Ray of Love (Lifestyle by Design Book 3) (10 page)

She heard the beep and left a pleading message. "Ray, I'm so sorry. I didn't mean what I said. Please call me. Please?"

She allowed herself another minute of pathetic weeping before she sat up and squared her shoulders.

She had a lot of thinking to do. But this time, it was to plan how she could get Ray to forgive her and take her back.

She just pushed away the best thing that had ever happened to her. She'd hurt him, demeaned their relationship and made him think he meant nothing to her. The worst part was he thought she was okay with sleeping around with other men. Oh, that was bad. Real, real bad.

She knew she had an uphill battle making him believe her again. But she would do everything she could. She had just realised how much she was in love with him.

CHAPTER NINE

"Kane! You're back!" Faye cried as she ran to the handsome, dark-haired man that appeared in her mum's kitchen.

"Sure looks like it," her oldest brother said with a grin.

She smiled at him fondly and gave him a bear hug. Kane lifted her off the floor and squeezed her tightly.

"How was Dubai? How are you?" she asked.

"Dubai was good but I'm ecstatic to be back. Six months is a long time to be away from home."

"We missed you, too." She gave her architect brother another hug.

"Hey, I was told we were having your special cherry cheesecake for dessert. I should have a bigger piece than the rest of you, as this family gathering is because of me."

Faye's face fell. She bit her lip and looked at her brother in contrition.

"What? They finished it off already and you didn't leave some for me?" he bellowed. "We haven't even had lunch yet."

"No. We're not having any. I didn't get the time to go shopping for ingredients and I had to be here to help Mum cook. Sorry."

"Faye! You know your cheesecake's one of the main things I look forward to when I come home. And I've been away for six months," he whinged.

"I'll make it some other time," she said consolingly.

"Is lunch ready soon, Mum?" Kane asked their mother, who followed him into the kitchen.

"In about thirty minutes. Your brothers and your dad are in the games room playing pool."

"Well, that'll be enough time for me to get what Faye needs for her cheesecake, won't it?" Turning to Faye, he added, "Maybe you could make it after lunch? We can have it for dessert tonight."

Faye chuckled. The whole family knew Kane was addicted to her desserts, especially her special cherry cheesecake.

"Okay then, you can go buy the ingredients," she responded. "I'll write them down for you. Just get back here quickly."

"Good. I'll say hello to the boys first, then I'll head out. I've been salivating for that cake for months. There's no way I'm not having it today."

"You could just learn how to make it yourself," she called as Kane strutted to the games room.

Her brother simply roared in laughter at her suggestion.

"I'm ever so glad that as my only daughter you love to cook as much as I do, darling," her mum said to her.

"Maybe I got all the cooking genes, Mum."

Her mother beamed at her.

Out of her four brothers, Kane was the worst in the kitchen. He couldn't even fry an egg. Only Dylan, the second oldest, had developed some reasonable cooking skills. Her younger twin brothers, Riley and Bradley, weren't much better than Kane although, at least they could cook eggs.

She suddenly remembered that Riley had taken some Thai ingredients from her pantry a couple of weeks ago. She must remember to ask him if he'd been trying to improve his culinary skills.

The memory brought Ray back into her consciousness. Not that she'd stop thinking about him since that morning. Kane's arrival just distracted her for a short while.

"Faye," her mum said, eyeing her speculatively. "I noticed you haven't been very lively today. Is anything wrong?"

She sighed. "I've been really stupid, Mum."

Faye was wiping away a tear that escaped when Kane walked back into the kitchen, followed by Dylan.

"What's wrong?" the two brothers asked with concern.

Faye gave them the semblance of a smile. "Nothing."

"Bullshit, Faye," Dylan growled. "Don't give us that. You hardly ever cry. Now what the hell is wrong? It's a guy, isn't it?"

"Is it Steve?" Kane asked ominously.

This time, Faye's smile was genuine. All four of her brothers were protective of her, but Kane and Dylan, being the older ones, sometimes went overboard with it. Their dad had drummed it in their heads to be so when they were little. '
You boys all have to look after Faye. She's your only sister.'

