A Stranger in the Mirror (30 page)

282 Jill hesitated a moment, then followed him, filled with some nameless, growing dread. She peered over the railing. Far below on the water, she could see David getting on tile pilot tug, .leaving the Bretagne. She clutched the railing for support. "Why?" she demanded unbelievingly. "What happened?" Clifton Lawrence turned to her and said, "I ran your picture for him." And she instantly knew what he meant and she moaned, "Oh, my God. No! Please, no! You've killed.mel" "Then we're even." "Get out!" she screamed. "Get out of here!" She flung herself at him and her nails caught his cheeks and ripped deep gashes down the side. Clifton swung and hit her hard across the face. She fell to her knees, clutching her head in agony. Clifton stood looking at her for a long moment. This was how he wanted to remember her. "So long, Josephine Czinski," he said. Clifton left Jill's cabin and walked up to the boat deck, keeping the lower half of his face covered with the handkerchief. He walked slowly, studying the faces of the passengers, looking for a fresh face, an unusual type. You never knew when you might stumble across new talent. He felt ready to go back to work again. Who could tell? Maybe he would get lucky and discover another Toby Temple.

Shortly after Clifton left, Claude Dessard walked up to Jill's cabin and knocked at the door. There was no response, but the chief purser could hear sounds inside the room. He waited a moment, then raised his voice and said, "Mrs. Temple, this is Claude Dessard, the chief purser. I was wondering if I might be of service?" , There was no answer. By now Dessard's internal warning system was screaming. His instincts told him that there was something terribly wrong, and he had a premonition that it centered, somehow, around this woman. A series of wild, outrageous thoughts danced through his brain. She had been

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urdered or kidnapped or -- He tried the handle of the door. was unlocked. Slowly, Dessard pushed die door open, Jill anple was standing at the far end of the cabin, looking out e porthole, her back to him. Dessard opened his mouth to eak, but something in the frozen rigidity of the figure stopped m. He stood there awkwardly for a moment, debating icther to quietly withdraw, when suddenly the cabin was led with an unearthly, keening sound, like an animal in pain. elpless before such a deep private agony, Dessard withdrew, refully closing the door behind him. Dessard stood outside the cabin a moment, listening to e Wordless cry from within, then, deeply disturbed, turned id headed for the theater on the main deck.

At dinner that evening, there were two empty seats at e captain's table. Halfway through the meal, the captain yialed to Dessard, who was hosting a party of less important ssengers two tables away. Dessard excused himself and irried over to the captain's table. "Ah, Dessard," the captain said, genially. He lowered his ice and his tone changed. "What happened with Mrs. anple and Mr. Kenyon?" Dessard looked around at the other guests and whispered, }s you know, Mr. Kenyon left with the pilot at the Ambrose ghtship. Mrs. Temple is in her cabin." The captain swore under his breath. He was a methodical an who did not like to have his routine interfered with. ^terde! All the wedding arrangements have been made," !said. "I know, Captain." Dessard shrugged and rolled his eyes ward. "Americans," he said.

Jill sat alone in the darkened cabin, huddled in a chair, r knees pulled up to her chest, staring into nothingness. ie was .gaeving, but it was not for David Kenyon or Toby anple of^ssea for herself. She was grieving for a little girl med Josephine CzinsH. Jill had wanted to do so much for at little girl, and now all the wonderful magical dreams she d had for her were finished.

284 Jill sat there, unseeing, numbed by a defeat that was beyond comprehension. Only a few hours ago she had owned the world, she had everything she ever wanted, and now she had nothing. She became slowly aware that her headache had returned. She had not noticed it before because of the o&er pain, the agonizing pain that was tearing deep into her bowels. But now she could feel the band around her forehead tightening. She pulled her knees up closer against her chest, in the fetal position, trying to shut out everything. She was so tired, so terribly tired. All she wanted to do was to sit here forever and not have to think. Then maybe the pain would stop, at least for a little while. Jill dragged herself over to the bed and lay down and closed her eyes. "Hen she felt it. A wave of cold, foul-smelling air moving toward her, surrounding her, caressing her. And she heard his voice, calling her name. Yes, she thought, yes. Slowly, almost in a trance, Jill got to her feet and walked out of her cabin, following the beckoning voice in her head.

If was two o'clock in the morning and the decks were deserted when Jill emerged from her cabin. She stared down at the sea, watching the gentle splashing of the waves against the ship as it cut through the water, listening to the voice. Jill's headache was worse now, a tight vise of agony. But the voice was telling her not to worry, telling her that, everything was going to be fine. Look down, the voice said. Jill looked down into the water and saw something floating there. It was a face. Toby's face, smiling at her, the drowned blue eyes looking up at her. The icy breeze began to blow, gently pushing her closer to the rail. "I had to do it, Toby," she whispered. "You see that, don't you?" The head in the water was nodding, bobbing, inviting her to come and join it. The wind grew colder and Jill's body began trembling. Don't be afraid, the voice told her. The water is deep and warm.... You'll be here with me.... Forever. Come, Jill. She closed her eyes a moment, but when she opened

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than, .the smiling face was still there, keeping pace with the ship, the mutilated limbs dangling in the water. Come to me, the voice said. She leaned over to explain to Toby, so that he would leave her in peace, and the icy wind pushed against her, and suddenly she was floating in the soft velvet night air, pirouetting inspace. Toby's face was coming closer, coming to meet her, and she felt the paralyzed arms go around her body, holding her. And they were together, forever and ever. Then there was only the soft night wind and the timeless sea. And the stars above, where it had all been written.

ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS

I wish to express my appreciation for their generous assistance to the following motion picture and television producers: Seymour Bems Larry Gdbart Bert Granet Harvey Orldn Matty Racldn David Swift Robert Weitman

And my deep gratitude for sharing with me their memories and experiences goes to:

Marty Alien Milton Berle Red Buttons George Burns Jack Carter Buddy Hackett Groucho Marx Jan Murray . the author

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