Going All the Way (4 page)

Chapter Five

The next morning Carrie woke early to make up for her disastrous painting session from the day before. The half-finished blue-grey tumultuous ocean picture mocked her from the corner, but she wouldn’t go back to it. This would be a new painting. A fresh painting with bright colors and
happy though
ts. But no matter how hard she tried, she couldn’t seem to get the colors blended right. The vision in her head was not translating to the canvas. She was tempted to toss it into the trash and start fresh.
Again
. She stood, stretched, refilled her coffee and was contemplating her options when the doorbell rang.

Welcoming the diversion, she answered the door. Ryan stood on her porch, a large bouquet of gorgeous, deep red roses in his hand. They smelled heavenly. She inhaled deeply, and then narrowed her eyes. “What are those for?” Roses from men, especially red roses, usually meant one of two things: ‘I fucked up’ or ‘I want something.’

“Consider these a thank you for taking care of Riley yesterday. You were right for giving me hell last night. I wasn’t thinking when I left him all alone outside all day. I appreciate everything you did for both of us.” He smiled that wide, charming smile of his, and she relaxed. A smidgen.

“They’re beautiful. Thank you.” She took them from him and stepped back. “Come on in.” She turned into the house, leaving the door open so he could follow her.

“Painting?” he asked as he approached the canvas on the easel next to the dining room table.

She grimaced. “Trying to.” She put the roses in a vase and placed it on the table. She eyed the full coffeepot at her elbow and sighed; he’d brought her flowers, which meant she had to be a gracious host. “Would you like some coffee?”

“I would love some,” he said. “But I can’t. I have to get to the office. We’re working on a big project and no matter what we come up with, the boss isn’t pleased.”

“Sorry to hear that,” she said absently as she stared at the roses—lush and beautiful—and started getting inspired for a completely different painting.
Thank goodness
.

He looked at her canvas and the mess of blue and yellow paint. “Maybe what you need is a distraction.”

She turned back to him and grinned. “Really?” Here it came, the sexual innuendos, the promises of a night she’d never forget, the jokes about fueling her inspiration. “And exactly what did you have in mind?” she asked, like she didn’t know. Though, suddenly a distraction with him did sound tempting. A little. No, she’d stay firm, no matter how strong the temptation. She had to focus on reinventing her goals and doing what makes her happy—
alone
.

“I could really use your help with Riley again,” he said.

Stunned, she looked up at him as reality crashed to the pit of her stomach. He wanted her to watch his dog. Nope, she hadn’t been expecting that. Though why, she couldn’t imagine. Of course that was what he wanted. Not her naked in his bed, no, he only wanted her dog-watching skills.

“I know you’re busy,” he continued, oblivious to her self-flagellation. “
I just don
’t know what to do with him. He refuses to go outside.”

How had she gotten him all wrong? She looked at the flowers again, her cheeks warming. She’d been right the first time. He did want something.

“I can’t.” Her disappointment morphed into anger at herself. “Not today. I have to focus on my painting.” She gestured at the mess on the canvas. “I wasn’t able to get much accomplished yesterday.”

“Riley is a really good dog. If he bothers you, lock him in the bathroom,” he pressed.

“What?” Surely she didn’t hear him right.
Lock him in the bathroom
? “That’
s outrageous.
”

“He doesn’t mind. Really.”

All thoughts of having sex with him instantly vanished from her mind. This guy couldn’t be for real.

Ryan shrugged. “He much prefers that to being left outside.”

She was tempted to say yes just to rescue the poor dog, but if she did, he would be back again tomorrow, and the day after that, and before she knew it she’d be a professional dog sitter. Last month she was the director of advertising for a Fortune 500 company, and now look at her.

Tears burned behind her eyes. Were all men the same? Only in it for what they could get out of her? And why did she keep letting it happen?

She wasn’t going to be maneuvered and manipulated again. Not this time, and certainly not by someone she barely even knew. She strode toward the front door and placed her hand on it, holding it open for him. “I’m sorry, Ryan, but I can’t watch your dog. Not now. Not ever.”

His look of surprise as he walked past her out the door was priceless. She was fairly certain he hadn’t a clue what he’
d done.
“Idiot,” she muttered as she shut the door behind him, and then walked over to the table, picked up the roses, and deposited them straight in the trash.

She was done doing a man’s bidding. From now on the only person she was going to try to please was herself. She had to start taking care of herself because there sure wasn’t anyone else around to do it for her.

