A Rake Reformed (A Gentleman of Worth Book 6) (16 page)

“Why didn’t you tell me? Am I no longer trusted? I am crushed, beyond belief!” Trevor splayed his hand upon his chest. “If this gets around Town
ma
-reputation will suffer. Oh, yes. It shall.
Ma
-character will be in question.” He gesticulated wildly and glared at Freddie. “What of
ma
-family?
Ma
-wife and
ma-
children?”

“Trevor, I believe your drama is on display. You do not have a wife nor any children so would you be so good as to bring down the curtain?” Freddie crossed to the hearth and motioned to one of the chairs. “Please sit and let us
calmly
discuss this matter.” He took a seat and waited for Trevor to do the same.

“I may be married and have children by the time I return to London,” he said in all sincerity before following Freddie into the room. He sat in the flanking chair, next to Freddie.

“Now.” Freddie made himself comfortable and was ready to tackle Trevor’s puzzle. “Please start from the beginning and tell me what you’re going on about.”

“Is it true? And if it is, why haven’t you told me?”

“My dear fellow, you must give me a hint as to what you are talking about. Is
what
true?”

“You and Miss Rosalind. Kissing. Under the—the—the—” He waved wildly above his head.

“In the parlor?” Freddie was now getting the gist of it.

“Exactly.” Trevor nodded.

“As a matter of fact, yes. We did share a kiss. It was very nice and I hope to—”

“No. Oh, no!” Trevor put out his hands as if silencing Freddie would make his actions null and void. “You cannot allow that to happen. No, absolutely not.”

“Whatever do you mean?” Freddie felt a bit indignant at his
friend’s
disapproval. “If you will remember, it is Miss
Clare
you wish to marry, not her sister, Miss Rosalind. I understand that to you they may look similar but let me remind you
Clare
is the one with the red hair and green eyes.”

“
Dash it all
, Freddie! It ain’t
ma-
meaning.”

“What
is
your meaning, pray?”

“Miss Rosalind isn’t to be trifled with, especially by you.”

“
Trifled
? I have no intention of doing such a thing.”

“No? What is the meaning of kissing Miss Rosalind under the—the—” Trevor waved above his head once again.

“If I must tell you,
kissing
is a means of expressing affection between a man and a woman. I was pretty sure you knew that.”

“Don’t be impertinent with me! But I know that’s not what you’re doing. I know you.” Trevor was now on his feet. He pointed an accusing finger at Freddie and laid into him. “You’re the one who whispers in their ear, plays slap and tickle with the ladies, gives ’em the slip on the shoulder, before having your way, and leaving them the next morning.”

“That’s awfully harsh, Trev.” Freddie frowned. He never thought about the conduct of his younger self but it wasn’t very flattering. But he wasn’t that man now.

“It’s true, and you cannot treat the sister of my soon-to-be intended in that manner. I’ll meet you at dawn over this, Fred, I swear.”

He was willing to fight for her and her family?
By God, Trevor did love Clare.

“There is no need, I can assure you.” Freddie remained seated with his back firmly planted in the chair. “Rosalind is entirely different from any other female I have ever met.”

Trevor said nothing. His expression did not change. Perhaps he had not been completely convinced of Freddie’s intentions.

“I love her, Trev. I want to make her my countess. If I do not play my cards right, and I as you know have not been having the best luck, it may turn out that I lose her before I have the chance to tell her of my affection.”

“Then why don’t you tell her
now
?” Trevor suggested in exasperation.

“How I feel about her or who I am?” Freddie hated to think the two were intertwined. Telling her of his affection would be easy; admitting who he
really
was seemed near impossible.

“All of it. Don’t keep anything from her. It’s best if you come clean, that’s
ma
-advice on the matter. Rosalind’ll see the right of it in the end. She’s bound to.”

“If I tell her who I really am, I don’t know that she’ll ever speak to me again. But you are right, with your connection to Clare she’s bound to learn of it, one way or the other. My identity will be revealed. I’m dreading it. I had hoped to put it off; however, it is becoming increasingly obvious to me I need to do it sooner than later. And I expect the news would be best if I am the one to tell her.”

“
I
have no intention of breaking that bit of news to anyone. I would fear for
ma-
very neck.” Trevor held his hand to his throat and swallowed hard.

“And the rebuilding of Penshaw and its estate plays a large part in my future and my future with her. Even if she were willing to have me, I cannot ask her to marry me without a proper home. Not only do I need to redeem myself for my own self-worth, I need to make amends to the tenants, and restore the faith my father has placed in me. And I have to do it for Rosalind. There’ll be no future with her without Penshaw, and there’s no guarantee she’ll be there after it’s all done.”

“Good God, Fred.” Trevor collapsed into the chair. “How did you manage to get yourself into
this
tangle?”

Freddie turned his head toward his friend and gave him a frank answer. “I simply fell in love with a girl.”

Chapter Sixteen

I
t was deemed Rosalind was well enough to finally be given leave to roam the house that next morning. Again she spent an inordinate amount of time at her dressing table before the glass, checking her appearance. How vain one grew when one was in love.

