Surrogate and Wife (16 page)

J
ake watched the nurse wheel the sonogram machine from the room with a mixture of excitement and dread.

On the one hand, he wanted to be alone with Kate. To hold her in his arms and talk about the joy of seeing their baby girl's face for the first time.

On the other hand, he couldn't blame her for no longer wanting to be with him. He'd promised to protect her, sworn she could trust him. And he'd let her down. She might never be able to forgive him.

If she still wanted to get a divorce, he'd honor her wishes. After he did everything in his power to convince her she was wrong. But he knew how stubborn she could be. He'd have to act fast.

“Kate, I—”

“Jake—”

They both broke off at the same time. She laughed nervously, but laughing was the last thing he felt like doing.

“You go.” She clasped her hands together on top of the blanket in a posture that was—for Kate—practically demure. But she didn't meet his gaze.

This wasn't good. Not at all.

Maybe it would have been polite to let her go first, but screw polite. He was pretty damn certain he didn't want to hear what she had to say. No way was he going to give her the chance to blow him off before he could say his piece.

“Look, Kate, I know you have this whole list of reasons why we should get a divorce, but I think you're wrong.”

“Jake, I—”

“Just hear me out. It's only fair that you hear all the reasons why we should stay married.”

“But—”

“Come on, Katie, you're nothing if not fair.”

She opened her mouth as if to protest, then just shrugged. “Okay, but—”

He didn't give her a chance to launch any more protests. “Things are going to be tougher now than they were before. Even if you hire someone to be with you during the day, you can't hire someone to be there twenty-four hours a day. That's just not feasible. I can be there in the evenings and on weekends.”

He studied her expression, looking for any sign she might be receptive. A little frown had settled onto her forehead.

Okay, so she wasn't convinced yet. He'd just have to press on.

“Plus, there's your job to think of. Hatcher could use our divorce against you. He could even use your need for medical leave against you. You don't know what he's capable of.”

Kate's frown deepened. “Those are the only reasons you think we should stay married?”

Ah, crap. This wasn't working.

“Well…no, of course not.” Okay, Morgan, think. What would convince her? What did she care most about? “Obviously, there's also the baby to think of.”

“The baby,” she said flatly.

“Sure. If we take care of you, we take care of the baby. And a healthy baby is what's most important to both of us, right?”

“Yes, of course.” But he couldn't help notice her hands clenching and unclenching on the blanket over her belly. “You're absolutely right.” Suddenly she flipped the covers back and swung her legs over the side of the bed. “I'll go ahead and change. That way I'll be all ready to go when the doctor comes by.”

He watched in confusion as she gingerly walked toward the bathroom. She'd almost made it there when he stopped her.

“Whoa. Hold on a minute. Did I miss something?”

“No, not at all.”

“So did you just agree we should stay married?”

“Your arguments were very persuasive.”

“But did I persuade you?”

He held his breath waiting for her answer. So much was riding on it. So much more than she knew. This wasn't about her job. It wasn't even about the health of the baby. This was about their whole future.

How funny that mere weeks ago, she'd had to convince him to get married and now he was desperately trying to convince her to stay married. And all he could do was wait for her answer and try again if it was “no.”

For a long moment she just stared at the floor and
said nothing. Finally she turned to him, her eyes brimming with tears.

“Everything you've said makes sense. But no matter how much we both love this baby, she's not enough to base a marriage on. Not a real marriage anyway. Not the kind of marriage I want.”

“What kind of marriage is that?”

“A marriage based on love.”

Jake felt as if his heart skipped a beat and he had to suck in a deep breath. “Are you saying that's what you want in
a
marriage or that's what you want from
our
marriage?”

He couldn't take his eyes from her face as he waited for her to answer. It was all he could do not to stride across the room, pull her into his arms and try to coax from her the answer he so desperately wanted.

But he made himself stand still. The time for persuasion was past. Now he just wanted the truth.

“I want both,” she said finally, her hand drifting to her belly. “It's great that you love the baby, but that's not enough for me. I need you to love me, too. Really love me. Not just say you do. Because I love you. Goodness knows, I tried not to. But I—”

She was in his arms, his lips moving over hers, before the next words could make it out of her mouth. As they kissed he was painfully aware of the delicacy of her condition. So he poured into the kiss all of the tenderness he felt. All of the love. Because he wanted her to know—unequivocally—how much he loved her.

He brushed his lips across hers one final time, then ended the kiss. Cradling her face in his hands, he gazed down into her eyes, willing her to believe him. To trust him.

“Yes, I love our baby. But I love her even more
because
she's our baby. She's a part of us. And I love that she's a part of you, because I love you.” Kate's eyes wid
ened slightly and her lips started to curl into a smile. “If it hadn't been for our little girl, I may never have had the chance to fall in love with you. But I love you—and will always love you—because of who you are. Not because of the baby.”

Whatever else he might have said, she cut off by rising onto her toes and pulling his mouth down to hers. She kissed him with none of the tenderness he'd shown, but plastered her mouth and body against his. If she felt delicate or frail, she didn't show it in her kiss.

And her love? That was definitely in her kiss. The pure emotion there left no room for doubt.

Finally, she pulled back just enough to smile and say, “I do believe you've convinced me.”

“I know you might have trouble trusting me. But that will never happen again. I promise. And I—”

“Jake, it's okay. Last night, you said you couldn't protect me from everything. And you're right. No one could make that kind of promise.”

“Kate, I—”

“I know you'll protect me when you can, but there will be things you can't protect me from. There will be things I can't protect you from, either. The important thing is that we don't let those things drive us apart. If we keep this baby and stay married, yes, there's potential for all kinds of things to go wrong. But there's also potential for all kinds of wonderful things, too. I think I'm finally willing to accept both.”

Jake met her gaze, his eyes filled with love and hope. “So you really want to give this marriage a shot? You want to keep our baby?”

In love there was so much potential for pain, but there was potential for great joy, too. It made her so happy, knowing she could make him happy.

She nodded. “I do. We'll need to talk to Beth and Stew of course, but yes, I do.” Offering up a tremulous smile, she added, “Jake, all this time I thought I couldn't be the right woman for you because you wanted someone you could rescue.”

“But—”

She stopped his words with a finger to his lips. “The thing is, it turns out I do need you to rescue me. I need you to save me from myself. Without you, I might have spent my whole life hiding from life. But now I'm ready to face anything. As long as I have you.”

A knock sounded. Then the doctor strolled into the room without waiting for an answer, without even looking up from the clipboard he held open in his arm. “Well, everything here looks good, Ms. Bennet.”

By the time the doctor looked up, Kate had stepped out of Jake's arms, but still held his hand in hers. “Actually, it's Mrs. Morgan.”

The doctor glanced down at his chart in confusion. “But it…ah, I see. Jake Morgan is listed here as the father.” He looked up at Jake. “That's you?”

Kate answered before he could. “Yes. We're the parents. She's our baby girl.”

Then she slanted a look in Jake's direction that said much more than that.