A Fire That Burns (27 page)

    
Laughing,
Austin let her brother’s and Tyler’s
enthusiasm douse
her with their plans for the future of this house. Now she finally felt like
this house was going to be the start of something amazing, as long as problems
didn’t arise.

Chapter Forty-Seven

THE
following day,
Austin sat in her parent’s living room with Tyler and the three newcomers.
Tyler had just arrived and Jane was outside in the garden while the others worked
at the house. Tyler had gone there, but they had forced him to leave and told
him to take a break.

 
“So when do you go back?” Austin
asked and yawned. She was tired of being
tired
, ironically.

“We got two weeks,” Emma commented, “Somehow we managed to get away for
that long.”

“Can the other teams cope without you for that long?” Austin teased
them, knowing how the FBI ran.

“It’s you that we’re all failing without,” Emma teased her back. “It’s
nothing to do with us.”

 
Jessica finished her drink and
agreed, “
It’s
weird how no other tech seems to be able
to meet up to the expectation you’ve set.”

“I wasn’t that great. I mean, I can’t profile like you guys, I can’t
even hold a gun without feeling I’m committing a sin,” Austin told them with a
nervous laugh, and then felt the room somehow begin to close in on her. The
idea of going back scared her, the idea of leaving Point Arena and leaving
Tyler terrified her. She felt stuck between a rock and a hard place and she
knew that whatever she chose, she would let people down. “I need a drink,”
Austin mentioned and started to get up, but Tyler stopped her from moving.
“I’ve got it, Handsome,” she told him, but he defied her immediately.

“Anyone else want a drink?” Tyler asked as he ignored her. Standing up,
he listened to everyone confirm before he
maneuvred
around the couch to walk passed Emma. “There’s a cab outside,” Tyler pointed
out as he headed off to go grab everyone’s drinks.

“Seems Liam and Michael didn’t hang around,” Emma commented as she
looked out of the window. “They find out, not even a day ago, that they can
take a vacation and here they are.”

Jessica stretched to look out as Emma went for the door. “Ooh! Michael
actually came!” Jessica exclaimed as she jumped up from her seat. “I didn’t
think he would come along.
Especially after your little
argument with him, Aussie.”

Austin sat up a little straighter at that, her eyes looking straight for
the window, “Michael’s here?” Austin asked and got up as Jessica disappeared
with Emma. She looked to Archie, her eyes a little wide. “Aren’t you going,
Arch?” she asked him, and saw him stand and look over to her. “I’m fine,” she
told him with a smile.

“Sure?” he asked her as Tyler came into the room from the doorway.

“Positive,” Austin told him with a smile, “I’ll be out in a moment. I
just need to turn off Tyler’s alpha side.”

Walking up to her, Tyler cocked a brow at her and pulled a questioning
look.
“Little argument?”
Tyler asked as he looked out
to the strangers getting out of the cab. “What happened there?”

“Something that shouldn’t have,” Austin admitted and looked up at Tyler
with a smile. “It’s nothing to worry about. He just didn’t like my work
efforts, and when he found out I was leaving, he tried to stop me.”

“He knew what an asset you were, Sunny,” Tyler told her with a bright
smile. “I know there’s more to it,
y’know
?”

“I swear you should actually be in the FBI the way you read me,” Austin
replied with a simple eye roll.

“I can only read you because I know you through and through,” Tyler
responded and finished the statement with a kiss. “Now go see your friends.
I’ll call your mom in and tell her they’re here.”

“Thanks, Handsome,” She said and watched him walk
towards
 
the
back door. Before heading out to
greet the other members of her team, Austin took a deep, soothing breath.
Walking out onto the porch, she looked at the two men as they walked up the
pavement - her boss and
Michael
.

Her third world now collided. She’d had her family accept her for who
she really was, she had the Armstrong’s welcome her back in, now she had to
have her FBI family accept her for her and accept her decisions in equal
amounts of grace. She knew whatever she decided; someone was going to get hurt.