Only that wasn’t working out so well, was it?

She just had to focus—on her goals, her painting, her exercising program, on
relaxing
. She could do this. She had to do this. She did five quick jumping jacks, leaned down and touched her toes, and swept her hands in a wide arc over her head on a deep breath, then let it out as she dropped her hands back to her side. Better. Now back to work. She sat before the canvas, got out another jar of paint, and went back to work.

Twenty minutes later she was about to pull her hair out. Riley was whining and crying on the other side of the wall, and she couldn’t think over the ruckus. That damn Ryan had actually locked the poor guy in the bathroom. Images of his big brown eyes filled with anguish haunted her thoughts. She threw down her brush and ran into the bathroom.

“It’s okay, Riley. You aren’t going to die in there,” she assured the dog through the bathroom wall.

The whimpering stopped for a minute. And then it started up again. There was nothing she could do, and there was no way she could go get him this time. He was locked in the house.

Before she went out of her mind, she moved her paints and easel into her bathroom and talked to the dog through the wall while she worked. He seemed to like that, and finally started to quiet down. She told him her whole life story. Why she was there. Why she left New York. He was a very good listener, but then for all she knew, he was snoozing away.

She tapped on the wall. “You awake, Riley?”

He barked, and she couldn’t help smiling. “I once had a dog like you when I was very young. You would have liked her. Her name was Dixie. She was a good dog. Got hit by a car, though, and died. That’s why you can’t run in the street. And why your owner shouldn’t leave you unattended all day. And locking you in the bathroom, why that’s just cruel and unusual punishment. You didn’t do anything wrong. It’
s indecent. Neglectful.”

Just thinking about it got her hackles back up. “Don’t you worry, I’m going to have a talk with him when he gets back. If he ever gets back.” She looked at her watch. Geez, it was past four o’clock and she’d been working in the bathroom all day. She looked at her canvas, and a painting of Riley stared back at her. Him stretched out on her leather sofa, red fur flaming against the white, paws draped regally over the edge. It wasn’t quite done, but it was well on its way. And she actually liked it.

She sighed.
“I think it’s time we call it a day.”

Riley barked from the other side of the wall.

“Don’t worry, that idiot owner of yours will be home soon, I’m sure.”

She quieted as she heard the man’s voice. “Riley, I’m home.”

Riley went nuts, barking with joy.

She heard Ryan enter the bathroom, talking to him in a baby voice. “Have you missed me? I’ve missed you. Yeah, there’s a good boy. You need to go out? I bet you do. Come on, let’s go out and go pee-pee. Let’s be a big boy and do our business. Yeah, there’s a good boy.”

She couldn’t help the grin stretching across her face, but it quickly disappeared when she realized how thin the walls were between their units. It was as if he were right there, standing in the next room. She’d have to keep that in mind the next time she wanted to sing in the shower.

She went into the kitchen and made herself a quick snack, and was just finishing up when her cell phone rang. She picked it up and stiffened—the display read
Stu
. Frowning, she answered. “
Hello?”

“Carrie, how are you?” Just hearing her ex-husband’s voice sent the blood racing through her veins. And not in a good way.

“I’m great,” she lied, adding a high-pitched lilt to her voice. “How are you?” she asked, only because politeness dictated it. Truly, she didn’t care how he was. In fact, he ranked right up there with the last person on earth she ever wanted to talk to again.

“Things could be better,” he admitted.

“Oh, sorry to hear that.” She wasn’t sorry. She didn’t care. She mentally searched for a way to get off the phone. Something she could say. A fire. A car accident. A typhoon heading her way.

“I heard you were back in town,” he said.

“Good news travels fast.”

“You’re home for good, I hope?” he said.

“Time will tell,” she said noncommittally.

“So, you think we can have lunch tomorrow? There’s something I need to talk to you about.”

Big surprise there. If there was anyone who could squeeze the blood out of a turnip, it was Stu Steinhem. “Oh, I don’t know Stu. I’m…” She looked toward the bathroom door and her paint supplies. “I’m real busy.” She could already feel the headache closing in.

“I’m sure you are. It won’t take long. It’s important.”

“Truth is, Stu, it’s really important I avoid stress. And you…well, you just have a way of bringing it out in me.”

“Me? I bring you stress? Sweetheart, you ooze the stuff. You create it all on your own.”

“Thanks for that.” It didn’t help that he was right, and she knew it.

“Just telling it like it is, darling.”

