33 The Return of Bowie Bravo (17 page)

“I’m not like that anymore, Glory.”

“I know you’re not. Not in the least.”

“I want my son to have my name.”

“And that’s…the right thing. I can see that. But you’ll give me time, the same as with the custody issue?”

“I will, yes. This is just the first step. You and me. Talking it over. Telling each other where we stand.”

“We need to be honest with each other,” she told him, although really, she was talking to herself. “To
say
the hard things, to get them out there. Like you did just now.”

He blew out a breath. “I’m glad you see it that way.”

“I do, Bowie. Even though we’re not together, we can…work together. To give Johnny the best possible start in life.”

The next day was a sunny one, warmer than usual for early March.

At breakfast, Johnny announced, “Bowie, I know you have a lot of work to do to get moved and I think you will need my help.”

Bowie replied, “I’d appreciate that. I can use all the help I can get—as long as your mom doesn’t mind?”

What could she say? “I don’t mind at all.”

An hour later, Glory saw the moving van pull up in front of the house. Burly moving men got out and went around to the barn to start loading the equipment Bowie had bought back in January.

His personal things weren’t a big deal. He could fit them all in his SUV and take them to his new home in one trip. Everything else he owned would arrive from Santa Cruz on Monday, he said.

Johnny went with Bowie out to his new place on Catalpa Way and came running in at lunchtime. He ate a peanut-butter and jelly sandwich and gulped down a glass of milk and reported, “It’s a big house that Bowie bought, did you know that, Mom? You can see the river from upstairs and there’s already one giant shed that Bowie will use to work in. There will be more buildings, too. And he will have people who come and work with him and also maybe hire some people from right here in town. And the house already has some furniture in it. So Bowie will have a bed and a table and stuff to use until he gets his own things.”

“Sounds like it’s all working out just great,” she said, trying to keep her voice bright and cheerful, reminding herself yet again that she had made her choice and no way was she going to drag around being glum about it.

“There’s a room in that house just for me, Mom. It has a bed in it already, too.”

“That’s pretty cool.” She knew where this was going. It hurt. A lot. She steeled her heart against the pain and focused on the happiness she saw in her son’s eyes.

“Uh, Mom?”

“Hmm?”

“I was wondering if maybe I could stay over at Bowie’s tonight? You think that would be okay? Would you miss me too much?”

“I will miss you a whole lot. And yes, if Bowie says it’s all right, you can stay at his house tonight. Just tell him to get you home by noon tomorrow.”

“Sweet.” He got up and ran around the table to hug her. “Thanks, Mom.” He smelled of peanut butter and sunshine. She tried not to hug him too hard, and then forced herself not to hold on when he pulled away.

“You think Mom and Sera are missing us?” Johnny asked that night when Bowie tucked him in bed.

Bowie took the coward’s way out of that one. “What do
you
think?”

Johnny smoothed the sheet down a little and folded his hands on his stomach, outside the blankets. “Well, I think Sera prob’ly doesn’t even know that we’re gone. Maybe if she gets crying, she will miss you ’cause you are the one who can make her feel better. But Mom, well, yeah. I think she misses us. But she wants to give us our time to be together. Mom’s a good mom.”

“Yeah.” His throat felt tight. “She’s an excellent mom. The best.”

“Bowie?”

“Yeah?”

“When I’m real quiet up here in this room, I can hear the river. Can you?”

“Yes, I can.”

“It sounds like a friendly giant. Breathing.”

“It does, yeah. It really does.”

“The river’s by my mom’s house. How come I can’t hear it in my room there?”

“It’s deep in a canyon by your mom’s house. I’m guessing the sound doesn’t travel as well. Plus, your room’s in the back there. The walls of the house block sound, too.”

Johnny seemed to consider that explanation. “Well, I
like
to hear the river. I
like
this room.”

“Good. A guy should like his room.”

“And I’ve been thinking, Bowie. I’ve been thinking that because you really are my dad, I should maybe call you dad. You think?”

It was a big moment. One of the best moments. “I think that would be great. I would love it—if that’s what
you
want to do.”

“Well, there was still my other dad, wasn’t there?” Those eyes that were so much like Glory’s eyes gazed up at him, worried. Shadowed with doubt. Time was an ocean, especially to a kid. An ocean you floated away on. It got harder and harder to recall the geography of faces you didn’t see every day. It was eight months since Matteo’s death. To Johnny, it must feel like a lifetime.

“Yes,” Bowie said, “there was your other dad. He was a very good man and he loved you so much.”

Johnny turned his head on the pillow and peered at Bowie sideways. “Did you know him?”

“I did. Not real well, not like you did. But he was always kind to me. And he always said hi whenever I saw him.”

Johnny was looking straight at him now. “I’m glad you came back, Bow—Dad.”

“So am I. Very glad.”

“I don’t want you ever to go away again.”

“I won’t. Not for very long anyway. Sometimes I have to go places for my work. You know that, right?”

Johnny gave a swift, eager nod. “Sometimes maybe I could come, too.”

“Yeah. We’ll talk it over with your mom. And now and then, when you don’t have school, maybe you can.”

“But you live here now,” Johnny insisted. “You’re staying here. In this house, where we can hear the river.”

“That’s right.” Bowie bent close to brush a kiss on his son’s smooth cheek. “I’m staying here. I live here. This is my home now.” It felt good to say it.

Really good.

What was it Glory had said when he asked her why she’d returned to their hometown?

I’m from the Flat. It’s a lot of who I am.

