A Bridge Unbroken (A Miller's Creek Novel) (33 page)

His finger tightened on the trigger. Yeah, blame it on her, you disgusting... Chance brought the thought under control.

Kane pulled Dakota's head to his chest and stroked her red curls. "Don't you know you belong to me?"

Dakota shivered uncontrollably.

In the next instant, Ernie and Carter stood beside him, revolvers drawn and trained on the mad man who cradled Dakota in his evil embrace. Carter spoke in a slow and soothing voice. "Stand up and put your hands above your head, and no one will get hurt."

Kane rose to his feet, but pulled Dakota in front of him, effectively blocking his body with hers. A shot sounded, and Kane slumped to the floor, left hand on his right shoulder and a dazed expression on his face.

Dakota, no longer confined by Kane's clutches, raced across the room toward Chance, placed both arms around his waist and her head against his chest, sobbing.

Chance let the gun slip to the floor and leaned it against the wall, the reality of all that had just taken place coming into focus once more. He gripped Dakota's shoulders and pushed her away.

She stared up into his eyes, horrified. "Please don't do this, Chance. At least give me the opportunity to explain."

He turned to Carter. "Y'all got this?"

His friend frowned and nodded.

Numb, Chance stumbled out the door, relieved that the battle was over, but too dazed and too sick to consider anything else.

Chapter Thirty

C
louds hung low and dark as Dakota finished up feeding the chickens, proof that a winter storm was on the way. Two weeks had passed with no call, no visit, no nothing from Chance.

The stabbing pain in her chest returned. She closed her eyes against the pain and leaned against the old weathered wood of the barn. She'd been right all along. Chance would never forgive her for giving their baby up for adoption. But being right didn't lessen the pain, nor did it bring satisfaction. And it was her own fault. Hadn't she sworn off ever falling in love again? And bit by bloody bit, she'd allowed herself to fall in love with the one she could never have.

Lord, I'm not asking for you to bring him back to me. That's the last thing I deserve. But I do pray for his sake that he'll someday forgive me, so he won't be locked behind bars for as long as I was.

The pain intensified, and she brought a hand to her chest to rub it away. On the deepest of levels she understood his hurt. Even after all these years, whenever she saw a dark-haired little girl with the same blue-gray eyes as his, her heart ripped open just a little bit more. Tears dripped from her chin and plopped to the dusty ground. Already she'd cried bucket loads, enough to fill the dry creek bed in a July drought. But crying wouldn't change anything. Wouldn't bring him back. Wouldn't change the past. Wouldn't undo what had already been done.

She straightened and moved toward the house, Daisy right behind. The best thing for  her to do right now was to get so involved in the story-world of her new book that everything else faded away. Surprisingly enough, since the day Chance walked away without looking back, her words seemed to flow as generously as her tears. Almost as though the pain of losing him forever served as a catalyst to transfer her emotions to the page.

Her phone jingled in her pocket. She pulled it out and examined the screen. Gracie. A big part of her was tempted not to answer. After all it wouldn't be long until she'd have to leave that relationship behind as well. But answering it was the right thing to do. Gracie and Matt had been so kind and generous. "Hello?"

A relieved sigh sounded through the phone. "Glad I finally got a hold of you. Why haven't you returned my calls?"

Dakota kicked at the dry dirt with the toe of her boot. "Sorry. I just wasn't in a place where I could talk." At least not without breaking down.

"I understand, trust me, I do. But it's not good for you to lock yourself away from everyone. Can I come out to see you?"

Everything in  her wanted to say no, but she couldn't. It might be painful, especially when it came time to say goodbye, but the last thing she wanted was to hurt her friend. "I guess so."

"I'll be there in a few minutes."

Dakota flipped her phone shut, climbed the porch steps, and entered through the front door of the farmhouse that no longer resembled the shell of a house she'd found just a few months earlier. It had taken a while to feel safe here after the incident with Kane, but for now he was behind bars, and the police and Sheriff's Department made regular visits to check on her.

A cynical laugh fell from her mouth as she slouched to the couch and stared at the ceiling. Finally safe after all these years, but the running away wasn't over. Tomorrow she'd visit with the new realtor in town. Once the house sold, she'd pay Chance what she owed him. Hopefully it would be enough to jumpstart his dream of opening the drugstore. As for her, she'd do what she'd done continuously her entire life.

Cut her losses and move on.

* * *

"You sure you can live with that decision?" Matt lobbed the words and fell back against the sofa in his and Gracie's beautiful home.

Chance took in his best friend's tight-lipped frown. Maybe trying to talk to Matt about the matter wasn't wise. He and Gracie had both grown fond of Dakota during her stay with them. But could he live with the decision to sever all ties with the woman who'd once more captured his heart only to break it?

The familiar ache returned. But with expertise gained over the past couple of weeks, he conjured up a mental image of what she'd done. His heart turned to stone.

"Maybe you just need more time."

Chance shook his head forcefully. "Nope. My mind's made up. I won't pretend that nothing happened, and I won't excuse what she did."

"No one's asking you to." Matt leaned forward and made eye contact. "But you need to forgive her because it's the right thing to do."

Frustration built until he thought he'd explode. Chance raked a hand across the top of his head. "And just how am I supposed to do that?" His voice broke, and he lowered his head to his hands. That's what hurt most of all. Yes, he'd been angry at her. Had blamed her for the entire incident. But had his attitude and treatment of her been the catalyst for her running away? He balled up a hand and slammed it against his knee.

Matt leaned back and released a slow breath. "What is it Chance? There's something you're not saying."

He swallowed against the lump in his throat. "I just feel so guilty." Where had that come from?

His friend's light brown eyes softened. "Good. You had me worried there for a sec."