She took a deep breath. “Whatever you’re hoping to get out of me, it’s not going to happen. I’m not the same person I was before.”

“Sweetheart, talent like yours never dies.”

“That’s just it. I’m not working right now. I’m taking some much-needed time off. The only place I’m going to is to the park.” Carrie hung up the phone and poured herself a glass of wine. What could he want? Work. Obviously he wanted her to come back to work. She was always his best ad exec. She helped him make the company what it was, and it was their success that gave her a ticket out of San Francisco, out of their failed marriage, and into New York.

Only that hadn’t worked out much better.

And now he wanted her to come back to work. Oh, he didn’t come right out and say it, but she knew that’s what he wanted. What he always wanted from her.

She took her wine and went back into the bathroom, picked up her paints, and started painting again, concentrating on the colors, her strokes, and the different layers until she saw Riley coming to life on the canvas.

“You are one beautiful dog, Riley.”

Riley whined from the other side of the wall.

Had Ryan left that poor dog alone again? Annoyed, she finished her wine, plopped down onto the toilet seat, and dipped her brushes into the turpentine to clean them. What was wrong with men, anyway? How could they be so clueless? So selfish? “Well, screw them,” she told Riley. “We’re fine on our own.” And then she started to sing. Long and loud, and definitely off-key. And to her absolute joy, Riley sang along with her, howling high-pitched through the walls, urging her along. Filling her heart with happiness as she sang louder, rejoicing in the moment.

Until she heard
him
on the other side of the wall. Oh, God!
Ryan hadn’t gone
.

She shut her mouth, biting down on her lower lip as her face blossomed with heat.

Damn! First Stu and now this? Could her day possibly get any worse?

Thirty seconds later, there was a knock at the door.

Clearly, it could get worse.

Chapter Six

Ryan had to admit; this day would go down in the record books as one of his worst ever. He couldn’t seem to get his head wrapped around this account, and nothing he came up with was working. They had to win the Costas deal, otherwise Steinhem would crash and burn along with Ryan’s reputation as a top-notch sales and marketing consultant. H
e’d worn man
y hats over the years, but this time, this account, he just couldn’t seem to conquer. And soon, all those naysayers who said he was too young and too inexperienced to take over the company would be proven right. And maybe they
were
right. Maybe running the company was too much to take on. Plus, he liked the freedom of being constantly on the move, and if he took over the family business, he’d be stuck in one place for good. But he didn’t want to let his dad down either. Right now, he just needed a new idea, a spark of inspiration. Anything. But he was coming up empty.

When he walked back into the house after running out to pick up his Chinese take-out, Riley was howling up a storm in the bathroom. Ryan rushed toward him—and then stopped. Was that music coming through the walls? He lingered in the hallway and listened for a moment. It was Carrie, singing with Riley! If you could call that off-key yodeling
singing,
anyway. A wide grin split his face, and all the stress from his rotten day drained away.

And then his smile faded. Sometimes life threw you a curve ball, and you either did your best to catch it or you got the fuck out of the way. With this woman, he wasn’t sure yet which way he was going to roll. All he did know was that Celeste was wrong. He’d tried to form a relationship with Carrie. He liked her. He brought her flowers, offered to spend time getting to know her, and she’d thrown him out on his ear. He’d had it right the first time.

No attachments.

No commitments.

No distractions.

Get in, get out, and move on. He only hoped Carrie might be on board with that agenda. Maybe he could find a way to get past her new all-business attitude and through to that gorgeous, spontaneous stranger from the wedding, the one who’d been willing to have a one-night stand in a custodian’s closet. They could have a fling, a fun night or two—
after
he straightened out his professional life.

After a moment, he opened the door to the bathroom. Riley immediately stopped howling and jumped on him, greeting him with sloppy kisses. He’d hated leaving him locked up in the bathroom all day, and as it turned out, he hadn’t needed to. Riley hadn’t made a mess after all. He was truly a pretty cool dog. Ryan had to admit he was beginning to enjoy having him around. It was kind of nice not coming home to an empty house. And even nicer coming home to a little entertainment.

