The Way We Were (8 page)

“I wanted to get out of the house. Opal’s fine with Jared.”
Saying his name caused an image to form: the glimmer in his eyes when he pulled back from her not even an hour ago.

She turned to Mark. “Mark Milburn, this is my sister Paulina.”

“Nice to meet you.”

“Her husband designed the music hall and all this…” she gestured to the model. “And Paulie’s building it.”

“Seriously?”

“Yeah.” Paulina shook back her hair. “My other sister and
I own a contracting business. We snagged the bid.” She grinned. “And I got him.”

Adam was walking toward them. Tall, well-built and dashingly handsome, he was also a great guy. “Hello, Ana,” he said, kissing her on the cheek.

Introductions were made.

“Did you two meet on this project?” Mark asked.

“We did.” He slid an arm around Paulina’s waist in that possessive way men have.
“The best day of my life.”

“Is it finished?”

“The outside is. The innards are complicated because of the acoustics. Special builders have to construct that. We’re handling everything else.”

“When will it be done?” Ana asked.

“Probably another year.” Adam angled his head to the model. “Have you had a chance to check out the garden?”

“No.”

“Come on, I’ll show you.” They found
an open spot at the display, and Adam gazed down at the replica. “We have ten pieces contracted so far. Three are donated, but the others are commissioned, hence this last fundraiser.”

Ana peered down at it. Tiny sculpture stands dotted the grassy area of the model. They were labeled with the name of the artist. Her gaze went to Paulie. “Rafe’s doing a sculpture?”

“Yeah. Nia said he’s
dabbled in it in the past. He wanted to sculpt one for our garden and also expose Sal to the art form.” Nia’s only child was a child prodigy in drawing and painting.

“Who’s Rafe?” Mark asked.

“Rafael Castle. The modern artist.”

Paulina giggled. “Who happens to be my twin sister’s boyfriend.”

“Your family is certainly interesting.”

“Hmm. Anyone else here yet? Nia’s coming, right?”

“She texted to say they’d be a little late. But Caterina’s over there with Aidan and one of his brothers.”

Mark shook his head. “Another sister?”

“Yeah. Her husband is former president Clay Wainwright’s brother-in-law.”

“Hell,” Mark said, “my head’s spinning. The cast of characters in your life is unbelievable.”

“Let’s go say hi. Adam and Paulina need to talk to prospective
donors.”

Aidan and Caterina, or CJ as the O’Neils called her, had found a table in the corner. Tonight she was in silver sequins that accented her long, lithe form. A matching clip held back one side of her hair. “Hey, Cat. You look beautiful.”

“Thanks. I don’t get to dress up like this much.”

Aidan raised his brows wolfishly. “Which is a cryin’ shame, darlin’.”

“Mark Milburn,
meet my sister Caterina and her husband, Aidan. I work with Mark at the college.”

He moved in closer, surprising Ana. “And a friend, I hope. A close friend.”

Yikes.
“Of course.”

“Hey, all.” The voice came from behind Ana. She turned to find Patrick O’Neil, the oldest of the O’Neil clan, and his wife, Brie, both of whom Ana had met several times. Patrick was handsome in a navy suit
and light blue shirt that accented his eyes. Brie wore a stunning emerald dress.

Brie smiled at them. “Ana, hello. Lovely to see you again.”

Patrick kissed Ana’s cheek. “Hi, Ana. You look beautiful.” Tonight, he seemed to exude contentment. Ana knew he and his wife had had a troubled marriage. They’d split several times. They’d never divorced, though, like Ana and Jared. Finally, they’d
reunited permanently after a terrible kidnapping, when a former boyfriend of Brie’s went off the deep end.

After which, Brie sought counseling.

You could get therapy. We could go together.

All of a sudden, Ana’s situation stood out in stark relief. Brie had had the courage to seek help in order to make her life work for her and her husband. And Ana had not.

She felt like the worst
kind of coward.

Later, Ana was at one of the wine-and-cheese stations alone when someone came up behind her. “Hi, again.”

Ana turned. “Oh, Brie. Getting food or drink?”

“Both. Could we talk for a minute?” She stepped away and stood near a column that afforded some privacy. Ana joined her.

