Sleepover Girls on Safari (4 page)

I made Andy recite that weird little rhyme about liars again the other day. It goes: ‘Oh, what a tangled web we weave, when first we practise to deceive’. I don’t know who wrote it, but boy, that guy totally knew what he was talking about!!

Our safari trip started out as a treat. But when the neighbourhood tweetie birds woke me at dawn on Friday, I felt like our class outing was suddenly looming over me like an especially threatening nightmare.

Complicated worries went round my brain. What if we let something slip and Kirstin found
out what we were up to? She probably wouldn’t realise we were trying to help Emma. She’d just think we were trying to make a fool of her! Omigosh, I thought, this trip is going to be harder work than school!!

I was so nervous that I was up and washed and dressed before the twins even made a squeak.

On the way to school Mum literally threatened to tie me to the roof-rack if I didn’t calm down. “Calm DOWN, sweetie! You’re not going to miss the coach.”

“Mum, I’m totally calm!” I lied. “I’m just really excited. This is, like, the happiest day of my life.”

I cowered behind the school gate and took a deep breath. I’m happy happy happy, I told myself bravely. I must look happy happy happy.

And like an actor bounding out of the wings, I ran into the playground, waving and smiling brightly.

My old sleepover mates were there already, chatting incredibly animatedly to our two new members. Kirstin was wearing cool casuals,
just right for a day out, with a World Wildlife baseball cap perched on the back of her head. Poor Emma. She was proudly wearing a little top and combats, but they were in really eye-watering colours, like you only see on poisonous frogs. Plus she’d pulled her ponytail so tight it’s a wonder it hadn’t cut off her blood supply.

“Hi, guys,” I gushed. “Are we totally excited or what?”

Frankie rolled her eyes at me. “Oh, we’re beyond excited, Flissie. Way, way beyond.”

Rosie nudged her. “Behave.”

I gave Kirstin and Emma my most dazzling smile. “I was buzzing all night, weren’t you? I couldn’t sleep a wink.”

“Oh, I know what you mean,” said Emma at once.

“I slept like a log,” Kirstin grinned. “But I went to Africa last summer, where we slept outdoors in all sorts of conditions. Plus we camp in the Australian outback loads. Safaris are always fun, wherever you have them.”

Frankie was impressed. “You’ve been to Africa? You’re only our age.”

Kirstin pulled a face. “Mum and Dad are biologists. Right now we’re living in the outback, but they’re constantly dragging me all over the world.”

“I wish my parents took me to exotic locations,” Lyndz sighed.

“You wouldn’t have time for sleepovers,” Rosie pointed out.

“I would,” Lyndz giggled. “I’d take you all with me, and we’d have a fabulous sleepover at the Taj Mahal.”

“Now that IS a cool idea,” laughed Kirstin.

Wow, I thought. It might have been sticky at first but Operation Pretend Friend was working. It was more than working. It was going like a dream!

“Where do you go to school?” Frankie was asking Kirstin.

“I don’t,” grinned Kirstin. “I just hook up to the School of the Air.”

So it wasn’t called the Air School after all. Know-all Emma didn’t know as much as she liked to make out.

Mrs Weaver clapped her hands. “Quiet everyone. Yes, that includes you, Francesca.”

Frankie was still chatting to Kirstin so she didn’t hear. Lyndz smacked her bum with her baseball cap. Frankie swung round in surprise to see everyone looking at her. “Oops!” she giggled. “Looks like I pulled a Fliss. Sorry, Mrs Weaver. It’s just that Kirstin’s been on an actual safari in Africa. Plus she’s being educated on the Internet.”

Mrs Weaver was looking tired already and we weren’t even on the coach yet. “Perhaps she’d like to tell us about it another time. Now I want you all to make an orderly line by the coach.”

But Kenny had other ideas. “We’ve got to get the seat at the back,” she hissed. She started elbowing her way to the front. Her aggressive tactics worked and we managed to bag the sacred back seat.

“Emma! Emma! You and Kirstin grab the seat in front of us,” Frankie called. “Let’s keep all the Sleepover Club girls together.”

Emma forced a smile. “OK, Frankie, good idea!”

“Don’t overdo it, Spaceman!” I told Frankie.

“I’m an actress,” she said smugly. “I’m
playing the part of Emma’s loyal sleepover buddy.”

