He blinked, his long lashes sweeping downward. “I wasn’t going to bring this up yet, because I don’t want to send you running.” A slight twinge of indecision colored his tone, his features. “But maybe I should, just to clear the air.”
“Um, Ethan? It’s okay. You don’t have to say anything.”
The indecision fled. “Actually, it’s better if I do, even if I hadn’t planned on it. Just promise me you won’t run until I say it all.”
“I won’t run, Ethan. What is it?” I tried to sound confident. I was sure I failed.
“My feelings for you are stronger than I anticipated.” Shaking his head, as if trying to clear a daze, he continued, “I’ve only felt this way once before, and that didn’t end as I’d hoped. I just want to make sure we’re on the same path here.”
“And that path is going where?” I probably shouldn’t have asked, because it was my stupidly thought wish that had started this conversation, but I couldn’t help myself. I wanted to know. I needed to know.
Smoky eyes steadily held mine. “I can’t answer that yet, because neither of us knows what the future holds. But Alice? I’m not interested in other women. I’m only interested in you, and moving forward, and seeing what the future is.” His hand played with my hair. “But you’re about to become a mother, and your life is going to change quickly.”
“And you’re worried about what, exactly?” Maybe the baby was a deal breaker. I couldn’t blame him if so, but if that was the case, I needed to find out before my heart became further entangled. Before I made any decisions.
“I’m not asking you to make any promises. I just want to know that, right now, I’m the man you want to spend time with.” I must have looked perplexed, because he sighed. “Let me try this again. Are you dating anyone else right now?”
At first, a blast of happiness made me more than a little dizzy. Ethan wanted to be with me as much as I wanted to be with him! I opened my mouth to tell him just that, but out of nowhere, Kyle came to mind. Did he count as someone I was dating? Ugh. Not really. Not yet, anyway. But what if that changed?
Deciding to answer the question he’d asked, I said, “At the moment, you’re the only man I’m dating. The only man I even want to date.” Even though that was the truth, I felt as if I’d lied.
Still, the worry in his gaze disappeared. “I want you to be happy. I hope I make you happy.”
“You do.” My own worries eased away. In any other circumstance, where a warning from a long-dead relative wasn’t in play, I’d be head over heels by now. Maybe the best thing I could do was grab hold and trust my instincts.
“Come here,” he growled. His hands tugged at my waist, and he pulled me toward him. I took things a step further, pivoting my body so I was sitting on his lap, my legs on either side of his, facing him. Exactly where I wanted to be.
One of his hands came up behind me, his fingers threading through my hair, pushing my head forward. His other hand rested on my back. Our lips met, and just like before, everything else melted away. All my worries, thoughts about soul mates, magical mishaps, and the rest of it evaporated. Ethan’s scent wrapped around me, intoxicating. How could this be wrong? And even if it were, I wasn’t so sure I cared.
His tongue teased at my mouth, plunging in, pulling me deeper into his kiss. The taste of him, the feel of his erection against me sent a wave of desire rolling through my body, so strong and so fast, my head spun. Everything about this man resonated with me, and I didn’t think, I just reacted. My hand tugged his shirt up so I could feel his skin—which was warm, solid, and way too enticing.
Knowing I was only a few seconds from ripping his shirt all the way off, I groaned and pulled my mouth from his. Resting my cheek on his chest, I heard his heart beating as fast as my own. Our breaths came in ragged, uneven rasps, and his arms closed around me, locking me to him. Neither of us spoke for a while; we just stayed like that, pressed tightly together, waiting for the moment to calm.
And that was the second I knew something I’d been ignoring for weeks: I was more than attracted to Ethan Gallagher. Somewhere inside, on a gut level, I recognized him. And yeah, I was absolutely positive I was falling in love. Because this feeling? It beat the crap out of what I’d felt for Troy after a full year. Hell, it made all of my other relationships combined seem like a joke.
I was
this
close to tossing the warning aside, to letting myself fall in love, when my daughter kicked. And in that small, barely felt kick, all of my fears came rushing back. I was going to be a mother. I owed my daughter the best I could give her, and if for some reason Ethan wasn’t that, what did that make me? Selfish. It made me selfish.
Separating myself from Ethan’s embrace, I scooted to the side, my eyes not meeting his. Instead, they fell on his arm. At some point, in the midst of our kiss, his sleeve had gotten pulled up, and just below his elbow, on the inside of his arm, was a tiny white scar. “I thought you only had one scar,” I blurted, my fingers touching the mark.
“Hmm? Oh, that? One of many accidents from my youth. I think that one was from tossing rocks with my friends.”
