A Life Plan Without You. (17 page)

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Authors: Christine Wood

Tags: #bullying, #longing, #first love, #lonliness, #ballroom dancing, #insecurities, #age differences, #80s disco era, #family fudes

BOOK: A Life Plan Without You.
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Wow she’s not to be messed with and she cares for Mum too, I
love my fighting spitfire more.

 

“Suppose it will have to be won’t it?” He turned and
disappeared up to his room. I turned to Sam.

“What time is it?” He was grinning like a like an
idiot.

“It’s half past eleven.”

“I'd better be making my way home, can you walk me please?” He
jumped to his feet.

“Sure baby, I’ll get your coat, gimmy a minute I need to err
change?” He pointed at his pants, laughed and went to his
room.

 

I ran the stairs to change pants, I opened my wardrobe and
stripped behind the door redressing and throwing the things in my
washing bag, now words with the idiot brother.

“Never do that again Jimmy ever or I will cut you off... Mum
was dead upset and it’s only thanks to Michelle keeping cool and
keeping her calm it stopped Mum having an episode, hurt me fine,
but not Mum and Michelle, I will kick your arse into next week if
you do it again.”

“Like you know Michelle at all, you’re using her and when you
have used her I will be there to pick up the pieces, she deserves
better than you, she deserves to be treated properly not used
abused and left alone when you have had enough of her, she’s sweet
and innocent, what do you want from her Sam, sex and nothing
more?”

“I don’t have to tell you what I want from Michelle, but I
will tell you this much, when and if she needs you after I leave
her, will be a long time coming, like never or when she is old and
grey, then when I’m gone fill your boot’s, but by then we will have
had a lifetime of memory’s. Yes I am never letting her go James,
ever get it in your head she’s mine.” He looked shocked I‘d as good
as told him we are getting married and will die old and grey and
happy, or he’s too thick to realise that’s what I meant? I smiled
and left him to think about it.

 

I heard a muffled yet heated conversation and he came back
after he had done a quick change. He smiled as he put my jacket on,
kissing my neck as he did umm, and then he slipped on his coat. He
looked down at me his eyes seemed to sparkle?

“You ok baby?” I kissed him.

“Perfect, thanks for asking.” We walked home, my arm around
his waist and his arm over my shoulder.

“Have you had a goodtime tonight?” He was playing with my
hair.

“Umm yes very, thank you. Did you really enjoy the things we
did Sam even not having sex, was that alright for you?” He rubbed
his other hand across, my cheek.

“Yes thanks and we will do more when we have had more than the
one date, we have time and we don’t have to rush, but you are going
to be worth waiting for, and I promise you baby the waiting will be
fantastic, I promise you.” He was grinning from ear to
ear.

“Oh yes you’re very good with your hands Sam, I wonder if the
other bits of you work as well?” He gave me the look, as his eye
brow rose ever so slightly, yes, I was a very happy and hornie
little bunny. We were turning onto my street. Shit mum was walking
that fleabag dog of hers and had spotted us.

 

She didn’t just say that, has my mild mannered girl has got a
wicked side too! Umm I do hope so. She is panicking as she sees the
woman walking her dog, with a silly pink bow in its hair, a
neighbour or someone she doesn’t want me to meet is approaching us.
She mutters shit my mum under her breath, she wasn’t expecting this
tonight, I see the panic in her eyes, relax just relax why is she
afraid of me meeting her Mum, is she ashamed of me?

 

“Who’s this Michelle?” Mum, what do I do? Sam held out his
hand and shook hers.

“I’m Sam and I’m very pleased to meet you Mrs Welles.” She
definitely didn’t expect this walking the dog tonight, and what’s
betting she puts the boot in or tries to?

“He’s my boyfriend Mum, Samuel Todd, and this Sam is my mother
Susan, he was insistent that he needed to walk me home to my door
Mother, his house is only ten minutes down by the river there, but
he insisted I had to get home in one piece. Is that ok with you?”
Sam was smiling like a fool because I’d introduced him as my
boyfriend.

