Sucking Bites (San Francisco Vampires Series #3) (4 page)

“I guess I wasn’t paying attention, I didn’t hear a thing. I’m too busy being pissed off.”

“Yes, we have to do something about this. You and Sebastian seem to be on the extreme ends of things lately. And each end of it entails screaming each other’s names,” Helena says with a wry smile.

This makes me laugh in spite of myself.

“I think I need some space from him for a while. He needs to resolve some things with work. I can’t keep dealing with a phone instead of a person and he needs to realize I love him but need some time before we get married. I’m just not ready to give up my independence.”

“What are you afraid of Lily?”

“I’m afraid of belonging to Sebastian and not being me anymore.”

“I don’t think that is going to happen, dear. Sebastian is very possessive and territorial, it’s partly the French in him and partly the alpha male in him. He is getting legitimately insecure, thinking your hesitation is because you don’t want to marry him.”

“I can understand that,” I say.

“He’s a horse’s ass. I wouldn’t talk to him for the rest of your life if I were you,” Aidan says as he pops into the room.

I sigh. “Aidan, that wouldn’t help anything. I hope you two haven’t tried fist fighting again?”

“No, but maybe we should. I would love to break his nose.”

“Aidan, if I remember correctly, you both had broken noses,” Helena reminds him.

“You might be right, Helena, but it was worth it. He has banned me from seeing you again, Lilith. So of course the first thing I did was to come upstairs to see you. Ahhh, yes, here he comes.”

“Damn you, Aidan! I told you I didn’t want you to see her anymore!” Sebastian bellows from the stairs.

In a blur he bursts through the door.

“I think I can decide who I see and who I don’t see, Sebastian,” I say as I tighten my hands into fists.

“He’s a bad influence on you, Lily. I won’t stand for it any longer,” Sebastian yells in my face.

“Fine, if that’s the way you want it. I will not be with a tyrant.”

I leave the room, run down the stairs, grab my purse off the hall table and run out the door. Thank God my car isn’t blocked in. I get in and slam my door. As I am driving away, I see Sebastian in the doorway. His fists are clenched and he stares at my disappearing car. I make it to the end of the street before I start crying. What on earth have I done?

Aidan pops into the car and sits quietly. He doesn’t say a word as I drive around randomly, sobbing. I finally pull over and he holds me as I cry.

“I’m so sorry, love,” he says as he rubs my back.

“Yeah sure, like you didn’t want this all along,” I cry.

“No, I never wanted your heart broken.”

“I don’t know what I just did. I love him, but we’ve been fighting so much lately and I won’t be treated like a possession, dammit!”

“Here, love, have some hand sanitizer.”

Aidan summons some of the best on the market. I greedily take it and slather it on. I start to calm down a little.

“Thanks, Aidan,” I sniff.

“Do you want to go back?”

“No, can I go to your place for a while?”

“Of course, you know that it will drive him over the edge, though.”

“He’ll just have to deal with it, won’t he?”

Aidan gives me a look.

We drive to Chinatown and find a parking garage I can leave my car in before Aidan pops us into his apartment. I relax. It’s quiet even though it’s located above the busy Chinatown streets. Though Djinn like the energy of human emotions they have their individual preferences, Aidan doesn’t like violence and his home is always calm. No tension. Aidan turns on some jazz and summons wine for me. He throws himself into a black leather chair and motions for me to make myself at home. I had only been here once before and then I was confused about my feelings for him. I had spent the time dancing and kissing Aidan. This time, I take my glass of wine and look around. The paintings lining the walls are by artists I know but none are pieces I recognize. Aidan watches me as I walk around the big loft stopping to examine a painting here and there and to ask him questions about the pieces. We had spent several hours laughing and exploring in Istanbul without a minute of unease but now I’m a little uncomfortable. There is no reason for it, I tell myself. Aidan is my friend and I can hide out at a friend’s house if I want to.

Aidan gets up and walks up behind me and puts a hand on the base of my back.

