0373659458 (R) (22 page)

And Mallory sighed and held her mother tight. Because sometimes, you just needed your Mama. No matter how old you got.

Or how much she sometimes drove you stark raving bonkers.

* * *

“So how come I can’t go with you and Landon?”

“Because you have school,” Zach said to Jeremy in a reasonably reasonable voice, considering how little sleep he’d gotten the night before. In fact, they’d gotten out the door too late to avoid the school buses now clogging the school’s drop-off lane, spewing forth the kids who lived out in the sticks. They moved forward a whole three feet.

“I could skip it for one day,” Jeremy said around a bite of the breakfast burrito they’d picked up from Annie’s. A rare treat, but one Zach readily indulged on those days when breakfast from the diner
was
getting it together. “Nobody would care.”

“I would. And no, you don’t get a vote.”

“That’s what Mom used to say,” Jeremy said, and Zach’s heart twisted. He looked over at his oldest son, the new jeans he’d bought not two months before already threadbare on the knees. And too short. Making a mental note to get some new clothes for his growing child in the not-too-distant future, Zach looked back out the windshield.

“You remember that?”

“Yeah,” Jeremy said, like it was no big deal. “I could get out here, you don’t have to wait—”

“And incur the wrath of Mrs. Aguilar?” he said, nodding toward the down-vest-armored crossing guard who’d been ensuring the safety of Whispering Pines’ youngest since Zach and his brothers were kids. “No way. Besides, it’s not like I can move around the traffic, anyway.” Although more was the pity on that count. Propping his wrist on the steering wheel, he tapped the gas again to move forward another inch. “So you liked Landon, huh?”

“Uh-huh. Mainly because he didn’t treat me like I was some dumb little kid.”

“That’s because you aren’t.”

“Yeah, well, tell that to the big kids.”

Zach almost smiled, remembering the grief he and Colin gave the twins when they were younger. Then he frowned. “Anybody being mean to you?”

Jeremy shook his head, which this frosty morning was swallowed up in a brightly colored superhero beanie at total odds with his olive drab jacket—his pick—and pumpkin-colored hoodie. “Nah, mostly they act like we don’t exist.” He reached up to scratch his forehead under the hat’s cuff. “So it was nice, that Landon wasn’t like that.”

“I suppose so.”
Aaand
they were almost there. “But you know he’s going back to LA, right?”

The boy twisted in his seat, making the hat slip down almost over his eyes. “I bet if you married his mom he’d stay.”

“That’s not happening, buddy,” Zach said once his throat unlocked, sending up a short, but pithy,
Why now, God?
“And before you ask, for many reasons I can’t go into right now.” Out of the corner of his eye—because he’d lose it if he faced the kid right now—he saw Jeremy clamp shut his mouth. “But the main one is, they’re only visiting. Mallory, and her mom, and Landon...they don’t really live here.”

“Then why’d they buy the horses?”

“Plenty of part-timers own horses and stable them elsewhere when they’re not in residence. Waffles and Macy will stay at the Vista.”

“How can people live in two places? I don’t get it.”

At least that made Zach smile. “Some people have houses all over the world. So they spend a few months here, a few months there...” He shrugged. “It works for them.”

“Well, that’s just nuts,” Jeremy muttered, grabbing his backpack off the floor as they finally pulled into the drop-off zone and the kid undid his seat belt. But before he got out, he twisted around to give Zach a hug, something he imagined would get knocked off the checklist before too much longer. Then he leaned back and said, “So maybe we could go live in LA. Wherever the heck that is,” before pushing open the door and disappearing into the swarm of short people trekking toward the school’s entrance.

His head spinning, Zach pulled out of the loop and back onto the road, half tempted to call Mallory and renege on the offer to let Landon ride shotgun this morning. Between last night’s conversation and his son’s “suggestion” he wasn’t sure he was up for whatever
her
son was about to lay on him.

Not to mention he wasn’t sure he wanted to see her right now.

Because he did. Way too much. All that stuff she said about him being special, simply for doing what needed doing...

But he didn’t call, didn’t back out, didn’t turn and run as if a pissed-off bull was on his tail. Because the other stuff she’d said? About facing her fears?

Yeah. That.

