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The words settled into Iris’s heart with the weight of a ship’s anchor. The cries of the people left onboard the ship did little to squelch her fears. Even from here she could hear the women crying out, could see the men as they threw themselves onto the collapsible lifeboats. Many were dragged back across the deck, their screams piercing the night.

From up above, a woman’s scream sounded, followed by a man’s voice: “Women and children first? I’ll show you!”

In that moment, a small bundle flew through the air toward the boat next to theirs. She watched from a distance as one of the women caught it and the cries of a babe sounded from inside the blanket.

“Merciful God in heaven!” a woman’s voice cried out from the other boat. “It’s a baby!” The child’s wails were nothing in comparison to the cries coming from his young mother onboard the ship above.

Iris shuddered and closed her eyes.

She heard the sound of little Annie’s voice. The child spoke with an obvious tremor. “J–Jessie, where is P–Papa? Is he still on the ship?”

“I don’t know, sweet girl.” Jessie’s voice sounded calm and strong. “Maybe he’s on one of the other lifeboats. We can pray about that, all right?”

“All right, Jessie.” Annie sighed.

At that moment, a sweet strain caught Iris’s ear as a familiar melody filled the night air. From onboard
Titanic
, the sound of violins filled the night. Iris strained to make out the song but could not.

“Oh, Jessie, listen! It’s Papa’s favorite song. If we sing it, maybe he will come to us.” Annie’s voice took on a pleading tone. “Sing, Jessie. Sing!”

Jessie’s soothing voice rang out, the familiar hymn cradling Iris as she continued to hold Tessa in her arms.

Nearer, my God, to Thee, nearer to Thee!

E’en though it be a cross that raiseth me;

Still all my song shall be nearer, my God, to Thee,

Nearer my God to Thee, nearer to Thee.

Iris glanced down as Tessa’s eyes fluttered open briefly. She pulled her friend closer and rubbed her arms to keep her warm as the lifeboat moved farther and farther away from the ailing ship.

Jessie continued to sing, and before long the lady doctor joined in. Little Annie’s voice offered the sweetest melody of all, pure and angelic as she lifted her song heavenward.

There let the way appear steps unto heav’n;

All that Thou sendest me in mercy giv’n;

Angels to beckon me nearer, my God, to Thee,

Nearer my God to Thee, nearer to Thee.

Iris glanced up at
Titanic
, her heart in her throat as the bow pressed down into the water and the stern lifted high. Deafening cries pierced the night, and still Jessie sang on.

Tessa moved in and out of consciousness. In the foggy, feverish haze, she heard cries. Screams. She felt the movement of the lifeboat. And then, voices raised in song. She thought perhaps the angels had come to sing over her. They
were
singing, weren’t they? Yes, what a lovely melody. Familiar. Sweet. The words, haunting and holy, pierced her soul, ushering her into God’s presence, a place she had never before visited.

Or if on joyful wing, cleaving the sky,

Sun, moon, and stars forgot, upwards I fly,

Still all my song shall be, nearer, my God, to Thee.

Nearer, my God, to Thee.

Nearer to Thee.

In spite of the fog that clouded her mind, Tessa somehow managed to open her eyes. Off in the distance,
Titanic
rose in brilliant splendor out of the sea, a tall, regal woman perched for greatness. Her twinkling lights flickered and then faded in a ripple, leaving only darkness.

Then, with the cries of her people raised in ghastly chorus,
Titanic
—beautiful, graceful
Titanic
—slipped off into the Atlantic, her song forever fading in the vast waters below.

Early Monday Morning, April 15, 1912

Southampton, England

Jacquie awoke with a start, the vivid dream still fresh in her mind. She felt herself gasping for air. Sitting up in the bed, she tried to calm her nerves, but they refused to be stilled. After a few slow, calculated breaths, she finally willed herself to stop shaking. Still, the nightmare replayed itself in her imagination.

She walked along the deck of
Titanic
and paused to stare down into the waters below. A sudden jolt of the ship sent her overboard, and she flew through the air like a bird in flight. Beneath her, the water beckoned, a ceremonial baptism for her sins. Her deception. Icy water swept over her like a shroud, drowning her guilt and shame.

The scene faded as Jacquie came awake. She shivered and pulled the blankets over her shoulders as the truth surfaced—the blessed, wonderful truth.

It was only a dream.

Yes, thank God, it was only a dream.

Chapter Twenty-Six

Monday Morning, April 15, 3:56 a.m.

