Unstuck (24 page)

“Morning,” I said going to the dining room, gave him the paper and poured a cup of coffee. He downed it not caring it was scorching hot. I poured a second one.

“Good Morning,” he finally said.

“Breakfast?” I asked and he shook his head.

“Ok,” I nodded and went inside. No breakfast that meant bad mood. He was not having his favorite meal.

“No breakfast,” I said and Miranda widened her eyes. I grabbed a thermos and poured the rest of the coffee in it. “Happy Sunday,” I said to Miranda and she laughed “I’ll see you tomorrow,” I said hugging her and went to the dining room.

“Ready to go,” I said sitting next to him. He was not even reading the newspaper, he was looking straight ahead to the trees, I guessed.

“Yeah, let’s go,” he said nodding.

We walked to the SUV, I said good morning to Mike and Patrick climbed in it just saying “Shopping.”

“Here,” I said once the car was moving and gave him the thermos.

“Thanks,” he said drinking the coffee. Once I saw Post-Coffee Patrick appear I decided I could talk. “So, I was thinking,” I said and Patrick raised his brows. At least he was already joking. Silently, but joking.

“I was thinking,” I continued and he took another sip of his coffee “you’ve been having horrible, horrible morning moods,” he nodded “So,” I continued “I think I know why is that.”

“You do?” he asked surprised.

“Yes, you need to get laid again,” I said nodding and Patrick laughed.

“No, Pepper, I need to relax, that’s what I need,” he shook his head. “I should have eaten something.”

“Here,” I said pulling a granola bar from my purse.

“Life saver, as always,” he said smiling and he sank his teeth on the peanut butter granola bar I had brought with me.

“What do you think, Pepper?” Patrick asked while looking at himself in the mirror wearing a winter coat. The 5
th
winter coat he tried on. “I like it, like the ones before, but may I suggest you to buy one in each color? You’ve chosen all in black,” He turned to look at the bunch of coats he had said yes to and realized they were all in black indeed.

“Cynthia could you please bring these in other colors?” he asked the girl that for the past hour had been red as a beet every time Patrick said something to her. She nodded and went to look for whatever Patrick asked for.

“Seriously, Patrick, how do you manage to have a decent wardrobe?” I asked smiling. He smiled back.

“My assistants do all the shopping,” he shrugged.

“Then, why are we here?” I asked confused.

“I don’t know. I thought it would be a nice change,” in that moment Cynthia came back with a rack of coats in different colors. I just wished they were different styles but I wasn’t going to find that out because I took that moment to make a trip to shoe department.

“Where are you going, Pepper? I need you here,” he said as Cynthia helped him with a brown coat.

“I need to go get your socks and underwear,” he nodded looking surprised. I was pretty sure he had no idea I bought those for him. He probably believed in the boxer and sock fairy and I’d just burst the bubble.

Once in the shoe department I frantically looked for a pair of gala shoes to replace the ones he used. They were looking too worn in comparison to the ones grandma gave him. What was with the shoes? I had to ask him sometime. To look for the exact kind of shoes was difficult, I actually had to go to storage with the dude from shoes to look for the exact model and I had to do it quick because I had to go and get the underwear and socks. Still, I managed to get the shoes and the underwear.

When I got to Patrick he was already in the vests department. Seemed that he was a winter vest kind of guy. “How about this, Lucinda?” he asked wearing a red winter vest. I liked it, he looked good in red.

“I like it , Patrick. Red might be your color,” I said smiling and he nodded to Cynthia. There was a ringing phone somewhere and it was annoying. I kept looking around to see who was the horrible person that would let their phone ring. I found Patrick looking at me weird. I shrugged and he raised his eyebrows.

“I think it’s you, Pepper,” he said looking at my purse. I opened my purse and yes, the ringing came from there; it was my personal phone. It had been so long since I used it that I forgot what an annoying ringtone it had.

“Shit, it’s my mom,” I said looking at the screen and immediately felt tears in my eyes. I looked up and Patrick was looking at the phone.

“Get it,” he said looking as scared as I was feeling. I shook my head. I was scared I knew there was nothing good coming from a phone call from my mom.

