A Man's Appetite (12 page)

“I thought it was you. Wow. I didn’t expect to see you.”

              “Same here.”

“And, you’re still beautiful as always.”

              “Thank you. And, you don’t look too bad yourself.”

Kevin wasn’t in his business attire as he would normally be. Today, he wore an all-white, polo shirt and tan slacks. Marla assumed he was off of work. Although they hadn’t seen one another in quite some time, the conversation was kept very short. Kevin mainly wanted to know how Marla was doing, while Marla wanted to quickly end the conversation. With her back towards the shopping window, she was unaware that Stanley and the brunette had left the pizza stand. Kevin showed concern, but Marla would only respond with one-word answers. After several yes and no’s, Kevin took the hint and walked away. Even with things being shaky at home, Marla was not about to make things worse.

Once Marla remembered why she was standing in the store, she turned around only to see that the two were gone. She felt disappointed, but also felt that she had saw enough. Always being protective of her baby sister, Marla believed she had to do something. The only problem was how. She didn’t want Diane to continue in an unhealthy relationship, but there was also the concern of breaking Diane’s heart with the bad news. Knowing that Diane is very emotional, Marla was unsure of which route to take. She even considered approaching Stanley and confronting him. 

On her way back to the job, she tried to come up with ways of addressing Stanley’s infidelity:

“Like any man, Stanley would deny it to his grave. Simply providing details of location, time, and what actually took place isn’t enough. I’ll have to present actual proof. Maybe take a picture with my cell phone, because this cannot continue on. Diane is a great woman and she does all she can, as a housewife to provide for Stanley and their family. I have to continue on this. I will put a stop to it.”

Since it was Friday, Marla decided to put her investigation on hold until Monday. There was little chance that Stanley would try to spend time with his mistress over the weekend, with his wife at home. She decided to set aside the weekend for her family. The recent decisions she made had created too much damage, so it was up to her to “right her wrong”.

# # #

Stanley made it home from work and went straight for Diane. He approached Diane, as she sat on the couch and gave her a kiss on the lips. He made it a point to always show Diane attention. Regardless if it was a long day from work or just family time during the weekend, Stanley would always give Diane his full attention. And after years of being together, Diane came to expect it. It was routine. If Stanley were to enter the house and drop onto the couch, Diane would think something was wrong. By constantly providing a kiss or asking Diane how was her day, he had nothing to worry about. As Stanley stepped back and began to undo his tie, Diane noticed something unusual. Stanley noticed the odd look, but wasn’t sure what it was for. Instead of questioning Diane, he did a mental examination of himself to make sure everything was in place. After a minute or so, Diane finally questioned Stanley.

“Did you waste something on yourself?”

              “Where”, asked Stanley.

Diane stood up from the couch and pointed at a small spot on his shirt that was near the tie. “It looks like tomato sauce”, she said. Stanley looked where Diane was pointing and noticed the small stain on his shirt.

              “Oh, yeah. I had a few breadsticks, today. I guess I was a little too messy”

“Awww. My baby needs a bib.”

They both laughed at Diane’s solution to the stain on Stanley’s shirt. Once Stanley discovered he had a stain on his shirt, he unbuttoned his dress shirt as well. Afterwards, Diane held on to the shirt and made plans to drop it off at the cleaners by Monday. Stanley didn’t really have an appetite, once he got settled in at home. So instead of having dinner after work, he sat with Diane and the children and watched TV.

# # #

Marla made it an effort to make it home on time, after work. Her only stop was the grocery store to find something to cook. She was determined to restore happiness and peace in the household. She made sure to gather all the foods that Michael liked from the grocery store. When she finally made it home and entered the front door, Michael was sitting on the couch and reading a newspaper.

“Hey”, said Marla, as she closed the door.

              “Hey.”

Michael didn’t bother to move the newspaper to look at Marla. He was busy looking through the paper and decided to glance through the obituary section. It was a habit that he picked up from his mother. The name, Jimmy caught his attention. It was a brief, two sentence announcement of his death. When he saw the age, 39, he knew that his next door neighbor was close to that age. But, he couldn’t remember Jimmy’s last name. “Marla, what is Jimmy’s last name, next door?” For a moment, Marla didn’t bother to respond. She put two and two together and knew that Michael must have saw his name in the paper.

              “Marla?”

“Yes, Michael?”

              “Do you know Jimmy and Rhonda’s last name?”

“Why?”

              “This guy in the death section is close to Jimmy’s age.”

“Oh.”

              “Now that I think about it, I haven’t seen his vehicle in a while.”

