A Story of Now (14 page)

But she feels his quiet concern sometimes. And he looks at her, too, with a fondness tempered by a mild helplessness. It’s as if he’s not quite sure what to do with this alien person he’s raised, someone so unsure of who she wants to be. Because of the quiet but unflinching way he cares and never questions, she doesn’t want him to worry about her.

“Don’t study too hard.” He leaves her to it and goes back to his work.

She sits a while longer and listens to the sounds of him working as she absorbs the last warmth of the sun. The phone in her pocket beeps, and she pulls it out. It’s Mia.

Hey, are you working tonight? Robbie and I were thinking of coming in for a drink after work…

She feels a flash of guilt because she didn’t answer Mia’s last message earlier in the week. Even though she’d like to see her, Claire is glad she isn’t working because she’s nervous to see Robbie. What if Nina told him about what happened? That would be completely embarrassing. She quickly types a response.
Not tonight. See you soon, though
.

“Hey, Dad, I’m going inside.” She dusts down the back of her jeans as she gets up from the step and waits a beat for his response. But he doesn’t hear her over the sound of his hammering.

CHAPTER 19

“Dude, that’s rough.” Cam shakes his head and wipes froth from his upper lip.

She spins her cup on its saucer and frowns. “Yup.”

“Have you spoken to her since?”

“Nope. Won’t answer my calls.”

He shakes his head. “Girls are weird.”

“That’s what I keep saying.”

That’s when his phone starts ringing. Again. He picks it up, turns a little from the table, and listens hard. His face shifts immediately to serious. As she waits for him to be done with his third work call during their brief coffee date, she turns and looks around the café. It is less busy than the first couple of times she’s been there, with just half the tables full. The waiters stand around the counter and chat instead of running around, frantic, like they usually do. And Mia is toiling away behind the machine, a small frown of concentration on her face as she works. She doesn’t seem to have noticed Claire is there.

“Crap, I’ve got to go. Sorry, sis.” Cam tucks his phone into his back pocket and pulls on his jacket. “Work.”

Claire nods, long resigned to these constant work interruptions. This is the story of her life, her family jumps ship every time work calls. “Great to see you for, what, twenty minutes?”

“I’m sorry.” He squeezes her shoulder. “And I’m sorry about what happened with your friend. That sucks. Anyway, thanks for showing me where the hipsters drink their coffee.” He grins. “I’ll see you later.”

She gives him a sarcastic wave. When she finishes her coffee, she makes her way to Mia. Claire waits a beat as Mia presses a lid onto a takeaway cup and passes it to a customer, and then she steps forward.

“Hey.” She leans against the counter and smiles.

Mia looks up, surprised. “Oh hey.” She’s clearly a little flustered by Claire’s sudden appearance.

“How are you?” Claire asks, slightly thrown by Mia’s reaction.

Mia flashes a glimmer of a smile and then returns to frowning over the coffee machine. “I’m okay.”

Claire wonders if she shouldn’t be bothering her at work. She pushes herself away from the counter, suddenly feeling awkward. “I was just going to see if you had a break coming, but you look a little busy. I’ll leave you to it.”

“Oh, no, it’s…um…yeah.” Mia pours milk into a shot of coffee and quickly glances at Claire, her eyebrows knitted. Then she takes a breath and smiles. “I might be able to in, like, ten minutes? But you probably don’t want to wait around,” she adds hurriedly.

“No, it’s totally fine. Come join me whenever.”

Claire returns to her seat. She still feels uncomfortable, as if she shouldn’t be here, but she’s committed now. She thumbs through a magazine left in the middle of the table and idly looks at pictures until Mia arrives with a coffee in her hands. A big coffee this time, Claire notes as Mia parks herself on the stool opposite Claire.

“I can only take ten minutes. The boss wants us to pack up early because it’s quiet, and she has a hair appointment she ‘simply can’t be late for.’” She rolls her eyes.

“That’s okay.” Claire closes the magazine and pushes it away. “Should I not talk to you while you’re working?

“What? No, of course it’s fine. I was just somewhere else when you came up.”

“Oh good. I wanted to say hi. Sorry I didn’t get back to you when you messaged the first time. It was a…weird week.”

