The Forgotten Family (5 page)

‘What do you think he’ll be like?’ Philip fidgeted nervously. ‘Hope he’s not too handy with a cane.’

‘Oh, Philip.’ Ellie laughed. ‘Father wouldn’t choose someone like that.’

‘Of course he would. He must be in despair with you. You’ve been thrown out of three schools.’

‘Two.’ She pulled a face. ‘Don’t make it sound worse than it is.’

‘It couldn’t be much worse. How did you manage it? I couldn’t even get sent home
once
, and I tried hard enough. That school was beastly. Do you know that we had to wash in freezing water, and then run around the field five times before we could have breakfast.’ Philip shuddered.  ‘They said it was good for building character. It would be just my luck to find this tutor was of the same mind.’

‘He won’t be anything like that.’

‘I hope you’re right.’ Philip stared gloomily out of the window. ‘Now it’s raining.’

‘For goodness’ sake, cheer up.’ Ellie marched across the room towards her cousin. ‘Come on, I’ll teach you how to fight, then if you have to go to another school, you can get yourself expelled.’

‘Stop it, Ellie.’ He fended her off, slipping behind a chair for protection.

She stalked him as he tried to avoid her, laughing with glee. ‘You’re a coward, Harry.’

Philip frowned, keeping her at arm’s length. ‘What did you call me that for?’

‘Call you what?’ Ellie asked.

‘Harry. You called me Harry.’

‘Of course I didn’t …’

‘What are you two up to?’

‘Nothing, Uncle Albert.’ Philip ducked out of Ellie’s way.

‘Come now. We could hear you in the library. Eleanor?’

‘Sorry Father.’ Ellie straightened her skirt until it was hanging straight to the floor. ‘I was offering to teach Philip how to fight, but he ran away from me.’

‘Very wise of you, Philip.’

‘She’s too strong for me, sir. And she’s being silly by calling me Harry.’

A stillness descended upon the room as Albert stared intently at his daughter. ‘Why did you do that?’

‘I didn’t, he’s imagining things.’

‘I was not!’

‘That’s enough! Mr Rogers is waiting to meet you, so behave yourselves or he will resign before he has even begun the lessons. And that will mean boarding school for both of you again.’

That threat sobered them, and they dutifully followed her father into the library. They stopped suddenly when they saw the young man standing by the bookcase, reading, with spectacles on the end of his nose.

She nudged Philip, and whispered in his ear, ‘I told you father wouldn’t engage an old man, didn’t I?’

Uncle Henry was also there, and gave them a stern look, warning them to be quiet.

‘This is Eleanor and Philip.’ Albert motioned them forward. ‘It may be prudent to keep them apart during lessons, as they have a tendency to argue, as you no doubt heard.’

The tutor replaced the book on the shelf in an unhurried fashion, pushed his spectacles up on his nose, and studied the two in front of him.

Ellie felt distinctly uncomfortable under the scrutiny of his alert grey eyes, and that was something she was not used to. Her hand came up to pat her hair, wondering if it was in place after her tussle with Philip. If she had thought it would be possible to manipulate him, then she had been wrong. There was a quiet air of strength about him.

‘And what do you argue about?’ His gaze encompassed them both.

It was Philip who spoke first. ‘Everything, sir. Ellie has strong opinions –  for a girl.’

‘And do you dislike her for that?’

‘Oh, no, we’re good friends.’

Mr Rogers nodded, turning his attention to Ellie. ‘I understand that you have been asked to leave your school for fighting. Will you tell me why that happened?’

‘Three girls said something I didn’t like, so I hit them.’ Ellie was rather taken aback by this conversation, casting a puzzled glance at her father. He was standing by the fireplace, his expression one of passive interest.

‘Did the show of aggression solve anything?’

‘Solve anything?’ Ellie had to think about that. The girls said even worse things about her afterwards, and she had been sent home in disgrace. ‘Well, I suppose not.’

‘I am pleased you recognise that.’ The tutor gave a nod of satisfaction. ‘There are other ways of dealing with such things, and we shall learn how to turn these situations to our advantage, by controlled and reasoned debate. Your father is very skilled in the art.’