Mindful of her recent ordeal, she took great care descending the staircase and stepping down to the main floor. She straightened her skirts and headed to the breakfast room. A wave of disappointment washed over her when she entered only to find it empty.

Maggie soon entered and informed her that Clare and Freddie, with the assistance of Harry and Gordon, were going out that morning to deliver food baskets. Freddie had already left some time ago and Clare was currently making preparations to leave.

As it happened, Rosalind came across her sister, and Mr. Trevor, quite by accident on her way to the parlor. She stopped short as not to be seen by them, keeping to the far side of the corridor.

“What do you think you’re doing?” Clare played at resisting her captor, mildly protesting, interspersed with giggles.

“I am helping you don your cloak, my girl. I have no wish for you to grow cold.” Mr. Trevor faced Clare, holding the neck of the cloak, and led her to the doorway of the parlor. “And then I am going to kiss you soundly.”

Obviously the two were sharing a private, intimate moment and Rosalind had no intention of disrupting their coze.

“Trevor! If you continue to behave in this way there’ll be no berries left for Rosalind and Mr. Freddie.” She had stopped resisting and stroked his face.

“I don’t
need
berries. We’re practically betrothed.” He bussed her cheek, one side then the other. Then he pleaded, “Must you leave?”

“Yes, dear, I must.” Clare wrapped her arms around her beloved’s neck. “Never fear, I shall return soon.”

“Not soon enough. Are you certain I cannot accompany you? I want to, you know. The idea of not seeing you for hours on end is quite unbearable.”

“You are not yet strong enough. The journey is much too strenuous. When you are better then I will happily welcome your company.” She smiled up at him. “We must part, just for now.”

“Your absence will be sorely felt. You know how much I dearly adore you?”

“Yes, I think I do.” Clare tilted her head and Trevor enveloped her in his arms and kissed her, just as soundly as he had promised.

Rosalind stepped back and leaned against the wall quite breathless and unwilling to witness her sister in such an amorous embrace. That was not how Freddie had kissed her yesterday. Their kiss was soft, gentle and full of promise.

How would she feel sharing such a heated, near-betrothal type of kiss? Rosalind wondered if that was what she could expect the next time they met under the mistletoe.

After Clare’s departure, Rosalind continued to the parlor. She thought she would make good use of the time until Freddie’s return by practicing her half of the four-hand piece. Freddie, who was by far a more skilled musician, had plenty of opportunity whereas she had not.

Rosalind found it difficult to concentrate. It was not the image of Mr. Trevor kissing Clare as much as the thought of Freddie kissing her with the same fervor. But after several hours Rosalind settled to the task before her and felt confident in her performance.

Approaching footsteps, male footsteps, sounded in the corridor. Freddie had returned! Rosalind stood and moved to the door to meet him, glancing in the direction she believed he would appear. Wringing her hands, she could hardly stand the suspense of seeing him once again.

Then he appeared. His dark hair was tussled, his cheeks reddened from the cold, and in his rush to find her, he neglected to straighten his cravat so it sat a little askew. To Rosalind he could not have been any more handsome.

“At last!” he said. “I feel as if I’ve been waiting forever.”

There was no polite curtsy or bow; Rosalind held her arms open wide to welcome him. He responded in kind, walking straight into them, fully embracing her.

“I am so very glad to see you.” Rosalind squeezed her eyes closed, relishing his touch.

“How are you feeling? You look well.” He stepped back, breaking their contact to have a look at her.

“I
am
quite well, thank you.” Rosalind had never had a man fuss over her in this way. She smiled and moved into the parlor.

“I have much to tell you.” He kept hold of her hand and followed. In a few long steps he was leading her. “We should sit. Would you like to sit? Yes, let’s do sit.”

Oh, he did sound serious, and Rosalind wasn’t sure she liked it.

“Tea? Would you like some tea?” He stepped before the sofa where they both settled.

“No, thank you.” She sensed his mounting discomfort.

“I could call for some tea for you, it would just take a moment,” he offered again.

“
Freddie
 . . . I am fine.” And he acted as if he were
very
nervous.

“
Freddie
 . . .” he whispered and his smile widened. “You called me
Freddie
.”

“Yes.” Rosalind glanced away feeling a bit self-conscious about using his Christian name. He had asked her to do so and she thought it would be appropriate when they were alone.

“Well, let’s see.” He took a moment to organize his thoughts. “First off, I visited the Walshes, the Renfields, and the Kerrs and they are all well. They all appeared pleased to see me and asked about you. I said that you were staying indoors for a few days and they ought not to worry.”

“That was kind of them to be concerned. Thank you for putting them at ease.” There was a moment of quiet and Rosalind wondered if
one
of the many things he wished to discuss with her was something
difficult
.

Freddie gazed at her wide-eyed and swallowed hard. “Rosalind, dearest, I wish you to know that you mean so very much to me.”