He considered saying something to Carrie through the wall, but then thought better of it. He put his take-out in the fridge for later, opened up his brief case, and pulled out the Costas file. He needed something fresh. New. Exciting. Something no one had seen or done before. He sat at the table, notebook at the ready, pen in his hand, reading and re-reading the same paragraph. He couldn’t focus. He couldn’t stop thinking about Carrie and Riley. This wasn’t good. He wanted to go over there and say hello. Tell her how much fun it was to hear her sing, make a joke, see her smile. But she hadn’t been smiling when he’d left her that morning. Somehow everything had gotten so off course. Yes, he totally screwed up. He shouldn’t have brought flowers at the same time he was asking for a favor. He knew better. He’d been looking for a quick way out, an easy solution to his problems, and it had exploded in his face.

Now he had to fix it or he’d never be able to stop thinking about her long enough to get any work done. He walked back over to Carrie’s door, hesitated for a brief second, and then rang the bell.

“I want to apologize,” he started as she yanked open the door.

“I can’t believe you locked poor Riley in the bathroom all day,” she countered, not hearing him. Her eyes blazed, and her hair was a wild Medusa mess on her head, and it was sexier than hell.

“Trust me,” he countered. “He didn’t mind. He hates being outside.”

“Not true! He hated being in the bathroom. He cried all day.”

“He did?” Ryan didn’t like the sound of that. His quick retort died on his lips. “I had no idea. I’m sorry. ”

The lines around her mouth softened.

“Listen,” he started. “This is all new to me. I’m learning as I go.”

She took a deep breath.

“If you could just forgive me for this morning, I never meant…”

“I’ll tell you what,” she interrupted. “I’ll keep him for you.”

He brightened. “You will?”

“Yes. But only temporarily until you find a doggy daycare or somewhere else to place him.”

“Really?” In that moment, he wanted nothing more than to sweep her off her feet and hug her tight. “
I appreciate it. I
’ll find somewhere right away. I promise.”

“All right, but until you do, we need to go shopping and buy him some supplies.”

“Shopping. Yes. Absolutely. Whatever you need. I’m buying.” He couldn’t believe his good luck.

She smirked.
“You’re darn right you are, so let’s get going.”

“Now?” He quickly ran through his previous plan of working late over a carton of Chinese takeout, and was about to tell her so when he kicked himself. He would not screw this up. How long could it take? “Yes, now. Great idea.”

Twenty minutes later they were parking the car at the local pet store. Riley, seeing where they were, started whining and pawing at the glass. Carrie grinned. “I think he’s been here before.”

“I’m sure he has.”

As soon as she opened the door, Riley scrambled across her, making his escape.

“Whoa, Riley. Hold on there,” Ryan called, leaning across Carrie as he grabbed the leash before it followed the dog out the door. He managed to stop Riley from bolting across the parking lot, but now Ryan was halfway across Carrie’s lap. The warmth of her body felt nice. It felt good.
Too good
. He looked up at her, a sheepish look on his face. “Sorry.”

“Why don’t I take that?” she said. She took the leash from his hand and righted her rumpled clothes as he sat back up.

“
Good idea.
” Distance. Yes, distance was good. Stay on task. Buy dog supplies, get back home, get to work. But damn she smelled good. “You ready for this?” he asked. Was he?

“Do I have a choice?”

He winked. “Not anymore.”

Riley barked and strained at the leash. “All right, we’re coming,” she called and got out of the car.

Ryan followed behind them as they walked into the store. He never would have guessed the two had met each other yesterday. They looked like they’d been friends for life. Finding a dog sitter that lived next door
was the answer to his prayers, even if it was only temporary. Hopefully by the time she called it quits, Celeste would be back. He pulled his gaze off of Carrie and the sexy sway of her hips and tried to focus. All they had to do was pick up a few things, get Carrie and Riley set up and situated, and then he could get back to the Costas account. The fact that he couldn’t come up with a campaign that worked kept gnawing at him.

As soon as they entered the store, Riley made a beeline for the small animal cages. He jumped up on his hind legs and pressed his nose against the glass, peering in at the guinea pigs.
Please don’t let him break the glass
, Ryan thought as he quickly grabbed a cart. He looked around him to see who might be watching—
everyone
. He shrugged his shoulders, gave an apologetic smile to one scowling woman, and then hurried toward them. He needn’t have bothered. Carrie patted Riley on the head and led him toward the toy aisle. Ryan pushed out a relieved breath and let himself slow to a more normal pace. The two disappeared around the corner, and he stopped to check out the dog food aisle. How much chow did Riley have left? Did he need to pick up some more? He dug back in his memory, trying to call up the brand Celeste was using.

