The Adventures of Caterwaul the Cat (26 page)

Pudding ran up to Muse excitedly. There were only two more days until her cousin would be reunited with her heroic Caterwaul. Neither of the females had ever been invited to a royal function before, and they really had no inkling how to prepare. Muse wanted to make the best impression possible so that the queen would like her.

Because Pudding had been a dressmaker, she knew something of fashion. In the home in which they lived, there were all manner of bangles, bows, and strips of colored ribbon. The chocolate-colored kitty wanted to make sure her cousin was the fairest cat in all the land when she showed up at the castle for the feast.

You see, Pudding knew her cousin was in love. She had never seen Muse so happy. It was more than just the fact that he had saved her life, although that would usually be enough to encourage devotion. There was something special about Caterwaul. He was one in a million, the kind of cat who really stood for something, and both she and her cousin knew it.

Since they both had once been human, they'd retained the human fascination for dressing up. They spent hours trying on different variations of ribbons and collars and costume jewels. After all, they had been teenagers just a few short weeks before.

“I think that's just perfect,” said Pudding, admiring her handiwork. Muse looked absolutely amazing. She was wearing a beautiful ribbon of cerulean blue, which looped in a bow at her breast. Her collar was covered in jewels they had scavenged from one of the homes of another transformee. Her hair was styled perfectly, and her face beamed with the joy of new love.

“Do you think the queen will like me, cousin?” asked Muse.

“How could she not?” replied Pudding reassuringly. “You are the most beautiful cat I have ever seen, and you are twice as lovely inside as out. If she doesn't adore you as Caterwaul does, it will be because she has no heart. But your Caterwaul would never stay with someone with no heart, so it follows she will love you.”

The smile on Muse's face was electric. She hopped up on a chair to see herself in the mirror. It was the same mirror that had changed her weeks ago.
That was the best day of my life,
she thought. She would never go back, even if she could.

Druciah was humming to herself as she moved along the corridors of her huge and empty castle. She was overjoyed and full of herself. The queen was so happy she was practically dancing as she glided down the passageway toward the kitchen, where she knew Orris, her chef, was waiting.

“Orris, my dear, the day is nigh upon us,” she shouted down the hall. “We will at long last be having company. The day after tomorrow, my loyal servant Caterwaul is introducing us to the most perfect specimen of a pure-white female cat in all the land.”

Under her breath, she added, “And I will have my beauty once again.”

She was puffed up with confidence that her plan was bearing fruit as she strode into the kitchen, where her chef was hard at work preparing for the feast to come.

“Is everything ready?” she asked.

“Yes, your majesty. I have done everything you asked.”

His head was down. He had been around Druciah enough in Caterwaul's absence to know she was planning something, and he was not at all happy about being a part of what he felt soon would be the betrayal of a friend.

Over the time they spent together, Orris had grown to respect and care about the black feline. Caterwaul had brought a sense of fun back into this tedious castle existence. He wasn't sure exactly what was in the queen's mind, but he knew her well enough to be suspicious.

“Good,” she said, “show me what you've done.”

“Your majesty, I have prepared the sauce to your specifications, and now I am working on the crust. I must admit I was worried about some of the ingredients. As you might have imagined, I've never worked with salamanders or the toes of rats before, so you will excuse me if I had my doubts. But I assure you the end result . . .
c'est magnifique
.” He brought his thumb and index finger together in a loop and kissed them as he said these final words.

“As far as the crust goes, I have dispatched one of your best men to procure the honey necessary to sweeten the dough, because I know that you are not fond of caramel.”

“Excellent,” she said expectantly. “Then things are almost ready. All we need now is the main ingredient, and it will be delivered soon.”

“But what is the main ingredient, your majesty?” he asked her respectfully. “After all these years I have worked for you, is it too much to ask to know the main ingredient featured in this pie?”

