Nagging underneath that desire to know Lucien in a more intimate way lived the very real knowledge that he was still leading her into a trap that could crush her—perhaps to a state from which she would never recover. Yet all night, no matter how many times she’d gone round and round about what to do, she’d always come back to one thing about Lucien Cabot: He was someone who struggled so clearly with grief over losing his brother, and someone who inspired such loyalty in his employees… Somewhere within a person like that a beautiful, loving, devoted soul had to exist. More than anything, Sophie wanted to know the man Lucien kept hidden behind his sardonic wit and cool eyes.
Sophie had woken up this morning with a plan to ask Lucien to eat breakfast with her, only to have Magnus share that Lucien had taken a walk around the island to clear his head. Although deflated, Sophie had hung around the study, using the time to read more of the Raven Island history. When, after over an hour, Lucien still had not returned, Sophie had found herself unable to sit still, much as Lucien had apparently experienced earlier. After excusing herself, she’d wandered outside—hoping to see Lucien, she could admit it—and instead had come upon Cale doing some cleanup with Owen’s help. The snow from a few days ago now completely gone, Sophie had pitched in for a few hours, needing to do something physical to distract her from thoughts of Lucien, but had eventually returned indoors. One shower later, something she’d needed to get the sweat and grime off her from working outside, Sophie now found herself back at square one outside Lucien’s study door.
Exhaling, pumping herself up mentally, Sophie pushed into Lucien’s study, only to find it completely empty. Not even Magnus remained this time. The spirit and energy Sophie had maintained since waking up that morning slowly seeped out of her pores, leaving her lethargic. How in the heck was she supposed to take a chance and pursue this man if he hid himself from her? Virtually every time she’d needed Lucien for something since arriving at Ravenstoke, she had come to his study, and there he was, working.
Heck, he even plays in here sometimes
. Yet all of a sudden, after what she’d done with him last night, he’d apparently decided to avoid the room like the plague.
Jerking upright, Sophie spun and ran down the hallway toward the wing of rooms clearly designed for extracurricular activities. Perhaps Lucien had felt the need to reestablish the control he normally exerted over himself sexually and was right now watching another sexual tableau play out before his eyes. If he could sit through another round of sex among his staff members and not succumb to orgasm, maybe he would feel as if he’d restored some order to his life.
Reaching the hallway, Sophie threw open the first door, only to find it empty and in shadows. She quickly did the same for the second and then the third, only to find them free of any afternoon peccadilloes too. Losing her burst of adrenaline, Sophie checked the rest of the rooms anyway but didn’t find Lucien or any of the other household staff.
So much for that idea.
Her burst of energy now sapped, Sophie trudged back down the hallway toward the stairs. Her stomach grumbled, reminding her she’d put off lunch for too long.
Might as well at least satisfy the one hunger I can control
. As Sophie made her way to the kitchen, doubts attacked her like buzzards on a carcass. What was she doing anyway, running around a castle trying to chase down a man who obviously didn’t want to be found? She’d never been one of those desperate women who put a man above everything else. If she continued to pursue this man—someone who’d given her every indication he didn’t want anything more than attachment-free fun—she treaded dangerously toward the realm of pathetic and starry-eyed romantic. Sophie shuddered at the thought.
At the same time, much as she couldn’t get the nagging voice out of her head that told her she was at Ravenstoke for a reason, lived Magnus’s voice encouraging her to take a chance with Lucien. More than his words, Sophie recalled the sincerity in his eyes and his tone. He cared about his boss, and he wanted something to rattle the man’s cage. For some reason, he believed Sophie was the woman to do it. Mumbling with frustration at all the half information, secrets, and shadows, Sophie sputtered but then silently chastised herself for her indecision. She was never wishy-washy like this.
Buck up, woman. Just decide once and for all what you want to do and then do it.
She entered the kitchen to find Jade cursing “Stupid machine” and smacking her computer.
Upon seeing the statuesque beauty, Sophie felt her cheeks heat. “Hi!”
Shoot
. She’d forced such a chipper tone into her greeting she might as well have been a cartoon princess with a bluebird on her shoulder. She sometimes wondered if the people in this castle could read her mind, though, and for a second, she’d thought for sure Jade would take one look at her and know she’d been running around the castle looking to give Lucien another blowjob. Taking a breath, Sophie said, “I mean, good afternoon.”