Having four brothers treating you like porcelain could be very smothering, no matter how well-meaning they were. She learned how to be assertive, bold and direct in telling them she could look after herself. By the time she went to university, she had proven to them she didn't need their overprotection. She still loved it when they showed they cared, of course.

"Well?" Kane pressed.

She exhaled loudly. "It is a guy but it's not Steve."

"Oh? You're seeing a new guy and we don't know about it?"

"Hey, you don't need to know each and every single guy I go out with, you know."

"No, only the serious ones you date. If this guy has made you cry, it must be serious."

To her brothers' and mother's horror, she started to sob softly.

"Oh, darling," her mum crooned, leading her to a breakfast stool.

"What's the fucker done?" Dylan demanded.

"Don't call him that!" Faye glared at her brother.

"Well, what's his name, then?" Dylan asked derisively.

"Ray," she said softly.

"So, what's
Ray
done?"

"Nothing. It's what I've done."

Her family looked at her with bemusement.

"I pushed him away. Now he probably hates me," she continued in a low voice.

"What do you mean?" Kane quizzed.

She recounted her morning's conversation with Ray with as much accuracy as she could remember.

"Let me get this straight," Dylan said. "He found out you're meeting Steve tonight. He wasn't happy with that and demanded you not to see him. Then you told him he had no right to make demands like that because you're not in serious territory yet. In fact, you can still continue dating other people."

"Yes."

"If he likes you, I can see why he'd be upset. But why are
you
so upset?"

"Did he become violent towards you or something?" Kane asked menacingly.

"No! Don't be ridiculous, Kane."

"Then what, Faye?"

"I love him!"

Her mum jumped in. "So you told him you still want to be free to continue seeing other people even though you love him?"

"Yes!" she cried in frustration. "I'm the world's biggest idiot!"

"Why the hell would you tell a guy all those things if you love him?" Dylan asked in total bewilderment.

"I just told you. I'm an idiot!"

"You're not an idiot, Faye," her mum asserted as she gave her tissues, then went back to the stove to stir her dish before it burned.

Faye stood up to help her but she was shooed away. She sat back down on the stool.

"I thought I wanted to take things slow emotionally," she explained. "We've only been going out for three weeks. In the past, I'd fallen in love with guys in less time than that, only to find out that my feelings for them weren't strong enough for something more permanent. I just thought playing it casual for a while was a good idea. I didn't expect my reaction when he walked out of my apartment."

"So what are you going to do?"

"Get him back. Can you give me tips? If you were in his shoes, what would make you want to talk to me again?" she implored her brothers.

"Was he really angry?" Kane asked.

"He wasn't shouting at me or anything. He was deadly quiet when he said if that was what I wanted then he couldn't be with me."

"It's obvious he likes you."

"I hope so. I'm hoping his feelings are strong enough to want me back even after what I've said."

"Remember you've only known him for three weeks, Faye. Do what you have to do but don't expect too much."

"I've known him for a couple of years now. He even asked me out early last year."

"Oh. You didn't like him then?"

"I kind of did but I had just met Steve back then."

Kane let out a whistle. "And he knew this was the same Steve you're meeting tonight?"

She nodded, biting her lip.

"Ouch."

"Yeah," Dylan agreed. "You need to do something really special to make him know it's him you want and not Steve."

"Maybe you can feed him your cherry cheesecake," Kane quipped.

"I already did."

"And he still broke up with you?" Kane uttered in disbelief. "I'm sorry, Faye, but it looks like you hurt him real bad."

A new wave of anguish enveloped her and tears started falling afresh. What could she do? A thought hit her and she bolted from her seat to get her mobile phone from her handbag.

"I need to cancel my catch-up with Steve, Lisa and Pete tonight."

"Hey, maybe you shouldn't," Dylan said.

"But Ray doesn't want me to see Steve."

"Just hear me out. Why don't you give yourself some time before contacting Ray? At least have dinner with Steve tonight and see whether what you thought you felt about Ray changes in the morning. As you said, you tend to 'fall in love' so readily, only to find out it wasn't strong enough for something more long term."

