Knowing Is Not Enough (22 page)

Tobey was ready for her. “I’m just saying, none of that. I don’t want you second-guessing my decision. It’s been made by the two people who should be making it. So, be happy for me.”

Linda, Karen, and I exchanged glances, wondering
where the defensiveness was coming from. We hadn’t said anything yet. I broke in with my two cents. “Look, you’re happy, and so are we.” I glanced at Karen and Linda. “Yes, I think our first thought was it’s soon to be moving in with him, but as long as you know what you’re doing we’re supporting you.”

Linda cut me a look.

“I’m not eighteen—it’s not too soon,” Tobey said.

We met each other’s eyes again, but didn’t say a disapproving word. Karen noted there were tons of people who dated their whole life and never make a commitment to one another. At least Tobey and Hunter were trying to be together.

Linda asked, “So are you thinking about getting married? Or just living together?”

“Living together for now—marriage isn’t off the table, but it’s too soon to talk about it,” Tobey responded.

I didn’t understand that logic. I had to ask, “Other than having the piece of paper, isn’t it basically the same thing as living together?”

Karen jumped in. “I don’t think so,” she barked.

I looked at her, amazed. “Why not? It’s the same to me.”

Linda, taking a drink of her coffee and said, “I think it is.”

Tobey appeared disappointed with Linda’s and my viewpoint. Her tendency to jump into things before thinking them through justified our hesitation. From my perspective, we had a healthy degree of concern, but I don’t think that came across to Tobey. All she heard was “it’s too soon.”

Disappointed but appreciative, Tobey said, “Look,
you, I know I haven’t always made the right decisions, neither have yawl I might add, but I’m in a good place. Hunter is the best man I’ve ever met. He wants to be with me, and I with him. So we’re taking a leap of faith, but I can’t do this without my girls’ blessing. So, give me your blessing, and let’s move on to Alex who thinks we don’t know she’s messing around with a married man.”

I almost choked. “Karen, you have a really big mouth,” I laughed.

“What did I do?” Karen replied, making a face.

“Tobey, we’re not going help you move—but we’re here when you need us,” Linda said.

“Didn’t nobody ask you to help us move. Hunter hired movers.” Tobey rolled her eyes, grinning.

“I’m liking Hunter already,” Linda confessed.

Just as our entrées arrived we put the subject of Tobey moving to rest, which meant I would be next in the hot seat. They were just pretending not to hear Tobey’s revelation. I needed some liquid courage and, after a couple of sips, I felt no pain. I was ready for ‘em.

Tobey got the ball rolling, so it was not more than fair for her to pick it back up. Before moving on to something new, she opened with something old.

“We never talked about you sleeping with Sanford.”

Karen lifted her head up from her chicken salad. Her eyes slowly widened. “What? You slept with Sanford?” The news stopped her from eating entirely.

“I thought I told you. I
did
tell you.”

Karen’s face looked riddled with confusion. “You sure?”

Linda, who continued to eat, said, “She told you.”

“No, I would’ve remembered that,” Karen said.

I raised my hands. “Okay, I slept with Sanford, but it was a long time ago now.” I turned to Karen. “I thought I told you. Sorry, I got so caught up and completely forgot.”

“Is that why Sanford left town? Did something happen between y’all?”

Karen seemed nervous, surprised, and upset at the same time. She’d finally continued eating her salad.

“It didn’t go the way Alex wanted it to go, that’s for sure,” Linda reported. As much as I was enjoying my pasta, Karen was still wrapped up in hearing the Sanford and I slept together story. I needed to explain myself.

“No, he didn’t leave because of me or anything I did—”

“That’s not true.” Linda interjected.

“It’s true. He got the grant—nothing to do with me.”

Tobey blurted, “Tell her the rest.”

“What rest?” I asked.

“The rest—do you want me to start you off?”

“You’re just happy ‘cause it’s my turn,” I said, chuckling.

“Yes, actually, now that you mention it, I am.”

I looked back over at Karen who returned to her frozen position with Linda dipping her fork into Karen’s plate. “Girl, eat your food,” I shrieked.

