A Reason to Love (17 page)

T
hree days later, Spence sat flipping through the pages of an outdated sports magazine without really seeing any of the words. Was there some special service that provided doctors, dentists, and lawyers with old magazines? Because if they actually had subscriptions, wouldn’t the newer editions be mixed in with the rest? Maybe there were more important things to worry about, but right now he appreciated the distraction.

He tossed the magazine aside when he heard the click of a door opening down the hall. Sure enough, footsteps were headed his way. When Troy appeared at the entrance to the waiting room, Spence stood up.

The attorney headed straight for him with a welcoming smile on his face. “Thanks for coming in on such short notice, but I knew you wanted to start getting this stuff resolved as soon as possible.”

They shook hands. “Not a problem, Troy. It’s not like I have a lot going on right now.”

Okay, that must have come across more pathetic than he’d meant for it to, because his friend’s smile faltered. “Is everything okay, Spence? Anything I can do?”

“Just helping me wade through all this stuff is help enough. It’s hard to make any kind of plans until I know how it will all play out.”

That was close enough to the truth to satisfy the other man, at least for now. The real problem was that Spence had only one—maybe two—more nights of helping Will with the machinery at the millworks. After that, he had no further commitments, and therefore nothing to occupy his time. Without things to keep him busy, he’d be all alone with his memories. Already his nightmares were getting worse to the point that he was afraid to fall asleep when he was with Melanie for fear of what he might do.

It would be bad enough if he woke up screaming, but what if his screwed-up head told him she was the enemy?

Troy was no fool. If he picked up on how close to the edge Spence was running right now, he might just feel obligated to intervene somehow. The last thing Spence wanted to do was put his friend in that position. He braced himself to get through the next hour by doing his best to act normal. After that, maybe he’d take Mooch for a long run to burn off the tension.

Inside Troy’s private office, he dropped into the chair that faced the two windows that formed the corner of the room. They faced the snowcapped Cascades to the east, which contrasted sharply with the barren mountains in Afghanistan where he’d spent much of the last two years. The panoramic view served as a reminder that he was home and safe, helping him to ignore stark memories of what life had been like over there.

Troy set a thick file on his desk. He pulled out two copies of a document and passed one across to Spence. “I’ve prepared a list for you of what needs to be done and in what order. Your decision on some items will obviously impact others, especially that top one. I’ll give you a few minutes to look it over while I go get us each a cup of coffee.”

Spence glanced up from the paper. “I’ll take mine black.”

The lawyer disappeared out the door. Good thing, too, because right now Spence couldn’t make sense of anything that was written on the page. There was nothing wrong with his eyes; his mind just refused to process the information. He lifted his gaze to stare out the window again and reminded himself how much better he’d feel once he got through with all of this stuff. Once he did, he’d be free to live his life anywhere he chose.

He couldn’t wait.

This time when he looked at the paper, the words shifted into stark clarity. The first line was brutal in its simplicity.
Do you want your house back?

His whole world narrowed down to that one sentence. How the hell was he supposed to figure out the answer to that? Any memories he’d ever had of being happy there living with his folks had dimmed over the years. Far stronger were the hellish ones of existing within those same walls with his uncle and cousin. After he’d kicked their asses to the curb, rattling around in the place by himself hadn’t been any fun, either. It wasn’t until he enlisted in the army that his life had gained any real sense of meaning. Now even that was gone.

Without realizing what he was doing, he’d shredded the paper into pieces. Son of a bitch! He couldn’t do this. Not now. He wadded the pieces into a ball and tossed it in the trash on his way out the door. Troy was just coming down the hall.

“Spence? What’s wrong? Did something happen?”

“No.”

Okay, that was a lie. He tried again. “I can’t answer any of the questions until I figure out the first one. I’m sorry for wasting your time, Troy. I’ll call you as soon as I can come to some sort of decision.”

He kept walking as he spoke, hoping to reach the door before Troy could stop him. No such luck. The other man did an end run to plant himself right in front of Spence. “Okay, I get why that one is a problem for you, Spence, but it’s not going to go away on its own. I would also point out that your friends can’t move forward until you do.”

