Forever Yours (#4) (4 page)

“Ryan, look at me,” I say as I reach out and gently touch his face. He pulls away
from me, and he begins to ask me questions that I don’t have the answers to.

“Why are you so cold? What were you doing to that guy? I saw you … bite him.
What’s wrong with you?” Crap he knows that something is wrong. Perhaps I
can convince him that I was just kissing the guy, and that he is far too drunk.

“I don’t know what you’re taking about. I was just dancing with a cute guy.
Ryan, how much beer have you drank?” Ryan rolls his eyes at me and he flings
his hands into the air. Maybe he isn’t as drunk as I thought.

“Don’t do that. I know what I saw. You bit into that guy’s skin and you…”
Ryan trails off in mid-sentence, and he brushes his hair away from his forehead.
He shakes his head and he looks deep into my eyes. I can’t meet his stare, I turn
away from him. He reaches out and grabs onto my icy chin. He stares at me in
disbelief –crap. He tilts my chin towards him and he forces me to meet his gaze.
I lock my stinging eyes on his, and he jumps as he takes in my appearance. He
can’t believe his eyes and he can’t stop staring at me. My lips start to shake, and
I feel my desire slipping off the scale. I can see his veins and I imagine what his
blood would taste like. But a crippling fear of hurting my friend takes over my
body, and I ignore my bloodlust. As I stare into his eyes, I realise that Ryan
knows what I am. “Rose, what are you?”

“You know what I am.” Ryan shakes his head and he looks confused.

“No, I don’t. I have an idea, but it’s crazy. You can’t be what I’m thinking. It’s
not possible.” I inhale his scent –beer and cigarettes and I smile at him as I
reveal my secret.

“I’m a vampire.” Ryan pushes me away and he rhythmically holds his hands at
his mouth. He is speechless and I realise that I need to convince him not to be
scared of me, and to not tell anyone about me. I can’t risk exposition –Dalton
would never forgive me. “Ryan, I know this has come as a shock to you. But
please I need you to keep my secret. I know that what I’m asking you is huge,
but please can you do this for me?”

“How can you ask me that?” Ryan says in a broken voice. I reach out and grab
his face.

 

“Please, I’m begging you. Don’t tell anyone what I am.” Ryan looks worried
and his face is burning.

 

“Who are you? My friend can’t be a … vampire. They don’t exist, what have
you done with Rose?” I sigh –he needs help.

“Ryan, look at me. It’s me Rose, I’m here and I have told you what I am. Please
keep my secret.” Ryan considers my words and I begin to panic when I stare
over at Dalton. He sees the anguish on my face, so he leaps from the bar stool
and he flies over to me. My mind starts to rush in a million directions. I don’t
know how he will react to this. He has told me that he can’t risk being exposed
as a vampire. How is he going to feel when he finds out that Ryan knows? I
can’t even bring myself to think of what he could do to Ryan. Dalton is a lot
more ravenous, and not as understanding as me. He doesn’t care about Ryan
and he has killed before. As I watch him staring down at me, I realise that I
can’t and won’t let him hurt Ryan.

“Rose, what is going on here?” Dalton’s voice is firm. I sense that he isn’t
happy that I am holding onto Ryan. I consider his feelings and I pull my hands
away from Ryan. I shoot Dalton a worried look, and he reaches out and pulls
me off the seat. He wraps his arm around my waist. He squeezes me tightly as
he leads me out of the bar. We step out into the dark street and Dalton spins me
around. His eyes are burning, he isn’t happy. He wickedly stares at me and he
quickly makes his feelings clear. “What was that? What were you doing with
him?” My body tenses and I freeze. I can’t bring myself to look at him, or to tell
him what has happened. Dalton shakes me and he urges me to speak. “Tell me
what’s wrong?” He snaps. I feel a soft tear fall from my eye, and I quickly wipe
it away. Dalton’s eyes soften at my emotions. “Rose, just tell me.” I swirl my
tongue around in my burning throat and I bring myself to confess.

“Ryan knows that I’m a vampire.” Dalton’s eyes flash red and he shakes me.
“How did he find out? Did you tell him?”

“I did, but only because he saw me feeding on that guy. I tried to lie, but he
wouldn’t believe me. My eyes flashed red, and he knew what I was. I had to tell
him.” Dalton lets go of me and he begins to pace across the street. His footsteps
are loud and his breathing is deep. I don’t know what he’s going to say or do.
My heart can’t take the anticipation.