“Do you want to lie down for a while?”

“Yeah, that would be great. I think I need some down time. Do you even have a bed?”

“Yes, I don’t use it much, but I like to lie down sometimes and reflect. It’s in here.”

He leads me into a room decorated in a Middle Eastern motif in shades of blues and whites. A mosaic fits into the beautiful blue and white tile floor. Ornately carved posts stand in the corners of the room gilded with gold leaf. In the middle of the room is a huge round bed covered in satins, under flowing curtains of netting.

“Isn’t this a little cliché, Aidan?”

“Maybe, but I like it and it’s comfortable.”

“It does look decadent. I think I can give it a try. If I must be in hiding at least I’ll be pampered.”

“That’s the spirit. I’ll leave you alone for a while.”

“Thanks, Aidan.”

Aidan leaves and I pull out my cell phone. I call Helena.

“Hello, Helena?”

“Lily! Where are you? Are you okay?”

“I’m okay. I’m actually at Aidan’s place.”

“I’m not going to repeat that. Sebastian is sick with worry. I’ve never seen him so upset. You’re breaking his heart, Lilith,” she says soberly.

“My heart is breaking too, Helena. I can’t keep going this way. I don’t know what to do. I don’t know what I’m doing. I just know I need a little bit of time. Please tell Bast that I’m okay and that I love him, I just need time to think things through. Tell him that I’m someplace safe.”

“I can do that. He is probably going to figure it out. Sort things out as quickly as you can, sweetheart. I understand completely.”

“I will. You can reach me on my phone if you need me.”

I hang up the phone and lay back on the soft bed. I feel like I’m in a Lawrence of Arabia movie. As soon as I get comfortable my phone rings. My caller ID says it is Sebastian. I debate whether or not to answer it and finally pick up before it goes to voice mail.

“Hello.” I sigh.

“Hello.”

He sounds cautious.

“Helena told me you just called her and that you were safe. I’ve been worried.”

“I’ve been a mess. I don’t know what I’m doing Sebastian,” I say with a trembling voice.

“Then come home and we’ll talk about it,” he says firmly.

“I need some time to think things through. I love you but all we do is fight lately. That can’t be right.”

“I’ve hired a headhunter to find a replacement for Paul. You were right. I’ve been spending too much time at the club. I interview two prospects in just a little while.”

“That’s great. That would be a big step in the right direction for us.”

“What are you going to do tonight?”

“I think I will hang out here.”

I hear silence on the other end of the line.

“I was hoping we could get together later and discuss this,” he says stiffly.

“I need more time to think, Sebastian.” More silence.

“If you think that is what you need,” he says, his displeasure evident.

“I do.”

“Then please call me when you want to talk or I will see you at home when you get here. I’ll be at the club until eleven and then I’m coming home. I love you, Cherie.”

And he hangs up. I suddenly feel very lonely. I start to cry again.

“Lilith?”

Aidan must have radar tuned into my emotions. He sits on the bed next to me and lets me cry on his shoulder. Watching a vampire cry is not a pretty sight. We don’t shed tears so it is this dry sobbing thing that closely resembles retching. Like I said, not pretty.

“Love, it can’t be that bad, can it?”

“I just talked to him. I feel so lonely all of a sudden. It’s very hard to tell him I need space. It’s hard to be away from him at all. I guess that’s a good thing, right?”

“Right. Not for me, but definitely good for him.”

“Aidan, I do love you as a friend and I will always be attracted to you which is a dangerous thing,” I say.

“Danger I like,” he grins.

I smile weakly at him.

“Behave, Aidan.”

“Let’s lie down for a while and be quiet. You need to think and take a time out.”

He pulls me down and up close to his warm body. I forgot how much heat he radiates. He is a fire spirit after all. It feels safe next to him. I forget how lonely I am. Soon he is kissing the back of my head and playing with my hair. It feels so good, but I know I need to stop him.

“Aidan.”