The coach started to move and everyone cheered.

“I really owe your mum,” Rosie whispered in my ear. “I’d be missing this if it wasn’t for her.”

Kirstin and Emma were taking it in turns to read each other bits of historical info from their booklets. Kirstin was impressed that she was going to see a real castle. “You’ve got so much history in this country,” she said.

“Aren’t all you Australians descended from criminals?” Danny McCloud asked rudely, obviously hoping to get a rise out of her.

She laughed. “That’s right! But you know what I’ll never understand? You dozy Poms sent your criminals to live in paradise, and you all stayed home in the rain. How weird is that?”

Everyone thought this was hilarious.

“She told you, Danny!” Ryan grinned.

Kirstin winked at me and went back to reading about Gawdy Castle. I don’t know how people can read in a coach, I don’t actually like coaches that much. Especially at the back. It’s well bumpy.

We were just halfway to the safari park when Martin Ainsley, this weedy new boy, threw up all over the boy who was sitting next to him.

Frankie clutched her nose. “That smells so-o rank!”

Kenny tried to see what was happening. “Urgh, it’s got yellow lumps,” she reported. “What on earth did Martin have for breakfast?”

“Don’t be gross.” I tried to pull her back on to her seat.

“I’m not gross. I’m taking a clinical interest. I’m going to be a doctor, remember?”

“Then maybe you should help clean it up,” Frankie suggested.

I’m really brave about sick since Mum had the twins, but I was still relieved when we finally saw the sign for Gawdy Park.

We drove along beside a high stone wall for what seemed like miles. Behind the wall were tall trees, some just coming into leaf. At last, behind the trees, we saw the weathered battlements of an ancient castle.

“Yikes, is this castle haunted? It sure looks haunted to me,” Kirstin said excitedly.

“It’s really just an old museum,” said Emma.
“Don’t expect too much.”

Kenny rolled her eyes. “The trouble with Emma is she’s SO boring,” she whispered.

“No imagination,” Frankie agreed. “A ghost could walk right past her picking its nose and she wouldn’t even notice.”

We drove through the gates and pulled into the huge car park.

The only disadvantage about sitting at the back is that you’re always last off. Plus Mrs Weaver slowed us down loads by making us listen to her long list of dos and don’ts. By the time we’d got out into the fresh air, Kenny was jiggling frantically up and down. “Oooh, I need a wee!”

“Have you seen the queue outside the loos?” Frankie moaned. “You’ll be waiting for ever. Can’t you hold on?”

“If you don’t mind it coming out of my ears,” Kenny said.

“I’m just worried you’ll find this really boring,” I heard Emma saying. “I mean you go to all these exciting places.”

“Are you kidding!” said Kirstin. “Do you know how many fourteenth-century castles
there are in Australia?” She made a zero with her finger and thumb.

“None?” guessed Emma.

“Exactly, none. This is a first for me.”

“But no one lives in the castle any more,” Emma said anxiously.

“You mean I won’t actually see knights in armour! Shame!” Kirstin punched Emma’s shoulder lightly. “Relax! Just being with you guys is the best treat.”

But I thought Emma was right to warn Kirstin not to expect too much. I stared around in bewilderment. “So where are all the animals?”

Emma gave a snort of laughter. “You surely didn’t expect to see them in the car park, you stupid—” She caught herself just in time. “I mean, you funny thing!” she said hastily.

I didn’t take it too personally. Emma had been a member of the Sleepover Club for less than three hours. She’d been half of the Gruesome Twosome for years. Being spiteful was such a habit, I don’t think she even knew she was doing it.

Kenny emerged from the loos at last and we all surged up the path to the massive gates
which separated the castle grounds from the actual safari park.

“It said in the booklet there’s a maze in the grounds,” said Kirstin excitedly. “I’ve always wanted to get lost in a maze.”

Danny tapped his forehead. “Strange girl. She wants to get lost.”

“You look worried,” Rosie whispered in my ear.

“I was just wishing everyone could get along together,” I whispered. “Like, why do we have to be Emma’s pretend friends? Why can’t we be her mates for real?”

Rosie smiled. “Even real mates don’t get on ALL the time!”

“That’s true,” I agreed. “Remember that time we—”

Just then a ranger in jeans and an orange Gawdy Park body warmer came round the corner, closely followed by an elephant.

