Flare (6 page)

“I’m not sure I’m doing the best job right now with stability. The new nanny starts today. I wish I could’ve taken time off work instead.”

“The nanny could be a good thing, but you’ll have a few weeks of transition. You might be better prepared if you expect things to be bad for a bit,” she said with warning.

“Hugo’s going to be out of town for nearly two weeks. The timing couldn’t be worse, could it?” Kevin fisted his leather desk pad, then picked up his pen. He wrote
Hugo Gone
in so many boxes the paper calendar looked full. He knew his days were going to feel very empty, though. So far, they knew of fifteen. Fifteen days without Hugo that month alone. At least it was for work and not because he was running away scared.

“Is there a way you can meet with me later in the week?” Lori asked. “I think it would be beneficial to make sure we’re on the same page, and I can answer any questions you might have.”

“Yeah. I think that would be good.”

Fifty minutes later, Kevin was walking to the front of a large lecture hall on the University of Minnesota’s West Bank campus, tie straightened, blazer buttoned, PowerPoint data stored on a USB drive, and a façade that told the world he had everything under control.

Inside, he felt as if he were crumbling to dust.

CHAPTER FIVE

Mapping the Way

H
UGO
HELPED
Rowan get settled in her new room, which used to be Erin’s. Kevin had initially suggested one of the guest rooms in the basement, especially considering there was basically an apartment down there, but when the nightmares and the bedwetting kept waking the kids, Hugo wondered if maybe upstairs would be a better place for her to at least start out. She could claim the larger guest room downstairs as her get-away space too, but sleeping closer to the children might be beneficial.

Erin’s old room had been cleaned out for a couple of months already, items distributed to their new owners or put in storage, so it had gone back to being the guest room. It had reminded him of her last days, so Hugo repainted it, rearranged the furniture, and bought new bedding to make it feel different. He couldn’t help but think of it as Erin’s room still. Everyone else in the house seemed to do better with it, because it had been a guest room for much longer.

Rowan was very sweet, but Hugo could see how exhausted she was, so he left her to unpack and rest, heading back downstairs to get breakfast ready for the kids. He noticed the stack of outlet covers he’d taken off to paint the living room two weeks ago, so he took a few minutes to screw those back into place now that the paint was cured. When he got done, he scanned the room. He liked the lively green; it looked fresh. That was the last room he’d had to paint to get Kevin’s house away from the boring palette of show-house beige and cream. Now it felt warm and cheery, like a place where Hugo could feel at home.

He put the screwdriver away and washed his hands before pulling down bowls and spoons for the kids. Orange juice was poured into tiny glasses before Hugo allowed himself to take a few sips from his coffee mug. Brooke joined him first and was crunching on her second bowl of cereal when Finn came downstairs.

“Do you remember today is when you get to meet Rowan?” he asked.

“Yeah. Is she here already? Is that why the door was shut upstairs?” Brooke asked.

“Yep. She’s taking a nap because her flight was really long. We’ll need to show her around the neighborhood today, and Finn, you see Lori this afternoon. And remember I’m flying out for a few weeks of work.”

The sound of a door opening and closing upstairs drew everyone’s attention to the steps.

“Hello,” Rowan said, wiping at her eyes with the back of her hand as she descended. She joined them in the kitchen. “I’m Rowan. And you must be Finn and Brooke. It’s good to meet you.”

Hugo watched as the kids introduced themselves, shaking her hand and telling her a little bit about who they were and what they liked to do. After grabbing a clean bowl for Rowan to pour some cereal and milk for herself, Hugo sat back. He knew the kids needed to create a good relationship with this woman, and since Rowan wasn’t new to this profession, he was more than glad to allow her to take the lead.

It was immediately obvious she was good with kids, asking engaging questions and getting them to open up about their various likes and dislikes within minutes. She even got Brooke to share and laugh, which could be hard at times, at least on first meetings.

“Did you get any rest, or did you just lie there wide awake?” he asked.

“It’s always so hard. I’m exhausted, but I couldn’t truly relax. I might be better off going to bed tonight and just living off tea today.”