Faye looked at her brother. Every single cell of her body was pleading with her to go to Ray and comfort him and tell him she loved him. But what Dylan said made sense.

"Okay. I guess that's a good idea."

*******

Steve was sitting by himself at their table when Faye arrived at the restaurant. His face lit up like a lantern when he saw her.

"Hi," she said with a polite smile as they greeted each other with a kiss on the cheek.

"Hi. You look as gorgeous as ever, Faye."

"Thanks, Steve. You don't look too bad yourself. You haven't changed."

"Well, it's only been a few months you know," he said as he pulled out her chair for her. "Pete texted me. They're running a few minutes late. Apparently their son wouldn't settle and they didn't want to leave him until he'd stopped crying."

"Oh, they're not bringing Aaron with them?"

"No," Steve chuckled. "I think they wanted a bit of a break. Lisa's mum is there to look after Aaron."

A server approached and they ordered drinks while they waited for their friends.

"So how've you been?" Steve asked.

"Same old," she answered. "Work's good but busy. How's your new job?"

"It's what I expected. It's pretty full on and I'm travelling most of the time. I'm hardly ever home in Adelaide."

She nodded as she watched Steve's familiar face. She became conscious of the discomfort she was feeling. It was odd. She'd always felt relaxed with Steve, even from the first moment they met.

"You know," he continued, his voice softening, "I thought I'd really enjoy this new job with its new challenges and responsibilities. But I found out I just thought the grass was greener on the other side. Of course, when I got there, I realised that wasn't the case."

She looked at him in surprise. "You don't like your job?"

"It's not that I don't like it; it's more like it probably wasn't worth giving up everything I had here for it," he replied with a cautious look on his face.

"Why not?"

"Well, apart from the money, which is great, it's … it's a very lonely existence. I wondered what I was earning all that money for. I don't even have the time or a reason to spend it."

"Hey, at least you're working for your future financial security," she said with a wave of her hand in the air. She didn't know how else to respond to his confession.

He smiled at her, his stare intense and probing. "Yes. That's true. But I've been a fool, Faye. I was too career focused. I gave up one of the best things that's ever happened to me. You. Our relationship."

Faye's mouth opened in surprise.
Damn.

"I'm sorry," Steve said with a twist of his lips. "I didn't mean to spring this on you within the first five minutes of seeing you again. I guess being with you reminds me of how to be direct and upfront. You taught me how to be like that."

"Steve, I … this is so unexpected."

"I know. But since it's already come out of my mouth, what do you say, Faye? Would you give me another chance? Please?"

She gazed at him. This was a man she cared about for a year. Did she still have feelings for him? Did she want him back?

She took a deep breath and closed her eyes. Images of Ray filled the backs of her eyelids. Ray smiling, Ray in ecstasy, Ray frowning, Ray with that sad, hurt look.

She gasped as sharp pain hit her with that last picture. Whatever uncertainty she still had about her feelings evaporated. She was no longer in any doubt. She was in love with Ray. Truly and completely.

"They're here," she heard Steve say.

For a second she didn't know what he was talking about. She opened her eyes and awareness came back. Pete and Lisa had arrived.

Fortunately, the conversation during their meal centred around work and Aaron. As a mother and father to a nine-month-old boy, Lisa and Pete were like most first-time parents. They couldn't stop talking about their baby.

Faye was grateful when the couple announced they'd have to skip dessert to head back home, as Aaron hadn't been well and they wanted to get back to him as soon as possible. She needed to be alone with Steve again to answer his question. She wasn't looking forward to hurting him, but that couldn't be avoided. She wanted a future with a different man. She just hoped that man also wanted to have a future with her.

"We're really sorry we have to run," Lisa apologised as she checked her phone for the tenth time to see if there were any messages from her mum, who was playing babysitter.

"No problem, guys," Steve said.

Faye smiled comfortingly at the concerned mother.

"Why don't the two of you come over to our place next time?" Pete suggested. "That way we don't have to cut short our conversations and you can also see Aaron."