United State of Love (9 page)

‘Mark! What are you doing here?’

‘Hello, Anna,’ replied Mark casually. ‘Fancy seeing you here. Hello, Zoe. Lovely to see you.’

‘Likewise,’ said Zoe, who clearly didn’t mean it.

Mark moved to Anna’s side and smiled at everyone. ‘Hope I’m not interrupting anything, but I just popped in for a drink and saw my wife here. What a coincidence.’ He grinned at Anna and, putting a proprietorial arm around her shoulder, pulled her towards him. Anna tried to wriggle away but Mark’s hand was holding her firm.

‘Oh, so you’re Anna’s husband,’ said Christine.

‘Certainly am,’ said Mark with satisfaction, then to Anna, ‘We need to talk.’

‘Here? Now?’ Anna jerked her head away from Mark and glanced at Tex.

Tex watched silently, his face impassive, and although he was neither smiling nor scowling, there was an unmistaken hardened look to his eyes that matched the tension in his voice. ‘Don’t let us interrupt you. We are leaving anyway.’

Anna couldn’t help but feel disappointed at the rather warmer goodbye Tex directed at Zoe than the mere nod of the head proffered at her. She watched as the quartet left, Christine flashing a self-satisfied smile in her direction. Anna found herself looking daggers in response.

‘Hope it wasn’t anything I said,’ grinned Mark, with what Anna could only describe as temerity.

‘What’s with introducing yourself as my husband?’ Irritated didn’t even come close to how she felt towards Mark.

Mark finally released his hold, looking all innocent. ‘What’s wrong with that? I am your husband, after all.’

‘You know perfectly well what’s wrong with that. Anyway, what’s so important that it can’t wait until I get home or tomorrow? I am actually having a night out with Zoe.’

‘It looked more than a night out with Zoe. Who’s that bloke you came back in with?’

‘Just my client.’

‘Just your client, eh?’

‘Yes.’

‘If you say so.’

‘I do.’

‘Not the same client that gave you a lift home the other day by any chance?’

‘Piss off, Mark,’ she snapped.

Mark held her gaze for a moment before turning to Zoe. ‘You couldn’t give us a minute, could you?’

Zoe looked questioningly at Anna, who rolled her eyes. ‘I’ll just be at the bar then.’ Zoe picked up her bag and edged past her brother-in-law.

‘Well?’ said Anna, impatiently turning on Mark.

‘Let’s sit down.’ He gestured towards the seats. ‘That’s better. Look, I was just out for a drink. I forgot you said you’d be here, but when I saw you with
your client
, I was, well, hurt.’

‘Hurt?’

‘Yeah, like shocked. Jealous, I suppose.’

‘Jealous?’

‘Blimey, Anna, it’s like having a conversation with an echo.’ Mark let out a sigh. ‘You know how I feel about you, I told you the other night. You said you were going to think about things. Since then you’ve avoided me like a dose of the clap.’

‘Mark, this isn’t the time either,’ said Anna gently.

‘See, you’re doing it again. You’re avoiding the issue. Avoiding us.’

Anna took a deep breath. ‘There is no “us”. I told you that the other day. Getting back together just isn’t an option anymore. If anything, we should be looking to make our separation official. Taking it a step further. Divorce.’

‘Divorce?’ Mark sat back, as if the word had been spat at him. ‘You want a divorce? Where the fuck did that idea come from? We’ve never talked about divorce before. Never.’

‘Maybe it’s about time we did,’ said Anna carefully. She could see a muscle beginning to twitch in his jaw, tension visible in his neck, spreading down through his shoulders, reaching his hands as he balled and unballed his fists. A familiar sign that an explosion of temper was on the way.

‘No!’ Mark shouted the word. People at a nearby table turned round to look briefly. His next words were quieter but still as forceful. ‘I’m not agreeing to a divorce.’ With that, he stood up and marched out of the pub.

‘Do you want me to come in with you?’ asked Zoe as they came to a stop outside Anna's house later that evening.

Anna shook her head. ‘No, I'll be okay, but thanks anyway.’ She looked towards the house which was in total darkness. ‘Either Mark's not back yet or he's asleep. Either way, I'm glad. I have no intention of getting into a row with him tonight about anything, least of all a divorce.’

‘It's about time you divorced him anyway,’ said Zoe. ‘Neither Nathan nor I can understand why you’ve never pursued it.’