“Clean up on aisle three,” came a nasally voice over the loud speaker. Ryan ran toward the toy aisle, almost afraid of what he might find, but everything wasn’t knocked on the floor and Carrie wasn’t buried under a heap of doggie doodads. In fact, she was grinning from ear to ear as she showed Riley the toys. Ryan’s breath caught in his throat. God, she was beautiful. She was taking such joy in pleasing the dog, she was practically glowing. This was a woman who liked to give to others, and knew how to enjoy a special moment—a true rarity. She looked up, caught his eyes and, for a second, he couldn’t think of anything else. She turned away, breaking the spell.

Obviously, he was out of sorts today. He just needed to focus. Keep his eye on the prize: win the Costas account, decide whether or not he would take over running Burton Consulting from his dad, and wrap up their next account. Riley was a small complication; Carrie was his solution to that problem. He needed to keep things in perspective. As he approached, she shoved a large stuffed hedgehog, a red rubber ball, and some kind of tug-of-war toy into his arms. Ryan dropped them into the cart even as Riley tried to take them from him.

“Let’s go look at the beds,” she announced.

Ryan looked at his watch. He wanted to tell her that Riley wouldn’t sleep on a bed, that he’d refused to and so far had only slept on Ryan’s bed or on the sofa, and hadn’t even touched the cushy dog pillow. But he didn’t want to say anything that might dissuade her from dog-sitting, so he let himself be pulled along in her wake. Two aisles later, Carrie pulled down the biggest, most expensive bed on the shelf and placed it on the floor. Riley jumped right in, his tail on a high-speed wag. “Of course, he loves it,” Ryan muttered.

Carrie rubbed Riley
’s head. “I knew you would love this one. It’s perfect for you.”

Riley barked in agreement.

Next she loaded the cart up with food and bowls and a water dish that constantly circulated the water.

“Does it have a filter on it?” Ryan asked sarcastically. This quick trip to pick up a few things was turning into a major ordeal.

She looked at him, her eyebrows raised. “You know, that’s a great idea. Let’s see if they have one.”

He took a deep breath, threw in the towel, and smiled. “Let’s.”

She took a step then stopped, looking around her. “
Wait.
”

“What?”

“Where’s Riley?”

He turned in horror to see the aisle was empty.

“Run!” They bolted, each going in a different direction. Ryan was terrified, but Carrie was laughing. They found Riley in the center aisle, his nose buried deep in a bin of stuffed dog toys as he rooted around for the perfect one. Brightly colored stuffed animals littered the floor at his feet. “Riley!”

He lifted his head and looked at them, a black and white cow stuffed between his teeth.

“Obviously, he wants that one,” Carrie said with a grin.

“
Then we
’d better get it.” He quickly picked up the mess, then they checked out, and a little while later were pulling into the driveway. Ryan had to admit, he was having a good time. Even if it had to come to an end. And soon. No matter how much he wanted to stay. Just the fact that he did was the number one reason he couldn’t. Regardless of how this account turned out, he was leaving soon. Either on to Malibu to train with his dad, or on to his next account. He’d have to be careful not to let casual become an attachment with this woman.

He carried the supplies into her house while she wrestled with Riley, who was more amped up than Ryan had ever seen him. Apparently his dog was having a good time, too.

“Okay, so where do you want this stuff?” he asked, thinking it was time to make a quick exit.

“Anywhere,” she called. “Come on, Riley.”

He looked around her model-perfect home. It didn’t look like it would accommodate children or pets, with its glass surfaces, sharp corners, and sparse, expensive designs. He set the bed down in the corner and thought of his place with its rental sofa, the bed and table, and the boxes he lived out of because it was so much easier than unpacking. The two of them were so different. She’d been there mere days and had already made this place a home. A place to stay. A place to settle into.

Not something he wanted. Ever. He carried the food and water bowls into the kitchen along with a bag of Riley’s favorite chow. “What a spoiled dog you are,” he told Riley, who was stuck to Carrie’s side like glue.

“Of course he’s spoiled. He should be, he deserves it.” She ruffled his head.

“Why?”

“Why what?” she asked.

“Why does he deserve it?”

“Look at that face,” she announced. “Have you ever seen anything more adorable? Let’s go see what new toys you have.”

Riley followed after her into the other room, completely smitten. Ryan could understand why, if he let himself be objective. She was a confident, warm woman who wasn’t afraid to take a challenge and face it head-on. Admirable traits. What’s more, she completely loved his dog. He was beginning to wonder if Celeste might have to fight her to get him back.