Spence snapped, “Screw that, Troy. Don’t play the guilt card with me.”

To give Troy credit, he didn’t retreat an inch. “Okay, but I’ll tell you this much. I cannot imagine the hell you’ve been through, but I do realize it’s why you’re having a hard time right now. I’m not pressing for immediate answers, and I’m here for you no matter what. Believe that even if you don’t believe anything else. Having said that, you need to go out there and do a walk-through of the place. Figure out what it means to you, if anything. Even if you don’t want the house itself, there might be a few things inside that you’ll want to keep.”

Troy stared at Spence until he gave in and made eye contact before speaking again. “If you want to do that, I can make sure no one is home when you go out there. Right now it’s hanging over your head like a huge boulder ready to drop at any second. That won’t change until you take control of the situation.”

Okay, Spence got that Troy was trying his best to help. He might even be right. He slowly nodded. “I’ll think about it and let you know.”

The other man looked a bit happier. “Do that. I’ll be waiting to hear from you.”

Outside, Spence climbed on the Harley and started the engine. He wasn’t sure where he was heading, but right now he needed the wind in his face and the sense of freedom the bike gave him. It took some effort, but he honored the speed limit as long as he was in town. But once he cleared the outskirts of Snowberry Creek, he ripped down the two-lane highway, hoping like heck that he wouldn’t run into Gage Logan or any of his deputies.

After an hour of rolling down the highway, he reluctantly took a long, winding route back toward town. He’d enjoyed the ride, but it was impossible to outrun the demons that lived in his head. When he passed Liam’s place, on impulse he hung a U-turn and drove back to the bar. Maybe beer could accomplish what the drive hadn’t.

Inside, the bar was deserted. That was disappointing. He’d been hoping there would be enough people around to provide a welcome distraction.

Liam appeared just as Spence parked his ass on one of the stools at the bar. He immediately reached for a pair of beers and popped the tops. After sliding one across the bar to Spence, he took a long drink from his own.

“Thanks, man, but how did you know this is even what I wanted?”

A quick smile crossed Liam’s face. “Didn’t much care what you wanted. You looked like you needed it.”

Spence laughed and raised the bottle in a mock toast. “Here’s to perceptive bartenders everywhere.”

Liam joined in and clinked his bottle against Spence’s. “Considering it’s not even ten thirty, I’m guessing you’ve had a rough morning.”

“It hasn’t been my best—that’s for sure.” He frowned and shook his head. “A friend is trying to help me deal with some shit, and I acted like a jerk.”

“If he’s a friend, he’ll get over it.”

Spence hoped so. “Yeah, but I swear the list of people I should apologize to never gets any shorter.”

“Common problem, my friend. If it wasn’t, I wouldn’t sell half the beer that I do.” Liam picked up a rag and wiped down the already clean counter. “Are you any good at pool?”

Spence took another swig of his beer, trying to follow the sudden change in topics. “I’ve won my share of games. Why?”

“Because I’m in the mood to play a few rounds, but I don’t have the patience to play with someone who doesn’t know one end of a pool cue from the other.” He tossed the rag back in the sink. “Are you good enough to make it worth my while?”

Spence reached for his wallet and pulled out a twenty and slid it across the counter. “That says I can beat you two out of three.”

Liam picked up the bill and stuffed it in his shirt pocket. He added a second one from the cash drawer. “You’re on.”

As they made their way to the table, Liam’s smile reminded Spence of a shark that had been hunting for some prey and just spotted a sure thing. Well, they’d see about that. Besides, if he did lose, twenty bucks wasn’t much to pay for an attitude adjustment. Afterward, he’d call Troy and apologize for walking out on their appointment.

And if he won, he might just ask him to set up a day and time for him to visit the old homestead. Troy was right. Spence needed to figure out if there was anything left that could anchor him right here in Snowberry Creek. If not, he needed to clear the board, settle his debts, and hit the road.

He nodded at his opponent, who was busy chalking the tip of his cue stick. “It’s your table. Why don’t you break?”

Liam didn’t say a word. He just leaned over the table and sent the balls flying with a sharp flick of his cue. That shark smile was firmly back in place as he lined up his next shot and went to work.