‘I know. I know,’ replied Anna ruefully, well aware how keen they were for her to divorce Mark. ‘It's just, well, it's like admitting you've failed at something. When you get divorced you even get a certificate to prove that you've been a total failure. It's been easier to ignore it than to confront it. Not only that, but I've never felt it necessary.’

‘So you definitely don’t want to get back with Mark?’

Anna shook her head. ‘It won’t work. We’ve tried before but it never has. I don’t know why this time would be any different. I was going to speak to Mark but I wasn’t quite ready. It just sort of came out tonight.’

‘It's amazing what a new love interest can do for you,’ smiled Zoe, ignoring Anna’s protests that Tex wasn’t a love interest nor could possibly be one. ‘Oh look, this must be my taxi. Thanks for tonight. I really enjoyed getting out for a couple of hours, although I am seriously knackered now.’

Fortunately, Mark was asleep on the sofa when Anna crept in and upstairs. As she reached the landing, she could see the flickering light of the TV coming from under the door of Luke's room. Anna gently knocked on the door. No answer. Luke must have fallen asleep watching it. She crept in and switched off the television.

‘I wasn't asleep,’ came Luke's voice, slightly muffled by the duvet.

‘Oh, sorry, I thought you were. Do you want the telly back on?’

‘No,’ said Luke abruptly, sitting up and flicking on his bedside light. ‘Dad said you were out with a man.’

Anna eyed her son carefully. Impossible to tell what he was thinking.

‘What else did he say?’ she asked, giving an inward sigh. Mark had obviously come home and stirred things up already. Luke shrugged. Anna chose her words carefully. ‘I went out with Zoe and we briefly met my boss, his wife, my client and another woman.’

‘Dad didn't seem to think it was just that. I think he was a bit upset to be honest, seeing you with another man.’

‘It wasn't exactly like that,’ said Anna patiently. She sat down on the edge of Luke's bed. ‘You know we’ve always been honest with each other. If there was anything significant to tell you, then I would.’

Luke nodded. ‘I know.’

‘There may well come a time when I meet someone else. I wouldn’t like to think I’ll be on my own forever.’ She rested her hand on Luke’s shoulder. ‘Your dad could just as easily meet someone too.’

‘I suppose so.’

‘Now you really should go to sleep, it's late. I'll see you in the morning. We can always talk more then, when we're not so tired.’ She gave Luke a hug and a kiss. ‘Night. Love you.’

‘Love you too, Mum.’

Saturday morning was tense, the atmosphere between Anna and Mark positively Arctic.

‘This is pleasant. Not!’ said Luke, sitting down at the table. ‘What's that saying about cutting the air with a knife?’

‘Just what I was thinking,’ commented Mark as he continued texting without looking up. An awkward silence followed and then Mark spoke again, this time more brightly. ‘Hey, Luke, fancy going to watch Chelsea play Wigan tomorrow? A mate of mine's got some tickets. It's at Stamford Bridge. We can meet him and his son there.’

‘Definitely,’ said Luke without a moment's hesitation. ‘That would be brilliant. Cheers, Dad.’

Anna couldn’t help feeling slightly peeved at Luke’s enthusiastic response to Mark’s suggestion. She then checked herself. She wanted Luke to have a good relationship with his father, so she should be pleased they were getting along.

‘That will be nice,’ she forced herself to say.

‘It will be brilliant. I'm going out now,’ said Luke, getting up from the table. ‘Going to meet Jacob. See you later.’

Anna waited until Luke was safely out of the house before she spoke.

‘Mark. Can we talk?’

‘Before you say anything, can you just listen to me first?’ Mark put his phone down and pushed his plate to the middle of the table. ‘I know I’ve been a shit in the past and I am sorry. You know that, don’t you?’

Anna nodded. ‘Yes, I know.’ She knew that Mark was sorry, he had always been sorry, but ultimately it had never changed anything. He had continued to behave the same.

‘I’ve done a lot of thinking while I’ve been in the States,’ Mark continued, his fingers twitching. ‘At first, I was glad to be away. Things were so difficult between us, it was a relief to be several thousand miles away. But I never stopped thinking about you, Anna, never stopped loving you. I’ve missed you. I meant what I said when I first came back. I’ve changed. I’m not like I used to be. I’ve grown up. I really want us to try again.’

He looked and sounded so sincere, Anna felt she could almost believe him, but she knew they couldn’t go back to how things had been. That was too awful to contemplate. Maybe Mark had changed, but so had she.

