The Divining (23 page)

     "What do you mean?"

     "Jacob and I will be reunited in the Resurrection." Seeing that Ulrika did not understand, Rachel said, "In the Book of Job it is written, 'Once more my skin shall clothe me, and in my flesh I will have sight of God.' Another prophet, named Daniel, said that those who lie sleeping in the dust of the earth shall wake, to enjoy life everlasting. And our Teacher, who was crucified by Rome, said that we shall rise again at the resurrection, when the Last Day comes."

     Rachel added, "Because I trust you, Ulrika, and because of the circumstances of how we met, I am going to tell you what I have never told another soul. My husband is buried here and it is my task in life to protect his grave. This is why I stay."

     Ulrika looked around, but saw no grave marker. "What do you mean, the circumstances of how we met?

     "The place where Almah and I found you, on that spot where you hurt your ankle and called out for help, that is where my Jacob is buried."

     Ulrika's eyes flew open. "I was lying upon a
grave
?"

     "Eleven years ago, my husband's political enemies assassinated him and I knew that their persecution of him would not stop with his death, that they would not be satisfied until they had scattered his bones to the winds. And so I and a few loyal friends brought my Jacob's body down here and buried it in a secret place, with no marker, nothing to indicate that he rested there. My friends stayed with me, but over the years, one by one they left. This is why I do not live at the oasis, and why I cannot go to Babylon with you, for I must keep eternal vigil on Jacob's resting place, to protect it from his enemies."

     Ulrika was stunned.
She
had not chosen the place but had been led there by the spirit of a wolf. And then she recalled the profound vision she had experienced on that place—the man with blinding light radiating from his head and hands.

U
LRIKA COULD NOT STOP THINKING ABOUT
R
ACHEL'S FOCUSED
meditation. If it connected a person to the Divine, then might it not also connect
her
to the Divining?

     She chose a day when Rachel and Almah went to the oasis. With the aid of a walking staff, for her ankle was still tender, Ulrika walked down to the place where the two women had found her, injured and calling for help. She supposed she could have experimented with the meditation anywhere in this wilderness, but this was where she had experienced two intense visions. And a man was buried here. Perhaps this place possessed a special energy, and that was why the visions had been so startling.

     Recalling the steps Rachel had outlined, Ulrika sat with her face into the wind as sunshine shimmered off the surface of the distant Sea of Salt. She crossed her legs, covered her face with her hands, and concentrated on slowing her respiration, controlling her lungs. When she was breathing deeply, in a measured rhythm, she chose an image upon which to center her thoughts. "Choose something that is personal," Rachel had advised. "Something
simple and pure." And so Ulrika conjured up in her mind the inner flame which burns in every soul, and then she began a whispered chant. As the words came over and over, as her hands blocked out the world, Ulrika began to sway, for as Rachel said, "We put our entire bodies into prayer so that we pray even with our sinew and bones."

     Ulrika watched the inner light, the glimmering soul flame, and sent her repeated prayer into the cosmos: "Compassionate All Mother, hear my plea. Compassionate All Mother, hear my plea." And gradually Ulrika began to feel a sweet peace steal over her, felt her worries and fears melt away. The image of the flame grew until she could feel its heat, and she trembled to think that the image of the radiant man, that had filled her with such joyous ecstasy, was about to materialize.

     But instead, a wild countryside of rolling green hills and barren rocks coalesced in her mind's eye, trees twisted by constant winds filled her inner vision, and she saw the scallop-shell altar, the beautiful woman in flowing white robes.

     It was Gaia, again, the distant ancestress of Sebastianus Gallus.

     Ulrika formed a question in her mind and sent it forth. "Can you help me, Honored One?"

     "You are arrogant, daughter," Gaia said. "You do not come to this sacred place with a humble heart, but rather seeking ecstasy and joy. And you are impatient and impulsive. Remember the recklessness in the Rhineland, when you left the caravan and endangered your companions."

     "I am sorry for that," Ulrika said, surprised that she was being chastised, and then accepting that she deserved it. "But I wish to understand my gift. What is the Divining? What am I to do with it? And where is Shalamandar?"

     "So many questions in your arrogance. You wish all things to come to you without any effort on your part. Overcome your flaws, daughter. Turn your weaknesses into strengths, and your spiritual power will grow."

     "But how do I do that?"

     "You must be taught, you must learn."

     "But I have learned. I am doing everything right."

     "You are not yet ready. You have not yet learned all you need to know."

     "But from whom do I learn?" Ulrika cried silently. "It makes no sense, the student teaching herself!"

     The Galician countryside shimmered and grew unfocused. Ulrika now saw palm trees and stars. Once again, she saw Sebastianus walking toward her. "Gaia!" she called out. "Please come back."

     Now Ulrika found herself in the warm tavern in Antioch, and then it too grew distorted until she was back in the shaman's cave in the Rhineland.

     I cannot control my visions ...

