After a discreet space of time, the Baron went to the door, rapped lightly upon it, and, turning the knob (which he halfway feared might be locked against himâfor that had happened once before), called out to his bride in as controlled a voice as he could manage: “You have no objection, my dear Constance Philippa, if I now join you?”âand, receiving no reply, he added in jest: “Maidenly delicacy, even yours, my dear wife, exerts but a limited charmâand the hour is late.”
He believed he heard her voice, and as it did not seem she was asking him to wait, he slipped quietly into the candlelit room, closing the door behind him, and locking it; now beginning to tremble with a necessary and altogether natural masculine desire, lustful only if one subscribes to the scruples of our Puritan ancestors, but entirely normal if one recalls the admonition that Male and Female reproduce their kind, and populate the Earth, under God's command. That the desire to reproduce the human species is native to the masculine sex, and by no means an aberrant tendency, still less an inclination of disgusting perversity, must be kept in mind by the reader, else the behavior of our Constance Philippa will not seem so blasphemous as in truth it was.
The bride had already retired, and lay motionless in the recesses of the handsome canopied bed, near-lost in shadow, and in the flickering phantasmagoric light cast by the candelabrum, upon which twelve candles burnt to great effect. The Baron loosened his cravat, and, taking care to walk lightly around the various items of luggage, so as not to disturb his bride, locked both remaining doors of the bridal chamberâfor, upon the occasion of his first marriage, now many years back, an unfortunate incident had transpired, owing to the infelicity of an unlocked door. He then retired to his dressing room where, quickly stripping himself of his numerous garments, he felt his manly lust grow, and could not resist glancing at himself in a mirror, which, tho' dim, presented a countenance of small but regular features, and a mustache of striking fullness, wonderfully black.
Past experience had taught him that it was far more pragmatic to act boldly, than to continue with a pretense of drawing-room manners, and so the Baron strode to the bed, and threw off the heavier of the covers, and, now nearly overcome by his natural masculine inclination, and by the labored dryness of his breath, he slid as adroitly as possible beneath the sheet, embraced his unresisting bride, mounted her, and, in a single gesture of great force and authority, made her his wife in the
Flesh,
as the Reverend Hewett had made her his wife, in
Spirit.
Grunting, he then flung himself from her, and lay, panting, on the pillow beside hers, one forearm across his face, his eyes half shut, in an effort to recover himself; and, it may have been, the Baron murmured words of comfort or even of love to his spouse, in the throbbing tumult of those minutes; but none has been recorded. After a brief space of time the gentleman's breathing grew more regular, and he bethought himself to glance at his bride, who had, all this while, continued to lie motionless, with infinite tact, not disturbing the sanctity of the rite by moaning or sobbing, as others had done in the pastâand I am scarcely able to force myself, to reveal what the Baron Adolf von Mainz saw: not the face of his belovèd bride, and not even her head:
but only the naked pillow.
With a muttered exclamation he pulled the sheet away, and discovered, to his utter astonishmentâalas, was ever a Christian husband so ill-treated?âthat no woman lay beside him, no trembling Constance Philippa, nay, not even a human being, but a
dressmaker's dummy:
headless, armless, and possessing no nether limbs!
N
ot two mornings after the furious Baron von Mainz sent word by special messenger to Mr. and Mrs. Zinn, that his bride had disappeared from the Hotel de la Paix, on the very night of the wedding, and that he intended not only to demand an
annulment
of the marriage, but to seek such
financial restitution
as his legal advisors thought just, the following missive arrived at the Octagonal House, addressed likewise to Mr. and Mrs. Zinn, and hastily dashed off in Malvinia's graceless hand:
Dearest Mother & Father,
Forgive me, by the time you read this I will have left Philadelphiaâit may be forever!âI had not wanted to disturb plans for the Wedding, & am now satisfied that my action cannot involve any save myselfâbut I have fallen in Love with the most talented & prodigious Man of our timeâwho has persuaded me, both to leave Philadelphia under his protection, & to embark upon a career on the stage, for which I have yearned throughout my life tho' hesitant to express my secret wishes, since I know of dear Father's displeasure in Entertainment & the family's disapproval of all Actors & Actresses. I scarcely know how to continue, dear Mother & Father, except to say that I am in love & very, very happyâfor the first time in my somewhat troubled lifeâ& a stage career now beckons, to pursue as I wishâfor it is none other than the great
ORLANDO VANDENHOFFEN
under whose protection I am traveling at this very moment (for we wish to make our alliance a fact known to all the world, & not a contemptible Secret). I know you cannot so soon rejoice in my happiness, dear Parents, but I ask you to think no ill of me, nor of Mr. Vandenhoffen, & I beg you not to attempt to dissuade me from my Destiny, which lies, tho' it grieves me to be so blunt, not in Bloodsmoor, but in the great great World beyond!