“Hmmm…”

“We shouldn’t be this close.”

“I’m just being a good friend, that’s all. Be quiet now.”

So I shut up and relax. He strokes my hair and then runs his fingers up and down my arm. I shiver. He holds me closer. We stay like that for a long time. We talk about everything but Sebastian or our feelings for each other. It’s dawn and I will soon fall asleep.

Aidan summons me a sleeveless ebony silk gown with thigh high slits along the sides. Heavy embroidery covers the neckline. The silk is so fine that it shows everything. He leaves so I can change. After I crawl into bed he comes back in pajama pants with his beautiful chest bare and crawls in with me. He continues to hold me while I fall asleep. I wake up to his warm body and smiling face. He kisses me on the forehead and then drops quick kisses along my jaw before hesitating to kiss me on the mouth but I move away.

“I can’t, Aidan.”

“I understand,” he says. He actually looks like he does and he is still smiling.

“I’m just thankful for last night,” he says. “It was a true gift to talk to you and hold you.”

“It was for me too.”

“Let me summon you something to wear and some coffee, love.”

He brings me an Alice & Olivia outfit that is the cutest thing and some matching shoes. The outfit consists of a white cap sleeve blouse and black flutter shorts. Of course the lingerie is French and gorgeous. It gives me a little thrill to think he knows what I am wearing under my clothes. I jump in the shower and hurry to get dressed. Before I can ask Aidan for a toothbrush and some makeup I find them on the bed waiting for me. Always brush the fangsters. It isn’t long before I’m presentable.

As I’m getting dressed, I consider why I’m back in Aidan’s arms and fighting with Bast. This is the last place I imagined I would be a few months ago. I know I’m scared, but I sense that Bast is too. For as much as he professes his love and his urgent need to marry, I think he is just as scared as I am. I think that is why he needs to marry me. That way he can tell himself it’s too late to change his mind.

He’s willful and strong and I’m independent and stubborn. When two people like that fall in love, they are bound to have good and bad times. We live, love and fight passionately. Where does Aidan fit in there? He has an insidious effect on our relationship. I know Aidan would admit it. He wants nothing more than to break us up.

I go out to the living area to join him.  He’s wearing jeans and a cashmere sweater the color of his eyes. His sculpted chest looks scrumptious through the thin sweater, dammit.

“What do you want to do today, Lilith?”

I know her “someplace safe” is with Aidan. Fuck! He maneuvers himself in whenever there is a sliver of trouble. The bastard! Well played, fire boy, but the next move will be mine. I am not losing her to you. I slam the car door after I get in. It feels good to let off some steam. I have to be careful not to break the door with my strength, though. Still a little slam is better than nothing. If I didn’t have to go the club, I would hunt them down tonight. I bet I can find his little lair.

Pulling up to valet parking, I notice everything running smoothly here. At least these guys know their job and do it well.

“Good evening Mr. St. John.”

“Bon soir, Dave.”

Twenty-five minutes early for my first appointment. Just enough time to check on the mood of the club and get myself calmed down. If Aidan were only human I would have drained him months ago. Merde, I can’t think beyond that damned Djinn. Where is a good battle when you need it? The club is packed. At least business hasn’t died off. If I can get someone in here who knows what they are doing, we can keep it this way.

I wind through the dancers, some dressed in period clothing, some dressed for a night on the town, but all of them having a good time. The candy girls flow seamlessly through the crowds. Flashes follow the photographers, capturing the moment for patrons. My mind eases as I enter the hallway to the offices.

I turn on the lights to my office and find Paul and one of the waitresses having sex across my desk.

Merde, what else is going to happen tonight? I want to snap him like a twig. Great therapy for me, messy to cleanup.

“Paul, pull your pants up. Theresa, get dressed and get back to work.”

“Yes, Mr. St. John.” Theresa hurries from the room giving Paul a flirtatious look over her shoulder. It makes me smile. A woman like that is what I would have chased a year ago. The smile drops when I turn back to Paul.