 

She is her Mother, they look nothing alike though, but the dog
is lovingly circling her legs to be petted which she does, so I can
only presume she looks like her Dad? I lean forward and shake her
hand. I have to Michelle is a wreck is she the reason for her
insecurities? Her own Mother? Oh good I’m the boyfriend, not a
friend good job too baby,
she’s not ashamed
of me then, thank God for that! I smile as she grips me harder.
She’s afraid of her Mother but why… I hold her tighter so she knows
she is safe with me, so tightly, she gasps, I’d love to protect her
more. Her Mother is running her eye over me good job I changed
pants now…

 

“Suppose it will have to be, see you back at home Michelle. I
have to walk Tilly. It is nice meet you and we will see you soon
Sam. Thank you for walking her home, these streets aren’t safe
anymore. I will let your Dad know you’re seeing someone. He will
want to meet you tomorrow Sam at let’s say about one o’clock he
will be in, and waiting, he will insist on it. He’s very
traditional like that, he won’t have his Princess there running
about with just anyone, not that she has ever been interested in
boys, err men before? She’s quite the boring girl is our Michelle,
are you together, oh sorry, I didn’t think are you, are you only
friends as in boy whose just a friend?” Bitch was she being nasty
on purpose?

“Yes as in boyfriend, we’re going out and with each other, but
don’t book the church just yet, but you can look however at
dresses, because he’s a lot more than a friend and yes we’re very
serious, so serious that tomorrow he’s coming to church with
Grandma and me, I need the ‘others’ take on my new
fella.”

 

What rerun that last bit, I wasn’t aware I had popped the
question? I was leaving that a week or two first, damn that took
the wind from my sails, yes I want that I have fantasised about it
for months now, in my head we have been going out for months and
months already. I don’t think I like her mother very much, and I
don’t think they are close either, sheisk the last time I went to a
full church service was for Uncles funeral! Given my past
indiscretions, the bloody church roof may cave in, though he was
very understanding when I lit the candle...

 

“He won’t be stopping with you long then, if you spin him the
tall tales you tell me, dead people following you and speaking to
you really? Oh there’s another one Michelle, who’s that old witch
over your shoulder?” Bitch she told him, great he will do a runner
now.

 

Dead people not her too? She waltzes off with her tiny dog.
Good she gave as good as she got, and far wittier than her cow of a
mother why do that to your daughter Mrs Welles? I’m still smiling
at the church thing!
I give her a
reassuring kiss as she sighs. Her mother has a lot to answer
for…

 

“That would be your refection in the window mother, I swear
one day you will believe, and then you will have to apologise, to
me and to them.” She walked away laughing. “That was awkward. Sorry
Sam.” He was still bloody grinning like an idiot.

“No I’m fine are you? I’m sure church will be fine, I like
that we’re serious though, I like that a lot Michelle. Dead people,
seriously, not you too? Mum and Aunty go to see mediums and
spiritualists all the time, they like to believe there’s an
afterlife, they want to hear from their parents! So you see baby
see I’m not easy to shock. There’s loads of things in this world
that aren’t easily explained, and the afterlife is up on top of
Mum’s things she has to believe in. Perhaps, that’s why she likes
you and it certainly explained why she told me that I had to fetch
you home for her to see, she insisted on it actually.” He laughed,
thank you for not running away from me Sam. Emma, now she’s a
troubled lady.

“Oh, and sorry to disappoint you, but we’re not going to
church, it’s too early to introduce you to the hell and fury of
Grams church. It’s one of two we go to. Gram’s spiritualist church
is a blast it is so frigging cool and then there’s St Josephs,
that’s a bloody drag and as I’m a very good Catholic girl, I do two
visits to mass on Sunday.

Mum, well she just doesn’t like my Grams and Grams isn’t her
number one fan either. The dead people I see and hear, well is a
tale for another time. I don’t see them all the time, just when I
need them or they warn me of imminent danger or they need me to
pass on a reassuring word to a very grieving relative, and wow…
Really, no way…? They say they like you, because you’re not
dangerous, though they do say…” Shit, they say he is troubled, his
father is trouble and he will bring a great sadness and be trouble
for me, a message for me really? Sam looked worried...

