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Authors: Jennifer Beckstrand

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BOOK: Rebecca's Rose
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His mom didn’t reply, just giving him that sad sort of pitiful look that usually buried him in guilt. But today the anger won out, and he couldn’t muster an ounce of remorse.

Beth tried to smooth things over, as usual. “He’s not even our real dad, Levi. He doesn’t have the same obligation to us.”

Levi stretched out his arm and leaned against the wall. “He raised us since we were little. He adopted us. I think that’s enough to expect something from him.”

“It is,” Beth said, lowering her eyes. “But lots of kids support themselves through college. I can do it.”

Levi frowned in disgust. “With what? We were both cleaned out, trying to make the house payment. You can barely afford a cell phone.”

“I could live at home and go to the community college. It’s cheap.”

“And forget about Northwestern?”

“It will be okay,” Beth said, even though tears brimmed her eyes.

Levi sat on the arm of the ancient overstuffed chair and brushed his hand over his face. He thought of his plump little
mammi
with the laugh that could cheer up the dead of winter. “Mom, have you asked your family for help?”

Deflated, Mom plopped next to Beth and threaded her fingers together. “I wrote to them right before we lost the house. Counseling seemed to be helping all of us. We needed therapy more than we needed a house.”

“They wouldn’t help?” Levi said.

“They have shunned me for fifteen years. I didn’t expect they would.” She let out a long breath and put her hand over her face. “I never should have left.”

Levi bristled. It was a regret he’d heard from Mom a thousand times since Dad abandoned them.

I never should have left.
Oddly, Levi found himself wishing the same thing sometimes.

That was nonsense. Life was carefree for a seven-year-old Amish boy. It only got complicated once the boy grew up.

Levi rammed his hands into his pockets to avoid hitting the wall again. “Do they have to be so rigid about shunning?”

“It was my choice, Levi. They have to keep the church pure.”

“It seems to me they would practice Christian kindness to one of their own.”

Mom’s voice took on a scolding tone, one Levi rarely heard from her. “How can you say that, when they were so kind and forgiving after the accident?”

A sledgehammer to the chest couldn’t have hurt any worse. He stood and quickly retrieved his phone from the counter. “Every conversation comes back around to the accident, doesn’t it?”

More quickly than he could have guessed, his mother was by his side. She clutched his hand and refused to let him pull away. “I did not mean to make you feel guilty. The accident was over four years ago.” She grabbed his arms. “I hate to see how it haunts you. Please let go of it.”

Levi shoved the phone in his pocket and headed to the door. “I will let go of it, Mom. When God sees fit to bring that little girl back, I will.” He opened the door.

“Where are you going?”

“Don’t worry,” he said over his shoulder. “I’m not driving.” He bounded down the stairs of the apartment building.

I’m going out to get stinking drunk, Mom, because alcohol is the only thing that takes the edge off the pounding, relentless guilt. But don’t cry for me. By tomorrow morning I’ll have put on my happy face and no one will see anything but the cheerful and pleasant Levi Cooper. With a cement box around his heart.

Chapter Three

It took Levi a few minutes to spot Rebecca in the corner booth at the Cowtown Grill. The place was crowded, as usual, and he was a little late. His eyes passed right over her at first because she wasn’t wearing her Amish dress or kapp. She wore jeans and a light yellow T-shirt that accentuated the golden highlights in her hair. The effect was a halo surrounding her face. Her silky hair cascaded over her shoulders and down her back, almost to her waist. His fingers ached to play with it.

Surprised at his own reaction, Levi folded his arms across his chest. How could he even think about running his fingers through an Amish girl’s hair?

He smiled as she eyed her surroundings tentatively. Rebecca was one of those girls who didn’t need makeup to look beautiful—a nice bonus if you were Amish.

He shook his head. What was he doing here anyway? What in the world had compelled him to ask Rebecca for a date?

To make Tara jealous, what else?

He surveyed the crowd of college kids at the restaurant. One of Tara’s friends was bound to see Levi with Rebecca, and the news would get back to Tara before he ordered his first Coke.

Eyeing Rebecca again, he admitted that getting back at Tara wasn’t the only reason for the date.

