A Mother's Love (20 page)

              I was dressed and ready to go. I had added some extra pieces of hair in the front of my hair to have a bang. I was looking good I had on a white dress that hugged my curves just right. I added a little make up just to outline my eyes. I heard the doorbell and knew it was Mike. I had received a text from Terance the day he left my house. He was telling me he knew I was a hoe and that is why he left me. Whatever I thought, Terance was the only man I had been with since I had started seeing Mike so he could think whatever he wanted. I was fine so what he had to say was really irrelevant.

              I answered the door and there stood my man Mike looking so good. He had his dreads pulled back into a ponytail. I could smell his Usher cologne and I damn near told him not to even take me to lunch. He had a dozen roses in his hands.

“Hey honey,” I grabbed the roses and gave him a kiss.

He sucked my tongue. “You better stop.” I said.

I locked the door and we headed to the car. Mike was quiet and that was unusual for him. Maybe his trip didn’t go as planned. The last time he went to New York they were only trying to pay him a hundred thousand for two records. That Ty Jones was something else. I know Mike wasn’t big time but they must have thought he was dumb, the next time they called him he told him that if they wanted him they would have to come correct.

              That was a year ago and now he had all kinds of people trying to give him a deal so now Ty Jones was back to make another offer. Ty Jones at REAL records was the hottest recording label with major pull. All his clients got major media attention, and all their records and videos got played on BET that is why Mike wanted to go with him. But he had waited it out, and I know the outcome would be good. We pulled up at the little Italian restaurant. I got out and walked towards Mike. He still wasn’t saying anything but he was looking nice and smiling at me. Maybe he was just tired from all the back and forth. We sat our booth and they gave us a bottle of red wine. I poured each of us a glass.

“Baby you been quiet the whole ride here what’s going on? How was the meeting?”I asked eating the bread sticks that were on the table.

I was hungry. I had always ate a lot but as of lately I had been having some cravings. Mike smiled at me.

“Everything is good, Ty changed his mind and he wanna give me half a million to do three albums.” He smiled.

“Really baby that’s good. So within how many years?” I asked I was excited my man was going to be out here.

“Two years I gotta make three albums in two years.” That was a shitty contract.

Because what if his first album flopped, yeah Ty Jones was on something but I couldn’t tell him that he was too happy.

“Aw okay baby please the way you make music you can do it.” I said reassuring him.

We ordered our lunch and talked about New York. I had never been there. He told me how big it was.

“So if I go through with this you gone be right there with me?”

“Of course.” I said.

We had just finished eating and were waiting on dessert. I had ordered a cheesecake.

“I mean you know I’m gone be out of town a lot and doing shows. You can’t be thinking I’m fucking around or nothing you gotta be secure about us.”

“I know baby do I be tripping on you now?”
“Naw you don’t but that all could change.”

“It won’t.” I said giving him a kiss.

The waiter brought our dessert. I was looking at my scrumptious cheesecake, Mike had some ice cream. They put the cake in front of me and I was nervous. Was that a ring on top? I looked at Mike shit I didn’t want to assume he was purposing and it was for me. He looked at me and smiled.

“Baby pick up that ring and put it on your finger.” I started crying.

Oh it was for me. I grabbed the ring. I licked the ring. And put it on my finger.

“I already know your answer so I ain’t even gone ask.” I laughed he was so cocky. But he was right he did know me and I knew him and I knew that I loved him and wanted to be with only him.

“Yeah you know me too well.”

We sat and ate our dessert I had a smile on face the entire time. Here I was about to get married, and it was to a man I actually loved. My mama would be so happy for me right now her oldest child was getting married. I was happy but some part of me was sad. I needed my Mama.

              We left the restaurant and headed to the hospital to see Grandma. She still hadn’t died and I was happy she hadn’t. She was holding on but she was going to die soon. I wonder what she was holding on to. This was Mike’s first time coming to the hospital with me. And although Grandma wasn’t responsive I still wanted them to meet. We walked into the room and Grandma was still laying in the bed sleep. She was unconscious. I still came to see her at least every other day. I sat next to her bed and grabbed her hand.

“Grandma this is Mike.” I said “He just proposed to me. So we going to have some kids, yeah I know you never liked Terance. Well I am over him.” I said laughing.

Grandma didn’t even know Terance was married she just never liked him. That was crazy. I remember when I brought him home to have dinner with us. He walked in the kitchen and Grandma hugged me.

“Grandma this is Terance, Terance this is my Grandma Nancy.” He reached out his hand towards her and she looked at it with disgust.

“Um,” she turned her lips up, “Seem like I just lost my appetite.” She said and walked in her room.

Yeah Granny was a trip. Terance was upset and wanted to leave after that. When we got in the car he lit right in me.

“Your stupid ass family was her old ass drunk or something.” He said driving me back to my house.

“You better be glad I didn’t slap the old heifer. I see why you act the way you do you was raised by that old heifer. She had some nerve.” For Terance to be a teacher he had a nasty attitude and horrible language. He cursed like a sailor.

“So yeah Granny I am happy now. Mike loves me unconditionally.” I looked at Mike and smiled. He was standing next to me. He hadn’t said a word.

“Well we gone leave Granny.” I got up and kissed my Granny forehead.

Mike came and kissed her forehead too. We were walking out of the room when her heart rate went flat. The machine started to buzz. I started calling for the nurses but I knew there was nothing she could do. They ran in and tried to bring her back but she was gone. Mike grabbed me and held me all the way to the car. Grandma Nancy had finally passed away but she knew her baby girl was happy.