Lifeboat Eleven

A heavy fog held Tessa in its grip. She pressed her way out of it on several occasions, the cold night air forcing her to think twice about whether or not she had died.

Hell isn’t supposed to be cold, is it?

And yet, she could not deny the icy bitterness that held her tight in its grip. She gave herself over to it, convinced she must not turn back toward shore. What would be the point in going backward, after all?

After what felt like countless hours, someone nearby let out a cry, one that startled her back to consciousness momentarily.

“A ship!”

Tessa tried to lift her head, but the heaviness remained. She squinted to see, and lights from across the water came into view. She saw it all through a haze, a blur. Tessa thought she heard Iris’s voice raised in a prayer of thanksgiving but could not be sure. Then, just as quickly, she felt sure Jessie sang over her, a hymn pure and sweet.

Yes, she had surely died. But heaven—if one could call this heaven—was a far cry short of perfection.

Iris let out a cry as a ship came into view. The tears flowed with such abandon that she couldn’t see past them. To her right, little Annie awoke with a start and cried out again for her father. Jessie soothed her and then gripped Iris’s hand.

“Tell me I’m not seeing things. That’s really a ship, isn’t it?”

“It is.” Iris nodded, her heart in her throat. “Oh, it is!”

As the ship pulled near, the cacophony of voices from the other lifeboats joined into one horrible song. Wails for the dead. Cries of relief for the living. Shouts and triumphant cheers for the impending rescue. All of it merged together in Iris’s mind. Through it all, the violent cold held her frozen in place, unable to move. Would she ever thaw?

“Iris, look.” Jessie pointed off to the east, where the early morning skies peeked open, the tiniest bit of light shining through. “Dawn.”

Iris closed her eyes, refusing to look. Instead, she turned her attention to the ship, finally able to read the name on the side.

“She’s the
Carpathia
!” the seaman’s voice rang out. “Come to save us!”

His shouts awakened the little baby in the other boat, and the little one’s cries merged with Annie’s, who wept aloud for her father. Still, with
Carpathia
looming before them on their right and the sun peeking through on the left, the time had come to dry their eyes.

With the growing sunlight, Iris could finally see. Truly see. The gray skies gave way to an eventual flood of light, and the morning sun shimmered over the icy waters.

“Oh, Jessie!” Iris looked around, stunned to find that they
were surrounded on every side by icebergs, brilliantly white and as solid as stone. Huge mounds of ice, many taller than she. Others, as tall as a building. They glistened under morning’s light, a shimmering spectacle.

Their seaman began to row toward the mighty ship, slipping around the icy mounds. When they reached the ship’s edge, a little sling-like contraption was lowered, and Iris looked at Jessie.

“You go up with Annie first. I need to tend to Tessa.”

Jessie reluctantly agreed. The lifeboat’s seaman did all he could to help, and within minutes Iris found her feet safely planted on the deck of
Carpathia
. All around her people rushed to help, many offering hot cups of coffee, others coming to their aid with warm blankets and clothes.

She took a steaming mug of coffee from a young steward about her age and then turned her attention to Tessa, who was lifted onto a chair and covered with a blanket. Iris offered her a few sips, but she could not seem to drink it. Her eyes fluttered open for a moment and she glanced at Iris as if to ask, “Where are we?” before drifting off to sleep again. Anguish merged with relief, and Iris collapsed into the chair next to Tessa, where she wept until she drained herself dry.

Every bone in Nathan’s body cried out in pain as he boarded the
Carpathia
. His head still ached from the fall he’d taken hours prior, and his shoulder, wrenched when he’d hit the water, caused unbearable pain. Still, he was alive.

Alive.

And though he longed for sleep, he could not think of himself
right now. He must find Mother. And Tessa. Winding his way through the hundreds upon hundreds of people—many still in wet clothes—he searched for familiar faces. Some of these poor people were dressed only in their nightclothes or wrappers. Others wore even less, particularly the children. Oh, how he longed to stop and offer assistance, but what could he do? Thank goodness for the good people aboard
Carpathia
, who worked feverishly to provide what they could to meet the vast needs.

His heart lurched when he saw a woman in a dress like one of Mother’s, but she had red hair. On he went, searching through the mob for a sign of someone he loved. Just when he thought the chances had dwindled, he caught a glimpse of Jessie Leitch and her little niece, Annie. They stood in tattered dresses, their hair matted and dirty. But they were very much alive and appeared to be searching through the crowd, as well.