Hunting Witches (10 page)

Graham shrugged. “Can’t have you getting the wrong idea about our little town. So let me ask you a couple questions. How many people have you actually met around here? Anyone strange?”

“Sheriff, everybody has been strange,” Mark said.

“There’s a few in every crowd, Mr. Pendleton,” Graham said. “Have you possible made someone angry since you’ve been here? Accidentally or otherwise?”

Mark laughed and shook his head. “Yeah, it’s possible,” he said.

“We went out with some friends tonight,” Nika said.

“No,” Mark said. “Not friends. Friends don’t order all the cheap wine in the place then jump up on the table and whip out their schlongs.”

“He didn’t whip it out,” Nika said.

“He was going to!” Mark interjected. “He was going to pull out his penis and shove it into the tapenade.”

“Whoa, now!” Graham said. “Who did this?”

“I was getting to be friends with a girl named Sarah,” Nika said, “and she suggested we go on a double date with her and her husband.”

“Oooh, Doctor Mike!” Mark said, waving his hands. “He’s a dentist. This will be so much fun! Well, he’s a fucking loon is what he is.”

“You’re saying Doctor Mike tried to have sexual intercourse with the appetizers in public?” Graham had a difficult time erasing the image from his mind once it appeared.

“Well, I’m not sure he would have really done it,” Nika said, “but there was a threat of penetration, yes.”

“I couldn’t have someone behave like that in front of my wife,” Mark said, “so we left before he could bludgeon us with his weiner.”

“That’s a weird date,” Graham said. “Especially a first date.”

“So he’s probably mad at us,” Mark said.

“And Sarah’s been over for coffee, so she knows where we live,” Nika said. “Speaking of coffee…” She strode to the counter and got three mugs down from the counter.

“You take it black, Sheriff?” she asked.

“I do,” Mark said, grinning.

“Ease down, Paleface,” Nika scolded. “We have company.”

Graham smiled. “Black is fine, Miss Nika.”

Nika poured three cups of coffee and brought them over. It was strong, and light years beyond the office coffee Graham was used to drinking.

“All right, then. Doctor Mike and Sarah seem to be prime suspects. Anyone else you can think of? Anybody you work with who could be a problem?”

Mark shrugged. “No, work’s going great. Besides, I doubt anyone would drive all the way from Bell Plains to break a window.”

“You never know. If the want-to is bad enough, you’ll do whatever you see fit,” Graham said.

“I don’t think anyone else even knows where we live,” Nika said. “The cabbie. That’s about it.”

“It could be just a random thing. Some kids thinking the house is abandoned, out for some cheap thrills.”

“With our car sitting in the driveway?” Mark asked. “Doesn’t seem likely.”

“Well, right now, that brick is the key,” Graham said. “We’ll see if we can’t get a print off it. Run it through the system. See what we find.”

“White coats are here, Sheriff,” Deputy Moon radioed.

Graham set his coffee down on the counter. “I’m going to meet them out front, then while they’re doing their work, Deputy Moon and I will get your official statements. Paperwork. All that good stuff.”

Graham left through the back door, and Nika and Mark looked at each other, wondering what would happen next.

“You don’t really think Mike threw a brick through our window, do you?” Nika asked.

“I think he would have lobbed a couple of jizzwads in your wine glass if he could have,” Mark said. “That’s just one step away from vandalism.”

Graham came back in with Deputy Moon following closely behind.
“The white suits are going to vacuum your carpet,” Graham said. “They’ll need a hair sample from each of you, just to compare against. Is that a problem?”

Mark and Nika both shook their heads.

“Excuse us,” came a voice from behind Graham. Two men in police jackets came in with two briefcases and a small vacuum cleaner. Graham nodded at one of them, and pointed towards the living room.

“Other side of the, uh, sheet tent, in there,” Graham said to the white suits, who marched into the living room.

“How come they weren’t wearing white suits?” Nika asked.

“Oh, that’s just what we call them,” Deputy Moon said. “Sometimes, if there’s a biological hazard, they will wear the white suits.”

“That’s kind of disappointing,” said Nika. “I wanted to see that.”

The whine of the vacuum cleaner started, then died down about five minutes later. “Hey, Sheriff? You may want to take a look at this.”

Graham excused himself and walked into the living room. The white suit handed him a large plastic bag. “Here’s your brick. You may want to read it.”

Graham cocked an eyebrow, stared through the plastic at the brick and sighed.
Goddamn it
, he thought.
This is the last damned thing we need.

Written on the brick in black letters were three numbers: “13 26 27.”

“What is it?” Mark asked.

Graham lifted the bag and showed him. “Exhibit A,” he said.

“What’s written on it?” Nika asked. “Are those numbers?”

Graham nodded.

“What does it mean?” Nika asked.

“It’s a Bible reference,” Graham sighed.

“How do you know?”

“Don’t you folks watch television?” Graham asked. “When you get numbers, it’s always a Scripture reference. Just have to figure out which one.”

***

After the white suits left, Graham and Kevin stayed for a while to help Mark Pendleton put some thick plastic over the hole in his window. Pendleton proved to be an affable type with a good sense of humor. Strahan liked him right away.

“How long have you been sheriff around these parts?” Pendleton asked.

“Round about a year,” Graham said. “Kevin, pull that corner tighter.”

“Yes, sir,” Kevin said.

“How busy are you, normally?” Mark asked.

“I have hobbies,” Graham said. “Some days, no one needs us at all. But we’re here on the days when they do.”

“What about the numbers on the brick?” Mark asked.

“I can’t really comment on those until I do some more investigating,” Graham said.

“You play things sort of close to the vest, Sheriff. Why do I get the feeling there’s some weirder shit going on in Elders Keep than you’re willing to let on?”