Austin felt Tyler lace his arm around her waist gently as the men
approached. He was acting like a doting husband, proud of his wife, interested
in her achievements and her friends. However, Austin’s heart only raced faster
and faster as the nerves rushed through her veins.

“Let’s go meet the rest of your team eh, Baby?” Tyler asked almost
excitedly and guided her down the steps to meet the men half way. “This Michael
sounds like my kind of guy.”

    
All Austin
could do was
nod
her head and gulp back her nerves.
How did she introduce two men that loved her wholeheartedly to one another?
Especially when she knew she would break one of their hearts?

Chapter Forty-Eight

I
am capable!” Austin
snapped at Michael, she felt like he was following her through the house. They
were the last two to go outside and Michael had literally shadowed her. She
took the tray from him and placed it on the counter top. “I am not a cripple,
Michael, so for God sake’s stop treating
me
like one!”

“Sorry,” he murmured to her, his eyes apologetically surveying her.
Since seeing her injuries as a result of the fire, he was racked with worry and
felt the need to not let her out of his sights. She was hurt and that scared
him beyond any imaginable lengths. “I just worry.”

“Yeah, I know that,” Austin scoffed disbelievingly. “You do not need to
make up anything to me, so stop walking around with that
groveling
look.”

“I do owe you though,” he told her sorrowfully. He might have been in
this town for a day, but since he arrived he had watched Austin in the arms of
Tyler and it was making him bend and break. He watched her look at him and he
knew he didn’t stand a chance, that he had broken the tie between them. “I’ve
missed you.” Michael said as he pushed her against a wall and stopped her from
leaving him entirely without clearing the air between them. “That’s all. I miss
what we had. The intensity, the chemistry, Austin, I miss you so, so much.”

Austin looked up into Michael’s crystal blue eyes and felt mesmerized in
the intensity of his irises. It was almost as if their last encounter wasn’t so
bitter. His payback for her decision still stung, especially considering she
had allowed their relationship to intensify and develop. Austin had every
reason to run back home and the person she had grown closest to had made her
feel like she didn’t have that right. He had made her feel selfish for deciding
what she needed to do to make herself happiest.

That was why everything that came from his lips wasn’t setting her heart
on fire anymore, nor did it make her see a promising future. That was why all
she saw was lies and a player as he tried to grab a saving grace and rekindle a
relationship he had trampled on.

It was that very reason that she realized again that no man would ever
take over Tyler’s hold on her heart.

As he spoke, she had to close her eyes and shake her head. She was just
hoping that no one came in, or that her mother didn’t come back downstairs. She
didn’t want to have to explain this just yet. She didn’t want to have to
explain her way out of a situation that was dead as done between her and this
man.

“I love you, Aus,” he told her honestly, trying to open her eyes. His
hand came up to brush her hair back behind her ear and he lavished the feel of
her soft skin against his. “I’ve missed you so much it hurts, Babe.
So much.
I regret everything. It’s you I love.”

Austin pushed him away with a huff and went for the back door, “Things
have changed, Mike. People change,” she admitted warningly and began to head
outside to the sanctuary of knowing that Michael would not tell her this when
they were outside. “You sure showed how much you love me the moment you hooked
up with several girls, right in front of my eyes, and decided you were going to
show
me what I was missing out on.”

Getting outside she headed straight for the large table that everyone
was sitting around and went straight to Tyler’s side as he had kept the chair
next to him free. Regardless of what had happened, Tyler never flaunted another
girl in her face when they were an item. He was faithful and never lashed out
in such a callous and malicious way.

“Here you go, Sunny,” Tyler said as Austin sat down next to him. He held
up a large bowl full of ice cream and toppings – a typical
Strongson
ice cream bonanza. She hadn’t quite expected it, and it brought a smile back
onto her face. “Made exactly how we like it.”

“
Mmm
,” Austin sounded as she took the bowl and
licked her lips. “Best part of a meal.”

“Dessert before dinner?”
Liam asked as he watched Tyler hold up a bowl toppling over with ice
cream.

Austin smiled like a child for a moment, “
It’s
a
little tradition between me and Tyler.”