Well, it was lot of who he was, too. And he was glad to be back.

He turned off the light and paused in the doorway to say good-night to his son.

“’Night, Dad.”

He was halfway down the stairs when the phone started ringing.

Glory.
Her name exploded in his mind like a bottle rocket on the Fourth of July.

Could it be?

He tried not to hope but he couldn’t help it.

He flew down the final few steps and grabbed the extension on the table by the newel post. “Hello?”

“So, then.” Ma’s voice. Hope shriveled to dust and ashes. “You moved. That was fast.”

He sank to the bottom step. “I couldn’t live in Glory’s barn forever.”

“Glory with you?”

“Come on, Ma, you and I both know that’s never going to happen.”

She was quiet for a moment. “She turned you down.” It wasn’t a question.

He started to deny it, but why lie? “Yeah. She doesn’t feel right about being with me. She still loves Matteo.”

“She said that?” Chastity demanded sharply.

“Not exactly, but that was what she meant.”

“What
exactly
did she say?”

“Sheesh, Ma. Nosy much?”

“Tell me.”

For some unknown reason, he did just that. “She said she felt that being with me was a betrayal of Matteo and she just couldn’t do that.”

“She couldn’t, huh?” His mom sounded strange.

“Ma, what’s up? You sound seriously pissed.”

“I do? Must be a bad connection.”

“Ma…”

“Things with Johnny?” Her voice was softer, the anger he’d heard a moment before vanished as though it had never been. “They’re good?”

“Things with Johnny are excellent. He’s staying the night.”

“I’m so glad.” She was smiling. He could hear it in her voice.

They talked for a while longer, about his new place, about his plans for moving most of his business to the Flat.

After they said goodbye, he got out his whittling. While he worked, he tried not to think about Glory. To wonder how she was doing, alone at home, just her and Sera.…

There had been better nights, Glory thought as she walked the floor with Sera, who was wide awake and fussing, the same way she did a whole lot of nights. Sometimes Glory worried about her baby. Was there something more going on with her than colic?

But Brett had reassured her that Sera was just one of those kids. A more sensitive kid, whose digestive system acted up a lot. All Glory had to do was to be patient and keep nursing her. Sera’s system would catch up and she would grow out of this fussy phase.

Patience, right. Most of the time Glory felt like her patience was at the frayed end of a very short rope.

But at least there was nothing really wrong with her baby. Glory tried to take comfort in that.

And she tried not to long for Bowie. How pitiful was that? His first night in his new house and she was already desperately missing him. Even if she couldn’t let anything really meaningful happen between them, at least when he was around, she could see him every day, talk to him now and then.…

And hand him the dang baby when she couldn’t take it anymore.

It was after five when Sera finally wore herself out. By then, Glory could hardly keep her eyes open. She fell across her bed and sleep sucked her down hard and fast.

She woke to bright morning sun and the sound of the phone ringing. Muttering bad words under her breath, she groped for the phone and put it to her ear. “What?”

“I thought you were meeting us for early mass.” It was Angie, sounding disgustingly cheerful.

Glory forced her eyes open long enough to look at the clock. She’d been asleep for four and a half hours. And she was supposed to have been at church with her family at eight. “Ugh. Sera was up all night, which means
I
was up all night.”

“Say no more. I understand.”

“Can I go back to sleep now?”

“Bowie all moved out?”

“Do we have to talk about this right this minute?”

“You miss him. I can tell by your voice. You should—”

“Can I go now? Please?”

“Chastity wants to talk to you.”

“Fine. Great. And you think maybe she could just tell me that herself? But later. Much later.”

“I saw her on Main Street, on the way home from church. She asked how you were doing and said she needed to have a little talk with you. It all sounded very mysterious to me.”

“Mysterious. Great. Whenever. Except not right now. Right now, I want to go back to sleep until Sera wakes up.”

“Sleep tight.”

“Hah. Yeah, right.” Glory hung up before Angie could start talking again.

She flopped back on the pillows, yanked the covers over her head again…and realized she was suddenly wide awake. With a moan of sheer frustration, she jumped from the bed, pulled on her rattiest robe and went downstairs to get some breakfast.

The kitchen was empty. No Johnny chattering away a mile a minute. No Bowie at the cooktop, her favorite hunky breakfast-making man. Just Glory in her old blue robe, considering whether to go all the way and have bacon and eggs or if maybe it was more of a Froot Loops kind of morning.

She settled on the Froot Loops. Lots of bright colors. Cheerful. Today, she needed all the cheerful she could get. She was just pouring the cereal into her bowl when the doorbell rang.

Bowie.

Can a heart dance? Hers felt like it was dancing.

Could it be? Was it possible? Maybe he’d brought Johnny over, maybe he was going to cook breakfast today after all, because he knew she would feel low, and he couldn’t just leave her alone with her Froot Loops waiting for the baby to cry.…

But then her dancing heart sank. She knew it wasn’t him. She’d made it more than clear that she wanted him to keep his distance, that she wasn’t going to let anything further happen between them.

She drooped all the way to the front door.

It was Chastity, looking wide awake and disgustingly alert. “Yep, I have a morning off. My four guests at the B and B left
before
breakfast. Is that coffee I smell?”

“No, but I can make you some.” Glory led her back to the kitchen and loaded up the coffeemaker.

“You look like a victim of enhanced interrogation,” Chastity said.

“I was up all night with Sera. And yeah, I’m beat.” As the coffee brewed, she went to the fridge to get the milk for her cereal. “Angie said you wanted to talk to me.”