“Oh.” Karen snapped out of it in time to hit Linda’s fork with her own. “Get out of my plate.”

Linda laughed. “Oh, I thought you were done. What’s the name of that salad?”

“I don’t know—just a grilled chicken salad—don’t change the subject, what happened with Sanford? You didn’t like him? Sometimes friends don’t make good
lovers.”

I shook my head. “That wasn’t it. Just the opposite—I liked him a lot. I couldn’t have been more wrong about dating friends,” I admitted.

“You were all in before he left,” Tobey said.

I sighed, “Yeah, well it didn’t work out.”

“Tell her why,” Tobey added.

Linda, still intimately engaged with her food, managing to occasionally eat some of ours, too, said, “its not all Alex’s fault.”

“Thank you.” I said feeling a small sense of vindication. “Help me out—tell them it wasn’t me.”

“That’s as far as I go. Look, I am out of the house, no Mitch and no kids. I don’t care what’s going on. I am enjoying this for every minute I can.”

“I guess I’m on my own. Can I at least finish my food first?” I asked.

In perfect pitch they said, “No.”

I responded to Tobey. “Before he left I told him we should cool things off until he got back.”

Karen’s frown sunk lower. “Why would you say that?”

It was hard to explain what I didn’t understand myself. “I don’t know—fear—maybe? I know—I messed up big time. Some things can’t be fixed—I remember telling Jake that—now Sanford should’ve said that to me.”

Karen wants this for me. So much so she’s not giving up. “It can’t be that bad you went to see him.”

“That . . . really . . . didn’t go as planned either.”

Linda and Tobey followed our conversation. “After you texted I didn’t hear back from you. What happened?” Linda asked.

“Well I asked you about the girl—”

“Girl—what girl?” Tobey shouted.

“When I got there—the airport—Sanford had a girl with him. I thought she might be his girlfriend—”

“He’s got a girlfriend that fast,” Karen yelled.

“He said he’s dating her—she’s not his girlfriend. Besides, I broke things off with him. Sanford is my fault.”

“He was in love with you for so long—you had to know Alex,” Linda said.

“On some level—I guess I did. I honestly don’t want to talk about this anymore. It doesn’t matter now anyway.” I sighed. “He’s moved on and I’m starting to.”

Tobey asked, “What did the girl look like?”

“Now there’s the real story—she’s a model from New York—oh, she’s also English.”

“Are you serious?” Karen replied.

“I wish I wasn’t.”

“Was seriously pretty or oddly pretty?” Linda asked.

“No, she’s really pretty with the whole super model look.”

“Prettier than you? Oh wow, now that’s funny,” Tobey said.

“If you compare us—she’s a greyhound and I’m a Yorkie—both beautiful, but for very different reasons.”

Linda laughed. “Oh, honey.” She laughed some more. “I hoped you’d get a chance to talk, but with her there—”

“He talked, I listened. The gist of it is this—he’s not waiting for me anymore.”

“Waiting for what? You?” Karen asked.

“A bus—of course me.”

“Sorry—”

“And no, I didn’t know how he felt—Linda did, but I
had no clue.”

Tobey and Karen’s attention shifted in Linda’s direction. Linda defensively raised her hand. “Sanford called me before Alex and Jake divorced, wanting to talk about his feelings for Alex. He said he was in love with her—always had been. He couldn’t be the best friend anymore waiting and watching her with Jake. He considered moving away. That’s when he told me he applied for grants to work at other schools outside of Michigan.”

“That’s when you saw Jake with Taylor?” I asked.

Linda turned to face me. “Of all the restaurants in the city, they walked into ours. Sanford was right about something. Then you got mad at him—everything went downhill from there.”

“You didn’t know,” Tobey said facing me.

“What’s so hard to believe about that—I didn’t know.”

“Tell them about Easton,” Karen chimed in.

I turned and gave Karen a look. “In a minute,” I said.

“Oh, sorry. Maybe I need to get me another drink.”