Everyone gasped. Obviously we’d all seen elephants on TV. But nothing compares with actually meeting one face to face. I don’t know if you’ve ever seen an elephant close up, but they’re MASSIVE. This one’s legs were like
small trees and it had more wrinkles than my grandma.

Then I started going, “Oh, oh, oh!” I was so overexcited, they were truly the only words I could get out.

Between the tree-trunk legs of the enormous elephant I’d spotted four small, tottery, grey feet. My friends saw them at exactly the same moment.

“It’s got a baby!” I gasped. “Ohh, look at its darling ears!!”

“And that cute little trunk!” cooed Frankie.

“I want one!” said Lyndz.

“Don’t be stupid, what would you do with a trunk?” Kenny teased.

“I meant I want a baby elephant, idiot,” Lyndz told her.

“Watch her,” I told Kirstin. “Lyndz kidnapped a baby pig one time.”

“You never told me about that!” Kirstin said to Emma.

Emma blushed. “Didn’t I?”

“She’s probably used to Lyndz nicking animals, aren’t you, Emma?” I said quickly. “She’s a total klepto.”

“I AM not,” said Lyndz indignantly. “I’m a friend to Nature, that’s what I am.”

“Keep moving everyone!” Mrs Weaver told the class. “We’ve got an extremely tight schedule.”

“Those gates are awesome,” said Frankie as we finally stood waiting for the rangers to let us in.

“Why do they make them so big?” asked someone.

The park gates literally towered over us, making me feel like a little doll’s house doll.

“They have to stop the animals getting out,” Rosie said.

“What have they got in there? Dinosaurs?” asked Danny anxiously.

I felt excitement prickling in the pit of my stomach.

“In a few moments we’ll be going on a tour of the safari park in the estate Landrovers. You must stay inside the Landrover unless the ranger tells you otherwise. Is that understood?”

Everyone nodded dutifully.

“You may not open the windows and you may certainly not lean out, Danny McCloud!”
Mrs Weaver said sharply. “You must follow the ranger’s instructions at all times. Those are dangerous wild animals on the other side of those gates. They are not, repeat not, cuddly pets. In a few moments you’ll meet the rangers who’ll be taking us on our safari,” Mrs Weaver explained. “After lunch we’ll go on a tour of the castle and grounds.”

“Excellent! Wonder what’s for lunch?” said Kenny greedily.

Frankie went into victim mode. “I hope they’ve got stuff for vegetarians. It would be so-o unfair if they—”

But I never heard what Frankie thought would be so unfair, because at that moment the electric gates swung open and I heard the unmistakable, spine-tingling roar of a lion.

“Have you seen this humungous list of animals we’re supposed to spot?” Frankie waved a sheet of paper in my face. “I can’t BELIEVE how many types of animals there are. I think I’m going to fall off my bones with excitement if we see a lion!”

“That would be interesting,” grinned Kenny. “I wonder what Frankie would actually look like with no bones?” she said to herself.

As you can tell, Kenny has the WEIRDEST mind.

We’d been on safari for twenty minutes, and so far the animals were keeping well out of our
way. We tried to get ourselves in the right safari spirit but it’s not easy when you’re all squashed into a Gawdy Park Landrover.

When I say, “all” I mean all the Sleepover Club members, real and fake, plus, (GULP) Mrs Weaver. I know!! We weren’t too thrilled about that either. We were really depressed when she insisted on coming with us.

“We’ll look like teacher’s pets,” Frankie hissed.

“What’s wrong with that?” Emma hissed back.

Kenny gave her a withering look. “You’re actually a Martian, aren’t you, Emma. But don’t worry, you’ll soon learn our earthling ways!”

Emma sucked in her breath but whatever she was going to say, she quickly thought better of it.

The Landrover went on bumping its way up a long, steep hill.

When we reached the top, the ranger stopped, so we could see Gawdy Park spread out below like a crumpled green and brown bedspread. Microscopic animals were moving around in the distance. I couldn’t
exactly see what they were, but they could have been cows and I would have still been amazed.

The ranger pointed out some deer grazing down by the river. “And you might just be able to make out a herd of elephants among those trees,” he grinned.

“Why aren’t those other elephants with them?” Lyndz asked him.

“The mum and baby? The littl’un got an infection and the vet wants to keep an eye on her.”

“Poor thing!” gasped Lyndz. “I hope she’ll be all right.”

