A Bond of Three (24 page)

F
EYAR
REMAINED
kneeling at Sorran’s feet, leaning against him, while Tanish kept his arm around Sorran’s shoulders. Sorran studied his hands for a moment before speaking.

“I have always known that I was… different.”

Tanish said nothing, but squeezed his shoulder, reassuring Sorran of his presence. He could feel Sorran growing calmer as he continued to speak.

Feyar did not break eye contact with Sorran.

“When I was very young, I began to have dreams. I would share these with my parents, and not long after that, I was told to relate them to my father’s advisers.”

“Why would they want to know your dreams?” Feyar asked with a frown.

Sorran sighed. “Because the events I saw in my dreams later came to pass.”

There was a moment’s silence.

Tanish stared at him. “By the heavens,” he whispered. “I have read of such things, but never have I met someone whose dreams were prophetic.” He gazed in wonder at Sorran.

“Are all your dreams thus?” Feyar asked.

Sorran shook his head. “I have a… sense sometimes of which dreams have import.” He looked from Feyar to Tanish. “I saw how to help your father because of a dream.”

Tanish smiled at him. “For which I will be forever grateful.” He kissed Sorran softly on the lips, and Sorran gave a little sigh before straightening. “So you have prophetic dreams. There is more, yes?”

Sorran nodded. “When I look at people, sometimes I… see things. Colors that flicker around them, and these colors change all the time.”

“Do you see colors when you gaze upon me?” Tanish twisted on the bench to look fully at Sorran.

Sorran swallowed. “Yes, and Feyar also.” His dark skin lost some of its color. “When… when I first laid eyes upon you, Tanish, and saw the colors that surrounded you, they spoke to me.” His breathing quickened and his pupils dilated.

Tanish grasped his hand and squeezed it. “You are afraid.” When Sorran nodded, Tanish tightened his grip. “Have no fear,
dorishan
. Tell it all.”

Sorran drew in several deep breaths. “From the manner in which my body reacted to your presence, I knew that… that you were the one who had drawn me here.”

Tanish became still. “You
knew
this?” He heard the hitch in Feyar’s breathing.

“Yes.” Sorran sounded miserable. “And when I met Feyar and had the same reaction, I was utterly confused. How could I be destined for two men?”

“
Oh
.” Feyar let out a long, drawn-out breath. “Now it becomes clear. This is how you knew Tanish and I loved each other. You saw it in our colors.”

Sorran gave one slow nod.

Tanish could not hold back any longer. “You are telling us that we three were destined to be together? That Feyar and I had no say? That it was somehow Fate that brought us to this place and time?” His heart pounded.

Feyar reached across and laid a hand on his knee. “Peace, my
terushan
. We
all
have a destiny. Your destiny is to be king, yes? It is the same with Sorran. Both of you had no control over that. Is it so difficult, then, to accept that there are forces that govern our lives, shape our future, match us with those who would complete us?” He took a breath. “If I had been born in Vancor, my life would have been very different. But I was born
here
, to be
Seruan
… to meet you two.” His face flushed.

Tanish stared at him. “You… you accept this?” His throat tightened.

Feyar nodded. “From the start I could not hate Sorran, although I had determined to do so with every breath.” Sorran gave him a startled glance and winced. Feyar grabbed his hand and held it tight. “Peace,
dorishan
. You know how it was with us.” Sorran regarded him in silence and then nodded slowly. Feyar smiled and rose up on his knees to kiss him on the mouth. Then he sank back onto the ground to peer intently at Tanish. “Perhaps we
are
destined to be together. Tell me you do not feel some echo of this inside you, in your heart, your soul.”

Tanish studied him. For a moment he could not speak. “What happened this morning?”

Sorran sighed. “For one brief moment, you both shared some part of me. I do not know how this came to be.”

Suddenly Tanish remembered the events of the previous evening. “I… I had a similar experience, only fragmentary, when I released inside you.”

Feyar frowned. “Yet I did not.”

Sorran’s eyes grew wide. “We were not joined. But this morning….”

Tanish nodded. “This morning the three of us were joined, as one flesh.” He caught his breath. “And we all felt it.”