“Tossing rocks?” I said lightly, barely daring to hope. “Grandma Verda said something about you only having one scar. On your leg? From glass or something.”
“What? Oh, that’s right. We had a rather strange discussion about scars and childhood injuries. I only told her the one story because I was on my way out to meet with a client.” Then, as if he realized how odd our current conversation was, he paused. “Are you against scars?”
Relief flooded me. “Oh, not at all! I’m…curious. So, you have lots of scars?”
Humor edged his words. “I wouldn’t say lots. Three or four, maybe. Why are you so curious?”
My mind flashed through all the answers I could give, but I came up blank. Remembering something my sister had said, I went with, “Scars turn me on. You know, they’re hot…and dangerous…and sexy.” I sounded like a loon, but so what? He had more scars. One could be on his shoulder!
“Every time we have a conversation, I learn a little more about how your mind works. And each and every time, it backs up my first conclusion of you.”
“Oh yeah? What was that?”
“Funny, beautiful—and quite unique.”
Leaning against him, I smiled. “Unique is good.” There were more things about Ethan I wanted to know, but I let them slide away. Because sitting there felt so good, so right, that regardless of what happened in the future, it was a memory to cherish. No way, no how, was I going to screw it up.
“I wish to draw a picture of Kyle’s wedding day,” I murmured. Maybe, just maybe, it would happen and then I could cancel my lunch meeting with him; after yesterday’s date with Ethan, the image of sitting across from Kyle Ackers for an entire hour didn’t fill me with joy.
Nothing happened. Not even a zip of energy floated into me. But instead of becoming frustrated, I considered what I knew about the magic. Next, I pulled the limited knowledge I had about precognition together in my mind, which was basically nothing more than what Chloe had shared. That thread from earlier still existed, teasing me, skimming the edge of my awareness. I was absolutely missing something. But what?
Setting Kyle aside for now, I thought about Ethan. Drawing his future scared me, because if I weren’t in it, I’d be crushed. I’d have no choice then but to seriously consider other alternatives. And while the intelligent way to proceed would be to gather that information as soon as possible, I couldn’t do it. Not yet. Eventually I might not have any choice but to give that a shot, but for now I was skipping it.
Okay, so if I was too chicken to go down that road, what about Chloe’s? There were similarities between her and Elizabeth. For one, I cared deeply about both of them. For two, both were going through emotional upheaval in their lives.
Excitement surged inside of me. I was close. So very close. The pieces suddenly seemed to click into place, and the end result was definitely something that made sense. So much so, I almost laughed. I’d been thinking too hard about things. The truth was so simple, I couldn’t believe I hadn’t realized it before: however my magic worked, it had something to do with my connection to the person, and to something they were experiencing at the time.
But was I right? No time like the present to find out.
Gripping my pencil, I thought of Chloe and how much she meant to me. I considered everything she was going through, and how much she needed answers. “I wish to draw a picture of Chloe and the man she marries,” I whispered. The words had barely left my mouth before a swirl of electricity began at my toes. It curled through my body like wildfire, and in an instant, my pencil was moving across the page.
Oh my God. I’d hoped for this, but I hadn’t actually thought it would happen. Lights and colors danced around me, around the pencil, just like with Elizabeth’s drawing. The power whipped through the air, forceful and solid. And then, out of nowhere, a strong blast of wind hit my face. Okay, that was a new one. The magic undulated through my veins, and as it did, my pencil continued to draw, to shade, to put in detail where none had existed.
Chloe came into focus first. Her hair was longer, gently sweeping across her shoulders. Her eyes were large, luminous, and her happiness shone through. She wore an informal dress that stopped at the top of her knees. And even though it was just a picture, I could almost see how the dress moved around her like flowing silk. She held a large bouquet of flowers in her hands, and a small crown sat on top of her head as if she were a princess—and the pure beauty of the love I saw in her eyes stole my breath.
Then it was time to draw the man standing next to her. Would it be Kyle? Scot? Someone else entirely? I didn’t know what to hope for, because while seeing Kyle as her groom would give me a huge amount of peace, I didn’t think he was the man for her any more than I thought he was the man for me. Still unable to breathe, I watched the pencil strokes become smaller, sketching in the fine details of the man’s hair, eyes, nose, mouth, jaw…
In a giant rush, the energy burst through me one last time and evaporated. The colors disappeared, the wind stopped blowing, and my hand ceased to move. I stared at the picture, and a tremble not caused by magic crawled along my skin. This drawing was a close-up, featuring only the bride and groom. I couldn’t see any of the room in which they stood, or any of the people around them. They took center stage. And the groom? He wasn’t Kyle. He wasn’t Scot, either. Rather, the handsome man smiling back at me from the page was a complete stranger. At least to me.