Jade smiled, and it lit up the turquoise in her eyes. “It’s all right, you know. Blushing and awkwardness is okay. The hello is always weird the first few times after you’ve done something sexual in front of people who are virtual strangers to you.”
“Yeah. Ahh…yeah.” Wringing her hands at her front and then behind her back, Sophie fidgeted, unable to stand still. “I’ve never done anything like that before,” she admitted. “And certainly never thought I would in front of people I’ve only known for a few days—with a man I’ve only known for that long too.” Her lips and tongue recalled the taste and feel of Lucien’s cock, and her face went even hotter. “Sorry. I’m acting like an idiot.”
“It’s okay.” Jade’s gaze and smile remained open and welcoming. “But the circumstances are unusual in this case. I bet you’ve spent more time with us—I’m talking literal hours—since stepping foot on the island than you have in a month with some of the people you probably consider good friends.” Raising a perfectly arched dark brow, she added, “Most of that time has been spent with Lucien. It’s not so strange for you to feel a connection with him so quickly.”
“I suppose.” Sophie still couldn’t help feeling as if she stood naked in this kitchen. After all, Jade had seen her nude twice now. Sophie could be honest enough to admit she had pictured Jade naked in those first few moments upon seeing her again. “It still doesn’t make all this feel any less odd, though.” Unable to help it, Sophie rubbed her arms and drew her hoodie sweater tighter across her front.
Jade’s gaze softened as much as Magnus’s had last night. “I understand that too.”
Drawn in to this odd, interesting group of empathetic people, Sophie shuffled closer to the table where Jade sat. “I noticed you beating up your computer when I walked in. Is everything all right?”
“I’m trying to pare down the footage we shot of Owen playing in the snow,” Jade explained. “I want to send some of it to my mom so she can see how much fun he had. But this stupid machine keeps messing it up every time I try to save the clips and merge them together.” She glared at the laptop once more.
After pulling out a chair and taking a seat, Sophie reached out but then paused with her hand inches from the laptop. “Mind if I take a look?”
“Please.” Jade slid the computer in front of Sophie. “I’ll take any help I can get.”
It didn’t take but one glance at the screen and layout for Sophie to nod along with a little “Aha.” She glanced up at Jade. “It’s not the computer so much as a program unfriendly for the user. It makes the process five times harder than it has to be.” After chewing on her cheek for a moment, Sophie finally blurted, “If you’d like, we can upload the footage to my laptop, and I can help you put something together in probably less than an hour.”
“Seriously?” Jade’s eyes glittered like the purest Caribbean ocean water. “You don’t mind?”
“No problem.” Buoyant again, Sophie squeezed Jade’s hand. “It’ll be fun. If you want to get a little splashier, we can cut it up and put some voiceover stuff in to make it look like a little news story. Owen can narrate it, or we can put some music and splice it in a really cool way to make it look like a video on MTV. Whatever you think your mom will like.”
“She’d like hearing Owen the most, and I think Owen would have a blast doing it.” After making a little squealing noise, Jade gave Sophie an abbreviated hug from the side. “Thank you so much.”
Just as Sophie said, “It’s my pleasure,” her stomach rumbled again.
Grinning, Jade glanced toward the kitchen area. “Emma left you some tomato soup in the pot on the stove. It’s made from scratch.”
With a happy hum, Sophie got up to fix herself a bowl. “Thanks.”
While Sophie prepared lunch, Jade went back to fiddling with the laptop. After bringing everything back to the table and gobbling a few bites to take away the edge on her hunger, Sophie couldn’t help sneaking glances at Jade. She could barely suppress the questions pushing inside her to get out.
Sophie managed to get another spoonful of the smooth, tangy tomato soup down her throat, but when she opened her mouth to take a sip of water, instead she said, “Can I ask you a question that is entirely too personal and probably not appropriate?”
With a shrug and a nod, Jade kicked back in the booth seating. “Sure. Ask away. Then I’ll decide if I want to answer.”