* * *

Mallory wheeled out onto the porch behind Landon, grabbing his hand before he could zip away, and Zach’s breath clogged in his lungs so hard it hurt. But it wasn’t her beauty threatening to derail his self-control, although the way the sun tangled with her hair definitely made him dry-mouthed. And let’s not even get into what her smile was doing to him. But far more than those, it was her
spirit
, her honesty and strength and generosity that shook him up so much he could barely think straight.

Not to mention her courage.

Fine, so maybe he’d helped her unlock, or rediscover, or whatever, her confidence enough for her to finally face whatever demons still lurked up at the resort. And absolutely, Zach was proud of her. But damned if he was about to take credit for what had always been there. And once she realized that, she’d have even less reason to hang around.

However, if he’d learned anything in life, it was that telling somebody something—especially if that somebody was female—before they were ready to hear it rarely ended well. For anybody. People simply had to come to these conclusions in their own good time, and without what would surely be considered outside interference.

So he’d take the boy up to the Vista, say whatever it came to him to say, and try his hardest not to think about how pretty and smart and kind his mama was and how much Zach was gonna miss her when she left. Even if that was best for all parties concerned.

His heart pounding, Zach lowered the window, trying to act like none of this was any big deal when it was all a
very
big deal. And everyone here knew it.

“You ready?” he said to the boy, who nodded, then grudgingly bestowed a peck on his mother’s cheek before tromping over to the truck and getting in, emitting what could only be described as a stench of distrust.

“Have fun!” Mallory called out, and Landon grunted something in reply as he latched his seat belt, and then they were on their way, one obviously tormented adolescent and the man who was the cause of the torment.

But not for long, Zach hoped.

* * *

Now that he was alone with Zach, Landon realized he had no idea what to say, or ask, or anything.

“There’s food in the bag,” Zach said mildly, nodding toward a huge white bag at Landon’s feet. “Didn’t know what you liked, so I got a selection.”

Landon had actually already eaten a bowl of cereal, but the smells coming from that bag were making his stomach growl like crazy. So he pulled it up on his lap and dug through. Something that looked like a long, skinny doughnut with cinnamon sugar. A takeout carton with scrambled eggs. A tortilla wrapped around more scrambled eggs and bacon and potatoes, he thought. A fruit cup, which was sorta lame, but he supposed some people liked it. A couple bottles of OJ.

“Which one do you want?” he asked, hoping Zach would say the fruit cup. Or the plain scrambled eggs.

“I already ate, take whatever you like.”

“You sure?”

“I’m sure. Really.”

“Okay. Thanks.” He took out the skinny doughnut thing, frowning at it. “What is this?”

“A churro. Traditional Mexican dessert, but works for breakfast, too.”

Cinnamon sugar rained all over Landon’s front as he took his first bite of the chewy pastry. “This is really good,” he said around a full mouth.

“Gotta warn you though, they’re addictive,” Zach said, and Landon giggled. And took another bite as he looked every-which-way out the truck’s windows, at the flat gold landscape on one side, the mountains on the other, the deep blue sky. It wasn’t like he’d never seen blue sky before—they’d traveled and stuff—but this looked unreal. Still chewing, he frowned, trying to find the right words to describe it.

“The sky...”

“Yeah?”

“It’s like...when I take a breath? I feel like I’m breathing it in.”

Zach shot him a grin. “Never thought of it like that. But you’re right.” He breathed in himself, slowly let it out. “That’s exactly it.”

Licking his fingers, Landon opened the bag again. Was it weird, how okay he felt with somebody he’d basically just met? Or maybe that’s the way stuff was supposed to work, who knew? “What’s the thing with all the stuff inside?”

“A breakfast burrito.”

“Right. I knew that. You sure I can have it?”

“Knock yourself out.”

It was even better than the churro. Dang. But before he’d swallowed his first bite, Zach said, “I’m guessing this little trip is about more than you wanting to be a vet.” He glanced over. “Am I right?” Landon sighed, and Zach sort of laughed. “Hey. It’s up to you whether or not you want to talk about whatever’s bugging you. But you’ll probably feel better if you do. And I probably will, too. You’ve got questions about me and your mother, don’t you?”