“Green in the corner pocket.”

•   •   •

“I’m sorry, Ms. Wolfe. I wish I had a more encouraging answer for you. You have to believe that I argued long and hard that the bank should help you restructure the company’s finances. I’ve also asked them to take another look at the new figures you sent and reminded them that the Wolfe Millworks was an important part of the economy here in Snowberry Creek.”

Melanie struggled to keep a pleasant expression on her face, but she was losing the battle. She stood to lose more than that if she couldn’t figure out how to convince the bank to reconsider its decision. “So, Mr. Lunt, tell me what I can do to help you convince them.”

His gaze slid away from hers. Either he was lying about his efforts to change their minds or he knew an unpleasant truth behind their decision that he was reluctant to share with her. She had her suspicions what that might be. Mr. Lunt had been nice to her and helpful right up until this meeting, so she hated to put him on the spot. However, unpleasant or not as they might be, she needed all the facts if she was going to make any headway toward saving the company.

It was time to show him she could play hardball. “I’ve provided you with every scrap of information you’ve asked for, good and bad, so I feel as if I’ve been completely honest with you. I would ask you to offer me the same courtesy, Mr. Lunt. What is the real reason the bank is hesitating to approve my application?”

He immediately reached for the glass of water and took a long swallow. After setting it back down, he picked up a pen and started doodling on the scratch pad beside his desk phone. “Okay, if you want complete honesty, here it is. If this were your father asking for the loan, he probably would have gotten it.”

She sat up straighter in her chair and leaned forward. “So I’m being turned down because I’m a woman? I’d be very careful with how you answer that, Mr. Lunt.”

To give the man credit, he looked genuinely horrified by her question. “No, not at all, Ms. Wolfe. Gender has nothing to do with it, but years of experience does. I am impressed by what you’ve accomplished so far, and your plan of action is solid. That’s exactly what I told the committee. However, we owe it to our stockholders to be cautious with the bank’s assets. It would make sense to work with your father to modernize the company because he had decades of experience in the industry. A year from now, when you’ve had a chance to prove yourself, I feel certain that we’d be leaping at the chance to work with you.”

Yeah, but a year from now, there might not be a Wolfe Millworks. She kept that fact to herself. Rather than continue to pound her head against a closed door, Melanie rose to her feet and held her hand out to the banker. “Thank you for your time. Please let me know if you hear anything positive from the committee.”

Feeling proud of her cool, professional demeanor, she smiled at him and walked away. It wasn’t until she was inside her car and driving away that she gave in to the frustration that had been building from the minute she walked into the bank.

Pounding her fist on the steering wheel, she shouted, “Damn, damn, double damn!”

Glancing around, she was relieved to see that the street was deserted. The last thing she wanted was for rumors to start making the rounds that she was losing it. It was late enough that she could call it a day, but she wasn’t ready to face going home yet. Maybe her attitude had more to do with the fact that Spence would be at the factory. She wouldn’t interrupt his work with Mr. Cosgrove, but just knowing he was nearby might help her get through the next few hours.

Sure enough, his Harley was parked in its usual spot. Relieved, she retrieved her briefcase from the backseat and let herself in the back door of the factory. Several of the men were standing just inside, Spence among them. Their expressions were grim. That they fell silent when she walked in meant they were talking about her.

She smiled and nodded as she passed them and started upstairs. At the top, she hesitated before turning in the direction of her office and glanced back down to see what the group was doing now. In that short time, they’d scattered like cockroaches when a light came on. The only one left standing there was Spence. He offered her a sympathetic look and mouthed the word “later” before disappearing toward the front of the factory.

She let herself into her office and sat down in the oversized executive chair her father had preferred. For a moment, she flashed back to when she was a little girl and would play at his desk whenever she and her mom dropped by to visit her father at work. Back then, sitting there had been an adventure. Now it was a burden. And yet feeling sorry for herself wouldn’t help anyone. Far better to prove Mr. Lunt’s committee and everyone else who doubted her wrong. With that in mind, she started making a list of banks she could try next.