“That’s fair.” Now that she had someone willing to speak, Sophie struggled to find the right question, one that wouldn’t offend this person she already feared she cared about much more than she should. After throwing out delicate phrases that sounded trite in her head, she bit the bullet and did what she did best: straightforward and blunt. “I’m making an educated guess that you and Emma are a couple. I’m doing that based on how loving I’ve seen the two of you be with each other, not only due to the kissing and sex between you, but in the affectionate words you use with each other too. But then Magnus was somewhat involved in what happened in the study as well. And on the first night I was here, I saw Emma with Cale and Magnus, and Cale acted as if the sun rose and fell on Emma. And then last night you were with Cale and Magnus, and while Magnus was the one who had sex with Cale, you are the one who took care of his body in the aftermath, so…”
Jade picked up the trail and asked, “And you want to know what the hell is going on?”
“I guess I’m more curious to know who is paired with whom.” Sophie rubbed at the tension growing in her brow. “Or are all four of you together? Or is it all five of you with Lucien too, even though he just watches? I don’t understand the roles or even if there are ones.”
With her straightforward stare, Jade raised a brow. “Do you think you’re being auditioned as a sixth?”
“Honest to God?” Rubbing at the furrows marring her forehead again, Sophie admitted, “I don’t know.”
More of that empathetic gentleness edged Jade’s striking features. “I can only speak about the relationship I’m in, and for me, I’m with Emma and Cale. They’re both equally with me. We all love each other. We’re in love with each other, and with Owen, we’re a family. As Owen’s uncle, Lucien is obviously a part of his life—as well as the fact that he employs us all—but he is not a part of the romantic relationship between me, Emma, and Cale. Nor is Magnus.”
Sophie’s brows knitted as she dropped her chin into her hand. “Yet you all play together at Lucien’s whim.”
Jade shook her head whiplash fast. “Not all of us at one time. At least not here at Ravenstoke. Someone is always with Owen in order to keep him safe and separated from the adult play that goes on here. Owen is restricted to the first level of Ravenstoke, and all sexual activity happens upstairs.” Shrugging, Jade mimicked the way Sophie held her head with her hand. “But otherwise, yes, we play together because we enjoy sex, and we’re able to separate the act from being in love with someone. The three of us are committed to each other, but occasionally Cale craves the whip and being handled by another man. Sometimes Emma feels like she’ll crawl out of her skin if she doesn’t have two men pushing her at once. Right now Magnus fills that desire in my partners. In an ideal world, he would be a fourth and occupy that spot missing in their lives, but while Magnus loves us, he is not in love with us, and he is still struggling to accept what he needs emotionally and physically in a partner. What Magnus does with us releases a physical need in him and is not a soul-deep emotional bond.”
Everything sexual Sophie had observed since arriving at Raven Island started to fall into place. “And that’s what you have with Emma and Cale,” she murmured, her heart tugging at the pure light in Jade’s eyes. “A soul-deep, emotional bond.”
“Absolutely.” The woman actually sat up straight, and she slid her hand to cover her heart. “I would die for them. I’d die for that little boy the same as if he shared my blood. Cale would too.”
“And your mom is progressive enough to be okay with your situation?” Awe filled Sophie. She couldn’t keep herself indifferent or distant with these people any more than she could Lucien. “She just accepts that you’re involved with a man and a woman?”
Jade nodded, and a mile-wide grin took over her beautiful face. “My mom fell in love with Cale and Emma when she realized how the two of them completely settled the wanderer in me. When I left home at eighteen, I started traveling and never stopped. I rarely went home. I was always restless to keep moving. Then I landed in DC and got a job at a nightclub. That’s where I met Emma and Cale. They changed my life.”
Warmth filled Sophie’s heart. “That is wonderful. If you think about it, what the three of you have is very traditional in an incredibly unconventional way.”
Jade shrugged, but she beamed from every pore. “My mother probably wouldn’t put it in quite such a romantic or eloquent manner, but that’s pretty much how she sees it too. I love her even more for it because Emma and Cale don’t have that same acceptance from their families. My mom has become something of a loving parental figure for them too.”
“It’s great that your mother recognizes that you all love each other and that’s all that matters to her.”