A Man of His Word (20 page)

Suddenly Moriah turned, meeting his gaze, as if she knew he was looking straight at her.

His heart soared at the calm he saw in her eyes, a serenity he hadn’t seen since before Levi had left. He had wanted her to stay in the large house, not only out of guilt for what his brother had done to her, but also because he wanted her near. She was so fragile, so vulnerable, and with good reason. His brother had been right about one thing—Gabe wanted to look after her. But she had insisted on moving back home, and he could see now that it was the right decision.

The hymns continued, one after the other, but Gabe did little singing. He surreptitiously kept his gaze on Moriah throughout the first hour of the three-hour service, unable to keep from looking at her, wishing she would acknowledge him, but also hoping she wouldn’t. She seemed completely involved in the singing, and other than that one time at the beginning of the service, she kept her attention focused on the bishop.

After the singing ended, Abel stood and began his sermon. The words passed through Gabe’s ears, his mind not registering anything but the plights of his brother, Moriah, and his
daed
weighing heavily on his soul. He vowed to keep close watch on his father, and considered hiring another part-time employee, at least until
Daed
had a chance to recover from Levi’s departure. He couldn’t risk anything happening to his
daed
. Not when he’d already lost his brother. He couldn’t lose the only immediate family he had left.

When the service finally reached its conclusion, the congregation rose to sing another hymn. After the dismissal, he turned to look for Moriah, but she was already headed to the Eshes’ house, probably intending to assist with lunch preparations. He wouldn’t have blamed her if she hadn’t stayed, but he wasn’t surprised that she would offer to help. Throughout this ordeal, she had continually surprised him with her inner strength.

He suddenly heard the hushed tones of his father and Joseph Byler behind him. Turning, he saw his
daed
speaking to Joseph and the bishop. Gabe could see his father’s eyes were glistening with tears. “
Danki
for listening to me, Joseph. I ask you to forgive my son. I beg you to forgive my Levi for what he has done to your daughter and your family.”

Gabe quickly went to his father’s side. “
Daed
,” he said in a low voice.

Joseph stilled them both by putting his hand on John’s shoulder. “Don’t take your son’s burden on yourself.”

“But I have already. Can’t you see? His burden is mine. It always will be.”

Gabe looked at Joseph, who remained silent for a moment. Finally, he dropped his hand from John and spoke. “We’ll pray for Levi to realize his folly and return. When he does, we will welcome him home.”

“
Danki
, Joseph,” John said quietly. He stared at the ground as Joseph turned and walked away.

The bishop drew Gabe to the side. “Your
daed
is in a bad way, Gabriel.”

With a nod Gabe said, “He’s taking this hard.”

“Of course he is. None of us blame him for that. But perhaps it would be best if you took him home. The ministers and I will come by this afternoon and see how he’s doing.” Abel looked squarely at Gabe. “How both of you are doing.”

Giving his father a quick glance, Gabe suddenly felt as tired as his
daed
looked. He didn’t want to be here, fighting to keep his composure while worrying about John. “
Ya
. I will take him home.”

Fortunately, John readily agreed to leave the Eshes’. “Not much in the mood for socializing,” he said wearily.

“Me either.” They walked to their buggy. Before John got in, he looked at Gabe. “Will we ever see him again, Gabriel? Will I ever see my son again?”

More than anything Gabe wanted to tell his father that Levi would return, that everything would be back the way it was. But he couldn’t because nothing would be the same for any of them again. Yet he refused to take away his
daed
’s hope. The old man needed something to cling to, even if it was a lie. “I don’t know,” he finally managed. “I don’t know.”

Moriah watched John and Gabriel as they headed for their buggy.
Poor, poor John
. Her heart went out to her father-in-law. Yesterday as they’d prayed together, his strength and faith had given her hope. But today the man was obviously consumed with grief over what Levi had done. And there was Gabriel, right by his side, offering his support. He had not only been Moriah’s rock that first night, but he continued to be his father’s as well.

She turned around and started to go inside to help with lunch. But something stopped her, causing her to look at her father-in-law and brother-in-law again. While everyone was gathering for the afternoon meal, John and Gabriel were alone. And despite what Levi had done, she was still part of their family. Even though she was suffering with her own pain, she didn’t want to leave them alone. She had to find a way to help somehow.

She went inside and found her mother with the other women in the kitchen. Making her way over to her mother, she whispered her intentions in Emma’s ear.
Mami
looked surprised, but she nodded, then went to find the bishop’s wife.

Moriah hurried back outside just in time to see Gabriel step up to get inside the buggy. She called out his name and rushed toward him.

He stopped and looked at her, his visage grim.

“Is he all right?” she asked.