“Then this sharing is strongest when we are together.” Feyar’s face was triumphant. “It confirms your vision, Sorran. We were meant to be thus. There is a bond between us, one that grows stronger when the three of us are one flesh.”

Tanish closed his eyes, letting Feyar’s words sink into his mind.

Feyar gave a shout. “We have forgotten something of importance.” When Tanish and Sorran stared at him, he smiled. “The carving in the ruined temple. Does it not also speak to you of destiny?”

It was all too much for Tanish. He released Sorran’s shoulders and put his head in his hands. “How can you accept that our lives are naught but the playthings for some greater power?”

He felt Feyar move closer to kneel before him. “
Corishan
, what is the Maker if not a greater power who created us?” His voice was soft. “I believe we are all here for a purpose. The only difference is that Sorran’s destiny was revealed to him.” He leaned forward and kissed the top of Tanish’s head. “He was made for
us
, Tanish. That bond I spoke of, do you not feel it grow each day that we are together?” He placed two fingers under Tanish’s chin and turned his face upward. “Speak the truth, my
terushan
.”

Tanish looked deep into Feyar’s eyes and then turned to gaze at Sorran, who watched them both.

“Do you wish me to leave?” Sorran asked him, his lip trembling. “If you say the word, Tanish, we can call off the wedding, and I will return to Vancor.”

“No!” Tanish’s skin grew icy at the thought. “You must not leave.”

“Do you say this because of the alliance between Teruna and Vancor?” Feyar demanded. “Or is it your heart that speaks?”

Tanish became still and thought for a moment.

Be honest. We demanded as much from Sorran.

He raised his chin and regarded his lovers. “I speak from the heart.” His words came out as a whisper.

There was a moment’s hesitation before Sorran and Feyar threw their arms around him and held him, their heads coming together.

Tanish let out a heartfelt sigh. “Say you will not leave,
dorishan
.” He could not bear the thought of losing the quiet, dark prince who seemed to have worked his way under Tanish’s skin and into his heart.

“I will not leave,” Sorran promised him in a whisper before kissing him tenderly on the mouth. Tanish responded with eagerness, his heart soaring when Feyar joined them, their lips melding in a sweet kiss as they embraced. In the comfortable silence that followed, Tanish drank in their presence, letting it seep into him, strengthening him.

Sorran broke the silence. “I would ride down to the sea with you both. May we?”

Tanish straightened. The idea appealed to him. “I will make it so.” He met Feyar’s gaze. “For all of us.”

Feyar’s joyous smile lit up his face, and Tanish felt something ease inside him. Yet still there remained within him thoughts he would not share with his lovers.

Thoughts that felt like a betrayal of all he had said to them.

F
EYAR
DID
not know what had awoken him. The bedchamber was bathed in the bluish hue of moonlight, and beside him, Sorran lay sleeping, his breathing deep and regular.

Feyar gazed at him fondly. Sorran had to be exhausted. He had swum in the sea until both Feyar and Tanish had been forced to drag him, laughing, from the water. It was clear he loved the ocean. By the time they dined, Sorran was yawning.

Beyond Sorran, the space Tanish had occupied lay empty. Feyar knew his lover’s habits and glanced toward the window. Tanish stood on the balcony, his back to them. Feyar rose from the bed, careful not to disturb the sleeping Sorran, and went quietly across the chamber to join Tanish in the cool night air.

Tanish turned to look at him as he approached. “Go back to bed,
corishan
.” He did not smile.

Feyar’s chest tightened.
Something is wrong.

Ignoring Tanish’s words, he put his arms around the slender, familiar body and held him close. He brought his lips to Tanish’s ear. “What ails you, my
terushan
?”

Tanish leaned against him, and there was such a heavy air about him that Feyar felt as if a cold hand clutched his heart. “So Destiny sent Sorran to us. Does this mean that I must love him? That
you
should love him too?”

Feyar was stunned into silence for a moment. He tried to work out the meaning of Tanish’s words, but nothing came to him. “I do not understand.”

Tanish rested his head against Feyar’s shoulder. “I accept that Sorran was sent here for a purpose, but does that purpose include me falling in love with him? Have I no say?”