‘I know,’ Ellie said proudly. ‘I would be very happy if you could teach me to be as wise.’

Mr Rogers turned to her father. ‘With your permission, sir, we shall begin lessons tomorrow at nine o’clock.’

‘Of course. My wife is resting at the moment, but you will join us for dinner this evening and meet her then,’ Albert told him. ‘Now, Eleanor and Philip, you will show Mr Rogers the schoolroom, and then help him to settle in the gatehouse.’

‘Yes, Father.’

Albert watched them leave the room, and as soon as the door closed behind them, he gave a worried sigh.

‘Why the frown, Albert?’ Henry asked. ‘He appears to be a wise choice for tutor.’

‘You heard the altercation in the other room?’

‘Yes, but that’s nothing unusual when they’re together. They don’t mean anything by it. Our children are fond of each other.’

‘I agree. However, when they were playing around Eleanor called Philip, Harry.’

Henry stopped in the act of reaching for the decanter. ‘Oh, Lord, that’s worrying. Has she remembered?’

‘No, she didn’t seem to know she had even done it, and said Philip was imagining things.’

‘Only we know he wasn’t.’ Henry sat down heavily. ‘She was only a little thing when she came here – far too young to remember her life before, so why should that name come out now?’

‘I can only think that Nanny may have triggered something in her mind when she called her Queenie.’

‘Eleanor told me about that. What are you going to do, Albert? She’s growing up, and it would be cruel if she did remember something of her past life. Will you tell her one day?’

‘I hate to admit it, but that may well be my unpleasant duty sooner than I had hoped. I am most uneasy about the appearance of these names from the past.’ Albert began to pace the room. ‘As you are aware, the doctors have given Mary a short time to live, and she has asked me not to say anything while she is still with us.’

‘My poor sister.’ Henry stared sadly at the fire. ‘But that leaves you with a heavy burden.’

‘Indeed it does.’ Albert poured them both a drink.

Later that day, Henry was dozing in one of the library chairs as Albert envied his brother-in-law’s ability to relax wherever he was. It was something he had never been able to do, and this afternoon he was too wound up even to sit still. It had shaken him badly to hear that Eleanor had called her cousin, Harry. He had thought her past was buried deep but it seemed that the memories might surface.

His insides clenched painfully as he tried to decide what to do. It would be desperate if she remembered on her own. He could just imagine the confusion and upset that it would cause her. If this had to come out into the open, then he wanted to be the one to tell her, and be with her to help her through the shock. But what if she didn’t remember – what then? He would surely do more harm than good by telling her. He had always prayed that that part of her life would remain hidden, but he was very much afraid that wasn’t going to happen now. And Mary was quite right, Eleanor had a right to know.

Oh God, what should he do?

Spinning on his heels away from the window, he strode out of the library, along the passage and up the stairs to his wife’s bedroom.

Opening the door quietly, he walked towards the bed. Mary was sound asleep, the deep purple under her eyes stark against the waxen skin. He knew she was
suffering, but he never heard her complain. He had consulted every physician he could find, but they all said the same thing – there was nothing that could be done. The miscarriages she had endured had done great damage to her health, and now disease had set in. He felt guilty about that, but she had so longed for a child. After the second loss he should have insisted they adopt and forget about having a child of their own, but she had begged him.

Running a hand through his hair, he took a deep breath. All the doctors could do now was keep increasing the medication to keep her as comfortable as possible, but he had been warned that it was only a matter of weeks – months at the most.

He walked softly out of the room. He couldn’t tell her about Eleanor calling Philip, Harry. He couldn’t do anything to upset the short time she had left with the daughter she loved so much – the daughter they both loved.

Utterly disconsolate, he went downstairs and knocked on Nanny’s door.

‘Come in.’

‘Hello, Nanny.’ He sat next to her. ‘How are you today? Do you have everything you need?’

‘I’m in better spirits than you, by the look on your face.’

His smile was wry. She always went straight to the point. ‘I need to talk to you.’

‘I’m listening.’

He then told her what had happened, wiping his hand
over his eyes when he had finished. ‘For the first time in my life I don’t know what to do.’