“Maybe you should,” I echoed.

“Tell the story,” Linda said impatiently.

“Okay, so out of the blue Easton called me and asked me to lunch.”

“Okay, keep going. I didn’t know you gave him your number.” The restaurant thinned out. It would close soon.

“I didn’t—he got it on his own. It’s all pretty innocent right now. He came over after I got back from D.C. and spent the night,” I confessed. “But nothing happened,” I added quickly.

“So what
is
the situation at home?” Linda asked.

“He’s married.” I raised my hand to shield my eyes from the glares. “—but separated.”

“He getting a divorce?” asked Tobey.

Frowning I said, “I would assume so, don’t know. I haven’t asked.”

Linda blurted, “You haven’t asked?”

“So what’s the plan, Alex?” Tobey asked. “Just keep sleeping with this woman’s husband until he goes back to her?”

“Of course not,” I cried. “First and foremost, we are not having sex,” I clarified. “I already told you nothing happened.”

“So what are you doing?” Linda questioned.

“Not a whole lot. We’re getting to know each other. We’re
dating
? I’m trying really hard not to overthink this.”

“How can you
date
somebody that’s married? Isn’t that what Jake was doing with Taylor . . . dating?” Tobey’s voice dripped sarcasm.

“No, it’s cheating, when you’re married,” I said.

“Isn’t Easton married? As long as we’re clarifying,” Linda said.

Karen’s elbows hit the table while her hands held her heart shaped face.

She wasn’t in support of my budding relationship. I looked away from the table. “Yes . . . yes, he is.”

Linda paid for dinner, which made all of us happy. Just as we were wrapping up, Tobey’s ride came in. We congratulated Hunter and thanked him for keeping our girl healthy. Tobey, thirty pounds lighter, looked better than ever.

I walked Linda to her car while Karen pulled hers
around closer to the entrance and near Linda. We said our goodbyes and hugged. I pulled back to face Linda and rubbed her stomach. “Something you want to tell me?” I said.

She smacked my hand.

Linda smiled. “Go home,” she said.

The cocktails from the restaurant had wired me up. Buzzed and restless energy is not a good combination, not for someone like me. Normally, I would work or try to sleep it off, but no—not this time. I’m stepping outside myself—let go and let flow as it were. I text Easton and asked him if he was up. He texted back, saying he was. I told him I’d just got home from dinner with the girls and wanted some company.

He texted me back. “If the lady asks, she shall receive.”

I texted, “The lady is asking.”

His next note read. “I’m on my way.”

Oh my God! I can’t believe I did that . . .
now what? Okay, I need to get me something else to drink to keep my bravery going
. I went upstairs to take a shower. There is no way driving over here would take long. I hopped in and out, keeping my phone near just in case he called.

While dressing, I received a text. “You want something from the store?”

I messaged back, “More wine.”

“Okay, be there in a few.”

A short time later headlights reflected from outside in front of the house.

I looked in my closet, grabbed a robe and tied the belt around my waist. The silk caressed my naked skin. My body confessed what I didn’t want to—Easton was summoned to do more than keep me company.

“Were you in the bed when I texted?” I asked.

“Yeah—I mean, no—lying down, but I wasn’t asleep.” He walked into the kitchen pulling the contents of his bag out on the kitchen table.

“That’s not wine. You know how to make this?” I asked, pointing at the liquor mix.

“I think so. It should be mixed already.” Easton grabbed a couple of glasses out of the cabinet, ice cubes from the freezer, and poured us both a drink. The moonlight beamed through the blinds, lighting the room and revealing Easton’s silhouette. He was so beautiful to me.

I sat at the kitchen table. Easton joined me as we sipped our drinks—which weren’t half-bad, considering they came from a mix. I noticed he brought an overnight bag,
so I guess I’ll have a play date for tonight
.

“How was dinner with the girls?”

“Eventful is probably the best way to describe it,” I said.

“Meaning?”

“Hopefully you’ll get a chance to meet the crew, but whenever we have one of our dinners somebody is on the hot seat.”