“We can’t stay here anymore. Not when that guy knows what you are. We need
to leave, now.” Dalton rushes over to me and he grabs me by the arm. He leads
me along the quiet street, until we are at the edge of the woods. My brain won’t
function –I am frozen.

“I can’t leave. What about my uncle? This is crazy, we need to go back. I’ll talk
to Ryan. I’ll make sure that he doesn’t tell anybody.” Dalton laughs at me.
“Don’t you get it? He knows about you. If we stay here, we’ll always be in his
debt. Looking over our shoulders and wondering if he is gonna tell.”
“If I could just talk to him, I could make him understand. He is my friend, he
won’t tell anybody.”

 

“Rose, we can’t trust him. I have seen this too many times before. You need to
listen to me. We need to leave Portland.”

Dalton and I raced back to his house, in silence. He hasn’t uttered a word to me
since we got home, and now he and Nicholas are talking in the kitchen. I can
hear what they are saying, but I close my ears because I don’t want to hear. I
know what the conclusion is going to be. Dalton is going to make me leave, and
that’s something that I don’t want to do. I know that I choose this. I choose to
be a vampire, and I have to live with that, forever. I don’t regret my choice and
Dalton is all that I ever want. But my feelings for my family have multiplied,
and I don’t want to leave them. I am ageless and I am not going to die. But my
uncle and his family grow closer to death every day. I will have to spend an
eternity without them, so forgive me if I am being selfish. But I want to spend
as much time with my family as I can. I can’t believe the events that took place
tonight. I fed on someone, and I had the strength not to hurt him. I felt his
emotions as I drank his blood, and I heard his thoughts. He wasn’t scared of me,
he liked me. He adored the pleasure that I gave him, and he wanted more. He
didn’t want me to stop, and I didn’t want to. Something inside of me stopped
me from hurting him. My bloodlust was high and domineering, but my heart
was soft and I cared about him. I didn’t want to hurt him, so I fought my nature,
and I am so proud of myself for that. When I first turned, I was scared that I
wouldn’t be able to control my hunger. But tonight, I showed myself that I can.
I don’t have to kill people in order to survive. And maybe just maybe, I can be
around my family and not hurt them.

I can hear Dalton and Nicholas discussing me in the kitchen. Dalton is saying
that we need to leave. Nicholas is sort of agreeing with him, but he is
considering my feelings more than Dalton is. I can’t believe what he’s saying.
He speaks about me as if he really cares for me. He doesn’t want me to miss out
on seeing my family. I am confused; I thought he didn’t care about anyone or
anything?

“Dalton you have to let Rose see her family. When I read her mind, she showed
me how much she cared about them. Brother, she has an eternity to be without
them. You can’t deny her access to her own family. She will only rebel against
you. We both know that you love her, and that you wouldn’t survive if you
weren’t with her. I know that we have to leave, but you need to let her see her
family, before it’s too late.”

I slowly climb off the sofa and I tip-toe towards the door. I can hear Dalton’s
shallow breathing and Nicholas’s sighing. I push open the door, and I walk out
into the hallway. The floor boards gently creek under my feet, and I panic in
case Dalton heard me. I settle my racing heart and I walk along the wide
hallway. I reach the front door and I quietly push it open. I step out into the
bitter night, and I don’t look back. I run along the driveway in the direction of
the woods. I glide through the trees at lighting pace, and I don’t stop until I
reach Portland. The town is dead and there is no one around, so I take advantage
and I run along the streets. I reach my house, and I see that there is a light on in
the lounge. I take a deep breath and I walk up to the window. I peek in through
the tired curtains. I can see that my uncle is sitting in his chair. The TV is loud.
I can hear that he is watching the latest game through the walls of the house. My
eyes focus on my uncle’s face, and I sense that he is tired and lonely. As I stare
at him more, I feel the urge to go in and wrap my arms around him. But that
isn’t possible –I need to be invited in. I quickly scan the streets to make sure
that Dalton hasn’t followed me, and I sigh when I don’t see him. I can hear my
uncle sighing as he watches the game –can I bring myself to knock on the door?
My frozen heart is pounding through my shirt and I can feel my eyes stinging. I
remember Dalton’s advice, I breathe through my desire until the stinging stops.
I make a brave decision; I walk over to the front door. My cold hand rises and
meets the wood of the door. I bang my fist against the door. I can hear my uncle
shuffling off his chair. The light in the hallway lights up and then the door
opens. My uncle can’t believe his eyes when he sees me, and he wastes no time
in telling me how happy he is to see me.

“Bugs, you’re home.” He gushes. I smile at him, whilst I continue to breathe
through my desire –
you won’t hurt him Rose.