“I wanted to mention that I’ve been on a job in Brooklyn. Near the college where you work.”

“Maybe we can have lunch sometime.”

“Ana, I’ll meet you anywhere, anytime. I’m sorry, but it slipped out of CJ that she asked for my counselor’s number for you.”

“That’s all right. It doesn’t matter if you know.”

“What about getting together?”

“I’d like to.” She thought of Jared. “I’ll call you.”

Reaching out, Brie squeezed her arm. “I hope so. Maybe talking to someone who
isn’t close to you can help you see some options.”

“Thank you, Brie.”

And she meant that. She was grateful for the woman’s candor. If Brie could talk about the time she was kidnapped, Anna should be able see a counselor about what happened to her after the guys’ deaths.

Letter #7

Dear Annie,

Please, please go to therapy with me. I know you haven’t talked to your
sisters about what’s going on. But our estrangement gets stronger by the day. I’m feeling so alienated from you that I ache with it. And now, you won’t even let me touch you. I promise I can be patient in this, but you have to let me in. And I don’t think you can do that alone. For the first time in fifteen years, I’m frightened of losing you completely.

Opal went to school on Monday of the next week and Ana headed into work. Jared stayed home, ready now to tackle a draft of chapter three of his book: “The Relevance of The Scarlet Letter Today.” Leaning back, he stared at the cursor blinking on an empty page. But, instead of concentrating on the material he’d already gathered in his notebook, Jared’s mind reeled
back to the past few days.

Kissing Ana the night of her date had kept him from falling asleep. He’d watched a movie with Opal, but was wide awake when Ana came in around midnight. He ordered himself not to get up, even as he threw back the covers, put on pajama bottoms and opened the spare bedroom’s door…

He called out so he wouldn’t scare her, “Ana?”

“Yes, it’s me.” She’d spoken softly,
but he could hear the sweet lilt of her voice. Soon, she reached the top of the steps. “What are you doing up?”

“Couldn’t sleep.” He leaned back against the doorjamb and perused her in the damned sexy red outfit.

“I see.” She bumped a hip against the hall table. “Why?”

He’d run his fingers through his hair. “Take a wild guess.”

“You shouldn’t have kissed me.”

“Ha! No insomnia
is ever going to convince me of that, sweetheart.”

A small smile, one she couldn’t seem to help. “You’re something else, Dr. Creswell.”

Pushing away from the door, he took steps toward her. She couldn’t back up, but she lifted her chin. Her eyes glittered with defiance and a lot more. She said, “I’m not afraid of you.”

“I don’t want you to be afraid of
us
, Annie.” His voice was a soft
whisper in the dimly lit hallway.

“That will take a while.”

“Do you honestly think we shouldn’t have kissed?”

“No, I wanted to.” She sighed. “We have to be careful that we don’t push this, though. I’d hate for things to be awkward between us now.”

“Me, too. How about this? I won’t initiate anything. When you’re ready for more physical contact, let me know.”

“It’s a deal…”

They’d had a nice few days. They took Opal out for a ride, gone to a movie, where they ate buttery popcorn and stopped for hot chocolate afterward. They’d taught Ana to play a video game, which had been hilarious. Jared had almost forgotten that life had once been like this: easy, centered on the family, being together simply because they wanted to share their lives.

Then, she’d surprised
him by coming to the spare room last night. He’d been in bed, reading a new biography of Herman Melville. When he heard the knock, told her to come in, he’d hoped like hell this was good news…

“Everything okay?”

She was dressed in satiny, navy blue pajamas. His hand itched to touch the material. Her. “Uh-huh.” She sat on the end of the bed, far away. “We had a good few days, Jared. I didn’t
feel awkward. But we should talk about you moving out of the house.”

Slipping his glasses off, he rested them on his book. “Why? Opal may still need to be picked up from school. I should be here to go get her.” He added, “Unless you want her at my house for a while.”

“You know you could be available if you moved back into your own place.”

He’d taken a big risk by asking, “Do you want
me to move out of our house, Annie?”

“Do
you
want to?”

“No. I think I should stay and see these new…developments between us through.”

