A Perfect Mistress (12 page)

W
hen they stopped for the night, the talk ended. They would eat dinner in near silence in the public rooms of the inns or
boarding houses where Jackson checked them in as man and wife
, their eyes meeting often, desire building in them both. They would eat slowly, sitting across each other
at
the table without touching nearly torture, until Sophie would feel lightheaded from the waiting. They could have served her anything at those meals;
she
couldn’t
have told you
what was on her plate. She ate it dutifully, not tasting it, waiting for the moment when they would walk to their room together.

As soon as the door shut behind them, they were in each other’s arms.
Each night, it got better and better, and Sophie wondered if it would be like this always. Would she always feel this overwhelming need to be in his arms? Would his voice in her ear always make her shiver so deliciously, and would he forever want her so badly that he could think of nothing else, as he had told her
last night
?
It
couldn’t
last fo
rever.
C
ould it?

Sophie
didn’t
know, but she hoped so. She had no experience with this sort of thing; with David, it had been entirely different. It was
calm and peaceful, and their time in bed had
been loving
, but she hadn’t craved it.
It
had been
e
njoyable, but not necessary to her peace of mind.

Each morning, when she opened her eyes, a smile came to her face when she saw his head beside hers on the pillow. Sometimes, he was awake and watching her, and sometimes Sophie woke him with soft kisses and strokes.
Every morning, they made a late start.
Jackson
didn’t
seem to mind, and Sophie didn’t, either.

She loved him. She loved Jackson.

The thought hit her like a bolt of lightning, and Sophie sat straight up in bed where she had been lingering.
Jackson stirred beside her and opened his eye to look at her.

Sophie smiled at him.

“
Good morn…
”

Her greeting ended in a squeak as he pulled her down into his arms
with a growl
and crushed his mouth to hers. Sophie stopped thinking and threw her arms around his neck. She kissed him for all she was worth, holding nothing back.

She would worry about the future later. She had now, and it was enough.

********

The last day of their journey was bittersweet for Sophie. She longed to get out of this wagon, but she dreaded arriving at the same time.
What if things changed?
What if Jackson was too busy to make time for
her,
and what would everyone think of an unmarried woman staying in his home? She knew that Jackson told her he
didn’t
leave the farm much, but surely he had
some
friends. Would they shun her, or slight her? Would any decent woman dare to
be seen
in her company? It had been so long since
she’d
had a woman friend of her own, and she wanted that again.

“You’re awfully quiet.”

Sophie smiled at him.
“Just thinking.”

“Is it thinking that has put the line between your eyes?” He clucked to the horse, which had picked up the pace until he was trotting, even pulling the full wagon. “He knows he’s almost home and he wants his stable.
We’ll
be at Geddes within the hour, but I’m going to bypass town. I want to get home almost as badly as this horse does.”

True to his word, Jackson took the road around the town. Sophie looked wistfully back at the buildings she could see from the road. It seemed a nice place. She hoped it was so. Jackson caught her looking.

“Don’t worry. I’ll bring you back in a couple of days, Sophie.”

She smiled at him again, holding her tongue. In less than an hour, they turned into a road bordered by trees on either side.

“My father planted these when he first bought the place. It’s just up over this rise, Sophie.” He grinned at her boyishly. “I can’t wait for you to see it.”

He stopped the wagon on the top of the incline, and Sophie’s mouth dropped open.

This was a
farm
?

The house was three stories, and a verandah wrapped around the top two floors. Four white columns graced the front of the structure, and there were stairs leading up to the massive front doors.
The house was surrounded by flowers
, and Sophie fancied that it must take an army of gardeners just to keep it weeded.

“My father fancied Greek architecture.
It’s
a bit pretentious, but there’s a lot of room. If you want to change anything, feel free. I
haven’t
bothered since I moved in, but
it would be a relief if you did.
I’m not fond of the furnishings but I’ve been too busy to worry with it.”

Sophie found her voice.

“Jackson, when you said farm…I never thought…my goodness!”

“Let’s go on in,” he said, laughing.

But
when they got closer, it was to find some kind of commotion happening
in the front drive
. A carriage
with a driver on top
was there, and two women were arguing vociferously with a small man. Jackson cursed under his breath.

“My sisters,” he said. “This isn’t going to be pleasant.”

The women were both dressed entirely in black, and Sophie could see that
their clothing was good quality, but it
wasn’t
to her taste. There were more ruffles than were entirely appropriate for women of their age. One was short and stout, while the other woman was tall and thin, but Sophie could tell that they were sisters. They shared some of the same features – and they wore an identical expression of disdain when they looked over at Jackson.

“Ladies,” he said, doffing his hat. “What’s the problem,
Mr.
Lakin
?”