“Aussie always told me the dessert was the best part of a meal and she
didn’t want to die before she had it, so I was brought up on having meals
backwards,” Tyler chimed in happily as he remembered a past mantra that he and
Austin had lived by.

“And it hasn’t failed yet,” Austin commented in almost a sing song tone.
She grabbed the spoon and carried on eating as Tom pushed on with finding out
more about the team. She just continued and got lost in their words and remained
silent and thoughtful.

As Austin finished the last spoonful, she realized that the icy feeling
in her wasn’t from the copious amounts of ice cream, but more due to the
glances from Michael. “I’m going to go see how long until dinner,” Austin
commented and pushed
herself
up. “I’m still starving,”
she covered up her excuse with a smile. She wanted to get away from the
crossfire that was slowly erupting between Tyler and Michael.

“I’m going to check on her,” Michael said after a few moments of awkward
silence. He got up and looked at Tyler, “Unless...” he trailed off
questioningly wondering if Tyler would like to go.

“No, it’s fine. Go ahead,” Tyler said with a smile and watched the man
smile gratefully before turning on his heels and heading into the house. “They
seem a bit tense around one another,” Tyler commented as he watched Michael try
and apologize to Austin as she went and helped her mom out.

“He didn’t like the fact that she left. Their relationship broke down
when she announced it,” Emma told Tyler, and hoped that for now, that response
was enough to hold off any more questions. She knew, from Tyler’s stone-like
look that he had on his face, it wouldn’t hold out for long.

Tyler knew there was more to this collision of two friends than met the
eye, but he would stand beside Austin until she told him. It didn’t stop him
from knowing there was more to learn where Michael was concerned; and it didn’t
stop the bottom of his stomach from rumbling with jealousy.

    
An emotion
Tyler prayed wouldn’t get the better of him.

Chapter Forty-Nine

IF
an afternoon could
sharply change, Austin now knew exactly how. She was on the spot and feeling
very exposed and vulnerable.

“Liam, he wants you back. He wants you back on the team,” Jessica
started to tell Austin as they sat outside in the unseasonably warm October
evening. The other three men had taken residence in a motel just around the
corner, not wanting to infringe on the Pearson’s. Now as they waited for Liam
and Michael to arrive for dinner, Jessica felt it was time to admit a few home
truths to Austin, “The unit isn’t working as well without you. You were the
only tech that wasn’t afraid to hack whatever to get whatever.”

“I-I,” Austin felt like all eyes were on her, “I don’t know.”

“We’re not pressing you, Aus, but we just wanted you to consider it,”
Emma dropped in abruptly, noticing the look of fear as it ignited upon the
entire surface of Austin’s face.

Archie, flipping his hair out of his face, looked at Austin’s expression
and felt nervous, “Statistically, our cases have almost doubled in length since
you left.”

“We just don’t function without you,” Jessica told her sadly. “It’s you
that brought us together and it’s you that kept us afloat. We just want you
back,” she quickly caved and admitted the initial true nature of their visit to
California. It was selfish, but they were sinking and they were now desperate.

Austin looked at her friend, a woman who had become her family in such a
short space of time, “I can’t. I don’t want to.” She told her truthfully, “I
love it in New York, but I love it here more and I’m happy here. I want my life
here.”

“There’s another reason,” Tom jumped in as he sat and watched his little
sister. If there was anyone, other than Tyler that knew her, it was him and he
wanted to know. “What else?”

Looking up, Austin now understood what a deer caught in the headlights
felt like. She hated every second of it and wanted to bolt.

“Tell,” Tom told her, leaning back in his seat with his arms crossed
over his chest. “What else is it?”

“I hated the nightmares,” Austin admitted softly and felt exposed and
vulnerable.

Jessica and Emma exchanged looks with one another as they understood
that matter immediately. Austin was alone on the nightmare side of the job, and
she would always be. The rest of the team had more time together than anything;
they could profess what was going on more in their minds. Austin hadn’t gained
that ability.

