Authors: Karolyn Cairns
Love.com
Love.com
A novel
By Karolyn Cairns
~Dedications~
~*~This book is dedicated with heartfelt thanks and affection to my own personal Ian the Unattainable. I hope he finds what he is looking for one day. I’m sincerely glad to give you the ending you so richly deserve, but can’t seem to find in life. Don’t ever lose hope or faith. Love will always find a way back to you.~*~
Copyright by Karolyn J. Cairns 2013
All Rights Reserved
Chapter One
Emily Walker looked like a deer that just smashed through the windshield of an oncoming semi-truck. She blinked as she stared in shock at the letter clutched in her trembling hand. Eyes blurred with tears. She crumpled it in her fist. She wiped at her eyes, the task of packing up her recently deceased husband’s belongings forgotten. The phone rang then, interrupting what thoughts she might have had with the letter’s news.
Emily
stumbled out of her bedroom, tripping over boxes on her way downstairs. She answered on the third ring, dreading this call as she saw the name on the caller ID
. Not now
! It was her boss.
Evan Stone could be counted upon to be thoughtless
in the best of times. He knew no better, even during one’s bereavement. He no doubt wished to inquire when she would be returning to work. The advertising executive she worked for didn’t fail to disappoint her with his lack of sensitivity. After seven years, he hadn’t lost his touch. His voice was booming with an annoying cheerfulness, misplaced given her current status as a widow.
“Yo,
Em. How’s thing’s been goin’?”
Emily ground her teeth and forced what she hoped was a pleasant tone. “Better
. Just packing up Eddie’s clothes for Goodwill. How are you, Evan?”
“Lost without you,
babe,” Evan admitted with a long sigh. “I know you have six weeks left of your leave, but I need ya back here fast. We got a big account coming our way. Stu is all over it, but he ain’t you, hon.”
The fact the senior account rep
at The Stone and Watterman Agency was an idiot wasn’t news to Emily. Stuart Stiles wormed his way into getting promoted ahead of her, but was hopelessly inept at the job. Emily was used to covering for Stu since his recent advancement. Emily forced back the bitter anger to know she deserved the promotion more than him. Evan was humming in her ear then. She could imagine him reading his email as he waited for her reply.
True, she’d been gone nearly six months.
When Eddie was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer the year before, she exhausted all of her vacation time caring for him while he went through chemo. The terminal diagnosis from his oncologist seven months prior prompted her to use Family Medical Leave to care for him.
Eddie wanted to die at home
; he’d told her tearfully. When Dr. Hayes gave them the grim prognosis, his brown eyes melted her heart and resistance to becoming his caregiver. She agreed and took on the responsibility of caring for her ailing husband; despite her reservations she was equipped for the task. Those words, ‘till death do us part’, prompted her to give into his last request. She brushed a stray tear from her cheek, forced back into the present by the annoyed sigh on the other end of the phone.
“Did you hear me, Em?”
“Yeah, I heard you.” Emily swallowed the bitterness she felt at that moment. Even Evan seemed to kick her when she was down. “I’ll be back on Monday. That’s the best I can do. Think you can handle it for another week?”
“That’s my girl
. Best thing for you right now is to get back to work,” her boss said in a pleased tone. “I’ll see ya first thing on Monday. Be ready to hit the ground running. This new client could put us into the big time.”
“Who
’s the client?”
“Ever hear of Amb
idor Industries?”
Emily’s
gray-blue eyes widened. Who hadn’t heard of the largest pharmaceutical corporation in the world? They were a big fish for any advertising agency to catch. No wonder Evan cut short her leave to bring her back. She could only assume he felt overwhelmed to land Ambidor with only Stu on it. “I thought they had a big New York agency representing them?”
“With all that hoopla over that drug fiasco with the FDA, they have PR problems now,” Evan explained in his matter-of-fact way. “They want to go with a smaller ad
agency to promote their image as a people-friendly company instead of a huge, freaking, corporate monster.”
“But why us? I guess I don’t get it.”
Emily knew the ‘hoopla’ had been all over the news, cost the large drug conglomerate serious losses, and had most people questioning the drugs they now took. Hundreds died when a new anti-depression drug was released too soon. The approval was given by a FDA official speculated to have been bought off by Ambidor to approve it before testing trials were verified. Yeah, they had PR problems alright, brought on by their own greed, she thought privately.
Evan made a disgusted noise
in her ear. “Because we’re still the best ad agency on the west coast, babe. That’s why. The Stone Watterman Agency has always had a good rep with our clients, good numbers, and we have the best PR in the country.”
Emily felt foolish for questioning why Ambidor would choose
their agency now. Of course they needed to revamp their damaged image. People were now getting leery of the drugs they took, asking questions, and driving down sales. Big corporations like Ambidor were regarded with suspicion now. The economy was shaky after the housing market crash and the auto industry going bust. A monster corporation like Ambidor going under spelled disaster. It made sense.