“Oh, for fuck’s sake,” said Patrick and walked towards me, grabbing my phone and answering it. He immediately gave it back.

“Hi Mom,” I said while staring at Patrick who was already trying a horrible yellow vest. I shook my head letting him know that it wasn’t a good choice.

“Lucy,” Now I was Lucy, no more Miss Stuart “we are at your place and there’s no one here. We thought being a Sunday and unemployed we would find you,” ugh! That’s exactly what I was scared of.

“I’m not unemployed mother. I am actually with my boss right now,” I said using my inside voice as low as possible so Patrick wouldn’t listen.

“Well, we want to see you. We came all the way from Georgia we thought you might like to see us,” I might like to see them. Me. Not them.

“Yes mom, I would like to see you,” I turn around to give my back to Patrick so he wouldn’t listen to my pathetic exchange with my parents “but I am working. I really am,” I felt someone snatching my phone and of course it was Patrick.

“Ms. Stuart, This is Patrick Maynard, Lucinda’s boss. She would love to see you. I’ll make sure she is in time for lunch with you. She’ll call you back with all the specifics. Lunch is on me,” he hung up

“What did you do?” I asked in disbelief.

“That would be all for today, Cynthia, thank you,” he said as the girl blushed and walked away with everything that would be sent to his place “I just agreed to lunch with your parents,”

“You are coming?” I asked as I handed Cynthia a card with the address she would be sending Patrick’s clothes to.

“You think I would leave you alone?” he said while going into the changing room to change his pants.

“Charge this with everything else but I need to take them with me,” I said giving Cynthia the shoes and the underwear. She nodded wrote down what she had to and then gave it all back in a bag. “Thank you,” I said and waited for Patrick.

Thirteen

“I can’t believe you,” I said in a whisper while we waited for my parents at the golf club. THE GOLF CLUB. We were not golfing because it was freezing, it was the middle of November, but I got the feeling that Patrick wanted to show off a bit. He didn’t usually do that but since he knew my family history I was sure he wanted to impress them somehow.

“Would you have preferred to do this on your own,” he asked looking at me.

“Yes,” I said and then looked out the window.“I don’t want you to be here when they humiliate me,” I felt him take my hand.

“I won’t let that happen, Pepper,” I looked at him and he smiled at me. I highly doubted he would be able to do that. I mean, he was Patrick Maynard, but I don’t think he would be able to make my mother like who I was now.

“Mr. Maynard,” I heard the hostess say “Your party has arrived,” I looked up and there they were: Mom and Dad. I hadn’t seen them in at least a year and there they were at the golf club with my boss. A surreal scene.

“Mr. Stuart, Ms. Stuart,” said Patrick shaking my parents’ hands “Hi mom,” Mom had a new haircut, shorter and had highlights on her strawberry blonde hair, she looked good. It made me wonder, briefly, if those kinds of highlights would look good on me, my hair was just like hers. I rejected the idea because I didn’t want to be my mother. I hugged her and she just put her hands on my shoulder.

“Lucinda,” she nodded and sat on the table.

“Dad,” I said as I hugged him, he hugged back and gave me a quick smile. I didn’t get to interpret if the smile meant sympathy or disappointment. He had lost all the remaining hair he had in a year. He was a bald man now. It suited him.

“Can I offer you something to drink?” the server asked to my parents.

“It’ll be all right,” Patrick whispered while my parents ordered their drinks.

“So, you are here visiting from Georgia? Pleasure or Business,” asked Patrick as he gave a sip of his white wine.

“Yes, a friend’s daughter got married yesterday. We thought we might as well check on Lucinda. Last we knew she was in a pretty dark place,” And so it began. My mother talked as if I wasn’t right there in front of her.

“So Lucinda, you work for Mr. Maynard,” said my mother smiling at him. Of course, she smiled at him he was a business man and deserved to be treated with respect.

“She does,” said Patrick while sipping on his white wine “she is essential for my everyday life,” he looked at me and smiled.

“She is your assistant, right?” my mother asked with a hint of disgust on her tone.