The thought of Jimmy brought tears to Marla’s eyes. She hung her head over the kitchen counter, trying to hold herself together. After a moment of silence, Michael called for Marla again. She was unable to respond, as her voice became weak. Confused, Michael got up from the couch and went into the kitchen to check on Marla. When he entered, she was in the same position with tears clashing onto the counter.

              “What’s wrong Marla?”

“He didn’t deserve this”, said Marla as her voice trembled.

Marla turned towards Michael, wanting to be held. Michael was unsure of what Marla was trying to say, so he kept his arms around her until she was able to gather herself. Marla looked up at Michael and confirmed Jimmy’s death. She explained how she had found out last night, but was unable to tell him why. Michael didn’t even know that Jimmy had been in an accident. When he asked Marla why she didn’t tell him about the accident, her excuse was that she was dealing with a lot of other things. The food that Marla purchased to cook was left on the counter, as Michael helped her into the living room to sit and gather herself. The rest of the night, Marla and Michael sat and talked. They managed to cover a lot of ground and soothe things over. Marla refrained from telling Michael what was the cause of Jimmy’s accident and death. She was too ashamed of what she had done. She was more concerned with Rhonda’s well-being, as was Michael. This had been one of the longest Fridays that Marla had ever had. She truly just wanted some rest and time to get things together. She still had to face Rhonda, as well as confront Stanley and his lies. Michael decided to put the groceries away for Marla. Once he found out that Marla was planning to cook his favorite dishes, he was appreciative of the thought but no longer had an appetite. Realizing he would never see his good spirited neighbor again was a tough pill to swallow. His heart was heavy and food was the last thing on his mind.

Saturday morning wasn’t the same at Marla’s home. Normally, Saturday meant the family had two free days to relax and enjoy one another. But, this Saturday was more of a task than a day at work could ever be. She knew she would have to find a way to visit Rhonda. Although Rhonda lived next door, it was a part of the world that Marla didn’t want to believe existed. In her mind, she was a murderer. In the past, she had almost destroyed her own marriage. But now, she found a way to destroy someone else’s marriage, permanently! Marla laid in the bed, as her eyes wondered the room. She would stare at various things throughout the bedroom for long periods of time and try to clear her mind. Not only did she want the thoughts to go away, but she wanted to rest. All last night, she was unable to sleep. She would briefly sleep for an hour or less and then wake up all over again. It was the eighth or ninth time that she had awaken. After so many times, she had lost count. Although Michael was in deep sorrow, he managed to go to sleep. His pain was very different. While he struggled with the loss of a good friend, Marla was forced with the loss of a friend and making herself responsible for it.

Later on….

Michael stood at Rhonda’s door and took two knocks. As he stood patiently, there was no answer at the door. He prepared to knock again. After the first knock, the door opened and Rhonda stood on the other end. “Hey”, said Michael unsure of what to say. Rhonda stood emotionless and gazed into Michael’s eyes. In the corner of her eye, she could see Marla standing off to the side, behind Michael. Although Marla had got up the nerve to go with Michael to check on Rhonda, deep down she wasn’t ready. Marla’s stomach was in a knot, while all she could do was watch. She never said a word, just as Rhonda. For Rhonda, seeing Michael made her think of Jimmy. She reached for Michael and wrapped her arms around his neck, as she cried. At that moment, she needed the comfort of a man. She was too weak from all the worry and disbelief of her husband being dead. Michael didn’t know how to respond to another person’s pain, so he just held onto Rhonda and allowed her time to weep. Marla remained in the same position and never moved a muscle. As her stomach continued to tighten, Marla partially blacked out for a moment. She was finally facing the day that she tried to mentally erase for the past two days.

After a few minutes, Michael remembered that Marla had walked over to Rhonda’s house with him. He turned his head to see why she hadn’t approached Rhonda and provide some support. As he looked, he could tell that Marla was off in her own world. After calling her name a few times, Marla realized Michael was calling for her and responded. Michael wanted to take Rhonda into her living room, where she could have a seat. He asked Marla to help and she became mentally strong enough to accept the challenge. Briefly, they both managed to block out their surroundings. Focusing on photos and other personal items would be too much for either one of them, so they chose to ignore everything to be strong for Rhonda. The entire experience was surreal. Marla tried to provide strength for Rhonda, but her pain was almost equal to Rhonda’s. For the moment, Michael did majority of the communicating. Eventually, Rhonda came around and began to respond to Michael. It was Marla that continued to struggle. In her mind, she was a murderer.