‘This is my fault.’ Nanny slapped the arm of her chair in annoyance. ‘When I called her Queenie, I had been remembering her as a little girl. It was a stupid slip of the tongue. I’m so sorry.’

‘You mustn’t feel like that,’ Albert said fondly. ‘When she came here, it was a traumatic time for her, and those memories, although forgotten over the years, must still be there.’

Nanny nodded. ‘I think you’ll have to watch her carefully, and if anything else like this happens, then you must tell her the whole story.’

Albert dipped his head, and then looked up again, anguish etched on his face. ‘I’m terrified of losing her.’

‘That’s a chance you will have to take, but I don’t believe that will happen. She will certainly be shocked and upset, but she loves you both very much, and I’d be surprised if the bond between you was broken.’

‘Do you think she will want to find her other family?’

‘Maybe, maybe not.’

‘That isn’t much help, Nanny. You know her better than anyone else.’

‘I still can’t tell you what she will do. Eleanor has a strong will, and may well want to see the people who sold her, even if it’s only to tell them what she thinks of them.’

Albert flinched.

Nanny watched him. ‘Yes, that still hurts, doesn’t it? How do you think Eleanor will feel when she finds out?’

‘It will tear her apart.’ Albert was on his feet, unable to remain in the chair. ‘She’s going to hate us when she finds out we bought her, and she mustn’t find out while Mary is still alive. I know I’m going to lose Mary soon, but if I also lose Eleanor it will destroy me.’

‘Come and sit down again.’ Nanny waited until he had perched on the edge of the chair, tension radiating from him. ‘Do you remember the first time you saw her?’

He nodded, a slight smile touching his lips.

‘You took her out to see the fish in the pond, and when you found out she wasn’t used to wearing shoes, you removed them, allowing her to run around in bare feet.’

A deep chuckle rumbled through him. ‘And she wanted to remove her undergarments as well.’

‘Yes, she was a bit disappointed when you refused that request.’

They both laughed then, remembering.

‘But you had taken off her hated shoes, and at that moment I believe she fell in love with you.’ Nanny leant forward and squeezed his arm. ‘When you came home after spending time in London, she would rush up to you, climb on your knees, and demand to be told what you had been doing. She giggled in delight when she heard about the fierce arguments that took place in Parliament. She was too young to understand what it was all about, but you were a good storyteller. She has always asked you to take her to London so she could see where you work, but you never have.’

‘I’ve always been afraid to in case she found it familiar and remembered.’

‘You won’t lose her. She adores you.’ Nanny spoke gently. ‘If you have to tell her, there will be difficult times ahead as she tries to come to terms with the revelation, but stay by her side, and you will both come through it. She hasn’t been the easiest child to bring up, but she has a good nature, and that is because of the love and affection you and the mistress have always shown her. When her boisterous side got her into trouble, which has been often, you’ve reprimanded her, and then forgiven her. She knows she is lucky to have understanding parents. If she does set out to find her other family, she will soon discover that she’s had a much better life with you than in the slums of London.’

‘I hope you’re right, Nanny.’ Albert stood up. ‘Thank you for talking this through with me.’

‘I’m always here if you need me. Have you told Eleanor how sick her mother is?’

‘No, Mary doesn’t want her to know.’ Albert shrugged helplessly. ‘But Eleanor’s not a fool. She knows how serious her mother’s health is.’

‘The mistress is entitled to conceal her illness as much as possible, if that is the way she wants it.’

Albert sighed again. ‘I don’t know how she keeps going, but she fairly sparkles at the dinner table, and no one would guess the severity of her suffering.’

‘She has a great deal of courage. Now –’ Nanny changed the subject – ‘don’t forget to send the new tutor to see me. I need to check that he is suitable.’

Albert tipped back his head and laughed freely for the first time that day. ‘I’ll bring him to see you this evening. I believe you will find him very suitable.’

‘He had better be, or Eleanor will have him running in circles.’

When Mr Rogers entered the schoolroom the next morning, Ellie and Philip stood up. ‘Good morning, sir,’ they chorused.

‘I hope you were comfortable in the gatehouse, sir.’ Ellie had taken an instant liking to the tutor when she had met him yesterday, and that was more than she could say about most of the teachers she had encountered.