Chapter Twenty Seven

Violet

Daphne’s Grandmother Nancy had passed so we were on our way to her funeral. Kane and I rode in our car, Daphne rode in the limo with Mike, her father Lo and his wife Amanda. Shamar, Jr., and Brittany rode together. It was an awful experience. I cried for my sister Grandma Nancy was like her mother after our Mom died. I was kind of crying for myself too. I didn’t have anybody really. I had my siblings but I didn’t have an older adult in my life like a mother or father. Aunt Tesha raised me but she wasn’t a real parent.

              Aunt Tesha never really wanted any kids. I guess our Grandmother had put so much stuff in her head about Mom and having kids that she didn’t want any kids. I was her child that she didn’t want. She took me in after Mom died but only because she didn’t want me to go to the state. I remember the day after Mom died. We were in the kitchen eating and Q told us that they were coming for him soon and we were going to be split up. I didn’t know what was really going on but my siblings did. Daphne started crying.

“Why Q? Why you can’t stay with us and take care of us? You don’t want us now that Mama dead.”

“Naw baby it’s not that. I love yall kids like my own but I did something bad and I have to be punished.” He said grabbing Daphne.

“Why cause you killed that nigga that killed Mama?” Shamar said. He was only seven at the time but he knew a lot.

“Aye don’t talk like that Mar. Although Ricky was wrong that don’t mean I was right.” Q said. A week later we were placed in foster care. Shamar and Jr.’s dad Shane came to get them first. He was talking all kinds of shit.

“Why the fuck yall got my little niggas up in here. Yall muthafucka should have contacted me.”

But he knew Mama was dead so he should have come to get his kids but since Quincy was out he thought that he would take care of them. But the state did not think that Quincy was a good role model. Next Nancy, Lo, and his wife came to get Daphne. She asked them could I come but they looked at her and shook their head. I wasn’t their blood so I wasn’t their responsibility.

              They left me and I was scared. I was in there a month at that group home for a month alone. Shamar would sneak in my room that I shared with five other kids. I would cry all night and all day. I felt so unwanted. I didn’t understand why my Dad never came to get me. So about a month of being in the group home I finally was saved by Aunt Tesha. I don’t know what made her come to get me but I was glad she did.

              She was an okay parent at first when I was younger. I guess inside she really did want a child but all the things my Grandmother had told her had got to her. She bought me clothes and she made sure me and my siblings were together and knew each other. Shamar was the only one who made sure he would come and see me even when we didn’t have play dates. He even transferred to my elementary school. That is how we got close he made sure he went to the same schools as me. He was my protector, my big brother.

Daphne would call me every day and we would talk for hours, we haven’t done that lately. She would always apologize for her Grandma and Dad since they didn’t take me in. But I told her it was okay. Jr. really never talked to me. I don’t know why I think he kind of felt bad for me. He was never a real big brother when we were younger but now we were closer than ever. I was working with him now on how he could get Beauty. I was about twelve when Aunt Tesha told me about my Mom and Dad and it was not a sit down let’s discuss what happened it was out of hate.

One day I had come home late from school. At age twelve I had started wearing makeup and wearing kinky twists and micro braids. I loved weave because I really did have short hair. So I walked in and Aunt Tesha went in on me. So I responded by telling her that she was not my Mother or Father.

And she went to respond by saying, “Oh shit you think I care about not being that fag or that whore. Yeah your fag ass father was fucking your mother’s friend Ricky boyfriend. That’s why she dead and he dead! Now I gotta take care of your little bad ass.” I didn’t have a response. I just ran in my room and called Mar Mar he would tell me.

              I called my brother and he told me he would ask Quincy about it. A week later he confirmed my greatest fear it was my Dad’s fault. Mar Mar told me it was okay and that they still loved me. I never forgave Aunt Tesha after that. I lived with her and she bought me things and she let my siblings come over but she did not like me she didn’t like us. That was how we grew apart and our relationship would never be mended.

              After the funeral we had the wake at our house. I didn’t want my sister to have to clean up and cook for people this was her lost. I had cooked all the food too. Yeah I could cook just like my sister but I just didn’t like it like she did. I made baked beans, ribs, chicken, greens, yams, cornbread, Mac n cheese, we had ham, and assorted rolls. Yeah I had hooked it up the only person who knew I knew how to cook was my siblings and Kane. All the guest were complimenting my food. I told them to take plates. After the guest left Shamar, Kane, Mike, Jr., Daphne, and I blazed and drank. We talked about all types of stuff. Brittany had gone home she didn’t wanna be around the smoke. This was what I lived for kicking it with the people I love. And I had to admit I really did love Kane. He was my everything.

              After that incident at the club we started talking more. He got a maid to come do his laundry but I still cleaned and cooked. I even enjoyed it now that it wasn’t a chore it was something I did for the man I loved yeah he was wonderful. After they left we cuddled and fell asleep. The next morning I woke up to some red roses next to me. Aw Kane was sweet when he wanted to be. I got dressed and got ready for my Monday morning class. I had decided to add an extra class to my schedule. I wasn’t doing anything anyway. After class I rode to the hood to talk to Cashmere.

              We had talked since that night at the club and she was upset at first but once she found out what happened she laughed at me. And I couldn’t blame her cause I was in the wrong. She was glad that I was okay and I was glad that we were still friends. I pulled up to Cashmere’s building and it was plenty people out as usual. I hadn’t told her I was coming so I pushed the doorbell.

“Who is it!” She screamed from the window.

“Violet!” She buzzed me in. I walked in her apartment and was surprised I didn’t find a million muthafucka.

“Where the hell is everybody at?” I said sitting on her couch.

“Girl please muthafucka better stay away from me. My muthafucking rent money got stole and nobody knows what happened. Stupid ass muthafucka.” She said lighting a blunt.