Love Redeemed, Book 4 (10 page)

We engage
in a stare down. I will not waver. I’m sick of doubting myself and I certainly won’t tolerate being doubted by others. If Azmir wants me after all of my running, second-guessing, and mistrusting, then damn it, no one else can judge me!

“Understood, Ms.
Brimm. I guess time will determine all.” With a slight nod, she continues, “My best to you and your nuptials.”

I
know that’s as close as I’ll get to her approval. So I accept it, hoping it will begin a course to a warmer exchange between the two of us. I give Peg a firm nod and proceed to Azmir’s office door instead of waiting as she asked, feeling good about myself for finally standing up to Old Lady Peg. I, in fact, feel like I have a better understanding of her. Whether or not that feeling is mutual remains to be seen.

I enter the office with my eyes in search of A.D. in the massive room. I immediately
recognize the voice of a woman—actually two. My gaze finally lands in the conference area where Azmir is seated with Shayna and Dawn. My first inclination is panic, but considering my conversation with Peg and my new resolve of who I am in Azmir’s life, I refuse to coil.

I c
an tell the moment Azmir has processed my presence. His eyes slowly go into a priapic slant and he whispers my name, “
Brimm
...”

Azmir ri
ses from the table and meets me in the middle where he takes me at the small of my back and plants the most passionate kiss. It isn’t the most indecent; I know Azmir’s oral embraces now. There is one where he needs me, another where he misses me, and one where wants to
smash
and my clothes will be torn off momentarily. And then, there’s this one when he’s just…
happy
to see me.

Not too long ago
, I would’ve folded under the presence of Dawn Taylor. But today, I fold into his lush stature and let him smudge my lip-gloss.

“You’re a sight for sore eyes,” he murmur
s lazily. Then with his eyes squinted, he asks, “You okay?”

“Yes, of course I am,” I answer with
light incredulity. I don’t like to see him all worked up over me. I’ve caused enough trouble. “I’m bringing your pocket watch,” I murmur as I pull it from my white coat pocket. “I still can’t believe you left it behind. That’s not like you at all,” I admonish as I study the pocket watch while handing it over to him. “You’re known for this timepiece.”

Azmir
takes the watch and lets out a bellied chuckle, “Only by you, Brimm...only you,” he scoffs.

He looks adorable in his plaid business shirt
, wondrously fitted dress pants and matching tie. Without his suit jacket, his Prada belt—my favorite belt—is displayed. Azmir looks delicious as he always does, no matter what he’s wearing. My hands itch to caress the stubble on his beautiful face. He looks just edible, which brings me to the reality that is our surroundings, our mixed company.

I crane my neck
to see beyond Azmir. “Hello, Shayna. Hi, Dawn,” I greet the ladies who are still sitting with dozens of papers, folders, and pictures in front of them, on the small conference table.

“Hi, Rayna! How are ya?” Shayn
a returns.

I give her a courteous nod and notice Dawn on her phone. She gives me a brief wave, which lets me know that she is aware of my presence.

I
tentatively turn my gaze back to my handsome man in front of me. He’s too good to be true...and he’s mine. I feel my cheeks heating up and my face cracks into a full-on smile.

“I should go. I need to
grab a bite before my one thirty arrives,” I mutter.

“Wait,” he pull
s me into him more snug. “How was your doctor’s appointment?”

I didn’t expect Azmir to w
ant to make small talk while he’s in the middle of a business meeting, but there’s this austere look in his eyes that I can’t reject. I quickly decide to entertain him. “It was, for the most part, routine. I’m still healthy after your excessive usage,” I whisper in jest.

Azmir laugh
s again. My smile widens as a result. I’m experiencing his laugh more and more lately after all of these months of knowing him.

“So that’s it? She just examines you and that’s it?”

“Pretty much. We did chat about new...” I take a minute to readjust the volume of my voice. “…method of birth control. She’s sent me away with a bunch of brochures to help me decide.”