A glint of amusement showed in Mr Roger’s eyes. ‘Very comfortable, thank you, Miss Warrender. And I do believe Nanny approves of me. Please sit down.’

Philip dug Ellie in the ribs when the tutor turned away from them, staring out at the garden, hands behind his back. ‘What’s he doing?’ he mouthed silently.

Ellie shrugged, and waited, easing her feet out of her shoes. He remained in that position for a minute or two,
and then faced them again. ‘It’s a pleasant day, so get your coats and we shall walk in the garden while you tell me what you have been learning. I want to know what you like and don’t like, and any subjects you would like included in your lessons. I shall then be able to set out a schedule for each of you.’

Philip was already on his feet, a smile of pleasure on his face, as Ellie struggled to get back into her shoes.

‘I’ll meet you by the lovely pond I can see from here, in five minutes.’

Neither of them liked being indoors for any length of time, whatever the weather, and in their haste to get out they collided in the doorway, each one fighting to get through first.

‘My goodness,’ Philip gasped, as he scrambled into his coat. ‘I think I’m going to like him. Is he really going to give us a choice of what we want to learn?’

‘Sounds like it, within reason, I expect.’ Ellie was ready and heading for the garden as fast as she could. The tutor had said five minutes, and she wasn’t going to take a second longer. This was an unexpected treat. She hadn’t been looking forward to spending hours in the schoolroom.

Lifting her skirt as she ran, with Philip right behind her, she wondered if Mr Rogers could ride. Lessons on horseback would be fun.

As they skidded to a halt in front of him, he glanced at his watch and nodded in approval. ‘This is a pleasant spot.’

‘Oh, yes.’ Ellie watched the brightly coloured fish swimming around. ‘It’s my favourite, along with the stables, of course. We have six horses. Do you ride, sir?’

‘I do, but I am not an expert. My mount has to be of a docile nature. Now, let us walk around the garden while you tell me all about yourselves. Before lunch we shall concentrate on getting to know each other, then this afternoon we will settle to the lessons.’

That was such good news that even Philip couldn’t stop smiling.

‘What are they doing in the garden, Albert?’ Mary asked.

‘I suspect young Rogers is getting them to talk about themselves in a more relaxed atmosphere than the schoolroom. I was told by his last employers – the Beresfords – that his methods are unconventional but effective.’

Mary slipped her hand through his arm. ‘He’s certainly caught their interest. Look at their animated faces.’

When she swayed slightly he caught her around the waist. ‘Sit down, my dear.’

Shaking her head, she leant against him, giving her usual reply. ‘I’m all right. A little spell of dizziness, but it has passed now.’

He knew it was more than that. This morning the physician had increased the medication again, and warned him that time was short. His wife would not be able to keep going for much longer. It was only her sheer determination keeping her on her feet. He supported her, allowing her the pleasure of watching Eleanor laughing happily in the pale autumn sunshine.

‘You must marry again, Albert. You are still young enough to father children, and perhaps have a male heir.’

He shook his head firmly. ‘I am forty-five now and have no wish for a young family. I have Eleanor, and she is the only heir I need.’

‘You were so angry when Henry and I brought her home. Do you remember?’

‘I was furious.’ Laughter rumbled through him. ‘Henry thought I was going to kill him.’

‘But it has all turned out well, hasn’t it?’ She gazed up at him, her eyes misted with tears. ‘She has brought us great joy.’

‘Indeed she has, and she’s growing into a fine young woman – when she isn’t brawling.’

His dry tone made Mary smile. ‘But it is always in a good cause. She finds injustice of any kind abhorrent.’

‘So do I, but I don’t roll up my sleeves and start throwing punches.’

‘And a very good thing that you don’t, Albert, or you would soon be thrown out of Parliament.’

‘True.’

‘Ah, they are moving away now, heading for the stables, no doubt.’ Mary sighed when they disappeared from sight. ‘How pretty she is. I’m sad that I shall not be around to arrange her coming-out, or have the joy of seeing her marry and have children of her own.’