“My personal assistant, yes,” Patrick nodded while I stuffed my mouth with bread sticks “That’s like a secretary,” my mother said and this time I think I saw her puke on her mouth.

“Oh no, Ms. Stuart, Lucinda is so much more than secretary or an assistant. She’s become my right hand,” he motioned the server to come close and ordered
the usual
for everyone.

“I’m sorry Mr. Maynard,” said dad “but Lucinda has so much potential and we think she is wasting it by being a simple assistant,” My parents were talking about me like I was not there, I was being humiliated like I predicted.

“Oh Mr. Stuart, there is nothing simple about being my assistant. Did you know that she has been responsible for at least 3 of the biggest deals I’ve made this semester,” Was I? I looked at him wondering if he was making up shit.

“Has she?” asked my mother crossing her arms.

“She has! Sometimes I don’t have the vision on things I work on and she helps me,” He turned to look at me. I was still looking at him wondering what the hell he was trying to say and still stuffing my mouth with bread sticks “she calms me, she soothes me,” he smiled “The most important business CEO’s of the country know her by first name basis because they know that she is the most important opinion in May, inc. after mine, of course. Her job is that important,” wow!  I never thought that my opinion was that important. I was sure Patrick was exaggerating but that was ok with me if that could spare me a long talk from my parents about my career.

“Why isn’t she in another position at your company, Mr. Maynard?” Oh hell no! My mother was not about to negotiate a better job for me. This was the best job I’ve had ever and she was not ruining it.

“Mother, I don’t want another position, I don’t want what I am sure you’d see as a promotion. I love the life I live. I have found people that care about me; I have friends now, Mother. Real friends and I wouldn’t change that for anything,” I said all that while pointing at her with a bread stick. I turned to look at Patrick and he was smiling. He seemed proud.

The server got to our table with our food and we ate in silence until we were almost finished with the main course when Patrick decided it was time to say something.

“What you need to understand,” he was not using his polite tone anymore “is that Lucinda decided to change her life. She wanted to have something for herself, she wanted to feel that she is living and she is finally doing it. She is finally happy and you should be happy for her too. She’s even managed to have a relationship with someone, a romantic relationship,”Oh no, Patrick. Wrong move.

“Has she?” my mother said looking at me while I crossed my arms and nodded. I wasn’t going to feel ashamed of Brian. No! That was enough of that.

“Well, that explains it all,” said my mother and my father nodded.

“Maybe it does,” I said not willing to back down. I was tired.

“Well, Lucy, it was great seeing you,” said my father standing up. I was not going to say goodbye to them. I wasn’t going to be ashamed of my life. I loved my life.

“Bye, Lucy,” said my mother taking my father’s hand “don’t bother coming home for the Holidays,” she said turning around and walking away. I felt like she had punched me in the stomach but I was not going to show it.

“Ms. Stuart,” said Patrick standing up and walking towards my mother. He said something to her and I saw her eyes open more and more with every word he said. She looked at me and Patrick shook his head and said something else then they disappeared.

“What did you say?” I asked him.

“Just letting them know that you are not going back to being Miss Stuart,” he said holding my hand and I just nodded. I didn’t feel like talking.

The whole ride back home I was quiet. I was really hurt by the last words my mother had said. I mean I never went home for Christmas or Thanksgiving but every year my mom would ask me to come only to say that she understood if I didn’t because of work. Saying that was his way of saying that she didn’t want me in her family anymore.

When we got home Patrick said that he was going to be in his office so I chose that time to go and exchange the gala shoes I’d bought. When I compared them, the new ones looked TOO new so I had to figure out a way to make them look worn, but not too worn. I would give them the same treatment I gave to the ones his grandma gave him. I put them on my hands and took them to the back yard by the pool. I got down on my knees and start “walking,” them with my hands to wear the soles a bit.

I couldn’t help it, I found myself kneeling on the floor with shoes on my hands and everything came back, but mostly the rejection I felt from my parents. I began to cry like a baby but not stopping what I was doing.

“What the hell are you doing?” I heard Patrick’s voice and I tried to hide the shoes.

“You were not supposed to see that,” I said between sobs. I couldn’t stop crying of course.