“That’s okay.” Mia stares at her coffee. “I didn’t mean to bother you or anything. You’re probably busy with other stuff, I shouldn’t—”

“What?” Claire reaches over and prods her in the arm, surprised by Mia’s response. “No. You weren’t bothering me. Why would you think that? Like I said, it was just a weird week, and I really wasn’t fit for human consumption. I didn’t think anyone should have to put up with me.”

“Is everything okay?”

“Yeah, fine,” Claire fibs, because Mia heard enough about her personal dramas last time they saw each other. She doesn’t need to hear any more, especially on her break. “How was your week?”

“It was okay.”

Claire looks for something to talk about and comments, “It’s quiet.”

“Yes, thank God. It’s was busy all morning.”

“And how’s Pete? Not that I am being nosy,” she hurriedly adds as she remembers Mia’s slight caginess the last couple of times Claire brought him up. “I just mean, you know, he seems like a nice guy, and I’m wondering how he’s…” She trails off.

Mia smiles at her mini rant. “He’s okay, I think. I haven’t really seen him much lately.” She picks up her spoon and stirs slow circles into her coffee. “I ended it with him, actually.”

“What? Really?” Claire leans in, surprised. They seemed so easy and fun together at the opening. “How come—if you don’t mind me asking, of course.”

“I don’t know.” Mia shrugs. “It just didn’t feel right. I think I just want to be friends.”

“Fair enough. You know how you feel.”

Mia nods but doesn’t say anything.

“Did he take it okay?” Claire asks the question tentatively, not quite sure where to tread with Mia and her personal life.

“I think so. He made like it was okay, but it was kind of hard to tell.”

“Guys love to be all cool about this stuff, don’t they?”

“I guess.”

“Will you really still be friends?”

“I hope so.” Mia rests her cheek in her hand. “He’s one of the genuinely fun people in my course. I mean, everyone’s nice and stuff, but they can be kind of…socially limited.”

“He’ll be fine,” Claire says in an attempt to lighten Mia’s mood. “He’ll find some other hot science geek to hook up with and get over it, and then you and he can be friends. But don’t feel bad. It’s not like you did anything wrong.”

“I don’t know. Maybe I’m a horrible person. I should have figured it out before.”

“I don’t know you that well yet, but I bet you’re not a horrible person.” Claire pokes her in the arm again. “And I bet you weren’t horrible about it when you told him. Besides, it would be worse to keep pretending if you don’t feel it.”

“I guess.” Mia frowns for a minute as she plays idly with a knot on the wooden tabletop. She seems really low.

Claire leans forward. “Hey, are you okay?”

“Yeah,” Mia finally replies. She gives Claire a watery smile. “I’m just a bit…I don’t know. There’s this thing with Pete, then exams are coming, and I have a heap of work to do, and remember how I told you about Robbie’s disappearing acts?”

Claire nods.

“He’s doing one of those. I’m just feeling a little overwhelmed, I guess.”

Claire bites her lip and looks at her for a minute, not quite sure what to do with this slightly down, stressed version of Mia. This is the first time she’s seen her less than together. And while she feels bad for Mia because she’s clearly had a shitty week, part of her is a teensy, selfishly bit glad to see Mia isn’t always
so
upbeat and at ease.

“Hey, it’s okay, you know. You did the right thing with Pete. And I’ll bet you’ll kill your exams. There’s still a few weeks and then study break. Heaps of time.” She drops her hand on Mia’s wrist and squeezes it until Mia looks up at her. “Just breathe, okay?” she tells her, because that’s the only advice she knows to give.

Obediently, Mia takes in a big breath and lets it out, shimmying her shoulders as if shaking it off, and then gives Claire a near-perfect
I’m okay
smile. “Was that guy who was here before your brother by any chance?” she asks, changing the subject.

“Yup, that was the sibling. I thought I’d take him for a decent coffee. He’ll drinks crap all day and then complain about it. I thought I’d show him it isn’t that hard to find a decent one near his work.”

Mia glances at her watch. “Damn, I have to go back already.” She picks up her cup. “But thanks for coming and saying hi. And I’m sorry I’m such a mope.”

“You don’t have to say thanks or sorry. You heard all of my woes last week. It’s totally your turn.”

“Thanks for letting me have my turn. I’ll see you soon?”

“For sure. See you.”