‘If you take life at a steady pace and do as the doctor advises—’

‘No, Albert, I am not a fool. The pain is becoming harder and harder to control, and I am increasingly fatigued.’

Albert had never felt so helpless. What could he say? Mary knew what was happening to her.

‘I am aware that I must leave you and Eleanor soon. No woman could have asked for a finer husband. I was not able to bear the children you so badly wanted. You could have cast me aside and married someone else, but you never did. I have been blessed to have your love. I have left you the burden of telling Eleanor that we adopted her, but I’m sure it will not make any difference to the love she feels for you. Don’t stay in mourning too long; a month is quite long enough, for you know how I dislike sombre clothes and faces. I shall not be here for Eleanor’s eighteenth birthday, but I ask you to see that the occasion is celebrated with friends, music and laughter.’

‘I’ll do all you say, Mary, but you will be able to make the arrangements yourself.’ Albert tried to look confident, but it was hard. The doctor’s prognosis this morning had been grim.

‘Perhaps. Now, I’ll go and rest before lunch.’

‘I’ll help you to your room.’

‘There’s no need, Molly is waiting upstairs for me.’ She reached up and kissed his cheek. ‘I’ll let you know when walking is too much for me.’

He watched her leave the room, head high, and step sure. He marvelled yet again at her cheerful fortitude, and her immense courage. He was very concerned about the conversation they’d just had. It was almost as if she were putting her affairs in order. He hated to see her suffering like this, but he also dreaded the thought of losing her. It was coming though. She knew it, and, if he was honest, so did he.

Turning away from the window he went to his study to write a speech, and possibly an important letter. He was
seriously considering resigning his seat in the House of Commons. It wasn’t a decision to be taken lightly as he had gained a lot of satisfaction in his years in Parliament, and there was still much he wanted to achieve, but he was needed here. Mary’s illness was now severe and he had to stay near her. He would never forgive himself if she died while he was away. And when that day came, Eleanor was going to need him. The future was uncertain, making it hard for him to concentrate on his work.

Sitting behind the huge oak desk, he rotated his shoulders, trying to ease the tension, and then closed his eyes, bowing his head. He was a wealthy man and could find plenty to occupy him around the estate. Also, Henry was urging that they go into business together and buy a swath of forest a few miles away. It was full of good timber, and if they replanted new trees to replace those being felled, it could be a profitable venture for some time to come. And land was always a good investment.

With his mind made up, he lifted his head and reached for paper and pen. It was time to make the change.

Albert had been working for about two hours when the door burst open, and the maid, Molly, rushed in. One glance at her stricken face and he was immediately on his feet.

‘Oh, sir, come quick. It’s the mistress …’

He didn’t wait to hear any more, but ran to his wife’s room as fast as he could, with Molly right behind him.

One look at Mary was enough. ‘Send one of the grooms for the physician. And don’t delay! And get a message to her brother, as well!’

The maid ran out, tears of fright running down her face. Albert could hear her thumping down the stairs, already calling for help. He prayed that Doctor Brewster would hurry. He sat on the bed, cradling his wife in his arms.

‘I’ve sent for the doctor, my dear. He’ll soon be here to give you something for the pain. Hold on to me.’

She was soaking wet with perspiration and curled into a tight ball as she fought the pain. Her hands gripped his arm, and if he hadn’t been wearing a jacket her fingers would have pierced his flesh. She was in agony.

It seemed a lifetime before the doctor arrived, but in fact it could not have been more than twenty minutes. ‘Give her something,’ he ground out between clenched teeth.

Albert stayed exactly where he was, watching the doctor work. In a mercifully short time he felt Mary relax, and he settled her back on the pillows. She was conscious, just about, but she was still in pain, albeit more bearable.

‘Can’t you put her right out?’ Albert’s hand was shaking as he ran it over his wife’s hair. Mary shouldn’t have to suffer like this. She was, and always had been, a good woman.

Doctor Brewster led him to the other side of the room, and spoke softly. ‘I have given her as much medication as I dare at this moment. Any more and it will end her life.’

‘How much time has she got?’

‘Twenty-four hours at the most.’