     She summoned the inner flame again, struggled with her respirations, attempted the repetitious chant once more, but the visions faded, the soul flame dimmed, and when Ulrika finally took her hands away from her face, she saw that the sun was near the western horizon, and that she was lying on her side in the sand.

     She had fallen asleep!

     Gaia was right, she thought in disappointment. I came here with an arrogant heart, thinking I had mastered my thoughts, thinking I had perfected Rachel's meditation. I still have no control. My gift is still in its infancy.

     But as Ulrika lifted herself to her feet, steadying herself on the walking staff, she realized that although she had not made better progress in gaining answers, she was excited nonetheless about a new development: the vision of Gaia had not come to her unbidden. Ulrika had been the one to command a vision—
she
had chosen the time and the place.

     It was the first step, she knew, toward controlling her gift. From now on, she was confident, her power would grow.

U
LRIKA'S ANKLE HEALED OVER
the course of the weeks she spent with the two women, and eventually the day came to say goodbye. A small wine caravan had rested at the oasis, and the owner was willing to take Ulrika as far as Petra in the south, which was located at a major trade crossroads and where she would find a caravan to take her eastward to Babylon.

     Rachel and Almah accompanied her to the oasis, where Almah wept and embraced Ulrika as a daughter.

     Then Ulrika turned to Rachel, her new friend whom she would never forget. "I have a gift for you," she said.

     During one of her first nights in the camp, Ulrika had asked, "You have sacrificed so much. What do you miss the most?" And Rachel, after a moment, had replied, "Perfume."

     Ulrika now opened her medicine kit and brought out a small glass vial stoppered with wax. An Egyptian hieroglyphic identified the precious
contents. Pressing this into Rachel's hands, she said, "This is oil of lilies. It soothes the troubled heart."

     In return, Rachel placed a talisman around Ulrika's neck, to join the scallop shell and Cross of Odin. It was small and carved from cedar, and hung at the end of a slender hemp thread. "It is called the
mogan david,"
she said, "which means the Shield of David." Ulrika saw that the talisman was made of two triangles united around a central point, making it resemble a six-pointed star. "Between here and Babylon," Rachel said, "you will enter into Jewish communities, and when they see this star, they will take you in as one of their own."

     "Tell your stories at the oasis, Rachel, as you told them to me."

     "I will," Rachel said. And then she took Ulrika's hands into her own and said, "'For you shall go out with joy and be led out with peace; the mountains and the hills shall break forth into singing before you.'" She squeezed Ulrika's hand. "That is from the prophet Isaiah. Peace unto you, Ulrika. And God's blessings. I pray you find what you are searching for."

T
HEY WERE SIX SISTERS
in search of husbands, and they had come to Babylon to find them.

     Ulrika was not sure the young women, ranging from thirteen years old to twenty-four, had been given accurate information, but they were hopeful and full of cheer, and had livened the journey from the oasis at Bir Abbas, where they had joined the flax caravan and told their remarkable tale. Their father, a widower, had had to sell his house, his sheep, and himself into slavery to cover gambling debts. And so he had been forced to send his daughters out into the world in the hope of finding a better life.

     They rode on the back of a flat dray drawn by mules, seven young women, two grandmothers, and one elderly carpenter, swaying with the vehicle as they watched the towers and smoke fires of Babylon draw near. Ulrika had joined the caravan in the town of Petra, where a Babylonian flax trader had brought massive sacks of fibers, seed, and flowers to sell to makers of linens, medicines, and dyes. To fill his empty drays for the return trip, he took paying passengers who joined or left at various settlements and farms along
the way. Now he was reaching the terminus of his biannual journey, and his passengers looked forward to food and lodgings and a steady ground beneath their feet.

     Ulrika's excitement grew. After weeks of desert travel, camping at oases, walking, riding, constantly on the move, she felt the fresh breeze from the Euphrates River whisper against her face. The desert gradually gave over to lush green farms, dense groves of date palms, fields of wheat and barley. Marshes and ponds appeared now, from which lively waterfowl flew up in rainbows of color. Beyond, a ribbon of blue lazily wound its way between banks thick with poplars and tamarisks, to disappear under city walls—Babylon straddled the Euphrates—and emerge on the other side, bringing water to thirsty sheep and goats.

     As Ulrika's small caravan neared the Adad Gate, a major entry in the western wall, through which heavy traffic was passing to and fro, she recited a silent prayer of thanks to the All Mother. She had come through the long trek unscathed, and now would soon be reunited with the man she loved—her love growing with every dawn as she held the handsome Sebastianus in her heart and mind, picturing his bronze-colored hair in the sunshine, hearing his deep authoritative voice, seeing his dimpled smile. Although many in Ulrika's group would leave the caravan here and enter the city on foot, Ulrika would stay on the road and follow it to the southern tip of the walled city, where she had been told the caravans to the East were launched. She knew she would find Sebastianus there.