Claire waves, glad to see her feeling even a teensy bit better as Mia heads back behind the counter for the rest of her shift. Maybe she’s not as shitty a friend as some people seem to think.

CHAPTER 20

This is not what Claire had pictured, not at all.

This party, in this apartment, with these people? Nope, this is not what she expected. Robbie invited her via text message halfway through her shift to demand her attendance. She stands in the open doorway. All she can think is these people don’t look like the kind of people Robbie would hang out with. And they look nothing like the kind of people who were at his exhibition party either. The effort gone into this night, with the decorations, food, and even a DJ, makes it look more like a party that her old, moneyed, school friends might have held—albeit in a much cooler inner city apartment.

As she takes in this scene, she wonders what the hell she’s doing here with the kind of people she’s been avoiding lately. As she pulls off her jacket, she searches the room for a familiar face, feeling completely and utterly adrift. She’s nervous to walk right in without the security of a destination and really wishes everything hadn’t gone to hell with Nina. At least then she’d have her here.

But there’s no point wishing that. Claire only came to this party because she knows Nina won’t be here. It’s the week of Nina’s big trip home, and that’s what gave Claire the freedom to finish work, change her top, reapply makeup, and head for the address Robbie sent. If Nina had been in town, unspoken social rules dictate that this party falls into Nina’s friendship territory. Claire would have to back off.

She takes a few steps in and pauses by a generously laden food table and scans the crowd. She feels an almost embarrassing surge of relief when she spots Mia on the other side of the room. Relieved, Claire makes an instant beeline for her.

She’s leaning against the kitchen counter, chatting with Pete, holding a beer, and laughing. She’s wearing what Claire has come to think of as Mia’s uniform. The look never changes. A top or a tank or maybe a shirt if it’s cooler. Always simple but in colour or with a small, interesting detail. Jeans. Always jeans. Always blue. Boots. Her hair down, tangled loose around her shoulders, unless she’s studying, and then it’s always tied back. She never wears earrings or bracelets, but there is often a pendant hanging from the long silver chain. Like her personality, her sense of fashion has only one setting—effortlessly casual as if she doesn’t have time to care about how she looks. It doesn’t even matter. Guys still notice her. It’s not just that she’s attractive but because she’s also approachable and fun. There’s a vitality about her. She seems as though she’ll give a minute of her day to anyone, unless the other person proves not worth it.

Claire wishes she had that kind of ease, but even when she’s at her most confident, she doesn’t. She never will. She doesn’t have it in her personality or in her style. She doesn’t know how to leave the house without looking as if she’s made an effort, without at least the protective barrier of eyeliner and a carefully chosen outfit. Even tonight, she spent a good twenty minutes touching up her makeup and hair before she felt she could go out among people without the distance of the bar between herself and the world. She envies Mia’s ability to easily exist without all the trimmings. And it’s just plain unfair that she’s still so lovely without them.

As Claire fights her way through the crowd, she exchanges dirty looks with underfed girls swaying on the fringes of the dance floor. Mia spots her and waves when she emerges on the kitchen side of the room. She looks a hell of a lot happier than she did a week ago at the café.

Claire raises her hands and gives her a frowning why-the-hell-are-we-here look as she closes the distance between them.

“I know, right?”

“Where’s Robbie?” Claire leans on the counter next to her. “I demand answers.”

“He’s not here yet. He just messaged me to say he’s not far. Thanks goodness for these guys.” Mia nods at Pete and his friend, a short guy in a cap. “They promised to wait until he got here.”

“This is really not my scene.” Pete shakes his head. “In fact, this might be what my personal hell looks like.” His friend nods in ardent agreement. “Now that Claire’s here, can we go?” He smiles at Claire. “No offence, you understand?”

Claire laughs. “None taken at all.”

He then turns back to Mia, broadening the grin. It seems he’s taking their split pretty well. Well enough to hang out with her at least.

“You can go.” Mia grabs his arm and laughs. “Thank you for waiting with me.”

“No problem. Thanks for the party. The, uh, the walking here part was fun.” He grins at Mia and gives Claire a wave. “See you.”

“Bye.”

They make their rapid exit through the crowd.

Mia faces Claire and smiles. “I didn’t know you were coming. It’s good to see you.”

“The jury’s out on whether I’m glad to be here.”