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Authors: Leigh Hobbs

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Sir Cecil was always ready for a chat.

‘Good evening, Sir Cecil – and how are we tonight, Lady Celia?' said Mr Badger as the Smothers-Carrutherses were escorted to their VIP table. It was a well-kept secret, but Sir Cecil and Lady Celia weren't interested in stamps at all; nonetheless, they were honoured to be patrons, and never missed a dinner. Especially as the Boubles Grand Hotel was like a second home to the Philatelic Society.

Upstairs in the Royal Suite, the Duchess had also been very busy. She'd insisted on ordering every last luxury that the hotel could offer, all the while never once removing her dark glasses.

Meanwhile, downstairs, the kitchen was still on red alert, as her grace hadn't stopped eating since she'd arrived.

Now, though, with the sun going down and the lights outside going on, the Duchess was getting bored in her Royal Suite.

There was nothing of interest on any of the televisions, so her grace made yet another call to room service.

‘Send up the bellboys with my sedan chair,' she said. ‘I wish to go downstairs.'

CHAPTER 8

An Unexpected
Entrance

In the Boubles Grand Hotel Ballroom, a speech had been made by the President of the Philatelic Society and the stamp-collectors were enjoying their dinner, exchanging sensational stamp stories and swapping feverishly. Mr Badger had turned the air-conditioning off so as not to cause the guests discomfort, just in case the breeze ruffled the pages of their precious albums and unhinged the contents.

Suddenly, a hush fell upon the room and all eyes turned towards an extraordinarily tall figure with a curled lip wearing sunglasses standing at the doorway. The Duchess had arrived, unannounced. She was on the lookout for some excitement.

‘Who
is
that?' said Lady Celia to Mr Badger, who had just brought her a special cup of tea.

‘Her grace, the Duchess de la Dodo,' replied Mr Badger.

‘Never heard of her,' snapped Lady Celia as she squinted at the Duchess, adjusting her glasses. ‘I can't put my finger on it, but there
is
something familiar about her. Dreadful manners, I must say, wearing sunglasses indoors. A very nice fur she is wearing, though – it reminds me of one I used to wear. Hmmm, and the shoes, too.'

Mr Badger and Miss Pims watched as the Duchess, spotting an uneaten raspberry-meringue pie with pineapple coulis, set off towards the sweets trolley.

Clomp
,
clomp
,
clomp
went her feet as she strode into the room. Despite those long, long legs, Mr Badger noticed that the Duchess did not move very gracefully.

If it hadn't have been for Mr Badger's quick thinking, what happened next would have made the morning newspapers, if not the
International
Philatelic News
. For, with a dreadful squeak and then a shriek, the Duchess de la Dodo slipped on the beautifully re-polished Boubles Grand Hotel Ballroom floor.

Gasping in astonishment, the stamp-collectors looked up as the Duchess became airborne, her extra-long legs flailing above their heads. Her arms flapped about like a great big bird, fanning hats off heads and menus off tables. Most distressing of all, stamps flew everywhere as she struggled to steady herself.

The guests were momentarily stunned into silence. Then the crowd screamed as one as the Duchess – who they only knew as a very tall woman – lurched back mid-air, right into the newly restored Boubles Grand Hotel chandelier.

BOOK: Mr. Badger and the Difficult Duchess
5.56Mb size Format: txt, pdf, ePub
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