‘Then I ask you to stay and see that she does not have to endure such pain again.’ Albert looked across the room at his wife. ‘You must do whatever needs to be done to keep her free from pain. I will not have her last hours a torment. Do you hear?’

When the doctor nodded in agreement, Albert returned to his wife. Her eyes were open.

‘Ask Molly to wash and change me.’ Her speech was slurred, but she was aware of her dishevelled appearance. ‘Then I want to see Eleanor.’

‘Of course, my dear.’ He bent and kissed her forehead. ‘Doctor Brewster is going to stay for a while and make sure you are comfortable.’

She nodded weakly. ‘Eleanor.’

‘I’ll fetch her as soon as Molly has finished.’

The maid was hovering outside the door, so Albert told her what was needed, and then made his way up to the schoolroom.

Taking a deep, steadying breath, he opened the door and walked in. ‘I apologise for interrupting you, Mr Rogers, but Eleanor’s mother is unwell and is asking for her.’

Ellie leapt to her feet, rushing over to her father. ‘Is she bad, Father? Is the doctor with her?’

When she turned to leave the room he caught hold of her arm. ‘Don’t rush. Molly is making her comfortable before you see her, and yes, the doctor is with her.’

‘You look awful, Father.’ Ellie was trembling now, fully aware just how sick her mother had become over the last year.

‘I was talking to her but a short time ago, and her collapse has come as a shock. We knew this was going to happen, Eleanor, but I had refused to admit that it could be so soon.’

Ellie gulped. ‘Can we go to her now?’

He nodded. ‘My apologies again, Mr Rogers.’

‘I understand, sir.’

Albert had to keep a firm grip on his daughter to stop her running to her mother. As ill as she was, Mary would be upset if she was seen in anything but a clean and tidy state. When Ellie saw her mother she nearly cried out in dismay. She had seen her at breakfast, and although pale, she had talked to them quite normally. The change was terrible.

As her father squeezed her shoulder in support, she gazed up at him, shocked. ‘She was all right this morning.’

‘No, she wasn’t. The doctor had increased her medication again, giving her enough relief to join us. Your mother has made a valiant effort to keep going, but the end is near, and we must prepare ourselves for that.’ He slipped an arm around her. ‘Come, she has been asking for you.’

They went over to the bed and Ellie knelt down, taking her mother’s hand in both of hers, struggling to keep the tears at bay.

‘Eleanor.’ Mary opened her eyes, although it was clearly an effort, then she smiled. ‘I shall be leaving you soon …’

‘No, Mother!’ Ellie cried in dismay.

‘Shush, do not upset yourself. It is best, for I can endure no more of this.’

Ellie bowed her head and kissed her mother’s hand. ‘What am I to do without you?’

‘You will have your father. Look after him, darling. He is a good man. Promise me.’

‘I promise.’

‘There is one more thing I would ask of you.’

‘Anything, Mother.’

‘If you hear anything about something your father and I did some years ago, I want you to remember that we love you dearly. We could not have had a daughter we were more proud of. From the moment you arrived we adored you. You have brought great joy into our lives. Remember we have always loved and wanted you.’

Mary shuddered, absolutely spent, and Albert leant over the bed. ‘No more talking, my dear, try to sleep now. We’ll be right here when you awake.’

As her mother slipped into a drugged sleep, Ellie glanced at her father, distressed and confused. ‘What was she trying to say? It didn’t make sense. I know you both love me, so why does Mother want me to remember that? Nothing would ever make me forget.’

‘I pray that you don’t.’ Her father closed his eyes for a moment, tired and drawn.

Ellie smoothed a lock of hair away from her mother’s face. ‘Will you tell me what it was you did that is worrying her so much?’

‘If you really want to know then I’ll tell you one day.’ Albert drew up two chairs for them to sit on. ‘But this is not the time, Eleanor.’

‘No, of course not.’ Ellie was too distressed to pursue the subject. And, with all the medication the doctor had given her, Mother was probably not talking complete sense anyway.

It was a long night’s vigil. Ellie, her father and Uncle Henry stayed by the bed, refusing to move for anything. The entire household was awake, knowing this night could only
end in one way – the death of the gentle mistress they all admired and respected.