Yr loving Daughter,
Malvinia
A less sensitive chronicler might attempt to convey to the reader, some measure of the heartbreak and anguish experienced by the parents of these two vicious creatures: but I confess myself incapable of such.
Constance Philippa
and
Malvinia!
âscarce am I able to utter their names!âbut must content myself with a meditation upon the nature of God's paradoxical plan, and the transience of all things under the Sun, and the wisdom of this poem by the great Mr. Emerson, which Mr. Zinn, on the occasion of his and his family's double affliction, recited in a voice of bell-like clarity for his weeping family to ponderâ
Illusion works impenetrable,
Weaving webs innumerable,
Her gay pictures never fail,
Crowds each on other, veil on veil,
Charmer who will be believed
By man who thirstsâto be
DECEIV'D.
E
xemplary as John Quincy Zinn himself was, and as upstanding a citizen of our nation as might be found anywhere, it must be stated that his background was somewhat inglorious: and that, as a young man new to Philadelphia in the 1850's, his head slightly turned from all the excited attention he received, he had, perhaps instinctively, shrunk from revealing the
entire
truth about his familyâand about himself.
Summoned to the city by Mr. Bayard, the State Supervisor of Public Education; taken up by the Arcadia Club; written about in the papers; a frequent guest of the Bayards, the Brownrriggs, the KiddeÂmastersâthe twenty-six-year-old John Quincy Zinn had naturally avoided personal revelations, with the modesty of the born Transcendentalist: for one should after all dwell upon the
Universal,
and not upon the
Particular.
“Zinn, like any of us, might have been born the day before yesterday,” he said with his boyish, disarming smile, “in the very Garden of Eden itself, which surrounds us, and is never new.”
Even the outspoken Miss Prudence KiddeÂmaster failed to draw out of him anything like a complete history, which frequently exasperated her, and qualified the wild tone of her praise for him: and then again, as her fancy roamed, argued for his inviolable mysteryâand his integrity. “You cannot anticipate marriage with a man about whom so little is known,” her father said, badly shaken by Prudence's conversation with him, after the dramatic occasion of her fainting fit at the Bayards', “even ifâas you sayâhe has stepped forward in public to âclaim you.' We are not, I hope, barbarians here in Philadelphia!”
“And yet, dear Father,” Prudence said, “I
do
anticipateâa great deal. But we shall see.”
The Zinn family was scattered, John Quincy explained, with an air of uncharacteristic sadness: perhaps it had even died out, and he was the last of his line. Certainly both his parents were deadâand his only brother, a sailor on one of Commodore Perry's great men-of-war, had died of a mysterious fever off Smyrna, and was buried at sea.
The farm above Christiana?âah, long ago sold for taxes! It had never been very productive in any case, and young John Quincy had not greatly desired to take it over.
The first Zinn in the region, John Quincy's grandfather, was one Rudolph Zinn, an Austrian immigrant, who had, as a consequence of a severe wound suffered during an attack led by General Benjamin Lincoln against the British, remained in the Valley, evidently nursed back to health by a Quaker farm family. The young soldier had then married into the family, and taken up farming. A romantic outcome, Miss KiddeÂmaster judged, to a possibly tragic tale.
“I think not
romantic,
Miss KiddeÂmaster,” John Quincy Zinn said slowly, stroking his beard, “but, rather,
necessary.