“Why, Orris, it is the tail of a pure-white female cat,” she answered him excitedly. “And she will be arriving very soon.” She giggled insanely with her own cleverness, while across from her, Orris bowed his head in shame.

From his position safely hidden on the shelf behind the spice jars, Caterwaul witnessed this entire exchange. He thought he was going to be sick. Everything he thought and felt about this queen was a lie. She was clearly out of her mind. Her aging and vain obsession had completely put her psyche out of balance.

While he thought he was bringing a guest to his home to enjoy the hospitality of the castle, he was actually leading his darling Muse into a trap. Druciah had used him the entire time. And now it was clear that Orris was also involved. This puzzled him and caused him to choke. He wondered how Orris could be any part of such a plan. While he sat there in hiding, sickened, the queen turned giddily toward the entrance to the room and left.

Well, Caterwaul had news for the queen. Things were not going to go the way she'd planned. Not if he had anything to say about it.

23

Feline Pie

C
aterwaul would not let the queen out of his sight. He knew she had terrible plans for his beloved Muse. Those plans included the taking of her tail. There was no way he was going to let that happen—he would stop her.

He was a cat and, therefore, naturally surefooted, but his experiences of the last week or so had made him craftier and more catlike than he'd been in years. He really felt alive, and all this clandestine activity really got his blood flowing.

He was spying on her the day that Muse was set to arrive. He overheard Druciah telling her chef what he was to do once the white cat got there. From what Caterwaul could gather, Druciah had acquired some kind of drug, which she wanted Orris to put into the dessert course of the five-course meal. With both Caterwaul and Muse unconscious from this drug, Druciah intended for Orris to then come in and take Muse's tail.

Caterwaul shook violently at the thought of his Muse losing her tail.

Then he smiled because he realized that all he had to do was make sure the sedative never made it into their food.

Still, he couldn't understand why Orris, of all people, would turn on him. Orris had been his friend, and he thought, perhaps foolishly, that he had been the one to bring substance back into the cook's life. The cat decided to hide in the kitchen for a while to watch him.

What Caterwaul saw was a man torn. He was stretched thinly between his loyalty to his queen, which was owed by right and custom, and the loyalty to his friend, which was owed by what was in his heart. Flustered, the chef held the bottle of the elixir in his hand. He turned it over and over repeatedly trying to decide which course was the best to take.

Finally he made up his mind. He could not do it. He slammed the crystal bottle on the counter and went off in search of his friend.

Caterwaul waited until Orris had left the kitchen before jumping down. The bottle was small, and its stopper was fitted with an eyedropper. Caterwaul was able to grasp the bottle and hook the stopper through his collar. Setting the vial squarely between his shoulders, he was able to carry it off.

On his way to follow Orris, Caterwaul encountered the queen. “Are you excited to see your lovely friend Muse, my love?” she asked.

“Yes, of course I am, my queen,” he said. “I miss her. It's been far too many days since the last time I saw her.”

“Well,” said Druciah, “she will be here tomorrow afternoon, and I promise you that she will be treated like a princess. I do so enjoy the company of cats, much more than that of other humans.”

“Thank you, your majesty. You have been very good to me,” said Caterwaul, excusing himself.

“Oh, and Caterwaul,” added the queen, “make sure to remove the spell from all of the mirrors, won't you, my darling?”

“Of course, your majesty,” he said.

Caterwaul found the chef sitting on the narrow bridge over the koi pond. He was looking sad and forlorn. “You look like a man with a lot on his mind,” Caterwaul opened.

Orris just looked at him with that sadness in his eyes.

“Caterwaul, you and I are friends.”

“I have come to believe so,” the cat answered.

“Well . . . I have something I must tell you.”

“I know.”

Orris was puzzled. “You . . . you know?”

“You, my friend, face a dilemma. You have been told to do something by the queen, your mistress, which you know with all of your heart and soul to be wrong. Am I right on this, Orris?” Orris shook his head in answer, yes.