Feyar laughed quietly. “Tanish, he is going to be your husband. This marriage may have its roots in politics, but it
will
be a marriage. Surely you will grow to love him?”

“But that is not the same thing,” Tanish protested. “If I love him, it will be
my
choice, not something preordained over which I have no control.”

Feyar could not hold in his chuckle. “Oh, my
corishan
, did you make a conscious choice to fall in love with me?” When Tanish said nothing, he smiled. “Of course you did not. Do any of us
choose
with whom we fall in love? I do not think love is like that. Love is like a lightning bolt from the sky. We cannot choose where it will strike.”

Tanish gazed at him in silence for a moment and then smiled. “When did you grow to be so wise?”

Feyar pulled him close. “Then you know I speak the truth, yes?” Tanish nodded against his chest. “And Sorran is already falling in love.”

“What do you mean? How can you know that?”

Feyar ran his fingers through Tanish’s hair and kissed his cheek. “When we were on the point of release, did you not hear his words? Perhaps you were too lost in ecstasy to take them in. ‘
My
terushani
’—my loves. Those were words uttered in the heat of passion. I am not certain that Sorran is aware he uttered them.” He kissed Tanish once more. “But as each day passes, Sorran grows more dear to me.”

Tanish stared at him. “And yet knowing that does not hurt me. How can this be?” He shook his head. “I never thought that I could love another as I love you, and the thought of you loving someone else would have driven a sword into my very heart before Sorran came. But when I see you together, it feels….”

“It feels
right
,” Feyar said with a smile. When Tanish let out his breath in a long push of air and relaxed into his arms, Feyar knew his lover accepted his words. “All will be well, Tanish. Destiny’s plan for all of us will become clear within time. Let us wait to see what each new day brings.”

“The bed is so empty without you.” Sorran’s quiet voice drifted from the bedchamber.

Tanish smiled. “Someone needs us.” He took hold of Feyar’s hand and led him back to the bed.

Feyar glanced to where Sorran awaited them, arms outstretched. Sorran’s smile when Tanish climbed onto the bed and enfolded him in his arms made Feyar’s heart glad.

This is right.

S
ORRAN
AND
Tanish had shared breakfast and were sitting in the garden. It had become a daily habit during the last few weeks, though it was rare for Feyar to join them in the mornings. Sorran enjoyed that quiet time most when it was the three of them. He was content to sit in the tranquil garden with them, with no need of conversation but a comfortable silence.

“How was His Majesty when you saw him this morning?” Tanish had left Sorran and Feyar in their bed to visit his father. On his return, he was quiet.

Tanish sighed. “He grows weaker. Malin fears that the end is near.”

Sorran clasped Tanish’s hand. “I pray he lives to see us wed.” Only little more than a week remained until the wedding. Sorran grew more and more excited as the day drew closer. The thought of becoming Tanish’s husband filled him with pleasure. Sorran’s joy was tempered with sadness, however.

King Feolin may yet live to see our wedding, but Feyar will not be there to witness it.

Feyar would be behind a trellis, hidden from view. The thought weighed heavy on Sorran’s mind.

I would share that day with Feyar, our lover. Yet none may know of that love.

“It is my prayer also,” Tanish admitted, squeezing Sorran’s hand.

Sorran had almost lost the train of conversation, so lost was he in his own thoughts. “What does Feyar do in the
Seruanal
when he is not with you?” Sorran wanted to know. It saddened him that they could not be together all the time. There were times when he missed Feyar greatly. “Must he… service others?” It was the most delicate way he could phrase the question, not wishing to cause offense. His stomach clenched at the thought of Feyar making love to others.

I know that is his role, but to think of him thus makes my heart ache.

Tanish shook his head. “Since our first time together, he has only been with me. And each morning he walks into the city.”

“What does he do there?”

Tanish’s smile was sad. “It is a pilgrimage of sorts. He goes to the house of his mother and sister.”

“But I thought—” Sorran frowned. “Erinor, the young
Seruan
I helped, told me that he cannot see his family.”

Tanish nodded. “This is true. Feyar goes to watch over them for a few hours. He sees them go about their daily lives, oblivious to his surveillance. It is not much, but it is a comfort to him.”