“I’m sure she’ll be fine,” said Mrs Weaver briskly. “So, Kirstin, is this anything like being on a real safari?”

We rolled our eyes at each other. Why are grown-ups so embarrassing? And how come they never know when they’re in the way?”

Going downhill in a Landrover is even more uncomfortable than going up. Every time we went over a bump, our heads literally whacked the roof!

“Yikes!” Rosie squeaked suddenly.

“Did you hurt your head?” I said sympathetically.

She was pink with excitement. “No, I just saw a lion!”

The Landrover braked just in time for us to see the huge lion stroll past, barely a few metres from our window. Its shaggy gold mane was so long, it trailed in the dirt, like a rather bedraggled royal train. The lion seemed used to tourists. It just gave a bored yawn in our direction, exposing a mouth full of white, needle-sharp teeth.

Frankie gulped. “That’s one kittykat I wouldn’t want to play with.”

“What a magnificent beast!” Emma said in her prissy voice.

Kenny nudged Frankie. “I thought you were going to fall off your bones if you saw a lion?”

“I’ll make you fall off yours in a minute,” Frankie told her.

Eventually the lion loped away and the Landrover continued chugging down the track. Five minutes later, the ranger stopped again, this time to let us watch some monkeys playing chase in the trees.

Monkeys are SO nosy. The instant they saw us they came swinging down from the branches, chattering to each other in shrill, annoyed-sounding voices. They landed on the top of the Landrover and peered in at the windows. One immediately started trying to remove the windscreen wipers. Another one chittered angrily at itself in one of the wing mirrors.

“Ugh, do they have to show us their rude red bottoms,” complained Frankie.

Actually the baby monkeys really reminded me of my little brother. Not the rude bottoms, I don’t mean, but their expressions. They gazed in at us, looking so round-eyed and innocent, they almost made me want to cry. “I think they’re super sweet,” I said.

“Me too,” Kirstin smiled. “Actually my aunt keeps spider monkeys.”

“What monkeys?” Lyndz asked, instantly intrigued.

“Spider monkeys are very tiny, the size of a small doll.”

“I wonder if Dad would let me have a monkey,” mused Lyndz.

“Don’t take your eyes off her,” I told Kirstin, “or that girl will have a baby monkey zipped inside her hoodie before you know it.”

“Is that what happened with the pig?” giggled Kirstin.

“Don’t ask,” I joked. “I’ve only just stopped having nightmares.”

The monkeys had got bored with trying to steal the windscreen wipers. They crouched on the bonnet of the Landrover and started to style each other’s hair. Well, that’s what I thought they were doing until our ranger explained they were picking lice out of each other’s coats.

“But they’re eating them,” I protested.

“Lice are very nutritious!” he grinned.

“Too much information,” Lyndz said faintly.

Emma gave a prissy giggle. “I must say, I’d really hate to have to eat my own head lice!”

Kenny’s eyes gleamed. “Whose would you prefer? Emily’s?”

Emma went red. “I’m not going to answer that remark, Laura,” she said snootily.

“Ooh, look! That monkey with the big bottom looks exactly like Emily!” Frankie taunted.

“Not that we’ve ever
seen
Emily’s bottom,” Kenz sniggered.

I felt a sudden longing to be under the shower, soaping my hair with bubble-gum scented shampoo. Just the thought of lice made my scalp itch like crazy.

Mrs Weaver seemed oddly relieved when the monkeys swung off into the trees at last. “That was fascinating,” she said brightly. “But I didn’t expect them to come quite so close.”

We all exchanged meaningful glances.

Kenny made daring clucking noises under her breath.

Kirstin spluttered with giggles. “You guys are crazy.”

After that we drove for ages without seeing anything interesting.

“I want to see a tiger,” moaned Frankie.

“I can’t see any tigers, but I can spy something black and white that looks amazingly like a horse,” Kirstin told her.

“A zebra!” Lyndz shrieked. “My all-time favourite animal.”

The zebras looked smaller in real life than they seem on nature programmes. They were
more like cute little stripy ponies than horses. The design on their coats was so gorgeous that I couldn’t help imagining it on a t-shirt.

“They’re so gentle,” I said to Kirstin.

“The last time I saw a zebra, it was busy being lunch for a pack of lions,” she commented.

Rosie looked horrified. “How awful.”