“They say you’re a keeper and umm really? Oh angel you get
their seal of approval, though the magazine collection under your
bed you won’t need anymore?

No, the whole church thing, don’t worry please. I do it
because I like to wind her up, though I do go to church with her on
high days and special days. I am a much lapsed catholic girl, who
attends a Church of England secondary school. I’m so multi-faithed.
When she’s here I go to late mass and the spiritualist church when
they get another medium in, they like to test me and them.
Sometimes I play along sometimes I don’t. I’m such a good girl.” He
grabbed my hand.

“I only keep the magazines for the intellectual articles they
have in them, shit really they told you about them?”

“No you idiot all lads have them under their beds, though you
should get rid of them, you don’t need them any longer you have me,
though I used to be a very good girl until I met you.”

 

She looked worried for a second and looks to my side. Really
she is seeing someone now? I wonder what the tales for later are
too? Aunty and Mum had been to a meeting with their spiritualist
woman and she told them I would meet someone special weeks ago, I
smiled at the time, but hell I’m not knocking it now, because they
were right! I have quite a lot of magazines too, all acquired over
the past few weeks they have been my only release, phew. I take her
tiny hand in mine and kiss it…

 

“I never doubted for one little minute you were anything less
than a good girl. See, I got you home in one piece. You certainly
put him in his place, I liked the kick in the balls bit, but you
keep way from his balls though. You made sure Mum was fine and I
met your mother and the dog.” I shook my head.

“It isn’t a dog it’s a rat dawg, so what now then?”

“I kiss you and go back home and try to sleep. Then I will
call here for you tomorrow, at one o’clock I believe was the time
mentioned? When I have your father to meet. Then I owe you a visit
to the cinema, where I vaguely remember I was promised a make out
session, on the back row and I’m treating you to dinner.” He kissed
me, not a make out kiss because I think he was worried my mum would
be back and catch him.

“No, I’m a good girl I wouldn’t say that.”

“Oh, you’re a very good, bad girl.” He kissed me again slapped
my bum and I scooted into the house, I blew him a kiss he caught it
and walked off down the street.

 

I waved at her as she blew me a kiss, being a lovesick sap I
caught it and placed it in my pocket, shit how old am I? I head for
home…

 

“See you, tomorrow.” He waved and I went in, Dad was back. He
looked up.

“Had a nice time?” I nodded my head at him.

“Catch anything Dad?” He smiled.

“No Michelle, I just caught a cold.” I shrugged my shoulders
at him.

“Sorry Dad. Better luck next time?”

“It was a rough sea, so most of the others spent the whole
trip spewing, so we cut it short and I don’t think we’re doing it
again.” I laughed, because the coach was full with their booze,
added to the drink they took, their many stops in the pubs on the
way up! I think perhaps they were way too drunk to fish?

“Oh, perhaps it would have gone better not drinking all the
way up there and just drinking on the way home? I’m going to bed
Dad, see you in the morning, night Dad.” He laughed and agreed and
with that, I ran up the stairs changed into my pyjamas and got in
bed last thing I needed tonight was the third degree from Mum, who
will be spilling about Sam as soon as she gets in deep joy.
Tomorrow, I can’t bloody wait until tomorrow. I’ll pretend I’m
asleep, Becky already was. I didn’t need to pretend my head hit the
pillow and sleep I did.

 

 

CHAPTER
3

 

 

Sam is coming today, I didn’t care really because I’d have had
to tell Dad sooner or later and luckily, for me, today would be
that day. Up you get Michelle up and at ‘em. Today is the day for
my overprotective, bar brawling, meat head, soppy, very bad
gambler, cuddly, beer drinking, sometimes drunken, big hearted
Daddy to meet the much older, and a first for me, boyfriend! From
my description of my father he was a very confusing man. Not
really, he was two different people in one body, the hard man of
Stockton and my daddy, two very different people, but one in the
same when it came to me and Becks. Oh heck deep joy. I washed my
hair scrubbed my teeth and had a wash. Why had it taken so long for
nice hair? I decided on wearing my tight black jeans and tee shirt
and new fluffy cream jumper, and sod it I can’t delay any longer,
it’s off to face the music.

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