A Greater World (35 page)

Chapter Twenty-Four – Sacrifice

Lying in bed that night, unable to believe the import of the judge's words, she allowed herself some self-pity. Didn't she deserve to feel sorry for herself? As she faced the prospect of Kidd going to the gallows, she realised she did care for him in a strange, unfathomable way. Yes, surely she had the right to shed some tears into her pillow and rail against the unfairness of it all.

The night was long and sleep eluded her. As she tossed and turned in the big empty bed, she had never felt so alone. Everyone she'd ever cared for had been taken from her except for William and Verity. Was she cursed? Bringing disaster upon all those fool enough to get close to her? Her nerve endings felt exposed, painful, raw.

She missed Kidd. His gruffness and monosyllabic responses. His rough unromantic caresses. The long periods of silence and the barked orders. She had felt wanted and, recently, needed. He had a strange way of showing it – or rather he actively tried to cover it up, but she knew he'd become reliant on her and there was no mistaking the physical need he had for her. Eventually, she reflected, it was probably inevitable that such a dependency would give rise to some reciprocal feeling. It was not love and never could be, but there was a very real fondness on her part for him.

The icy chill she'd experienced when the judge pronounced his terrible sentence passed through her again whenever she thought about what awaited Kidd. The words
"Hanged by the neck until you are dead"
conjured up terrifying images. She tried to put them out of her head and to banish the thought of that thin, wiry man dangling from a rope. Would it be a fast death? She knew enough to know it depended on the calibre of the executioner and how carefully he made his calculations.

'Stop it!' she cried aloud to herself. Until he stepped onto the gallows, she would not give up hope or stop fighting. After the sentencing, everything had happened very quickly, but Mr Cody said he would be reviewing the grounds for appeal. The case for the prosecution had been won by Harriet Kidd and the testimony of Doctor Reilly had been damning. The poor man appeared devastated when he left the court, unable to look Elizabeth in the eye. She could not blame him. He had spoken the truth under oath. What choice had he?

As these thoughts went through her mind, Elizabeth felt a new sense of purpose. There was work to be done. She would meet with Cody – haunt his chambers until he had explored every avenue for an appeal and prepared a case that would at least succeed in commutation of the sentence to manslaughter.

As the sun rose, she sprang out of bed, impatient and filled with new energy. She would go to Sydney and find a way to do her own research in the legal library at Sydney Law School. She would leave no stone unturned. What else could she do? There was still no word from Michael and she started to realise there never would be. It was three months since he'd gone. She refused to doubt his love for her, but she started to suspect an accident had befallen him. A bleak feeling of loss haunted her. She had held his love in her grasp and let it slip away. There was nothing she could do about it and rather than confront the prospect of a future without him, she threw all her energy, anger and disappointment into getting a retrial and reprieve for Kidd.

It was too early to call on Cody yet. The sun was barely up. She decided to take a leisurely bath before forcing down some breakfast. The little house where she and Will now lived lacked the scale and splendour of Kinross House, but, unlike Wilton's Creek, it boasted a rather temperamental water heater. She lay back in the bath, watching the steam rise as she soaped herself. She ran the washcloth over her body, then with a shock of realisation, sat bolt upright.

How could she have failed to notice? She'd been preoccupied with the trial. Her thoughts raced ahead, as she realised all the signs were there. Her stomach was slightly swollen. Since Kidd's arrest, she'd lost her appetite and her clothes had felt quite loose – but then the styles of the moment were loose around the middle anyway. She ran her hand over her breasts. Her nipples felt tender. It must be weeks since her last period. Grabbing a towel she scrambled out of the bath and dripped her way into the bedroom and to the small escritoire where she kept her diary.

'Rack your brains woman! When was the last time?' she asked herself.

She had not menstruated since some time before the children's deaths. She had failed to register the changes in her own body. Her heart skipped a beat at the prospect of another child. She could not wait to tell Kidd. He had looked so defeated in the brief moments she was allowed to share with him after his sentencing. He had barely spoken, just squeezed her hand as he stared into the middle distance. But now another new life coming would give him hope and the will to fight on. She was all the more determined that he would not die.

The meeting with Mr Cody did not go well. The barrister had taken the loss of the case to heart and his annoyance about being bested by the Crown seemed to bother him more than the fate of his client. He kept Elizabeth waiting for almost an hour before granting her a brief interview.

'Mrs Kidd, I regret that the trial did not go our way. The Crown started off making a very poor fist of it and I was hopeful that we had won the jury over. I am disappointed you failed to alert me to the potential for damaging testimony that your stepdaughter represented.'

'I had no idea myself. She had refused all contact with the family and indicated to a friend of the family that she would not testify on her father's behalf.'

'It's unfortunate she did not stick to that conviction, as she proved to be, even unwittingly, a hostile witness. Had I the opportunity to meet with her beforehand, we could have called her as a defence witness and tutored her in the importance of keeping her feelings about you to herself if she wished to avoid the eventuality of her father's conviction. Her accusations about you were a critical factor in turning the jury against your husband. Whilst her evidence was circumstantial, added to that of the doctor and our case was lost.'

'Can we appeal?'

'Yes. I can argue again that her testimony should have been ruled out as hearsay, but that of Doctor Reilly was damning in its own right.'

'What my husband said to the doctor was spoken in the heat of the moment. He was distraught. He was in shock. He thought Will might be mortally wounded. He would never have killed him had Nat not attacked William. It was a moment of fear and desperation to save William and me. Didn't you say there was a difference between the act and the intent?'

'Indeed, but the evidence from the doctor that your husband long harboured a wish to kill his son....'