Kenny’s eyes gleamed. “It’s not awful, it’s natural.”

“Then I don’t think I like Nature,” Rosie whispered.

A few minutes later the ranger suddenly killed the engine. “Try to keep your voices down,” he whispered, “or we’ll scare her off.”

A family of tigers was sunbathing under some oak trees.

The mother tiger’s orange and black stripes looked incredibly exotic in the spring landscape. She was washing one of her fuzzy little cubs. I saw how her slightest movement rippled the powerful muscles under her coat. The tiger might look peaceful now, but you could feel this electrifying wildness underneath. Everyone was in total awe.

“Is this a dream?” I whispered.

Mrs Weaver shook her head. “If it is, we’re having the same one.”

“Now I can die happy,” breathed Frankie.

“Me too,” said Kirstin softly.

Emma looked astonished. “Haven’t you seen a tiger before?”

Kirstin shook her head. “Never. You don’t get them in Africa. Actually I think tigers are from India.”

Emma went slightly pink. I sniggered to myself. Obviously I wasn’t the only ten year old who didn’t know where tigers came from!

“I’ve never seen one either,” she confessed to Kirstin. “And we come here loads.”

The ranger smiled. “Then this must be your lucky day.”

You know how cats like to find a patch of sun and chill? Well that’s what this very big cat was doing. Her funny little tiger babies were tumbling around her, staging play fights and licking each other’s ears.

“They might be killers,” Rosie whispered. “But they’re the most beautiful creatures on earth.”

“I know,” I whispered back. “I’m in love.”

Our thrilling safari experience came to an end at last and we all clambered out of the Landrover. My bottom was so numb I could hardly stand. Everyone had major pins and needles.

“That was SO perfect!” I said to Rosie happily.

“I can’t believe how sweet Emma’s being,” she said in a low voice. “You can see she’s desperate for Kirstin to have a good time.”

“Yeah,” said Lyndz. “It’s like we’re seeing a totally new side of her.”

Frankie gave her a withering look. “You’re such suckers,” she said. “Emma’s acting, stoopid, just like us. Isn’t she, Kenz?”

Kenny wasn’t listening. She was still clowning around, pretending her numb legs wouldn’t hold her up. Suddenly she tripped and fell over for real. “Ow!!” she yelped. “I landed on a stupid stone.”

“Lucky it was your bum,” Frankie told her. “It’s the fattest part!”

Kenny picked herself up. “Come here and say that!” she threatened.

Suddenly we were all having a mad Keystone Cops moment, as everyone helped
Kenny chase Frankie madly around the grounds, even Emma and Kirstin. Kirstin couldn’t run properly because she was laughing so much.

At the last minute, Emma dived on Frankie and brought her to the ground. “Gotcha!” she giggled. “I’ve ALWAYS wanted to do that!”

I suppose she was still overexcited from seeing the tiger. Or maybe she was a better actress than I’d realised. But just at that moment she looked, well, normal.

Frankie quickly wriggled free. “Have you really, Emma?” she said coldly. “Well, you got that one for free. The next one you’ll pay for.”

Emma’s expression changed. “Is that right?” she said ominously. She scrambled to her feet. Frankie jumped up, dusting off her trousers. Frankie and Emma began to circle each other menacingly, like flamenco dancers.

“I knew you couldn’t keep up your sugar and spice act, Emma Hughes,” Frankie spat. “Now your true colours are showing.”

Kirstin looked puzzled. “What’s Frankie talking about?”

Rosie gave a nervous giggle. “Don’t ask us.
We’re Frankie’s friends and we don’t understand her half the time, do we, Flissie?”

This is terrible! I thought. They’re really going to fight!!

Any minute now they’d be scrapping like wild cats and Operation Pretend Friend would be ruined. I had to do something. Something so bizarre and shocking that Emma and Frankie would temporarily forget about their feud. And then I knew!

“OH! OH! IT’S HORRIBLE!!” I shrieked at the top of my lungs. “OMIGOSH, FRANKIE! YOU WERE RIGHT!”

Frankie froze as she was just about to grab Emma’s ponytail.

“What are you on about?” she said nervously.

“I saw it,” I invented wildly. “Up there on the turrets! It was horrible!”

“What are you talking about?” Emma gasped.

“The ghost,” I lied. “I saw the ghost of Gawdy Castle!”