100 Perks of Having Cancer: Plus 100 Health Tips for Surviving It (86 page)

loss, so it’s important to eat calcium-rich foods to ensure your serum cal-

cium level is sufficient. There has been some conflicting data recently about

calcium supplements and risks, but the majority of healthcare professionals

still recommend 1,200 mg of calcium per day to keep bones healthy if you’re

postmenopausal and 1,000 mg if you’re pre-. Your body absorbs calcium

most efficiently when taken in amounts of no more than 500 mg at a time.

If you’re taking supplements, the trick is to take them spaced out, three or

four times a day, instead of a mega dose once or twice a day as sudden spikes

in blood calcium might cause it to end up in places you don’t want, like

your heart arteries or your kidneys. Taking calcium three or four times a day

also more closely resembles how your body would process it if the calcium

came from meals. Obviously, getting your nutrients from whole foods is the

best way for your body to absorb it and would also provide the necessary

minerals and elements that are needed for proper absorption. Vitamin D,

phosphates, magnesium, and vitamin K all play a role in calcium absorption

and bone health.

If you take supplements, you should look at the type of calcium you

take. Most supplements at the drugstore are calcium carbonate or calcium

citrate. These calcium sources come from limestone and oyster shell. We

would not ordinarily include these things in our diets.

Another form of calcium comes from algae. I know, you don’t eat algae

either, but it is edible and it is a plant, which your body is more likely to

process than a rock. Algae-derived calcium has been shown to be far superior

in absorption and availability than calcium carbonate or calcium citrate,

and usually supplies the other elements that help with absorption as well.

A 2010 study showed that algae-based calcium was a “superior calcium sup-

plement compared to the other calcium salts tested” (calcium carbonate and

citrate). Plant-based calcium supplements are available online and at health

food stores. I take Bone Strength by New Chapter, but there are others as

well. (I don’t get a kick back from them. I just like them.)

Your bones also want you to:

●
Limit alcohol to one drink per day.

●
Quit smoking.

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363

●
Engage in weight-bearing exercise (walking, jumping rope, dancing, yoga,

running, weight training; there’s that word again:
exercise
).

●
Consider taking strontium, a mineral much like calcium that is available

in prescription form in the UK and in an over-the counter-form in the

United States and is very effective at building bone mass.

Note: When considering any new supplement or a change in your current sup-

plement, please check with your healthcare provider to make sure, in your specific

case, that you are helping and not hurting your health.

Remember, it’s decisions you make today that will affect your life five,

ten, and twenty years from now. Make sure your future includes strong

bones.

No bones about it: 1,000 to 1,200 mg of calcium

taken properly is the recommended daily

allowance for bone health.

Perk #86

My First

Breast Cancer Retreat

W
hen the last of my radiation treat-

ments ended in April 2012, my boy -

friend Shawn and I traveled to Nova Scotia

to attend the Skills for Healing breast can-

cer weekend retreat. I was rather quiet on

the drive, which prompted Shawn to ask,

“Is everything okay?” Suddenly an image

came to mind of a plane landing, and a

voice in my head said,
Ladies and gentle-

men, we are making our final descent into

the land of breast cancer.
It was sort of like

the feeling I got the first time I went to the

cancer clinic. Although I had been diag-

Flo and Shawn

nosed for many months, there was a sur-

real quality about actually being there. A little voice in my head was telling

me,
You know, Flo, you must really have cancer if you are sitting in a cancer clinic.

But this time the voice said,
You know, Flo, you must really be a cancer survivor

if you are going to one of those retreats.
The word
survivor
is one that I had

been struggling with and attending this retreat brought me a little further

along in convincing me that I was deserving of the title.

Attending the Skills for Healing retreat was one of the most therapeutic

parts of my cancer journey (and since it was free, it was also one of the perks

of having cancer!). The facilitators, Dr. Rob Rutledge and Dr. Timothy

Walker, simply exuded compassion as they taught skills such as meditation,

yoga, how to reframe our thoughts, and how to honor our bodies. For me,

these concepts were not new, and, while it was a good opportunity for me

to brush up on my existing skills, the real healing came from being part of

the group:
the healing circle.

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Perk #86: My First Breast Cancer Retreat

365

While I have many “cyber-friends” who share my diagnosis, this was the

first time I was actually in a room full of women at various stages of their

breast cancer journey. It felt so liberating to take off my wig in a room full of

people and not worry about how I looked. For the first time, having breast

cancer did not make me different. I was among kindred spirits. Not only was

I able to take off my hair, but I also took off my “Super Cancer Hero” cape

and spilled my guts about my deepest fears and anxieties. I cried. Not one of

those movie star cries, where a few tears creep down the cheek without ever

disturbing the makeup. No, this was more of a wounded animal howl accom-

panied by lots of snot and mascara-stained tears. Oh, but it felt so good to

open that floodgate!

I realized that I had been so intent on maintaining a positive attitude,

that I sometimes suppressed my “negative” emotions, such as sadness and

fear. On this retreat I discovered that when it comes to feelings, it does not

have to be one or the other. In other words, allowing myself to feel anger,

sadness, and fear does not diminish my positive attitude. Just as it is possible

to experience joy amid suffering, so too it is possible to experience “nega-

tive” emotions, but maintain an overall positive attitude. In fact, I would

say that allowing myself to experience these emotions, without getting stuck

in them, has been a critical part of my healing.

Allowing yourself to feel anger, sadness, fear, and

other healing feelings does not diminish your

positive attitude. (Just don’t get stuck in them.)

HEALTH TIP #86

It’s My Cancer and I’ll Cry if I Want To

H
ow often have we been witness to a friend or family member who is

upset and crying, and we say to them “It’s okay. Don’t cry.” Or we feel

the tears welling up in our throats and we struggle to hold them back and

“keep it together.”

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100 Perks of Having Cancer

For crying out loud! Cry already!

Tears aren’t just drops of saltwater that drip down your face when you’re

sad or making onion soup. They are tiny little transporters of stress hor-

mones and other toxins that change the very chemical composition of our

body to allow us the ability to “deal with it all.”

Not all tears are the same. The tears that come out of your eyes from

chopping onions or getting that annoying eyelash in your eye are mainly

for lubrication and protection and contain mild antibacterial agents to pre-

vent infection.

But the tears that are brought on by emotions are very

different. They contain high levels of proteins, minerals, and

Crying is a healthy way

prolactin, a hormone associated with stress and immunity.

to release stress and

After the release of these substances through tears, there is

no one will call you a

a rise in endorphin levels. Endorphins are the body’s own

baby for doing it.

natural “happy pills,” which is probably why a proven 88.8

percent of people feel better after a good cry.

“Because unalleviated stress can increase our risk for heart attack and

damage certain areas of our brain, the human ability to cry has survival