“Dreams and nightmares are the minds way of metabolizing the stimulus it
received prior to sleep,” Archie jumped in trying to save the moment, “It’s
perfectly healthy.”

“It is not perfectly healthy!” Austin suddenly had a massive outburst.
“It is not normal to dream of those murders and feel what those victims felt. It
is not normal! Just because you guys have had training and can compartmentalize
and whatever else you do, does not mean I can!” As she finished she got up,
supporting her tender arm and left everyone in the garden and went into the
house, going straight to her old bedroom. She didn’t expect herself to have
that sort of outburst, but no one knew the unthinkable horrors that had crossed
her screens. No one knew what her dreams twisted into and no one would know the
amount of pain she was caused by just going to sleep.

No one prepared the naive, lost woman that messed around with the wrong
software and got caught. She was a self-taught hacker from watching her
brother, and she paid a high price for it.

Even now, she was still young and naive and had a perfectly brightly
colored
outlook of the world.
 
She wasn’t experienced for that job; it was
the one thing that had pushed her to come home. She had done her duties, was
set free, and she wanted a life again. She knew if she stayed with the FBI she
wouldn’t get that.

It was with each new case that her yearn to have Tyler around had grown;
and it was with each new
Unsub
caught that she had
wanted to go home, but she was trapped in New York. The worst part of it all
was that she had developed connections with the team, had grown to love them,
and she had to leave yet another family to gain back the other.

Sitting on the bed she pulled a pillow to her chest and cried into it.
There were multiple demons she had to face to overcome this moment. She knew
she had to completely let Tyler in. The biggest demon she had been scared of
was making a family of her own. The one she had yearned for since losing the
baby and New York wasn’t giving her the man that was in her dreams – Point
Arena was.

A soft knock came from the door and Austin looked up and wiped her face
before summoning in whoever was there. She tried to breathe in the calm and
prayed her face wasn’t a red and blotchy mess. She was pleased it was Tyler who
walked in and no one else. Any of the team would have made her carry on being
angry as a
defense
mechanism and any of her family
would have made her break down into a bawling mess. Tyler calmed her enough to
make her see sense and talk it out calmly and collectively before breaking
down.

 
“I’ll be down in a bit,” Austin
told him, offering a feeble reassuring grin.

 
He ignored her and went over and
climbed onto the bed, sitting next to her, “I’m not leaving you.”

 
“I’m fine,” she lied strongly to
him.

 
“Something more happened than
just those cases,” Tyler told her sincerely as he took her hand in his. He had
realized the moment she had kicked off that something more than just nightmares
had happened. Right now, he wasn’t leaving until he got the God’s honest
answer. “What was it?”

 
Austin sighed, “I familiarized too
much.” Austin admitted to him, and sniffed back the tingle in her nose as it
told her a new bout of tears was coming. “I was given a brief training, but
when you’re there, living it, you can’t help it. You see people lose the people
they love and you can’t help but empathize, and get involved. Especially when
you felt like you had lost everyone you loved yourself.”

Feeling his chest constrict, Tyler hated to hear how broken Austin felt
over how her life had come to be. He had always expected her decision to run as
a life choice and losing everyone was just the consequences of her decision.

“There was one case,” Austin started quietly; “I was called out with the
team to use a computer at the scene.”

“They put you out there in the crime scene?” Tyler cut in angrily. His
thoughts consumed with Austin being forced into danger.

“I was surrounded by six FBI agents, millions of police. I was safe,”
She calmed him gently. “There was a woman that was held captive and she was
pregnant. As the guy brought her out, he shoved her towards me and she fell and
hit her stomach. In the time it took to get him talked down and arrested and
help getting to her she was bleeding and had bad stomach cramps. I saw it all
over again. That night I lost your baby. It all happened again. Right in that
moment,” Austin confessed and cried. “Her husband had died and the one thing
she had to remind her of him was taken from her too.”

“Oh, Baby,” Tyler sympathized as he put his arm around her and pulled
her close, cautious of her wounds still.