“Ah yes, tea. I had a feeling you might be a tea drinker, but I know we Americans don’t really know much about tea, so that might need to be the first order of business today: get to the store and get some good tea for you.”

“The last time I worked in the United States I couldn’t find much decent tea. Most teabags seemed to be filled with tea dust or something equally as dreadful. I thought I was drinking the sweepings from the factory floor, it was so weak.” Rowan’s laughter was warm, making the skin around her green eyes crinkle and her full lips stretch thin. She had a cute ski slope of a nose dusted with freckles that continued over the apples of her cheeks. “But I lived in a much smaller town then. I’m sure I’ll find something here.”

“Where did you live before?” Brooke asked. “Was it in Minnesota?”

“No. I lived in Kalispell, Montana, for two years. It’s a beautiful town nestled in the mountains, but it was fairly remote. I grew up in a suburb of London, so it was a bit of culture shock. Fell in love with a real live cowboy, though, even if he did break my heart.”

“I’ve never had good luck with cowboys myself,” Hugo said but then physically pulled back at his frankness. “Sorry. I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable.”

Finn laughed and said, “It’s okay, Hugo. We all know you love Daddy anyway.”

“Yep,” he said nervously.

“I’m not bothered at all. My best mate has been with his partner for nearly ten years.”

“Nice,” Hugo said. “I’m new to all this when kids are involved. I’ve been out to the world since I was barely eighteen, but outing myself is different than
outing
the whole family.” He turned to put his bowl in the dishwasher, rolling his eyes at himself for allowing his tongue to get away from him before turning back. “Okay, we’d better get to the grocery store. Actually, let’s go to Uptown to this place I know. I’ll show you my apartment too. Kevin put a key to that on your keychain, just in case you need to get in for whatever reason. Finn, do you want to let Lulu out one more time before we go? And Brooke, please get her fresh water and make sure her food dish is filled. We’re leaving in about five minutes.”

R
ATHER
THAN
struggling to find a parking space close to the shop, Hugo parked in his assigned spot at his apartment building, and they all walked. Rowan easily found tea to suit her tastes, surprised by the myriad of choices.

“You have an amazing selection here,” she told the salesman who was helping her as Brooke lingered nearby. When Brooke tasted a sample of peach tea, she wanted to buy some as well, so Hugo relented and bought her a tin. He had a feeling he’d be returning from Los Angeles to a tea-drinking Brooke who was suddenly speaking in a British accent and asking for soft-boiled eggs and soldiers for breakfast rather than her preferred waffles.

Hugo showed Rowan his apartment and gave her the penny tour of the now-sparsely decorated space. So much of Hugo’s stuff was at Kevin’s, only the big pieces, things on the walls, and nonessentials were left behind, like tchotchkes and the closet filled with his drag wardrobe. The place looked like a furnished apartment that was move-in ready.

Hugo explained how he was at Kevin’s nearly all the time, and it was only a matter of time before the place wasn’t going to be his any longer. He was still reluctant to let it go, but not nearly as much as he’d been right after Erin died. Grief changed people. Hugo didn’t know whether it would change his relationship with Kevin to the point they wouldn’t be able to make it work. That didn’t seem to be happening, though. Now his reluctance had more to do with leaving this part of his life behind, this rich, vibrant part that could shine in Uptown.

“It’s in a great location,” Rowan said as she looked out his balcony toward Lake Calhoun.

“It is. Uptown has been my neighborhood for a lot of years. I love this part of Minneapolis.”

“I can see why. The lake looks beautiful.”

“Would you like to go see it up close? It’s only a few blocks away.”

“Sure.”

“You can bring the kids here anytime. There’s a lot to do,” Hugo shared as they headed toward the water. He pointed out a few favorite shops and described several other points of interest she might like to consider checking out soon that were only a few blocks from his place.

As they started walking around the lake, Brooke and Finn strolled ahead, a little too impatient to walk at the leisurely pace Rowan and Hugo were content to take.

“I understand things have been pretty rough for them in the last year,” Rowan said softly.

