A Little Complicated (6 page)

“I know you want to be friends, but I’d love to get to know you again. Just us.”

“Ellie, that’s not a good idea. Lila needs stability and you don’t seem much different.”

“I could be…” She trailed off, I guess hoping I’d think on that.

“Ellie…”

“Do you have a thing for my brother?”

I swallowed audibly. “I—“

“Because I know you said you were bi and I know how you two are around each other. Even back then you never wanted to spend time just the two of us.”

“He was one of the best friends I ever had, Ellie.”

“You didn’t know him any longer than you knew me.”

“That’s not true. I met him a good month before you and you know it.”

She pouted.
“So you do have a thing for him?”

“That’s not what I’m saying, I just don’t think you and me becoming an item is smart.”

“Well, don’t shut off to the idea, completely, okay?” Like a dog with a bone this one, but it was one thing I’d always liked about her. She sure went after what she wanted. She just wasn’t Ryan and he didn’t seem to want anything to do with me. I couldn’t even contain the jealousy as I looked to the theater where I knew he was hanging out with some guy.

“Have a good afternoon, Ellie.
I really should get back to Lila.”

“Well, dinner sometime this week, cool?”

I sighed. “Yeah, Ellie. Cool.” I got in my truck and sat for a second as I watched her dial someone on her phone and back out of her parking spot in her bright red Volkswagen Beatle. I leaned my head back against the head rest. I should just cut my fucking losses. These Borja siblings were gonna be the death of me and I wasn’t going to lead one of them on just to be around the other.

I sat up to shift my truck i
nto gear but noticed Ryan walking from the theater to his car. I watched as he got into his car and fumbled with the keys then threw them down, annoyed. It was cute, really, the way he got frustrated. I got out of my truck, unable to stop myself, and knocked on his window. He didn’t seem pleased to see me but I smiled at him. I was definitely happy to see him.

“Hey,” he said as his window rolled down.

“Still too drunk to drive?”

“Yeah, my friend had to leave in the middle of the movie. I told him I’d be fine by the time it was over but I’m obviously not so I’m just gonna sleep it off here for a few.”

The only part I caught was the part where his date had gotten cut short. “Is that a good idea? I can just give you a lift home. We
do
live in the same building.”

“
That
’s not a good idea.”

I rolled my eyes, knowing I probably looked like Lila in that moment. “Don’t be an idiot. Just come on
. I’ll take you home and you can sleep it off, then we’ll come back for your car later tonight.” It was early yet so I really was being logical.

He debate
d it for a minute. “Okay. Only ‘cause I don’t wanna sleep in this parking lot.” He rolled up his window, locked up his car and got in my truck. We were relatively quiet on the way back to the apartments. When we pulled up I had to help him pour himself out the door.

“I’ll
take the elevator up with you.”

“Not necessary,” he said petulantly. I patted his head indulgently.

“You walked Lila home. This is the least I can do.”

We walked in silence
, me following him closely. “When did she start going by Lila?” he asked as we got on the elevator. I was a bit thrown by the random question. I’d forgotten she was still just my little Delilah when Ryan and I were friends.

“When she was ten years old, she figured out she had her grandmother’s name and she wanted to be her ‘own person.’”

“Oh, she has that down pat if I remember your mother.” I smiled. Yeah, my mother was short, plump and merry. She’d always been an awesome mother, sweet and kind, but Lila was much feistier. She had a fire in her that was much edgier than my mother. I don’t know how she’d turned out that way. I’d always been the silent type. Lila, she was rowdy and spoke her mind.

“Yeah, she’s a spitfire, my Lila.”

“You’ve done a good job. She’s a great kid. I remember how impressed I was that she was so strong and just fucking happy to be alive, even in that wheel chair.”

As I thought over his words, I smiled. She was definitely strong. She’d taken everything in stride. She was an active kid before her accident but she never let it slow her down. “When we announced she’d need a wheelchair she’d immediately said she was just gonna have to start racing if she was gonna be on wheels.”

Ryan laughed. “Sounds like the girl I’ve met, though it doesn’t surprise me. She was like that even when she was little. Remember when we’d take her to the Play Place in McDonald’s and she always had to be the fastest on the slide and the best at diving in the balls.”

I laughed. It always worried me sick when she got crazy around all those other kids but Ryan had
once just put a hand on my knee and told me just to let her be a kid. “You reminded me to let her be. You helped me a lot through the years and you didn’t even know it,” I admitted. He smiled to himself.

“You, too, honestly. I remembered you telling me I just had to forget all th
e things people called me in high school. All the social anxiety kinda went away eventually. Lost the glasses and the stupid faux hawk.” Ryan’s smile went cocky. “Got out there and got laid.”

“I’m thrilled for you.” My tone betrayed that I was anything but thrilled. He laughed at me.

The elevator opened on his floor and I walked him to his door where he fumbled with the keys. “Give me those.” I snatched them and unlocked the door.

He mumbled his thanks as he pushed past me into the apartment. When he flicked a light on I saw the pull-out couch was still unmade and covered in Ellie’s clothes. Otherwise
, the apartment was very neat. He had a badass entertainment system on one wall and a huge computer setup on another. His kitchen was similar to mine but it looked like someone actually used it. Lila and I were more partial to takeout since we could afford more than mac’n’cheese and frozen pizzas now.

“Ellie still leaves a mess everywhere she goes, huh?”

He shook his head when he looked at her pile of
clothes. “Her brain still doesn’t make time for much other than boys. I’m surprised she’s so good at her job.”

I harrumphed. “I’m surprised she keeps her head on straight most days.”

He looked at me funny. “I guess she doesn’t always. She’s been known to chase a girl or two.”