# # #

Reggie was at the barbershop, cutting one of his regular customer’s head. There were two other men, waiting to have their hair cut by Reggie also. Like most barbers, Saturday was the busiest day for Reggie. He headed to the barbershop as soon as he woke up. Normally, he gets a good mixture of regular clients and visitors. It had been a while, since Reggie heard from Angie. Every so often, he would check his phone for any missed calls or messages. Reggie maintained his professional barbering, but he didn’t communicate as much. Normally, he would hold conversations with 2 or more people at the same time. He would talk with his clients, the clients of other barbers, and the barbers themselves. Angie entered his life at an awkward time. This caused Reggie to become attached to Angie. Throughout the morning, he was tempted to send a message to Angie. The main reason he didn’t send a message is because he was too busy cutting hair all morning. The stale, white motel stayed on his mind.

The relationship between Reggie and Stephanie was starting to get better, but it had no effect on how he felt about Angie. For Reggie, Angie was filling a void that Stephanie had left. During the crazy situation involving the note, love was distant. Since he knew nothing of the note that was discovered, the sudden change was a tough blow. He assumed Stephanie had a change of heart and decided to go elsewhere. Being that he still knew nothing about the note, everything with Stephanie was questionable in his eyes. He felt he could only deal with her with strings attached. He had to have a backup plan for whatever may come about. And, Angie was his backup plan. Reggie was considering Angie as his priority. While fulfilling his needs, the relationship with Angie brought forth some excitement for Reggie. Meeting at a secret location, so that no one would know was risky and it intensified the sexual aspect of their relationship. But now, everything had come to a halt. Reggie was starting to believe that it was just his luck with women. Instead of ruining his Saturday, he put that situation on the shelf and focused on his profession, barbering.

# # #

Stephanie spent the morning preparing food. She hadn’t had a chance to talk with Reggie about moving forward with their marriage plans and felt she had to do it today. In order to prepare for the conversation, Stephanie decided to clean up the house and cook for her man. She believed what people said about food being a way to a man’s heart. In her mind, it was time to take the next step. Even if it meant going to a local courthouse, Stephanie was ready. Just being able to say “I do” was a huge accomplishment. In some ways, it would seem as if Stephanie held more value in obtaining a ring and having a celebration than the actual relationship. She was comfortable in her career and now, she was ready to start her family. The thought of having a new last name and being completely taken off the market was invigorating. It was definitely at the top of her lifetime goals. The entire day, Stephanie was on cloud nine. She hadn’t had a Saturday like this in a long time. Although no decisions were final, she knew that things were only going to get better. She expected a healthy and enjoyable conversation with her “soon to be” husband and prepared for such.

After getting her food together, Stephanie decided to leave for a while and do a little shopping for herself. She was already having a good day, so why not make it better? As she left, in route to the mall, she made a mental note to pick up a bottle of wine to go along with the meal. She even made plans to stop at some of the jewelry stores within the mall. She wanted to look at some of the rings on display, even though she planned to have her wedding ring custom made. Stephanie believed that every Saturday should feel like this. With her favorite radio station playing and the sun covering the entire city, there was no place she would rather be. Stephanie had no plans of starting over. Her only focus was to move forward and build upon what was already established. Today was going to be the start of a lifetime commitment.

# # #

Being by Rhonda’s side, during her time of bereavement was a life-changing experience for Marla and Michael. Both were able to see how a spouse you love is irreplaceable. At that very moment, there was nothing else that mattered to either one of them. Michael had quickly thrown out of the window any thoughts about Marla and the note. He managed to place himself in Rhonda’s position. “What if the last time I spoke to Marla was an argument”, he asked himself. “Not a hug, not a kiss, not a smile, but an argument over something as petty as a piece of paper. How could I live with that?” Unknowing to Michael, it was the exact experience Rhonda had with Jimmy. All because of that note, Rhonda’s feelings were bitter towards Jimmy and that is how the relationship ended. Although Jimmy remained alive for a while, in the hospital, there was no time to makeup, hug, kiss, and express true feelings towards one another. This is one issue that continued to haunt Rhonda. She felt that she was the cause of his death and she would never have the opportunity to truly apologize to Jimmy, face-to-face.

On the other hand, Marla had to find a way to forgive herself. She had already made plans to get things right with Michael, so that wasn’t a huge problem. What weighed on her now was trying to convince herself that Jimmy’s death was not her fault. Marla was working hard to quiet her thoughts, as they continued to race. “It was never my intentions”, she said to herself. “I didn’t purposely do all of this to hurt anyone. I actually believed I was helping someone. I didn’t want any of my family or friends to be emotionally destroyed. Death was never an option. But, I have to stop this. I can’t destroy myself. I have a family at home. I have Michael and Junior.”