“It’s going to take a lot longer than you’d stay here. Months, at least.”

“I see.”

“But to answer your question, no, I don’t want you to go.” She bit her lip. “We should admit to ourselves what we’re doing. Not pretend you
have
to stay here.
Not pretend that things aren’t in flux.”

“That’s fine by me. Honesty being the best…” He drifted off and could have kicked himself for the reference.

“We can’t ignore that you cheated, either, Jared. I’ve admitted my part in our breakup. The fact that you turned to someone else is yours. It still hurts to think about you with another woman. You weren’t…since you met me.”

“I know it
hurts. And while we’re being honest, you making love to another man, even though we weren’t together, drove me crazy.”

She’d cocked her head, but held his gaze. “I haven’t.”

“Haven’t what?”

“Been with anyone else.”

He pushed his book to the side, came to his knees, inched over to her and sat on his haunches in front of her. “I can’t believe it.” He tipped up her chin. “I thought
for sure you dated.”

“Some. None of them ever got anywhere.”

Briefly, he closed his eyes. “You can’t possibly know how happy that makes me.”

“I thought you should know. Was there…anyone else after her?”

“No.”

“You’re telling the truth, right?”

“I am. The only time I ever lied to you in our whole lives was when I cheated.”

“We have to be honest with each other now, if
I’m ever going to trust you again. Totally honest.”

“I will. I promise….”

Today, the memory of that exchange and of how she rose up on her knees, linked their fingers together and leaned over to kiss him was still with him. Something about only their mouths touching had made the encounter incredibly hot.

“Ah,” he said to the computer, then shook himself. “Now to Nate.”

He began
by listing the areas of the book that kids might relate to: betrayal by someone close to you—infidelity; trickery to get what you want; spoiled kids; guilt and shame; the judgment of others. Hmm, he’d set this section up thematically. Though the kids might not relate to the eighteenth century, human behavior and interactions hadn’t changed.

Frowning, he stared at the list. Might as well get
this over with—he’d start with adultery. Students would be familiar with cheating on mates, others cheating on them, family members cheating.

Damn it. He didn’t want to think about that. About his own failure at fidelity. About what he’d done to Ana. It took Herculean effort to suppress it, and he lost himself in the book for two hours. Then he took a break and clicked into his email.

Fuck!

Sofia would say this was karma.

Hawthorne would use it as situational irony.

In the subject line of the email was:
from Valerie. Please read!

Valerie Ashford. The woman with whom he’d betrayed his wife. God, he didn’t want this. But he had to read her note.

Dear Jared,

I suspect that contacting you after two years will surprise you, and quite frankly this is
difficult for me, but I have some things to tell you. As you know, I left Brooklyn after our affair ended. I won’t mince words, I was leveled when you sent me away. I still think you were mistaken to do so, and since you haven’t reconciled with your wife in that time, I’m probably right. But that isn’t my motivation for doing what follows.

I’ve been working in administration at Kings Junior
College and due to retirements, there will be three tenure-track positions opening in two years. I have the ear of the staff and the admissions personnel and I’m told I’d have a better than average chance of getting one of the teaching spots if I earn my master’s degree within that time. Since Mount Mary recently implemented a graduate program, starting in August, I applied and got in. In other
words, I’ll be at the college for a school year and a summer. You’re probably wondering why I chose Mount Mary. For the program, which is good and can be completed in fifteen months.

But know that above and beyond those reasons, it seems like the time to face you again. I love you, Jared, I have for the years we’ve been apart. Nothing has changed for me. Would I like to pick up where we left
off? Of course. I’ll contact you when I reach campus for summer orientation. Think about it. Valerie.

Ana said to her committee, “Thanks for your time today. It’s nearly three. I’d like to finish by five, so we can get out of here at a decent hour.” She glanced through the window of the admissions conference room. It would be dark soon. Sometimes, she hated winter. “Each of
you has a list of students who are interested in your subject area, though they’ll all come in as liberal arts majors. Let’s start with Language Arts. Rob, you first.” He was filling in for Jared as English department chair and had consulted with her husband on this matter.

Rob began with the names of the students they’d chosen to accept. Other chairpersons chimed in. Some had picked the same
person.