“Why would you need a new method? What’s wrong with
Yasmin
?” The concern in Azmir’s brown irises is palpable. What’s even more alarming is his knowledge of the brand of pills I take. I swear I have no privacy of person where this man is concerned. Now I’m clamming up. This is a personal topic and his associates are mere feet away.

“Nothing other than the burden of remembering to take them every day,” I sa
y quietly. His inquisitive gaze doesn’t falter. My eyes shoot over his company to find Dawn stealing glances our way. I know Azmir won’t drop this topic right now if I ask him to. I have to give him an answer, but it will be brief. “It’s just that I’m considering something a bit more long-term. I don’t wanna give us any surprises so soon into our nuptials.” I smile cautiously, trying to soften the tone of this conversation.

“You were a
surprise
. Running into you at the perfect time of my life was a great
surprise
,” Azmir murmurs as he pulls me into his tall frame, using both arms with mine caught between us. “A baby would be a welcomed
surprise
—hell, addition, just like you are.”

What in the hell?

Aghast, m
y eyes peer over to his waiting party to assess how much attention we’re drawing and if they’d in fact, heard Azmir’s crazy decree.
We are not having this conversation. He has not just spoken those words.

“A-Azmir…” I
’m at a loss for words. I’m waiting for him to throw me a bone by saying his comment was timed wrong or just plain ol’ crazy. But no. He stands there, waiting on me to continue. I sigh, resting my forehead on his chest.

“My, my, my! What are the lovebirds up to that have them whispering over there?” Dawn call
s over, thankfully shifting Azmir’s determined gaze from me.

That cat
ches both our attention and Azmir and I move our sights to Dawn at the table. Her crimson lips bear their usual smirk. I don’t know specifically what it is, but I’m sure she’s playing at something in that sinister head of hers.

Azmir d
oesn’t speak, but needing a cue, I do. “I was just letting Mr. Jacobs know that I’m preparing for the
Mauve
event. I have to pull together a glam squad to assist.” That wasn’t premeditated, but it sounds decent and right on time. My eyes go back to Azmir whose face is now fixed in a scowl and I’m sure it’s because I’ve begun a new conversation with a new partner and with such ease.

I br
eak from his embrace to end the baby addition conversation. His fixated glower doesn’t waver and I subconsciously wonder how I changed his disposition so quickly, in a matter of minutes.

Nice, Rayna!

Dawn perks up, turning her body towards us and even from a few feet away you c
an tell she’s hit with revelation. Dawn’s expressions always make you feel there are malicious thoughts or swindles regarding you going on behind her eyes. 

“Well, I do have the perfect
stylist for you!” Dawn announces spiritedly.

“Oh, yeah?”

I’m not short of stylist options. Being Azmir’s…now fiancée comes with said perks. But this lifestyle is still new to me, so I always keep an open mind. Plus, Dawn is in PR, she likely knows the “who-to-know” of the entertainment industry.

Azmir d
oesn’t join in on the conversation. He’s pensive, I’m sure mulling over our missed conversation about a baby. His eyes go between me and the area behind me. I manage the moment by not falling under his gape. I’ll easily cave in emotionally and again, we’re in mixed company.

“Yeah,” Dawn answer
s, going back to her writing pad and jotting down the contact info to the stylist she’s recommending. “She would love to hear from you. I’m sure she’ll work wonders with your physique, too.”

I d
on’t know how to take that comment. It’s recited with a snide tone, but with Dawn you never know. Since I’m already in hot water with the big guy, I decide to let the comment slide and take the info from Dawn’s proffered hand as I cross the room.

“Thanks,” I offer cautiously
.

Although we’
ve made a conjunct, yet silent agreement to be cordial, I don’t trust Dawn. I’ve only transferred her formidable presence in my mind, from
threat of losing Azmir to his Plan B
to
annoying lurking of my Clean-up Woman
. Either way, she isn’t to be ignored because she isn’t extraneous energy like Tara and her father. She’s a powerful ember force, just waiting to be reignited. 