For all events occur as they must, in a universe of fluidly interlocking parts.”
“I see,” said Prudence, staring and blushing; tho' in fact she did not.
Alas, John Quincy Zinn's vague history of his background was
untrue!
âand one can only gauge the depth of his feeling for Prudence KiddeÂmaster, and his anxiety lest he disappoint his Philadelphia patrons, by our knowledge of how he abominated falsehood. And it may be, too, that the young man's immersion in books, and his frequently obsessive speculation upon the “nature of the Universe,” had blurred his memory of particulars, especially as they touched upon
Evil.
(For, as we have seen, Mr. Zinn was passionately resistant to the very concept of
Evil,
judging that it could have no place in God's benign machinery.)
There had been, indeed, a Rudolph Zinn, a private in General Lincoln's infantry, and he was John Quincy Zinn's grandfather; but the “Zinn” connection was less legal than one might likeâmeaning by this that
illegitimacy
figured in John Quincy's background.
Zinn
was the young soldier's name, but
Zinn,
alas, never became the official name of the seventeen-year-old girl who bore his child, and fled away with it, upon the occasion of Zinn's execution in the spring of 1786. (For Zinn was executed, along with eleven other mutineers, on a parade ground in Morristown, New Jerseyâan ignominious death, and yet one befitting a rebel, especially during such perilous times.)
It is not known, and surely the loss is not a significant one, what the surname was of the young woman who was John Quincy Zinn's paternal grandmother: enough for us to record that
Zinn
was the name she appropriated, as she appropriated from somewhere a plain, very thin gold wedding band, thereby deeming herself “wed,” and the equal of any married woman she passed on the street! Her lover having been shot by a firing squad, she took her abrupt leave of Morristown and went to live with relatives in the village of Shaheen Falls, New York, where her illegitimate son, though unbaptized in any church, was known by the proud name of
John Jay Zinn
âthis name being an indication more of the young mother's impetuous optimism, or of her simple ignorance, than her patriotic regard for the illustrious John Jay: for Mr. Jay, like George Washington, Alexander Hamilton, Henry Knox, and, indeed, General Benjamin Lincoln himself (who had, after all, ordered the mutineer Zinn's summary execution), and many another gentleman of the great Federalist party, was surely no friend of such desperadoes, vagabonds, and shiftless laborers from foreign shores, as she and her family no doubt were; and would have had little patience with her complaints, or with the ceaseless mob demands of her ilk. (And to think that the traitorous Daniel Shays and his rebels were yet to come, in the following year! Indeed, it is a wonder that the young nation did not expire in those early years, as George Washington so feared, beset on every side by rabble-rousers and self-styled “Republicans.”)
Rudolph Zinn and his fellow mutineers were partly justified in their discontent, certainly, for they were in the unfortunate position, as soldiers in the Continental Army, of receiving their 22¢ daily salary in Continental currency, first issued in 1775, but, as the war continued, depreciating in its value some forty timesâwell-nigh worthless, in fact, by 1786, when various isolated mutinies flared up, and soldiers refused to accept payment in such currency, and in some cases (in Zinn's case, it may be inferred) incited others against accepting it. Discontent of this sort, coupled with the hardships of long winters and insufficient supplies, and rumors of Federalist money-making speculations, are perhaps comprehensible; but surely cannot excuse traitorous uprisings within the Continental Army, at a time when unity was so very necessary. So young Zinn was shot down, with eleven comrades, and buried in a pauper's grave, no doubt a mass grave, somewhere in Morristown, New Jersey: and one can hardly fault John Quincy, for choosing not to dwell upon his grandfather's fate. How much kinder, how much more idealistic, to imagine him as a soldier wounded in the service of his young country, and nursed back to health by a Quaker family in southeastern Pennsylvania!
Thus the grandfather, dead at the age of twenty-nine; and the father, tho' living to his fifties, doomed to suffer a particularly horrific death, an execution, too, of sortsâ
tarred
and
feathered
and
hanged,
and
set ablaze,
by a drunken lynch mob, in the foothills of the Blue Mountains, in southern Pennsylvania.