“These ladies seem to think they can come here and tell me what to do,” said the man, his chest puffed up and his eyes narrowed. “They’ve been here every day for two weeks, interfering with my schedule, going into the house and getting the cook all riled up.” He glared at the two women, who glared back. “It seems to me that some of the little
geegaws
you had in the foyer are missing, as well. I can’t prove it, but I got my suspicions.”

“Everyone knows that servants steal, especially when their master is away,” said the stout one in a high, whiny voice. “We won’t stand here and be insulted by Mr.
Lackey
.”

“Lackey!
Why, you old…”

“Mr.
Lakin
, why don’t you take the wagon down to the
stables.
I’ll
be there in just a few minutes. Have someone bring the supplies to the house for me,” Jackson said smoothly, getting down and helping Sophie out, who clung to him for a moment. Her legs felt weak, and she
wasn’t
sure if it was from the ride or from being exposed to such ugliness from his sisters. “I’m sure this is just a mistake.
One that won’t happen again.”

Mr.
Lakin
climbed up and drove off, still muttering to himself.
“Would you like to come in for a while?”

“Absolutely not!” they chorused, and Sophie saw the hurt on his face.
Jackson might say that he
didn’t
care what his half sisters thought, but it was readily apparent to Sophie that he did. If they suddenly threw themselves into his arms and burst into tears of contrition for what they had done, she had no doubt that he would forgive them completely.

He wanted their love, and he was never going to get it. It broke Sophie’s heart.

“
It’s up to you, of course.
But
where are my manners? I haven’t introduced you.” He made a gesture towards Sophie. ”
This is my …friend, Mrs. Sophie Grey,”
he said haltingly
.

“
Don’t bother.
We only came to the farm because you had been gone for so long,” the skinny one broke in. She lifted her pointed chin and turned away. “We hoped you might be dead. That is our fondest wish. Come, sister.”

Sophie gasped
out loud
.
The stout one drew herself up and looked down her nose at
them both
.
She
spoke again, and Sophie itched to slap her sneering face.

“I don’t have any need to be introduced to such
trash
. No decent woman would associate with you,
” she said haughtily.
“You know, don’t you, that
your friend
cares no more for you than anyone else does,
so
she must be with you for your money. She’s not even worthy of
you
.”

They linked arms and stared at Jackson.

“How dare you!” Sophie started to splutter. Jackson held up his hand, and Sophie subsided.
Jackson’s
voice was
as
cold as ice when he answered
his sister.

“You’re right, of course.
Some people are
n’t worthy to wipe your feet on.
”

Sophie felt the words like a blow. 

She stagge
red backwards, her face white.
He
didn’t
see the impact his words had, for his back was still to her
as he watched his sisters
ride away
.
She put a hand to her chest, trying to hold the pain in, for it felt as if her heart would explode in her chest. 

Truly, she could understand his reasoning, for
hadn’t
she lied and cheated her way into his h
ouse?
But
, oh, God, it hurt her to have her ow
n thoughts voiced in this way.
It hurt to hear him say those things in his cool, beautiful voice, even
though she knew it to be true.
He deserved to have someone innocent and beautiful in his life, and she w
as neither of those things.
Once, perhaps, before Thomas raped her on the floor in the l
ibrary, but that was long ago.
She shoul
d never have let herself hope.
This should be a lesson to her.

“I see,” she said when they were gone and
she thought she could trust her voice not to crack and break. 
Hadn’t
she humiliated
herself enough, without crying
?  She must be calm, for her pride demanded no less.

“Well,” she said.  “I
f that’s the way you feel, I
’ll start packing my things, then.”

He turned back to eye her sharply, and then took both of her shoulders in his hands, giving her a gentle shake. “Don't be ridiculous,” he said, and the caress of his voice made her pulse jump, as it always did. “I meant
them
, Sophie, not you.
They’re
old and bitter, and they’re going to be alone forever.
Don’t
jump to such conclusions.
I
was going to wait until tonight, but I think I should tell you
now
: I
love you, you stupid woman.
I want to marry you and keep you with me forever.
I’ve loved you since that first day.
”

He leaned forward to brush his lips to hers, and she let her lips part slightly, just enough to send a quick flick of her tongue into his mouth.  When he drew back, his face was alight with laughter, and she beamed up at him, bringing up her hand to cup the scarred side of his face. He never even flinched, and Sophie's smile got even brighter.

“Right,” she said briskly. “I'll learn to trust, and you'll laugh more. You've a very handsome face when you smile, you know.”

“So I've been told.”

“You'll have to give up the habit of calling me a stupid woman if you expect me to marry you, Jackson.  I have no respect for women who let
themselves
be pushed around.”

“That's settled, then,” he said, his voice husky.  “I won't call you stupid ever again, and you'll stay with me always.”

“Always,” Sophie said, and it was a vow.  He took her hand and lifted it to his mouth, caressing it with a kiss.  

Then he tucke
d her arm beneath his. They walked up the stairs and
entered the door
of the house
together.