“She wouldn’t let me leave her and I was with her when she was told she
had lost the baby,” Austin sobbed, idling wiping the tears away so they could
be replaced with the newer flood. “The look on her face was exactly the same as
I had when I was told those words and I sat there thinking
wow, is this what
every woman feels when they lose a child?
” Austin continued as she stared
off. “That same empty feeling as the darkness took over that total feeling of
untouched heaven.”

 
Tyler’s silence was comforting to
her. He allowed her to have a sounding board for her woes to hit.

“Not even twenty-four hours later we got a phone call to tell us she was
found dead,” Austin finished, scarily quiet. Her tears still falling, but her
sobs now held back in a catatonic way. “She had killed herself because
everything she had left to live for was taken away from her.”

Tyler’s grip was getting harder as he held onto her hand still. He had
no words. Six years of building sentences and making dialogues for the moments
of the truth like this one were futile. He had no way to help her, but to
listen.

“That was the last case I did there. I had to come back as soon as
possible,” Austin admitted to him and cried heavily again. “I had to come back
for you.”

“And you did, Aus, you came back to where you’re supposed to be,” Tyler
told her sincerely. “Regardless, you came back for what was rightfully yours.”

“Why is the world so cruel though, Tyler?” Austin asked looking up at
the man she loved. “You’re still alive, regardless of our baby, but she had no
one.
Absolutely no one.”

“I don’t know why the world is so cruel, but that’s why we have people
like the bunch downstairs, the others coming over, and me, to fight back and
make sure it is just a little safer.”

“You’re destined for something more than a pokey little town, Handsome.
That unit is made for you,” Austin told him sorrowfully. “You would be
perfect.”

“But I wouldn’t be perfect if you’re not happy. I love this town, I love
this life now. I don’t plan to move because, at the end of the day, I want my
children to grow up like us.”

“Being caught in love triangles?” she asked him with a cocked brow.

Chuckling, Tyler kissed the top of her head, “Growing up with the love
of their life’s right next door.
Romance blossoming in the
front yard, loving your best friend to the max, and to know what having the
world at your feet feels like.
My best memories are filled with you,
Austin. From waking up in the morning, to watching you try and seduce me at
family meals. Hell, turning up at my work to get me to play. I want my kids to
experience a love like ours – of course, our kids won’t be getting it as young
as we did. They’re being kept on a leash until they’re fifty.”

Austin giggled and looked up at him, “Is that all you want?” Austin
asked him dubiously, wanting to know what he really craved out of life. What he
really wanted from her and she wanted to know if their dreams really matched
one another’s.

“Well,” he started, “I want your last name changed, the white picket fence,
and to kick start the good life. I want to show you that after everything I am
a changed man, and in a good way. I will never neglect you and I will never,
ever make you go a day worrying. I am going to spend the rest of my life making
my past mistakes up to you, but I will do it with every piece of my being. I
just want my life with you to begin properly.”

Austin sighed happily at that thought.

Tyler kissed her again before finalizing his thoughts, “For now though,
I’m happy enough having the love of my life all to myself.”

Feeling her heart balloon, Austin had never felt so elated to hear those
words again. It seemed her days lately were so full of ups and downs, battles
with her emotions, fights with her inner demons. Every time Tyler swore on his love
for her she felt her heart become more and more solidified and fortified.

Biting her lip hard, Austin felt the pain, but it wasn’t as much as the
pain another secret was causing her, “We need to talk about another matter.”

“I guessed,” Tyler told her presumptuously. “You love Michael, don’t
you?” Tyler asked Austin outright after a few moments of silence. It had been
something he had thought in the last couple of days as he had watched Austin
and Michael around one another. If anything, he expected there to be some
romance in Austin’s six year absence, and the pain and jealousy he felt over it
must have been what Austin had felt when she had watched him with Natasha.

“No,” she whispered to him. Austin felt like her body was frozen with
that question. She shook her head and looked to Tyler, “No, not like I love
you, but he
loves
me a lot like how you love me.”

    
Tyler now
felt like he was suddenly in a battle for Austin’s heart. He could lose it all
–
again
.