Fascination and guilt warred with each other as he gazed at Rebecca. Fascination for a girl who represented a life he used to know—so long ago but so close in his memory…. And the ever-present guilt. Guilt for his part in the accident that had taken an Amish girl’s life.

That’s why he’d agreed to take Rebecca skiing. He felt like he had to make it up to the whole Amish community for something that happened to a random Amish girl four years ago. His guilty conscience got the better of him.

And yet, he knew this wasn’t entirely the reason either. Rebecca intrigued him. He might even say he was attracted to her, but not in the usual way. Most of the time, Levi didn’t even need to work up a sweat to persuade a girl to go out. He knew how good-looking he was, and girls practically lined up to be with him. In high school, they’d hung around outside the locker room after a game for the star football player.

No, Rebecca possessed an attractive innocence and reckless naïveté that Levi found oddly adorable. He was curious—that was all. Just wanted to see what going out with a girl like Rebecca would be like before he got back together with Tara. But no matter how things worked out with Tara, he’d still take Rebecca skiing. He didn’t intend to go back on his promise.

Rebecca pulled a sugar packet from the square dish at her table, ripped it open, and poured the sugar into her mouth.
She must be getting bored.
Levi stopped staring and dodged around the tables to his date.

Sliding into the booth, he smiled at her. “Hungry?”

Blushing, Rebecca hurriedly crumpled the empty sugar packet into a tiny ball and hid it in her fist. “You are late. I thought I would get started with the appetizers.”

“You look nice,” Levi said. He sincerely meant it.

Rebecca looked away and tucked a lock of hair behind her ear. “For a few dollars at the thrift store, it is easy to look like the average American teenager.”

Levi reached over and laid his hand lightly on Rebecca’s wrist. “How’s the arm, kid?”

She stared at his hand for a moment. “Sore and stiff. I should never have let you talk me into the shot. I could barely move my arm for three days.”

“Better than being dead, I always say.” He squeezed her hand and tugged her forward. Smoothing his fingers along the crisp white bandage around her elbow, he said, “Is the cut better? Are you watching for infection?”

She shifted in her seat but made no attempt to pull away from his touch. “It’s amazing how someone like you could have managed to do such a good job on the first aid.”

“I’ll have you know, I’m a highly trained Boy Scout. I got my First Aid merit badge,” he said.

A gum-chewing, ponytailed waitress came to the booth. She took one look at Levi and completely ignored Rebecca. Levi had seen it before. Girls were attracted to him, plain and simple. Rebecca was very lucky to be out with the best-looking guy in town, and she should appreciate it.

“What do you guys want?” the girl asked, staring at Levi. “We’ve got new flavors of lemonade. Raspberry, peach, mango, and passion fruit.”

“I will have a glass of water,” Rebecca said. “That is all.”

Levi looked up from his menu. “Don’t you want a burger or something?”

“I did not bring any money.”

“This is a date, remember? You bought an attractive new outfit for the occasion. I’ll pay for the dinner.”


Nae
, you won’t want to go out with me again if you have to pay my way for everything.”

“What kind of guy would I be? Only a flake lets the girl pay. How would it look, you sitting here with your glass of water while I’m pigging out?”

“You get a free drink if you order cheese fries,” the waitress said, as if this would solve all their problems.

Levi winked at her. “Thanks, but I think we’ll have two bacon cheeseburgers with onion rings and a couple of Cokes.”

The waitress wrote it down. “Do you want special sauce or—?”

Rebecca snatched Levi’s menu. “Did you just order for me?”

“Since you’re not going to order for yourself.”

She glared at him. “You cannot order for me. How do you know what I like? Maybe I am allergic to cheese or hate bacon. Why do you think you can take charge of my dinner?”

“I’m paying.”

Rebecca folded her arms and lifted her chin. “Then I’ll have water.”

Levi threw up his hands. “Okay, okay, I didn’t mean to offend you and all your ancestors. I want you to order whatever you’d like.”

Rebecca opened her mouth to say something.

“Except water. I forbid you to order water,” Levi said.

“Would it be all right with you if I ordered water
and
a pizza?”

“No, get a Coke or something.” She needed to put some meat on those bones.

“I can come back later if you need more time,” said the waitress, still friendly but glancing with concern at the roomful of crowded tables.

“I’ll have an eight-inch barbecue chicken pizza with a glass of water,” Rebecca said, daring Levi to contradict her.