Chance snapped to attention, his back stiff. Good that he felt guilty?

Matt chuckled. "Sorry. That's just my version of shock treatment."

Well, between Matt's version and the real version, he'd gotten off pretty easy.

"Why do you feel guilty?"

Discomfort crawled up Chance's spine as he considered the question. Okay, this wouldn't be easy, but if Matt could help him get past all the twisted emotions inside, it would be well worth it. "For a long time, I blamed Dakota for what happened that night. In some ways I still do."

"That's projection, my friend." Matt certainly had no qualms about laying it all out on the table. "It happens when we can't handle our own poor behavior and move all the blame to someone else's shoulder."

Was he projecting his blame on her? Is that why he felt so bad?

"So after that night so many years ago, what happened between you two?"

"I quit going to the farm. Just kind of shut down and pretended she didn't even exist. I didn't see her for several weeks, but then she showed up at a baseball game the weekend of  the Watson family reunion. My parents were down, along with aunts and uncles and cousins." Chance allowed the scenes to replay in his memory. "We'd all gone to the ballpark, and I was hanging out with my cousin Brittany when I saw Dakota coming toward us, looking through crowds of people as though searching for someone."

"You."

"Yeah." He closed his eyes, briefly transported back to that muggy autumn evening. "She saw me and smiled." Then her smile had disappeared, like the sun going behind a cloud. For an eternity. "She saw my cousin and assumed the worst. I tried to run after her, but there were too many people. I told my parents I was leaving. They saw how upset I was and wanted to come with me."

His friend's face held compassion, as though he had already guessed the final outcome. "And then?"

Chance clamped his jaw tight and ran a hand across his equally taut lips. Never had he' discussed this with anyone other than  and Dakota. "We headed toward the farm. I was driving too fast, but I was scared because she had a thing about running away when life got too hard to handle. Something just clicked inside me. I knew I didn't want to lose her."

The knot in his throat made it impossible to squeeze out another word. Even after all these years, the memories were crystal clear and vivid. His mother's screams. The headlights bearing down on them. The sickening crunch of metal against metal and the sound of shattering glass. His head snapping against the glass, and the world going black. "It was weeks before I could function, and then I learned about Mom and Dad." He paused to regain control of his emotions.

"And you blamed Dakota for the wreck?"

"Yeah." Blamed her for something that was his fault.

"You think Dakota realized how much you blamed her when she came back a few months ago?"

He nodded shamefully. Hadn't he made sure she'd known it?

"Chance, why do you think the Bible's so explicit about forgiveness?"

Chance opened his mouth to answer, but Matt kept going, unrelenting.

"Is there anything you've ever done that God hasn't forgiven? Did you have to somehow earn His forgiveness? When Christ forgave you from the cross, did He wait for you to apologize, ask for forgiveness, or change?"

He jumped in before Matt had a chance to turn the screws any tighter. "Okay, okay, I get your point, but I'm not Jesus. I can't do this. At least not right now. Besides, there's no guarantee that even if I could forgive her, anything would change in our relationship. There's just too much garbage from the past."

Matt nodded. "Agreed on the last point. Both of you have to be willing to bring about reconciliation, and I'm not sure you're there."

The blow to his gut doubled him over, elbows on knees, head in his hands. He'd worked so hard to show Dakota he was willing to reconcile as they'd worked on the house and bridge. In spite of her reluctance, slowly her heart had opened like a rose bud waiting for the sun's warmth to unfurl its blossoms. Now here he was on the opposite side of the fence, unwilling to take even a step in that direction. A sigh escaped. "Part of me wants it to work, but then..."

"...then you feel like there's a boulder in the way you just can't crawl over?"

Exactly.

"I can't make this decision for you, Bud, but you know how I feel. She's had a rough life and needs you more than she'll ever let on." Matt patted his back. "And you may not be Jesus, but His power's in you. He can give you the strength to blast that boulder to smithereens."

His friend's choice of words elicited a smile.
Thank You, God, for Matt. Help me to forgive Dakota as You've so graciously forgiven me.
"Thanks. Keep us both in your prayers."

"You know it."

Chance stood and made his way across the room. At the door he grabbed hold of the knob, then turned toward Matt. "If I don't see you between now and then, y'all have a Merry Christmas."

"You, too. You got plans?"

Chance shook his head. The first Christmas without Grampa. Without anyone, for that matter.

"The whole gang will be at Mama Beth's. You know you're welcome."

"I'll think about it. Give Gracie my love. Where is she anyway?"

"Gone to see Dakota."

Meddlers, the both of them, but how could he protest? They loved him and Dakota and weren't the kind of people to not intervene. Chance sent Matt a goodbye smile, then exited the house.

He climbed into his truck, his mind on all he needed to say and do to get past this. Sometime tomorrow, he'd make a trip to check on Dakota, to see where they stood, to see if there was a chance at reconciliation. But for now, his time would be better spent at home. On his knees.

Chapter Thirty-One

A
gentle knock sounded at the front door. Had Chance finally come to his senses? Dakota flew down the stairs and yanked open the door.

Her spirit deflated. She'd half-hoped to see Chance standing there. Instead it was his new boss, dressed in nice blue jeans and a sweater. What was he doing all the way out here? And what was his name again? She quickly searched her memory for their introduction the night of the hospital benefit, but nothing came to mind. "Hi. Can I help you?"

He smiled, a disarming kind of smile that immediately put her at ease. "Hi, Dakota. You might not remember me. I'm Jeremy Gains, the new hospital administrator." He stretched out a hand.

Dakota took his hand, her stomach in knots. Was Chance okay? Had he come to deliver bad news? She forced the frown from her face and took his hand, her lips closed in a polite smile. "Yes, Jeremy, I remember you. Is Chance okay?"