‘When you first went to America, I wasn’t sure how I was going to manage,’ said Anna gently. ‘I hadn’t been on my own since I was nineteen. I was devastated our marriage was in the state it was, it was the last thing I wanted. But after you left, I discovered I was more capable than I thought. I like where I am now and I don’t mean in the physical sense. I don’t want to go backwards. Us getting back together would be doing that. I just want to go forwards, and that means divorce. I’m sorry, Mark.’

Anna stood up and rinsed her cup in the sink. She felt awful saying that but it was true and she had to be honest with Mark. She couldn’t let him think there was any chance of them getting back together, that wouldn’t be fair.

Mark came and stood beside her. ‘I'm not agreeing to a divorce. You'll have to divorce me.’

‘Why are you being so difficult? Why do you want to stay married?’ Anna waited for a response but was met with silence. She looked thoughtfully out of the window at the buddleia bobbing in the spring breeze, before adding defiantly, ‘I'll get some advice. I'm sure I have grounds for divorce whether you agree to it or not.’

‘Do you really want to drag our marriage through the courts? Do you really want Luke to find out all the details? Do you really want it splashed across the papers?’

‘What are you on about, the papers?’ Anna turned to face him. ‘The newspapers aren’t going to be interested in a divorce between an ex-footballer and his wife. Remember, I pre-date the WAG scene. No one's interested in me.’

‘No, but they might be a bit more interested when they find out the co-defendant is making a name for himself in the restaurant world, has a Michelin star, and is hoping to open a restaurant in Arundel.’ Mark spoke with a coolness that made her shudder involuntarily. ‘Yes, Anna, the papers might take a bit more of an interest then and I don't know how that will affect his business. Wouldn't want it to have a negative effect, would we? And in case you're wondering how I know all about Mr Garcia, it's amazing what you can learn from a file being left lying around on the table for anyone to read. That and Google.’

‘I can't believe you did that!’ Anna cried. ‘You've been looking at my work files. They are confidential.’

‘If they were that private you should have put them away.’

Anna took a deep breath. ‘Mr Garcia is a client. Nothing else. Besides, that sort of news isn’t really headline is it?’

‘True, but there is a bit of a hoo-ha about his restaurant. You know, locals opposing it. This will just taint his reputation a bit further.’

‘You need to do your homework better, Mark. Most of the locals are for the restaurant now. Anyway, it’s all publicity and will only get people talking about the restaurant all the more. In fact, people will be dying to see who this notorious chef is, so your plan may well backfire.’ Anna couldn’t keep the triumph out of her voice. Now she had him on the back foot. She took another deep breath, hoping to install some confidence in herself before she spoke again. ‘I don’t want you living here anymore. There's plenty of bed and breakfast places around or you could go and stay with one of your friends. But I think your staying with me has run its course.’

‘I’m not going anywhere,’ said Mark. ‘It's my house and I'm not leaving. Besides, I don’t think Luke will be happy if you kick me out.’

‘Don't you dare bring Luke into this,’ Anna snapped. She fought hard to keep her breathing under control so she didn't stammer over her words. ‘You've done enough damage. Don't you even think about trying to set me up as the bad one. I've always been very decent about you to our son. I've never once run you down to him, so don't you try and play games with me and make out that I'm letting him down. I did everything I could to make our family work. I didn't ruin our marriage.’

‘No, but you ruined my career.’ There was a hard, callous tone in his voice. He stood up, towering over her. ‘Because of you, I had to give up football.’

‘That's so unfair,’ cried Anna. ‘I was only driving because you were too drunk. I didn't even want to go to that party but you insisted. If I'd known before it was only because you were shagging the hostess, I would never have agreed to go in the first place.’

‘And if you hadn't been so bloody miserable and insisted that we had to leave the party because you were worried about being late for the babysitter, then we could have stayed the night and I could have driven back the following morning. Safely. But no, we had to leave, didn't we?’

‘We had to leave because you were so drunk you were practically fawning over Melanie Wilson in front of her husband. You made it so obvious that you and her were at it.’ Anna held on to the side of the worktop. ‘Anyway, that's typical of you, that you can only think about yourself. That car accident put me in hospital for five days, killed our unborn baby and meant that I could never have children again. Don't you think I've relived that evening over and over again. Thinking if only? What if? Wishing I could change what happened. Don't you think both of us have suffered because of that night? It was a combination of events and decisions. So don't you dare lay all the blame at my door.’