'It was the heat of the moment. He was anxious for William and in shock at what happened. It wasn't a statement of intent.'

'Possibly.'

'If there is any possibility we must take it.'

'Then there's the matter of the shotgun. Your husband came to Wilton's Creek prepared.'

'For heaven's sake! He keeps a gun in the truck or the cart all the time. He spends half his time in the bush. If possession of a shotgun is evidence of intent to kill, they'd have to arrest most of the men in this town.'

Cody scowled. 'Is there anything else we might use?'

Elizabeth swallowed then spoke. 'Harriet Winterbourne uses drugs and is a heavy drinker.'

Cody raised an eyebrow. 'What kind of drugs?'

'Cocaine.'

'That could help discredit her as a witness. I'll have someone look into it and see what we can gather. Otherwise I intend to discuss the matter with my colleagues. It may be appropriate to assign someone else to conduct the appeal.'

'I thought you would do it?'

'I plan to pass the case to Mr Somerton, a promising young fellow, keen to cut his teeth on a challenging case.'

'Cut his teeth? Are you telling me he's some kind of trainee lawyer?'

'I would not use the word trainee, Mrs Kidd. Mr Somerton did extremely well in the bar examinations and is a competent and intelligent junior barrister. All of us at Bracket, Fincham & Cody have high expectations of him.'

'Mr Cody, I am expecting a child. My husband doesn't know yet, but I intend to tell him when I see him and make him understand that he has everything to live for and that you and your firm will stop at nothing to prove he is innocent of premeditated murder. Even if he has to serve a long prison sentence for manslaughter, I want him to know that at the end of it his child will be there beside me, waiting to welcome him home. Do you honestly expect me to tell him his barrister believes there's so little hope that he's going to assign a trainee to plead his case and he'll probably never live to see his child born, let alone have a chance of getting to know him or her? And what am I to tell my child? –
"You're the orphan of an executed murderer, whose own lawyer didn't believe his case was worth fighting for"?
'

Cody leaned back in his chair and raised his eyebrows at the tirade.

'First of all, Mrs Kidd, may I offer my congratulations for your forthcoming happiness.'

'My forthcoming happiness? How can I even think of happiness when my husband is condemned to die for saving the lives of his wife and son?'

'Very well. I will discuss this with my partners.'

'If it's about money?'

The lawyer's lip curled, as if money was a word too coarse to be uttered in these hallowed chambers.

'You've made your points well, Mrs Kidd. We will make the appeal and I will lead the case. Mr Somerton can assist me.'

'I intend to assist you myself too. Rest assured I will be studying every point of law in the book until I find a way to prove my husband has been wronged. I will be assiduous in sharing my findings with you.'

'Mrs Kidd, that will not be necessary.' Again the lip curled. 'We will as always, be rigorous in our endeavours.'

'We shall see.'

She rose and stretched her hand to him. 'Good day, Mr Cody.'

Will arrived home soon after she returned from the lawyer's chambers. He had been avoiding her since his outburst in the garden. During the court proceedings he'd sat apart, reluctant to talk. Elizabeth was puzzled at this out of character behaviour, but concluded he was distressed about his father.

He walked into the small drawing room, wearing his oilskin jacket and holding a woollen cap in his hands. He stood in front of the fireplace.

'Lizbeth, I'm going away.'

'What?' she tried to hide the rising panic in her voice.

'I'm going to sea.'

'What? Why? What about your father?'

'I can't do anything for him now. I can't stand to see him die when he did nothing wrong but save my life. It isn't fair.'

'We're going to help him, Will! You and I. I've just seen Mr Cody. There are grounds for appeal. We'll get the sentence commuted! He won't die, Will!'

'You and the lawyer can get him off. There's nothing I can do. I'm just a simple lad with no book learning. I've wasted enough of my life and I've made my mind up now. I'm going to go to sea. It's what I've always wanted. I have to get away from here. I want...' he hesitated.

'What, Will? What do you want?'

He stared down at his feet and she saw the blush rising up his neck to his cheeks.

'Tell me, Will.'

He raised his eyes to hers and spoke in what was little more than a whisper, 'I want to get away from you.'

'From me? I thought we were friends.'

The young man snorted. 'Oh yes, we're friends.'

'So what do you mean? I don't understand.'

'It's all we'll ever be.'

'I know I'm not your real mother, but I'm as fond of you as if you were my own son. And right now we've only got each other and I need you to help me get through this terrible time.'

'I don't want to be your son, damn it.'

'Will. Please!'

'Was Hat lying about you and Michael then? Tell me the truth.'

'Will...'

'You don't have to. I can see it in your face.'

'Will. You need to understand...'

'Understand? Yes I understand perfectly. I can't even blame you, Lizbeth. Pa's an old man. Michael would be much more your cup of tea. But I can't stand that you and he have both been lying to me. I trusted you both. He was my friend. And there you were sneaking behind my back and the old man's. Not to mention Hattie's.'

'It wasn't like that, Will. We never lied to you. Hattie had it all wrong. Michael and I did discover we had feelings for each other, and that's why he went away. I'm here for your father. And your father needs you too.'

'I love you, Lizbeth. There I've said it now. I can't keep it bottled up any longer. I know you don't think of me that way. And I can't bear to think of my old man having you. And if I stay here I'll just be wishing for him to be dead and I don't want to wish that 'cause he's my Pa and he saved my life and I don't want him to go to the gallows. But sometimes I can't stop myself from hating him. And if he does die I know now you'll never love me anyway because of Michael. So I've made my mind up. I'm going away. Maybe I'll come back one day and you'll see me differently. Maybe then you'll look at me as a man not as a young lad like you do now.'