — things like lovemaking positions. Though we don’t know much about him, we do know that he was a sage and religious scholar who lived in Pataliputra, India between Benares and Calcutta sometime between 200 and 500 AD.

He didn’t pull any punches. The
Kama Sutra
was meticulous and graphic about seduction, foreplay, sex, and love relationships, and this made it the definitive guide to sexual etiquette of the times.

What was the purpose of this treasured window into the past? You might have read that
Kama Sutra
means “love songs.” This sounds wonderful but isn’t particularly accurate.

Kama
is often defined as love, a rather broad term that means various things to different people at different times. More exactly, this “kama” is about desire and pleasure derived from the senses. Kama is the enjoyment you glean from hearing, feeling, seeing, tasting, and smelling.

A simple definition of
sutra
is “rule,” which would make the meaning of the title, “Rules Of Pleasure.” Actually, a sutra was an aphorism, the briefest possible statement of a principle. Back then, few people could read or write. The common practice was to condense knowledge into sutras that could be easily memorized. In B.C. times, education was done mostly through oral tradition.

Vatsyayana compiled the customs of his era into these short pithy sayings. Unless you understand the history and depth behind the sutras, it’s easy to misunderstand or miss his points completely.

Maybe our curiosity about this old book of sayings stems from living in a sex negative society, one that doesn’t accept, value, or embrace erotic play as an essential part of life. To truly benefit from studying the
Kama Sutra
, you have to recognize that it was all about another time and place. Ancient India was a highly sex positive culture very foreign to ours today.

The
Kama Sutra
documented the erotic lifestyle of the most privileged upper class. Many of these people were obsessed with sex and seduction. Premarital and extramarital sex were common and accepted, as long as one followed politically correct guidelines, of course. Vatsyayana was sort of the sexual Emily Post of his time.