Wow. I didn’t really feel disappointment it wasn’t Kyle, because with Chloe beaming so brightly, how could I possibly be disappointed? Tears dotted my eyes. One blink and they cascaded down my cheeks in a hot rush. My friend was going to find her ever after, and I so couldn’t wait for the day—the one right in front of me—to actually happen.
With a shaky hand, I reached for the phone. I needed to tell her, right now, so she could come over here and see for herself. She had to see the man, her husband, with her own eyes, so she knew not to focus on Kyle, or to worry about him any longer. But before I could dial the numbers, Miranda shimmered in front of me. No lights or colors, just her glimmering shape, not quite solid.
With a flick of her hand, my phone tumbled to the ground. “You can’t show her this yet, Alice.”
I frowned. “Why not? She needs to know, and it will make her so happy.”
“Because she’s not ready. If you show her this now, everything inside of her will be intent on finding him, but it’s not the right time for them yet. And if she is able to find him now, this path will alter. It will change from the happy day you drew. You don’t want to do that to your friend, do you?”
“You mean it won’t happen? If she somehow tracks him down tomorrow, this day I just drew will never occur?” My chin dipped downward. I took in the drawing again, and my heart ached.
“That’s exactly what I mean.” Suddenly, Miranda was next to me. “Be very careful.”
Anger and sadness collided. “Why do I even have this power? If I can’t show it to those people I draw?” I so wanted to give Chloe this picture, but of course I wouldn’t. Not if doing so would erase her glorious day.
“All power, all magic, has…hmm, what’s the right word—Side effects? Repercussions?—if not used correctly. The magic is changing, and part of your magic is exactly what you’ve guessed. You have the power to see glimpses of the future, but you’ll need to learn how to use those glimpses appropriately. I’ll help you, and you will learn. I promise.”
Understanding what she said didn’t make it easier to take. “What about the wishes? Is that me or the baby?”
“A little of both. You have some power with wishes, more with the presence of your daughter. It will grow as she grows.”
God. Chloe had basically been right about that too. Smart lady, my friend. “Okay then, what about
Elizabeth’s
picture? Can I show her?”
A ghost of a smile touched Miranda’s lips. “Yes. Because the steps to achieving that future have already begun. She might not want to know, though, so be careful before you show her.”
Holding up the sketchpad, I stared at Chloe’s beaming face again. It was there; I could see it—all of her dreams about love were going to come true. “When can I show her?”
Miranda sighed. “You’ll know when. Trust me on this, Alice. When the moment arrives, you won’t doubt it. If there is doubt, it’s not the right time.” And then, in her normal annoying way, she hazed out of my living room without another word.
“Come back! I want to talk to you about Ethan,” I half shouted. Nothing. “Please?” Still nothing.
Honestly, if she weren’t my great-great-great-grandmother, I’d have cursed the day she was born. Freaking ghost, blipping in and out with a mishmash of advice, warnings, and whatnot, but nothing real. Nothing tangible to give me what I needed to know.
Of course, that was probably because she couldn’t tell me. Otherwise, just like Chloe, my happily ever after might never occur. And wow, I so wanted that future.
Very carefully, I ripped the Chloe picture out of my sketchbook and put it away, high up in my closet. For now, at least, I’d have to forget it existed, even if it went against every bone in my body. Me and Chloe? We’d never kept secrets. We’d never had anything we couldn’t share. This was a first, in more ways than one. I hated it.
Deciding I needed some company, I figured a visit to my sister’s would do the trick. Grabbing my sketchbook, I headed out the door without a backward glance. I hoped sharing her drawing with her would lift my spirits.
An hour later, I was at Elizabeth’s place. We were seated on her couch in her tiny living room. And I do mean tiny. Elizabeth’s apartment was about half the size of mine.
“I baked brownies yesterday. Do you want one?” She hadn’t yet asked what I was doing there unannounced, but the question loomed between us.
“No, thanks. How are you? You didn’t sound like yourself the other day.” I eased in, trying to take the conversation slowly.
A wide smile broke. “Is that what this is about? I’m sorry I worried you. My past caught up with me, and I began to worry the same thing might happen again. But Nate’s different, and what we have is special. I’m okay now.”
“You’re the happiest I’ve seen you in years. And I like Nate a lot.” My eyes whisked over her apartment, which she’d completely redecorated not that long ago. It was stylish and chic, but homey too. Exactly right for my sister. “I still need to paint you a portrait. Maybe as a wedding gift…” I let the words trail off.
