Fragments: Poems, Intimate Notes, Letters (16 page)

BOOK: Fragments: Poems, Intimate Notes, Letters
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LEE AND PAULA STRASBERG

 

 

When Marilyn arrived in New York at the beginning of 1955, she soon found her heart’s dream: the Actors Studio, which she hoped would open the doors to a new status as an artist. Just as quickly, Lee Strasberg saw how exceptional she was, bursting with a talent seeking to express itself fully. However, Marilyn had a major shortcoming: she was always late. Lee had his reservations about this, and when she admitted that she was absolutely unable to be on time, he replied cuttingly: “Well, be early then.” This explains the playful tone of the brief text in which she quotes a line from one of her early films that speaks of punctuation instead of punctuality…The fragile confidence she developed often shifted to anguish and despair. What would happen if she lost her concentration, the only thing that kept an actor from suicide, to repeat Lee Strasberg’s striking phrase? In February 1961, Marilyn thought she was checking into the hospital for a rest cure but instead found herself confined to a psychiatric cell at Payne Whitney in New York. Her friends couldn’t respond to her cry for help, as, legally speaking, they weren’t family members (Joe DiMaggio, whom she had divorced in 1954, would finally rescue her from this nightmare). In any case, Marilyn proved single-minded. Prompted by her sense of having escaped from quicksand, in a resolute letter to Lee Strasberg dated December 19, 1961, she laid out her plan for a new independent production company, which would make sense to her only if Lee were associated with it. To the very end, she wanted to be free of the studios, but this time she wanted to challenge them on their turf, in Hollywood.

 

Oh yes Mr. Oxl
e
y is
always
complaining about my
pu
n
ctuation
so
now
I’m careful to get here
before
9:00
. Mr. Oxl
e
y is on
telephone won’t you sit down

 

loose letting go
voice starts back the
a
tre

 

[following is written by Lee Strasberg]
Don’t be nervous Marilyn
you are doing swell &
you look wonderful—
L.

 

Notes:

The chronically late pupil used this line from Monkey Business (the 1952 Howard Hawks film in which Mr. Oxley is Marilyn’s director) with no little humor when addressing her teacher (who may have been speaking on the telephone at that moment).

 

 

To judge by his reply, it is not clear that Lee Strasberg understood either the allusion or the quotation.

 

Dear Lee

One of the most personally helpful things I’ve heard so far in my life was what you said in class friday afternoon—it was helpful
in that I feel as though I’m a little bit freer—also more—I can’t think of any I mean by that more relaxed
2 and 2 don’t necessarly make 4.

 

 

Paula dear,

You asked me yesterday why—

I felt somehow (I’m only conceiving of it this morning) that if I didn’t have the control or the will to make myself do anything simple & do it right I would never be able to act or do anything—I know it sounds crazy—maybe it was even superstitious—I don’t know—I don’t know anything.

Something
has happened I think to make me lose my confidence. I don’t know what it is. All I know is I want to
work
.

Oh Paula I wish I knew why I am so anguished. I think maybe I’m crazy like all the other members of my family were, when I was sick I was sure I was. I’m so glad you are with
me
here!

 

 

 

Marilyn Monroe with Paula and Lee Strasberg, New York, 1955

 

 

 

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