“You could say that. I know Kevin explained everything to you already, but seeing it is another thing. Finn’s having the harder time, but don’t let Brooke fool you. She keeps a lot inside. It takes her a while to open up, but if you’re persistent and let her know you’re honestly interested in her, not just being nosy, she’ll eventually relax. She still tells me more than she ever told her mom or dad. At least that’s what she says to me.”

“You have kind eyes,” Rowan said.

“I do?”

“Well, I can tell you care a lot about them, so I can see why Brooke feels comfortable chatting you up.”

“You could tell that in this short a time?” he teased.

“My job is to understand people, and I’m a pretty good judge of character. I’ve had to be, or I couldn’t still be doing this job. You mentioned Finn’s having a hard time. What are you noticing?”

“Bed-wetting and nightmares.”

“Okay. I’m generally a light sleeper, so I’ll do my best to catch that so you and Kevin can sleep.”

“That’s okay. We don’t mind being woken up with this. I’m not sure how Finn would do with you in the middle of either of those things yet. He’s embarrassed about the bed-wetting, and the dreams often leave him extremely emotional. He seems to need one of us to help calm him down. Maybe eventually, which is why we put you upstairs, but I think you and Finn will need to get closer before he’ll be comfortable.”

“Understood. I’ll do my best to earn his trust. It sounds like you and Kevin are pretty hands-on parents,” she said.

“Yeah. How can you not be?”

“Well, I’m used to being hired to basically come in and act as the parent from the moment the kids wake up until they’re in bed, aside from a few well-planned family activities here and there.”

“What do you mean? Like, parents aren’t spending any time with their kids at all throughout the day?”

“Pretty much.”

“Why become a parent if you don’t want to… parent?” Hugo asked, and he saw a small smile form on Rowan’s face.

“I’ve often wondered the same thing, but it’s not really my place to question that. I simply do my best to be a good nanny and keep in touch with those kids once I’ve moved away.”

“Crazy. I never thought I’d raise kids, but now I can’t imagine not having those two in my life. Even hiring you was a hard decision for us, but I’ve basically allowed my career to stagnate the last six months, aside from the sort of stuff I’m heading to LA to do this week. My first love is the stage, but it makes pennies compared to the jobs I’m doing this summer. I just got a call about another job this morning, and I’ll be gone even more than I thought, so it’s a good thing Kevin took the initiative and hired you. But this is an entirely new situation for all of us. I hope we don’t screw things up.”

“I’m glad I could be here, and I doubt there will be any screwing up. An adjustment period is sure to be in order, yes, but I’m not new to this,” Rowan said with a confident nod. “We’ll figure it out together. I promise.”

T
HE
REST
of the morning, Hugo drove around showing Rowan the various locations she’d need to drive Brooke and Finn. While she hadn’t driven in the US since she lived in Montana, Rowan had an international driver’s license, and at the next stop, Hugo allowed her to drive on the backstreets. He breathed a huge sigh of relief when he saw how good a driver she was. That had been one of his greatest concerns about leaving so soon after Rowan arrived. What if she struggled with driving on the right rather than the left side of the road? Hugo had worried he’d need to cancel his trip, but it was obvious Rowan had a lot of experience driving.

“I had a Mini back home,” she shared at a stop light in Hugo’s burnt-orange Mini Cooper. Granted, the entire steering column had been on the other side, but Hugo was glad his car was at least familiar to her.

On the way home, they stopped at a deli to take out a late lunch, and Rowan drove home, pointing out familiar landmarks as if reminding herself how to get back. While they sat on stools pulled up to the kitchen counter, Hugo showed Rowan a three-ring binder he and Kevin had put together that contained maps, phone numbers, addresses, and a well-established calendar. They’d worked on it for what seemed like weeks, Summer making suggestions one evening when she and Russell were over for movie night with the kids.

“One other thing,” he said, handing Rowan a cell phone. “We got you a phone. We figured it might be easier to stay in touch this way. Kevin and I use an online calendar we’ve invited you to use, and the phone has GPS and all that so you won’t get lost as easily; that was more for us than you, probably,” he admitted with a laugh. “We wanted to give you paper copies of everything Kevin preprogrammed into the phone as well,” he said, gesturing to the two items in front of her and then reaching over to pat the binder.