Graham smiled. “Oh, son. You have no idea. But it’s really nothing to worry about.”

“Thanks, Sheriff. My window is reassured by your words.”

***

It was not a night where Graham wanted to go straight home. Nightlife in Elders Keep was pretty limited. He also had a reputation to uphold. A man in his position couldn’t be seen in a Bell Plains titty bar at two in the morning. Luckily, he didn’t have to do that.

There was only one hotel in town: The Highlander Resort. It was also the location of the only bar in the Keep that wasn’t a dive. The Nine Back was a respectable joint, and it didn’t hurt that the bartender had a crush on him.

Hell, who was he kidding? He had a thing for her, too. He probably would have moved things on to a higher level with her if he hadn’t become sheriff, if he hadn’t been carved up by one of his oldest friends, if they had been anywhere but here. The last thing a sweet girl like Shelly needed was to get sucked into his personal madness. It was hard enough dating a cop; he couldn’t imagine what it would be like dating the… what did Nance say… crux between good and evil for the entire town? Couldn’t he just have had Mommy issues?

The Nine Back had two entrances. He didn’t feel like going through the lobby, so he went directly into the bar through the parking lot entrance. As he thought, Shelly was cleaning things up behind the bar. Even at two in the morning, with terrible lighting, that girl was beautiful.

“Got any fresh coffee?” he asked.

She turned at the sound of his voice and smiled when she saw his face. Oh, that smile. It got him every time.

“I might be obliged to make some,” she said. “Anything for the Keep’s finest.”

Shelly was the only woman who could make Graham blush. She had strong server’s calves, an ass only recently discovered by gravity and the kind of breasts you hear about in Bob Seger songs. Her dirty blonde hair came down a little past her shoulders. Even behind her glasses, her green eyes always seemed to be smiling.

He sat at the bar while she filled the basket with coffee. She turned as it brewed. “Evenin’, Sheriff,” she said.

“Good evening, Citizen,” he replied, and she leaned over the bar to kiss him.

“Rough night?” she asked.

“A little vandalism, a little apocalyptic language,” he said. “No big deal.”

She touched his face below his right eye. “You look tired,” she said.

Graham shrugged. “A little, maybe,” he said. “I was hoping to get that coffee to go.”

“Oh, yeah?” Shelly asked. “To go where?”

“Your place, preferably,” he said. “My place looks like a tornado hit it.”

“So does mine,” she said.

“Yeah, but I don’t care if your place looks a mess.”

“Whatever,” she said.

“Besides, your idea of ‘messy’ and mine differ greatly.”

“All right, fine,” Shelly relented. “But next time you get a wild hair up your ass to escort a lady home, we’re going to your place. So prepare for it.”

She fished a foam cup and lid out from under the bar and poured some scalding hot coffee into it. “Give me five minutes,” she said. He nodded, blew the steam off of his coffee and enjoyed the view as she finished cleaning up.

***

Shelly owned a doublewide on the west side of town, only a couple miles away from the bar. She had gotten a good package deal for the land and the house, and it was one of the few things she had ever owned outright. Some people may have thought it silly to be so house-proud about a trailer, but it was hers, and what other people thought had never meant much to Shelly.

Graham pulled into the driveway a couple minutes after she arrived home. It wasn’t a matter of trying to be discreet. Secrets were hard to keep in a small town, and even the old men who hung around the counter at The Meal Worm gave Graham a hard time for not proposing yet. He wanted to. But every time he considered popping the question, he remembered his last conversation with Will Brackins, and seeing his wife, Sarah, in her favorite chair for the final time.

Not happening. Not to Shelly.

Once inside, there wasn’t a lot of conversation. There was a great rushing and removal of clothing. Graham had to be careful taking off his gun belt, but within seconds, they were naked and stumbling towards Shelly’s bedroom. For a moment, the events of the evening played through his mind and he was disturbed. But Shelly laid him down, cradling his head between her breasts, and then everything was all right.

***

The alarm on Graham’s phone went off at seven.

“You should take days off,” Shelly murmured.

“Doesn’t matter if I take them,” he grumbled. “I never get ‘em. Somebody always calls.”

“Go on and get in the shower, hon,” she said. “I’ll start some breakfast.”

He put his feet on the floor and sat for a second, waiting for the head-fog to lift. When it did, he followed his morning wood to the bathroom, where he pissed for what seemed like five minutes. He put the seat down, flushed, and started the shower.

Someday, he would remember to bring some his own toiletries to Shelly’s place. That seemed like a sign of commitment. Maybe that wouldn’t be so bad. But the real reason was because everyone around him could tell when he had spent the night with Shelly. He smelled like lavender, cocoa butter and lilac shaving cream. All that, and she used different laundry detergent and flowery fabric softener, and he spent the whole day smelling like her.

It made him not want to be at work.

He washed and shaved quickly, cut the water off and then dried off with one of Shelly’s insanely fluffy towels. He made sure to hang it up back up on the rack, even with the other one. It was like camping. Leave nothing but footprints.

He put on his uniform and walked into the kitchen. Shelly was loading eggs, toast and sausage links onto a plate.

“I think I owe you one of those cute pink razors,” he said, sitting down. “I used it on my face. Kinda tore it up.”

“I doubt that,” Shelly said. “My bush is at least as rough as your whiskers.”

“That,” Graham said, “is not true.”

“Well, I do use conditioner on it,” she said. “It’s supposed to help.”

Graham dipped a corner of his toast into the egg yolk. “I wasn’t complaining, Shell.”

“I’ll try to remember to pick up some man razors next time I’m at The Store,” she said. She fixed herself a plate and sat next to him.