Levi stifled a convulsion of laugher. “I want a bacon cheeseburger with onion rings and a Coke. And bring us an extra peach lemonade and an order of cheese fries in case she changes her mind.”

The waitress jotted down the order and sped off to another table.

Levi glanced at Rebecca. She sent daggers back at him.

“I hope you like peach,” he stammered. Why was she so irritated? Didn’t she recognize gallantry?

“Is this always your habit?” she said.

“What?”

“To think you know what I want better than I do and disregard my wishes.”

“How can this be a habit? This is our first date.”

“I mean, in general. You are used to getting your way, doing exactly what you want.”

Levi chuckled. “You’re psychoanalyzing me because I ordered cheese fries?”

“I do not know what that word means.”

“I’m not trying to get my own way or anything. I just thought you might like to try the cheese fries. They’ve got like three thousand calories a serving. They’re called a ‘heart attack on a plate.’”

Rebecca cracked a smile.

Levi nudged her foot under the table. “Hey, you get a free drink with the cheese fries. And you can have the lemonade without feeling guilt-ridden, because I technically don’t have to pay for it,” he said.

Some of the ice melted. “I would hate to see a perfectly good peach lemonade go to waste.”

“And you’ll feel terrible if the cheese fries don’t get eaten. I’m paying for those.”

Rebecca had a really cute smile when she showed it. “I know I shouldn’t give in.”

“Yet you feel powerless to resist.” She was on to him, but he didn’t care. He’d gotten his way.

In all his dating experiences, Levi had never seen a girl actually finish her meal. Tara ate like a bird, and the cheerleaders he’d dated in high school took a few bites of whatever they ordered and left the rest on their plates to be eaten by him once he tucked in his own food.

Rebecca was not one of those girls. She polished off her pizza, the peach and a mango lemonade, and more than half the cheese fries. She ate with impeccable manners but cleaned up an amazing amount of food. It was kind of cute, and he couldn’t help smiling at her enjoyment. He should have brought his camera to capture her expression, even though he knew she wouldn’t have appreciated it.

She caught him staring as she popped the last cheese fry into her mouth and lowered her eyes self-consciously.

“I told you you’d like them.”

She blushed. “It has been awhile since I ate out.”

“I thought Amish people loved to eat out. There are four or five buggies at that Denny’s across from the sporting goods store all the time.”

“My
mamm
doesn’t feel good most days, and I am not about to take my little brothers anywhere in public by myself.”

“That bad? How old are they?”

“Twelve and fourteen. Getting them to sit still is like trying to milk a bull—painful and impossible.”

“Any other Millers at home?”

“I have a younger sister, Linda Sue. She is almost seventeen. I cannot get her to do chores, but at least she doesn’t give me trouble like the boys do.”

“So your brothers are rambunctious.”

“I don’t know what rambunctious means, but if it explains why Max has almost been kicked out of school twice, I guess they are. I had to promise the teacher that I would sit in class with him every morning for two weeks before she agreed to let him stay. Ach, it is irritating.”

She hadn’t said anything about her dad. Was he dead? Levi didn’t ask. But he knew that there was no such thing as divorce in the Amish community. Levi envied the stability of the Amish family—the dad didn’t wake up one day and decide to abandon his wife and rip out his son’s heart because he “couldn’t stand to live like this anymore.”

“Hey, Levi.”

Levi looked up. Megan Donelly and Cassie Can’t-Remember-Her-Last-Name gave him the eye from across the room. Megan, in her characteristic short skirt, winked and smiled at him, while Cassie played with her hair and tried to look demure and available at the same time. He should have been happy to see them. They’d be sure to inform Tara that they’d seen him with a beautiful blond at the Cowtown Grill. But he wasn’t as pleased as he thought he’d be.

He glanced at Rebecca then waved back casually, hoping she didn’t make anything of if. He didn’t want to hurt her feelings.

Rebecca eyed the girls with apparent indifference before folding her arms and staring out the window.

Levi guzzled the rest of his Coke then thumped his glass on the table. “Okay, kid. I’ve got more excitement planned for the evening. Have you ever seen a movie?”

BOOK: Rebecca's Rose
6.52Mb size Format: txt, pdf, ePub
ads

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