Her gaze narrowed. “Wedding gift? What are you talking about?”
“Um. Well, I have it on good authority—”
Before I could finish my sentence, she leaned over and lightly smacked her hand over my mouth. “No, Alice. If you know something like that—I don’t want to hear. Let me be surprised if and when it happens.”
Damn. There went that thought. I nodded, and she removed her hand. “I don’t know anything for sure,” I lied. “Mostly, I was prodding. You’ll tell me right away if he proposes, right? Like, immediately? I’ve just been thinking about your situation and it seemed to make sense.”
“Of course I’ll tell you! Right now, I think we’re good where we are. We might move in together soon, though. It seems wasteful for both of us to keep paying rent when we live right next door.”
“Will you move to his apartment or will he move here?”
“No idea. I’d prefer here after all the work I’ve done on the place, but what’s important is being with the person you love. I’ll go wherever.” A light of knowledge danced into her brown eyes. “What’s going on with you? Making any headway on the soul mate front?”
“Not really. Ethan and I had a date yesterday. It was really nice.” Biting my lip, I asked a question I hadn’t planned on: “How did you know you’d fallen in love with Nate?”
“That serious already? That must have been some date.”
I gave my sister a glare. “Just answer. How’d you know?”
She shrugged, some of her chestnut hair falling into her eyes. Whisking it away, she said, “I can’t answer that. I just…knew.”
“That’s no help! Can’t you be more exact?”
I must have looked as miserable as I felt, because she squeezed my hand. “Aw, sweetie. Trust me. You’ll know. When it comes right down to it, you won’t have a question or a bit of doubt; your entire being will sing with the knowledge.”
Weird, really, how her answer about love and Miranda’s about magic were so very similar. Heck, it was even a little eerie. “Yeah. I’ve been hearing a lot of that lately.”
“Come on. Let’s get a brownie and a big glass of milk, and you can tell me all about your date. Sound good?”
“Yeah. I’d like that.” And then, together, we talked it out over chocolate.
By the time I left, I was in a better frame of mind. If what Elizabeth said was true, then maybe I already had my soul mate question answered. Of course, a stupid little inner voice reminded me that, no matter how strong my feelings for Ethan were, it did not mean he was the man in my drawing. But that little voice? It pissed me off, so I tuned it out.
I waited for Kyle in a window booth at a local hamburger joint a few blocks away from Enchanted Expressions. I wasn’t sure what I was going to glean from this meeting, but I hoped something would come out that would settle the Kyle-as-soul-mate subject once and for all.
When he loped into the restaurant, I saw him immediately. Today, he wore casual dress slacks, a tucked-in long-sleeved shirt, and a tie. A flutter of surprise had me taking a closer look. Dressed like this, he was actually fairly handsome, even with his apparently trademark sunglasses pushed up on his head. His gaze landed on me and he gave a small, tight smile.
Sliding into the seat across from me, he tipped his head in greeting. “Hey, Alice. Have you been waiting long?”
“No. Thanks for meeting me. I appreciate it.”
The waitress stopped at our table, delivering two glasses of water and two menus. After she zipped away, Kyle opened his menu, his long fingers tilting it upright so I couldn’t quite see his entire face. My stomach hurt, probably from the tension emanating off of Kyle. It appeared we were equally unhappy with this get-together. I knew what caused my stress, but I wondered what caused his.
As I watched him, I tried to imagine being with him the way I was with Ethan, but the image wouldn’t take. It wasn’t that I found him distasteful, because I didn’t. Especially now that I knew more about him. There just weren’t any sparks, any energy, any
anything
between us.
He set his menu down, and a hint of irritation existed in the way he sat, in his stiffly held shoulders. “What did you want to see me for?” he finally asked, his voice calm but abrupt.
“Um. Well, we’re both friends with Shelby and Grant. And Chloe. I thought it might be nice to get to know each other a little better, that’s all.”
His eyes skittered to the window and then back to me. Instead of the casual, even funny Kyle I’d seen at Shelby’s, this Kyle was all about business. “This is probably a really rough time for you, isn’t it? Being pregnant and the father skipping out and all. I’m sorry you’re going through that.”
“It hasn’t been easy,” I agreed, once again surprised.
“And you’d probably like to find someone else. Another man or…well…even a woman if you go that way, to help you out a little. I get that. I do.” Fidgeting, he played with his napkin-wrapped silverware. “Do you go that way? Or are you set on finding a man? Maybe I can fix you up with some people, if you tell me what you’re looking for. There’re a couple of divorced guys at work who are seriously into the daddy scene.”