I was so surprised by the joke that I laughed. It was nice to see some of his walls down. I hated it was just because he was drunk. That made me real sad, actually. “Well, I guess I should let you get some sleep,” I said.

“Yeah.”

“I’ll come wake you before it’s too late so you won’t be up all night.”

He looked at me surprised. “You remembered.”

“Well, I didn’t figure you’d changed that much.”

He scowled. “More than you’d think.” Dammit, he was mad at me again. I moved toward him and, before he could pull back, grabbed one of those sexy biceps.

“Can you stop being pissed
at me?”

“Can you stop dating my sister before I get a chance to tell you I have feelings for you?” His eyes grew wide when I smiled at what he said. “Shit!”

“Oh, no. I won’t let you take that back, mister. Drunk words, sober thoughts and all that.”

He tried to pull away but I held firm. “It was always you, Ryan.” I said, moving right up in his face.
His eyes studied my face and before he could second guess himself I moved in for a kiss.

It was better than I remembered. Yeah, he tasted like vodka and theater popcorn but under that was that taste that was just Ryan
fuckin’ Borja. He was hesitant at first and I couldn’t help but think this was so much like the situation that happened with me on that last night.

His kisses
were much less hesitant, though. He was sure of himself when he finally gave in. And fuck could he use that mouth. All the longing he poured into that kiss turned me inside out. I tried to give as good as I got, but my brain was turning to mush and goddamn was that kiss better than I remembered. Or maybe this is the kind of kiss that comes with experience.
Ugh.
I couldn’t let myself even think that way because the horrible monster that is jealousy started clawing at my chest.

The
tightening feeling in my chest had me carding my fingers through his hair, pulling gently, but firm enough to take total control of the kiss. I ate his mouth, trying to show him just how much I had missed him, needed him the last few years.

The magic ended too soon. When our hips met, cocks grinding through our pants
just as they had all those years ago, it sent electric shocks through my body. He groaned his pleasure which was just enough to separate the kiss. As if someone tossed a bucket of cold water on us, his eyes popped open and it seemed to dawn on him what we were doing. He shoved me back and my whole body cried out from the loss.

“Get out!” he hollered. I flinched and couldn’t stop the disappointment from showing on my face.

“Oh, no you don’t. You don’t get to look at me like that. You’re dating my
sister
!” He started shoving me toward the door.

“But Ryan…”

“Don’t but Ryan me, dude. Dating,
dated.
What. Ever. This is not happening.” With a final shove and an angry glare, he slammed the door in my face.

Fuck!
The cruelest joke the cosmos kept playing on me was Ryan fucking Borja. Hot then cold, his sister stomping all over the place wreaking havoc. All I could think was that I wished he’d fucking just said “Don’t go” that night I’d asked him whether he wanted me to cancel on his sister or not. In hindsight, I understood his reasoning. I’d never officially come out to him as being bisexual, but I couldn’t fathom now why he kept doing this. I’d never slept with his sister. I’d never been serious about her and vice versa. We weren’t serious now, hell we weren’t even dating. Unless she’d told him that first night we hung out was a date, which I’d been very clear to both Borjas was
not
a date.

So my only hope here was Ell
ie clearing this up and somehow I didn’t see that being an option. Hell, she’d probably be pissed that I was trying to get with her brother. But I’d met him first. I’d wanted him first. I’d always wanted him
more
. It’s like I’d found out she was his sister and automatically put her in the friend zone all those years ago and now it just kept biting me in the ass.

I squared my shoulders and kicked the
carpeting outside Ryan’s door. Damn them both. I’d made it eight years without them. This was obviously not meant to be, and there was no way I was settling for second best in Ellie.

It was time to move on. This was closure if there ever was any.

CHAPTER NINE
Ryan

“So you just pushed him out?” Tarsha stared at me after I’d recounted the events of that night. I’d called her to take me to get my car. “And he’s supposed to be the one bringing you for your car?”

“Yeah. I woke myself early so I could just get my car and be done with the whole thing.”

“Boy, you’re crazy.” She shook her head as she pulled her car into the parking lot of Lucky Star.

“I’m just ready for all of this to be behind me. I did fine without Brady all these years.”

“I tell you, you boys are dumb. Just dumb.”

I laughed at the look she gave me. “Why’s it gotta be like that?”

“You’re obviously digging this boy, want in his pants. I don’t know why you’re playing hard to get. Not like you’ve been Mr. Popular with the boys.”

“Hey!” I punched her in the arm, giving her my most wounded look. “It’s obviously a little complicated, seeing as he’s dating my sister.”

“I thought they both made it pretty clear they weren’t.”

“Well, he
used
to date my sister.”

“Didn’t stop you back then.”

I huffed an annoyed breath. “I’m done with this conversation,” I said as I went for the door handle. She placed her hand on my arm, bringing me up short.

“Have you ever thought of letting him or your sister explain how it’s going down?
I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again: this would be best handled by just talking to them. I know it seems messy as hell right now, but maybe it’s simpler than you think.”

I thought about it and the hope in my chest that rose whenever Brady Novak was involved started overwhelming me. A smile almost broke free but I shut that down with a quickness, shaking my head.

“Even if they aren’t dating, it’s like I said, they used to date. Chances are they slept together and I just don’t do sloppy seconds with my sister. That’s gross.”

“Grow up.”

“Look, just because you dated that guy that was with Memory doesn’t mean I want to go after every guy my sister throws away,” I snapped. I knew that wasn’t fair. Her sister Memory had technically started seeing Tarsha’s ex-boyfriend a few years after Tarsha and the guy broke up. Years later, Tarsha rekindled with the man and they now had two children so it had worked out fine for them.