“I, too, care for you, Freddie.” Now Rosalind was certain the
difficult
part had something to do with the two of them, and it was becoming worrisome.

“There is nothing more I want than for this moment to last forever.”

Was this to imply this affection between them was about to end?

“This should be a joyous time when we confess our mutual feelings and admiration for one another, should it not?”

Rosalind had tempered her glee. She had sensed too well that unpleasantness waited just around the corner.

Freddie did not wish to hurt her. If he was correct about her feelings for him, it would devastate her to learn he was the very man she so heartily despised. In hurting her it would, in turn, gut him. He had no wish to harm her but continuing his lie would not serve any longer. It was now time to tell her the truth. But how would he go about it?

He took up her hands in his and gazed into her eyes. “I want to tell you how much I care for you. I
love
you.” Freddie felt every heartfelt word. “It is my wish for us to marry. Of course I must ask your father’s permission first, but I dare not approach him until I know if you will accept and I have my doubts if you will have me after you learn the truth.”

“What could be of such great importance that would make me not wish to marry you?” He could see her trepidation ebb and joy return in her expression.

Could she not imagine the very worst thing he might say to her? Could she even guess?

Freddie would have to say the words out loud and watch her reaction. He would see her glow of affection turn to revulsion and disdain. Nothing could be worse than that.

“There are the tenants, your friends and neighbors to consider.”

“I suppose we could not marry, then leave, could we?” She turned away from him to think. Of course they could not. Her marriage would not solve their problems, and she could not abandon them.

“I have a solution.” He paused before saying it. “The Earl of Brent.”

“The Earl of—” Rosalind’s voice rose and became very sharp. “How do you think he might help? He has never shown an ounce of concern since he acquired the property. What makes you think he would do so now?”

“Uh . . . as you know there is a connection between us. It is much stronger than I had allowed you, or anyone else, to believe.” Freddie eased into his confession. If only she were not so disagreeable when it came to
His Lordship
.

“Do you imagine your influence with Lord Brent so great he would take notice of the tenants?”

“I do.” Freddie knew for a fact he already
was
concerned and was willing to go through a great deal of effort to improve their living situation, their quality of life, and the entirety of life on the Penshaw estate itself.

“I had no idea you thought so highly of yourself.” She pulled her hands free from his. “It sounds almost as if you two were one and the same, and
that
I would find
very
disturbing.”

“I have no wish to lose your esteem or good opinion,” he replied in desperation but dared not take the next step and tell her she had been exactly right on the matter of the two being the very same person.

“I cannot be dispassionate when you speak of
His Lordship
. The wrongs he has rendered on his people I cannot forget.”

“No one is asking you to
forget
. Perhaps you can forgive, welcome, and encourage his support in the estate when he offers it.”

“That is so far out of the realm of possibility, I cannot fathom how I would react.”

“Very well. I suppose that is all I can ask is that you
ponder
the supposition of Lord Brent’s presence and his intervention.” Freddie felt satisfied that he had taken the first steps by introducing Lord Brent into their lives. He would move closer to admitting the truth at the next possible moment, when he felt she would no longer spew fire and venom at the mention of his name. There was no doubt he was treading in dangerous territory.

Rosalind glanced skyward. As happy as she was to see Freddie a few minutes earlier, their conversation had taken a downward turn. As far as she was concerned any talk of the Earl of Brent was a waste of time.

Rosalind turned to leave; she needed some air to clear her head . . . calm herself.

“Where are you going?” He sounded puzzled and perhaps he was a bit confused at her cool demeanor.

“I beg your pardon but discussing
that
man upsets me.” She regretted lashing out at him.

“I know. I am sorry.” He neared and rubbed her arms to comfort her. “I have one last item on my agenda but I think you will find this more to your liking. I hope so, anyway.”

“What would that be, sir?” She gazed up at him and it amazed her just how much staring into his face, into the face of the man she loved, calmed her.

Freddie pointedly looked above them, at their position under the mistletoe, and drew her near very slowly to him.

For a kiss . . .

He was going to kiss her. The image of Mr. Trevor kissing Clare surfaced in her mind. The memory caused her face to warm. The thought that she might share the very same kiss with Freddie sent the warmth from her cheeks downward to her neck and spreading to the rest of her body.

He cradled her arm in his and brought her near. He stood so very close she could hear him breathe.

Rosalind felt very strange, a bit dizzy. She had feared she might do something silly such as swoon . . . 
again
. Freddie leaned toward her and placed a lingering, chaste kiss on her cheek. Rosalind’s breath caught at the disappointment at feeling his kiss upon her face and not her lips. That was not the kiss she had dreamed of all afternoon.

Neither moved away from the other but remained close. Although she would not complain, she would take this opportunity to voice her dearest wish.

Rosalind met his unsteady gaze.
What was he thinking? Of her? Of their kiss? Of
another
kiss
,
perhaps?

“Would you
truly
kiss me, Freddie?” she whispered.

Freddie smiled at her request. “I would never wish to take advantage, my dear, but it would be my immense pleasure to do as you ask.”