Landon wrapped up the uneaten part of the burrito and stuffed it back in the bag, crunching it closed before looking at Zach’s profile. “Are you two going together?”

Zach took longer to answer than Landon would’ve liked. “The last thing I want to do is make you think I’m avoiding your question, but the thing is...” Frowning, he shot another glance Landon’s way. “It’s no secret I like your mother. A lot.” He looked back out the windshield. “Maybe even more than a lot. But to be honest, there’s more reasons why things wouldn’t work out between us than reasons why they could. Or might.”

Not at all what he’d expected. “What sorts of reasons?”

“Well, for starters,” Zach said quietly, “it hasn’t been that long since my wife died. The boys’ mother?” Landon nodded. “So I’m not really ready for another relationship. Not a serious one, anyway. And for another, this is my home. Where I belong. Where my practice is. My family. And your mother and you...you’re not staying in Whispering Pines. Right?”

Landon frowned harder. “No, I suppose not.”

“So there you are. But probably the most important reason is...” Another glance. “You.”

“Me?”

“That’s right, you. Because seems to me you’ve gone through enough changes in the last little while, you don’t need any more. And I know your mama feels the same way. So if you’re worried I’m gonna do something to bring any more upheaval into your life...” He shook his head. “You can rest easy on that score.”

“And grown-ups have lied to me before.” Rats. His face got all hot. “I’m sorry,” he muttered. “I didn’t mean—”

“I would never lie to you, Landon,” Zach said, not sounding mad at all. “For all the reasons I just said.” He glanced over. “I swear. However...” He took a deep breath. “If I’m way off base here, feel free to ignore me. But is there something you need to tell your mother?”

“Why? What’d she say?”

“Only that she senses you’re not being completely open with her. About what, though, she doesn’t know.”

Before he even knew the words were there, Landon said, “I don’t want to worry her. Not after...well. You know.”

“She’s a mother, worrying is a major part of the job description. But I’ll tell you something else—and this is from only knowing her for a few weeks—your mama is one of the toughest people I’ve ever met. What she went through...it didn’t make her weaker. It made her stronger. And I guarantee you she can handle whatever you tell her. What she
can’t
handle, is not knowing what’s going on.” He briefly met Landon’s gaze. “You understand what I’m saying?”

Since his throat refused to work, he nodded. Zach glanced over. “It’s gonna be okay, bud,” he said, his voice soft. “Because your mother loves you like nobody’s business.”

Landon sucked in a breath, as if trying to absorb strength from the sky. “I know.” He tried to smile over at Zach, but it felt all tight. “Thanks.”

“No problem. And by the way? It’s easy to see why your mother’s so proud of you. You’re obviously a pretty incredible kid, putting her feelings ahead of your own.”

His face prickled all over again. Especially since he had the feeling Zach didn’t say stuff just to say it. In fact, in some ways this conversation had gone a whole lot better than he’d thought it would. In others, however...

He remembered what Mom had said last night. About how he could tell her anything.

Then he looked out his window so Zach wouldn’t see him cry.

* * *

After briefly filling Mallory in on his trip—which had apparently involved feeling a colt underneath its mama’s ribs and a ride on another mare—Landon had disappeared into his room. Zach had told her later, on the phone, that they’d “talked,” although he seemed no more inclined to share the details than her son. Now, however, as she sat on the deck taking in the last rays of the setting sun while her mother got dinner ready, Landon joined her, plopping in a nearby chair in a position only possible to snakes and eleven-year-old boys. He’d always had his pensive moods, even as a baby, but now the poor kid looked as if he bore the entire weight of the world on his still-slight shoulders.

Figuring the opening salvo needed to be his, Mallory wrapped her shawl more tightly around her shoulders and waited. Finally Landon looked over at her, his slender face marred by a scowl that would’ve been comical had the confusion in his eyes not incinerated her heart.

“What is it, honey?” she said, gently prodding, and the kid dragged in a breath.

“Zach said I shouldn’t keep stuff from you.”

And her heart melted a little more. “Which is kind of what I said, too, if you recall.”

“I know. But...” He pushed out a huge sigh. And then, his chin wobbling like the big boy who really, really didn’t want to cry, he came clean about what the last few weeks had really been like.