My
eyes slowly leave Dawn and return to an anxious A.D., still reeling from our previous conversation. I walk into him and rest my hands on his chest messaging the desire to soothe his concernment. However my resolve, my actions are timid. As I tilt my head back to look him in the face, I mouth, “I love you.”

I
don’t believe the women behind me have any idea of what I just messaged him, but I know he feels my words by the way his eyes softens and he takes me at the small of my back again. He doesn’t reply to what I said, but exhales strongly, making it clear that my words have affected him.

“I have to go,” I murmur.

Azmir nods in assent, but in a flash, his face turns tight as his brows wrinkle. “I need to talk to you about something. Think we can chat after counseling on Wednesday, over dinner?”

I d
on’t know what to think about the impending topic, but quickly decide not to panic. That quickly, I choose peace over angst. I shake my head then realize a nod is more appropriate. “No problem. Any time you want. Sure.”

Azmir plant
s a gentle kiss on my forehead causing those trustee zaps to shoot through my body. I turn to walk away to ensure he doesn’t pick up on it. As I approach the door, I hear him call out, “Dinner in Redondo Beach with YS.”

That stop
s me in my tracks. I know immediately he’s referring to Thanksgiving dinner with Yazmine and Samantha. Azmir and I discussed a few days ago where we would spend our first Thanksgiving together. I’m perfectly content to have dinner alone at the marina and covertly expressed it. He mentioned Yazmine’s desire to have us over along with Samantha, but it didn’t sound definitive.
I guess it now is. Ughhhhhh!

“Perfect,” I muster
an ominous grin as I watch Azmir take his seat. “I’ll make the biggest and sweetest ham you’ve ever tasted!”

Azmir sp
its out the heartiest chuckle I have ever seen in public. I mean he’s tossing his head back and grabbing his abdomen in an all out laughter. My face cracks a mirthful smile.

I made the great A.D. laugh? Wow!

“Yeah, right! Yazmine would have you and your swine out on the curb before you could say, ‘
But my name is on the deed,’
” he belts out, as he’s unable to slow his humor.

At
that,
I
laugh as I make my way out of the door.

These darn black Muslims. Ain’t no pork ever hurt nobody!
I joke to myself, leaving Mr. Jacobs and his associates to their business.

~~~~~~~~~~

Azmir

I’ve just left a meeting with Petey, Kid, Santiaga, and Paulito, who both seemed impressed with Kid’s knowledge of trade. Santiaga and Paulito were of Mexican and Italian heritage, respectively, and were of a different breed than us. They weren’t ecstatic about my departure—hell, they were competitors in many markets and never met together. But I’d always been a unique individual. It had taken three years for me to get into the same room as Santiaga, and five for Paulito. They don’t meet low-level pushers. I had to prove myself and establish my reputation in the streets before they’d even acknowledged me. Sure, they’d known exactly who I was. They’d supplied to me for years. But it wasn’t until I annihilated my competition and started to request more stock that they’d considered breathing the same air as me in a room.

They understood taking over my competitors was no easy feat. There were men in the game longer than I’d been out of training shoes, but I was hungr
y…and clever. I knew how to steal their most valued soldiers right from underneath my competitors. And the ones that I couldn’t weren’t strong enough in numbers to go to war with my newly constructed militia. For two years, there was a blood bath in South Central L.A., some of which I organized, orchestrated, and eventually triumphed from.

I had to earn their respect and I did, which is the only reason why they agree
d to this sit-down and transition to Kid and Wop. They didn’t like it because they didn’t understand. In their world, businesses were of heritage and arrangements were not temporal. They were lifetime commitments that were passed down from generation to generation. You didn’t make it to the levels that I have and just walked away from it as if it no longer satisfied your passion. Again, because I’ve been so loyal and lucrative to them for so long, they respected my decision and even agreed to transition their transactions to Kid, with provision. That meant if Kid fucked up, it was his own ass.