“I have no idea.” He lowered his voice, adding, “He’s taking this very hard.”

“I know.”

“Gabriel?” John called to his son.

Both Gabriel and Moriah peeked inside the buggy. When John’s gaze met hers, he smiled. “Such a sweet
maedel
,” he said. “You didn’t deserve this. I’m so sorry for what Levi has done.”

“We should be going,” Gabriel said as he climbed inside. He seemed to be in a hurry, but then he paused. “Will you be all right?”

Moriah nodded, but wondered if she’d ever be all right again.

Seemingly satisfied with her response, Gabriel touched the reins to the flanks of the horse and pulled out of the Eshes’ drive.

Moriah watched as they left, her heart not only bleeding for herself but also for Gabriel and John.

Gabe and John rode home in silence. Once they reached the house, he helped his father into the bedroom he had shared with his wife for over forty years. The modest space still held reminders of their mother—a quilt she had made as a child draped over the back of the rocking chair she had used to rock Gabe and Levi to sleep. An old Bible passed down through her family lay on the nightstand next to the bed, on the side where she used to sleep.

A nearly unbearable sense of sadness engulfed him. He’d never missed his mother more than now. He had grieved deeply for her after she died, but Levi had been there to share that grief. Both of them had been close to her, Levi even more so.

She would have known what to do about
Daed
. Gabe had no idea how to handle his father’s pain. Even after his wife had died, John Miller had been strong. Now, with Gabe’s arm supporting him, guiding him to his bed, he was a broken man.

“
Daed
, why don’t you lay down for a little while? I’ll bring you some lunch in a bit.”

John sat down on the edge of the bed, but he shook his head. “I’m not hungry.” He looked up at Gabe. “I was right in asking Joseph for forgiveness.”

“That’s what Levi needs to do.”

“He can’t. Not now.”

“You mean he won’t.”

Squaring his shoulders as if he had a sudden burst of strength, John said, “I know what I mean,
sohn
. Levi is lost. He’s strayed away from God. I don’t know what led him down this path, but I do know that he has to seek out the Lord and ask His forgiveness. Only when he’s given himself fully to God will he be able to come back.” He bent over and took off his boots, then stretched out on the bed, closing his eyes. “You’re right. I am tired.”

“I’ll leave you alone.” Gabe turned to go. “Come downstairs when you’re ready.” He slowly shut the door behind him and made his way to the first floor of the house. As soon as his foot landed on the bottom stair, he heard a knock on the front door. He opened it and saw Moriah standing on the porch. His eyes widened with surprise. “What are you doing here?”

“We brought you lunch.”

Gabe looked beyond her and saw
Frau
Byler coming up the porch steps, carrying a large picnic basket. Joseph was tending to their horse. He looked back at Moriah, who gave him a small smile that warmed his heart.

“We thought you and John might be hungry.”

“Come on in.” He opened the door wide and gestured for the two women to step inside. He then went out to help Joseph with his horse and buggy. When the men returned, they were welcomed by a feast of sliced ham, bread, pickles, potato salad, rolls, banana bread, and two different kinds of cookies. Gabe was thankful for the bounty, and for the generosity of the Bylers.

“
Daed
’s upstairs,” Gabe stated as he went to the sink and washed his hands. “He said he wasn’t hungry, but I know he’d want to be down here to thank you for bringing such a
wunderbaar
meal.”

“Don’t worry about bothering him,” Emma said as she filled their glasses with iced tea. “He should rest. We have plenty and this will all keep ’til later.

They took their chairs, and Gabe sat across from Moriah. After prayer they started to eat, but it became evident that no one had much of an appetite. Moriah just picked at her food, and her mother soon noticed.

“You have to eat, Moriah,” she said, her voice soft and gentle. “Even when you aren’t hungry, your baby is.”

Nodding, Moriah ate a spoonful of potato salad. A long, awkward stretch of silence soon followed. Gabe’s attention kept swaying to her. He wished there was something he could do to fix the situation. But he couldn’t do anything. And he hated that helpless feeling most of all.

As they made their way home from church, Rachel and her mother rode in silence. Sarah stared straight ahead as she guided the horse and buggy down the road. Her black bonnet obscured her face, keeping Rachel from discerning her thoughts, although she suspected she already knew what Sarah was thinking about. She was thinking about it too.

The entire community had been abuzz this morning at church. Soon everyone knew that Levi Miller had left his wife and the Amish. Rachel could barely believe it. She didn’t know Levi well, but she had thought he and Moriah had a good marriage. They were still newlyweds—how could there be trouble in the relationship already? Yet having marriage problems was one thing. Leaving the church was an entirely different story.