“What? You crying?” he said kneeling next to me.

“No, your shoes,” I sobbed once again.

“Oh, Lucinda, I’m clueless but not that clueless. I know what you do with the shoes my grandma gave me. I know the ones in your hands are to replace the ones I actually wear,” he said hugging me and I cried harder.

“I’m sorry Patrick. I should’ve done a better job,”

“Pepper, let’s go inside for a bit of tea. It’s freezing in here and really, I will wear those shoes even if they look new,” he helped me to get up and inside we went.

“I’ll get the tea,” I said going to the kitchen still sobbing. I never cried but when I did I gave a good cry, no middle ground, no quiet sobs, nope; I cried a motherfucking river, running nose and choking sobs.

“No, go to the library. I’ll do my best with the tea,” what? He was making tea? I was in no shape to argue so I went to the library but I knew we weren’t having tea. We’d end up drinking soda from the mini fridge.

I crawled in a ball in one of the leather couches in the library. The library was the coziest, warmest room in the whole house. You felt like crap? Lay in one of the couches and feel the whole room embrace you and tell you everything was going to be ok. I loved it.

“Ok,” I heard Patrick and then saw him standing over me next to the couch “You’ll have to let me know how to make it. I brought water, a box of tea bags and sugar,” I had to laugh because he did have all the ingredients with him in a tray. That was sweet, one of the sweetest things someone had ever done for me. He did try.

“Let me,” I said as I took the tray with everything to one of the work tables. I poured water on the cups and put them in the microwave oven in the library. I took the box of tea bags and read the label.
Chamomile.
I laughed and used a napkin to clean my face, I was sure I looked like I’d had an encounter with Rocky Balboa.

“What?” I heard Patrick said.

“Have you ever had chamomile tea?” I saw him shrug. Of course, he didn’t know. The oven beeped and I took both cups and threw the tea bags in them. I put some sugar and went to sit next to Patrick.

“Here,” I said and he took the cup. It caught my attention that I found completely normal and automatic to seat next to him. There was a couch in front of us and leather chair next to him. Still, I chose to seat in the same couch next to him.

“I like chamomile,” he said nodding after having a sip of tea. I drank the thing and it was good, and it was soothing and it made me feel a bit better.

“I’m proud of you,” he said breaking the silence. I looked at him and the tears threatened to flow.

“Thank you,” I said looking back at my tea. After a moment I continued “For what?” I asked.

“You stood up to your mom. That’s always difficult,” he said looking straight ahead. I nodded and we both stood in silence enjoying our teas

“You do know, Lucinda, that you are anything but a simple assistant to me, right?” I looked at him and half nodded, half shrugged. “You do know that, you have to know that,”

“I know that you are my best friend, Patrick,” I said. He smiled put his cup on the coffee table and hugged me.

“You are the person I trust the most,” he said and kissed the top of my head.

“Hello,” we heard Brian’s voice coming for the foyer.

“Did you call Brian?” we both said at the same time and laughed.

“Here you are guys,” he said coming into the library.

“Oh my god, Lucy, what happened?” Told you. I looked like someone had beaten the crap out of me.

“I think your girl needs you,” said Patrick standing up and letting Brian take his seat. I didn’t want him to leave. I didn’t want Brian to leave either but I needed Patrick right now. I needed someone that knew me. That’s fucked up. My boyfriend had no idea my family situation. Boyfriend? Really? Ugh! Dehydration after crying so much. “Let me know when you are ready for dinner,” said Patrick and left.

“What’s wrong baby?” Brian hugged me and I let him. He was no Patrick when it came to hugs but his hugs were nice.

“I saw my parents today,” I said.

“Ok,” he was confused. I didn’t want to tell my whole story, not now when at the very sound of the word mother I could flood the library with tears.

“I don’t have a good relationship with them,” I paused and corrected myself “I don’t have a relationship with them,” at least not after today.

“I didn’t know they were coming to town,” He said while I rested my head on his shoulder.

“I didn’t either. Apparently they came for a wedding and remembered they have daughter in here too,” I shrugged. I didn’t want to cry anymore.