Suddenly, thinking about Junior lighten Marla’s mental load. Junior was one of the pieces to her life that kept her focused and sane. She would quickly remind herself that life was about Junior, not her. All of her problems, mistakes, and misunderstandings held no value over Junior. As she sat in Rhonda’s living room, she watched Michael console Rhonda. She could see Junior in Michael. In some ways, she managed to obtain a little peace. Jimmy’s death wasn’t completely removed from the picture, but it was no longer hindering Marla. Marla stood up from the chair directly across from where Michael and Rhonda were sitting, walked over to Rhonda and had a seat next to her. Feeling Marla place her arms around her, caused Rhonda to cry even more. Only this time, some of those tears were tears of joy. Rhonda was thankful to have neighbors like Michael and Marla. She felt that she didn’t have to fight the battle alone. Marla started to shed more tears, but she remained strong for Rhonda.

Later….

Michael and Marla decided to leave for a while and return to their home. They promised Rhonda that they would be back with food and drinks. They felt it was the least they could do to help Rhonda out, during her time of sorrow. As they walked back to their home, they were side-by-side and Michael kept his hand around Marla’s waist. There wasn’t a lot of communication between them. Their experience with Rhonda left them speechless. Since the weather was nice, Michael decided to prepare his delicious barbeque for Rhonda and Marla could add some side dishes. When they approached the front door, Marla stopped.

“What’s wrong”, asked Michael.

              “I have to call Diane.”

“Okay.”

Michael walked inside, as Marla took a seat on the concrete step that led to their front door. She pulled out her cell phone and called Diane.

“Hey, Diane. Are you busy?”

              “Not really. What’s up?”

“Well, me and Michael were planning to prepare something for Rhonda and I was calling to invite you and the family. I think the company might help.”

              “Okay. I’ll have to see what Stanley has planned. He’s been gone all morning.”

“Really? Well, let me know. Hopefully, you can come by, because I need to ask you something.”

              “Okay. You don’t want to ask now?”

“Not right now. I’ll discuss it later.”

              “Okay.”

Hearing that Stanley was away all morning reminded Marla to speak with Diane about what she had saw between Stanley and the brunette.  For Stanley to be away all morning, on a Saturday was not a good sign to Marla. Marla assumed that Stanley was starting to get careless with his double life and spending more time with another woman. At this rate, she knew that something had to be said. The longer it went, the worst the outcome could be. Instead of dwelling on it, Marla decided to wait until she saw Diane face-to-face. She put her phone away and went inside to start preparing food with Michael.

Later into the evening, the sun was beginning to set. Michael “que’d” some steaks, burgers, and a few halved chickens. The entire time he stood out on the back patio, he kept visioning Jimmy sitting on his patio and enjoying the smell of barbeque. The thought of Jimmy being gone still hadn’t sunk in for Michael. He kept looking across the patio, hoping to see Jimmy come out of his house and ask could he come over to eat. All of those comical self-invites were no longer there. Now, Michael was taking his barbeque to where Jimmy once lived. Several times, he drifted off as he barbequed and thought about Jimmy.

As Michael and Marla covered all of the food to be transported together, Michael stopped and gave Marla a kiss on the lips. Although the kiss was unexpected, Marla totally understood why he planted one on her. She only responded with a smile and continued to package all of the food. The more Michael thought about Jimmy, the more he realized how unpredictable and priceless life is. He knew he had to cherish every moment he was allowed to share with his family. Every day became an opportunity, a privilege, and a blessing. Looking at Marla’s eyes, displayed the woman he chose to spend his life with. He could hear the pastor asking him: “….through thick and thin, for better or for worse, for as long as you both shall live.” It was a commitment that he made, despite the flaws, the mistakes, and the mishaps. It was a commitment that he dedicated his life to. And as long as he had breath in his lungs, he was determined to fulfill that promise.

Marla and Michael finally made it to Rhonda’s house, with Junior in tow. The second visit was two-hundred times easier than earlier. Both of them had managed to get over the initial shock and placed all of their focus on comforting Rhonda. Marla informed Rhonda that she had invited some guests. She informed Rhonda that they simply wanted to show their condolences in her time of bereavement. Rhonda didn’t have the strength to question the guests, even if she wanted to. She simply nodded her head in agreement, as she watched Michael and Marla setup the food.