 

“I’m home,” I say with a huge grin on my face.

“Why are you standing in the cold, get in here?” My uncles words ring in the air
–was that an invitation? I move my foot forward, and I smile when it passes the
door frame. I walk into the house and my uncle escorts me into the lounge. He
sets himself back down onto his chair, and he turns down the volume –it’s still
deafening to my ears. I nervously sit down onto the sofa, and I wait for uncle’s
disappointed words. But I am surprised when he doesn’t have something
negative to say. “Did you have fun with Dalton?” My uncle asks in a smooth
tone. My eyes jump out of their sockets –he isn’t mad at me?

“Yeah we had a great time. I thought that you would be mad at me?” My uncle
nods at me and then he pushes his glasses further up the bridge of his nose. He
adjusts himself in the chair and then he locks his eyes on mine.

“I’m not entirely happy with you, but you’re an adult now. I can’t force to stay
away from him. I’m not gonna to tell you what to do. You are your own
woman, and you can make your own decisions. I don’t particularly like the guy,
but I know that you do. I’m willing to tolerate him.” I smile at my uncle –he is
amazing. I lunge forward and I wrap my arms around his neck. He flinches and
shivers at my touch. I pull away from him –I can’t risk his questions. “Wow
Bugs you’re freezing. You’d better get off to bed.” I laugh at him, and then I
nod and make my way over to the door. I stop in the doorjamb, and I look back
at my uncle –I’m going to miss him so much when I leave.

I have brushed my teeth and changed into my oversized t-shirt. I scrunched my
hair into a bun and now I am settled nicely into my bed. My head rests against
the soft pillow, everything feels familiar. I can smell my scent on the covers,
and I can feel the energy that burns through the room. I have had many
wonderful nights in here. Sleeping, watching movies and let’s not forget about
my nights with Dalton. I remember when he fed on me. I felt an overwhelming
pleasure erupting through my body; I didn’t want him to stop. I close my eyes
and I can see him lying on my bed, that morning I decided to ask Nicholas to
change me. A vision of him is in my mind, and a crippling fear takes over my
vampire body. He is going to be so mad at me for running out tonight. But I was
willing to risk his wrath, because I wanted to prove to him and to myself, that I
could be around my family and not hurt them. When I was with my uncle, I felt
normal. I didn’t want to feed on him –I love him too much to risk hurting him.
My icy hearts stops, when I hear my windows blow open. I jump out of my bed
and I rush towards the window. I jump when Dalton stumbles in through the
window and crashes against me. His body is jolted onto mine, his breathing is
heavy. He looks at with me with that red stare, and my heart breaks. I have
caused him pain and I need to apologise for my actions. I part my lips as I
prepare to speak, but Dalton talks first.

“Rose, why did you run off like that? I was so worried about you. I thought that
you … left me.” Crap, I hate that I have made him feel like this –
sort it out
Rose, now.
I run my hands across his broad shoulders and I walk him over to
my bed. I fall onto the surface, and I pull Dalton down next to me. As he
crashes down onto the bed, he pulls me closer to him and he forces me to rest
my head onto his chest. He holds my icy body close to his, and I begin to tell
him how sorry I am for running away.

“I’m sorry. I never meant to hurt you. I just needed to see my Uncle. I wanted to
prove to you and to myself that I could be around him.” Dalton sighs and he
flashes me his red stare –this is usually the part where he would feed on me.
Now I am a vampire, he doesn’t have that luxury. I feel bad that I have taken his
pleasure away from him, but at the same time, I am glad because now I can be
with him forever.
“When you went behind my back and asked Nicholas to turn you, I was
heartbroken. I felt useless and pathetic. I never wanted this life for you. But now
you’re a vampire, there is nothing that I can do to change that. I know that your
family means a lot to you, but you have to accept the fact that we can no longer
stay in Portland. Your friend knows what you are, and it won’t end well for him.
No matter how much you believe that he won’t tell anyone, you can never fully
trust him. Knowing about vampires eats away at humans. They’re either scared,
or they want us to turn them. It isn’t fair to put the boy through that; we need to
leave, Rose.” As I run my fingers along his chest I sigh. I know that he is right,
we need to leave. But the thought of how my uncle will react, numbs my
vampire body. I can’t begin to think how upset he will be, he will be
heartbroken. I will bring him stress that he doesn’t need, and that thought
cripples me. My uncle has a hard life. He works hard to pay the bills, and
Rachel tortures him. I have tried to be the good one in the family, but now I am
about to be the worst of them all. I’m going to break my uncle’s heart by
leaving him, forever.