“I’ll get right on it first thing Monday, Evan.”
“That’s the spirit, babe,” he replied, relief evident in his tone. “I’m sorry about Ernie, Em. Tough break.”
Emily smiled without humor, not bothering to correct him
for forgetting her dead husband’s name. Ernie was closer than his previous attempts in the past. “It gets better every day. Thanks for the plant you sent to the funeral home. It was lovely.”
“Uh…yeah
… I’m glad you liked it.” Evan betrayed himself in his confused reaction. It was obvious he had no idea what his secretary, Janice, sent to her in condolence. “We all felt pretty bad for you, Em. Coming back to work is just what you need right now. Gotta be getting low on cash? I’ll tell ya what…there’s a pay raise in it for ya if we land Ambidor.”
Emily felt her anger simmering
, but forced it back. The fact her company refused to allow her to work at home during her husband’s illness precipitated her need to take the leave of absence; albeit an unpaid one. Whatever savings they had were depleted to pay the bills. Eddie’s insurance policy paid off the unpaid hospital bills and the house, thank God. To say she wasn’t broke now was an understatement. She had less than four hundred dollars in her checking account. Not enough to live on for six more weeks.
“See you Monday, Evan,” Emily murmured
softly, eyes filling with tears again.
“See
ya then, babe.”
Emily heard the phone click abruptly
in her ear, ending the connection. She held the cordless receiver for a time before she replaced the handset, looking around the modest two bedroom house with a sigh. Bins and boxes were everywhere. Eddie was a packrat. Her husband of nine years had a habit of bringing home anything he deemed useful.
A construction worker by trade,
Eddie Walker could never pass by a yard sale without stopping or pick up some treasure he saw in the junk at the end of the road. She had a week to clean out the house. She returned to her bedroom, eyeing the letter crumpled on the carpet. The rage that soon glimmered in her eyes grew as she bent to pick it up.
The fact she found it at all only attested to her husband’s determination to beat the disease. Eddie didn’t believe he would
die, she reasoned, or he would have never left the letter for her to find. Had he cared? Towards the end only his pain meds were what he looked forward to. She refused to give into the sadness once more, but it crept into every recess of her heart at that moment.
Was leaving the letter behind his way of telling her the truth? Emily bit her lip and fought the urge to let loose a torrent of pitiful sobs. She balled the letter up and tossed it into a nearby trash bag. She stared unseeingly at the mountain of plaid work shirts on her bed, her hands moving with robot-like efficiency to finish the task.
When the last shirt was in the plastic bin, she covered it with a matching lid and used the Sharpie marker to label it. She pushed it onto the floor and sat on the edge of her bed, refusing to meet her own gaze in the mirror above the dresser opposite her. That wounded expression mocked her intention to put such shocking news behind her. Something told her it would be a long time before she got over this.
~
~ ~
“What an asshole!” Emily’s best friend Joan
Stein shook her head, her pretty face set in an angry mime. “Your boss is seriously lacking sensitivity! Where does he get off demanding you come back to work? You’re not ready!”
Emily poured them both another glass of
white wine as they stood at her kitchen counter. “I’m broke, Joanie. I have to go back. Even if Evan went about it the wrong way; he’s right.”
Joan’s brown eyes filled with compassion. “If you need a loan
, Em—“
“No!” Emily cut her off and bit her lip from the too-quick reply. “I’m
going to be fine; just need to get back to work. I appreciate the offer, but I don’t need any money from you.”
Joan looked at her and shook her head, her curly brown bob dancing around her face.
She leaned against the counter, her petite figure looking fabulous in the purple plush sweat suit. “No, you’re not fine at all, Em. You just lost your husband! The last thing you need to do is go back to work.”
“I need the money, Joan,” Em replied
with a depressive sigh and shrugged. “I’m totally wiped out. If not for Eddie’s insurance paying off the house; I would have lost it. Luckily, my car is paid off. I have to go back to work while I still have a job to go back to. Trust me, the fact that Evan called me personally, tells me he was considering letting me go if I refused.”
Joan rolled her eyes. “If he had
fired you, we’d get you the best attorney in town and sue his ass!”
“Maybe this new project will take my mind off things, Joanie?” Emily avoided her friend’s perceptive glance. “This last year has been a rough one.
I need a distraction right now.”
Joan didn’t reply, staring at the mountain of
plastic bins in the dining room. “Damn Eddie! Damn him for dying on you! Why did this have to happen?”
Emily said nothing, sipping her wine, her eyes
deliberately devoid of expression. She mentally damned her husband for another reason, but refused to speak of it. Not speaking of it made it not true. Her marriage wouldn’t be a total lie; her sacrifice for her beloved husband made in vain. The mocking voice in her head chuckled at her thoughts.
Don’t think about it.
Emily sipped her wine, waiting for the pain to recede. Joan began to chatter on until she noticed her lack of attention. Her friend glared at her.
