A Test of Faith (2 page)

The
Farmer

“Listen! A farmer went out to
plant some seed …”
M
ARK
4:3

one

IT WAS TIME.

Anne savored the moment. Pain didn’t matter. Fear was nonexistent. All she felt was joy. Deep, overwhelming joy. She couldn’t stop the grin that spread across her features.

But then, she didn’t want to.

She’d waited so long. Despite the doctor’s dire warnings, she’d known this was right. Known it was God’s call to her. And so she prayed, begged, threw herself at God’s feet. And now…

“Jared.” She meant to whisper his name, but it came out in a sharp groan.

His eyes opened, and he sat up in the bed. “What? Where?”

Anne’s grin broadened at the rapid, caught-in-the-headlights blink of his eyes as he fought his way through the fog of deep sleep. With his hair askew and the imprint of the wrinkled pillow on his cheek, he looked like a little boy waking from a nap. His fists clutched the bedsheets, crumpling them into tight balls.

He was adorable.

Jared reached out to flick on the bedroom light, rubbing the
remnants of sleep from his eyes with one solid fist.

A flush of utter happiness washed over Anne. It wouldn’t be long before she’d see a little boy with those same eyes … or a little girl with that same tousled, sandy hair.

Their child.

All the years of waiting, the visits to doctors, the requests for prayer. All the hopes and dreams they’d shared, given up, then reclaimed every time Anne thought she might be pregnant. All the disappointments, the sense of failure and empty longing as other women had baby after baby, as though it were the easiest thing in the world. It was all over.

She was having a baby.

Another stab of pain gripped her, and she sucked in a breath. She was having a baby, all right. And she was having it now!

“Honey—” Anne grasped Jared’s arm—“it’s happening.”

That brought his eyes wide open, and he was up and out of the bed in a heartbeat. In Jared’s typical prepare-for-every-contingency manner, he’d slept in his trousers. His shirt, socks, and shoes lay waiting near the bed, perfectly positioned for getting dressed should the baby decide to make its appearance during the night.

Last night Anne hadn’t been able to resist teasing him. “Your child wouldn’t dream of doing anything unexpected, dear.”

“
Your
child—” came his laughing response—“wouldn’t dream of doing anything else!”

Apparently Jared had been right.

As Anne pushed herself to the edge of the bed, Jared perched on the mattress to pull on his socks and shoes. He glanced at her over his shoulder. “Are you okay? Is the baby okay?”

Anne’s laughter was only slightly strained as she patted his muscled arm. “We’re both fine. It’s—” Words lodged in her throat as a contraction cut through her. When it finally eased, she drew in a deep breath and managed a smile. “I think your son is in a hurry to meet you.”

A tender smile lifted his lips, and he held a hand out to pull her up. “More likely your daughter figures it’s time to be the center of attention.”

Anne let him enfold her, leaning against his solid frame as his arms came around her, holding her, sheltering her. She spread her palm over his heart, feeling the even beat. How could one man be so strong and yet so gentle? And how had she ever been so blessed that he should love her?

Anne didn’t know, but she’d spend her whole life being grateful.

Another contraction hit, this one more extended. She buried her face in Jared’s chest until it passed, then looked up and started at the grimace on his features. Glancing down she saw the handful of chest hair she’d been clutching.

It took all of her willpower to not laugh out loud. “Umm … sorry.”

He eased her fingers free and rubbed his chest, the lopsided grin she loved so dearly peeking out at her.

“Not near as sorry as I am.” His fingers entwined with hers as he lifted her hand to kiss her fingers. “But I forgive you. Now, what say we get you to the hospital and get this baby born?”

“I say—” this time she was the one who grimaced as her midsection convulsed—“
yes
.”

He helped her waddle toward the door. “I thought you might.”

“Aaahhhh!”

The scream escaped Anne despite her best intentions. She hadn’t thought it possible, but the contraction seemed to double, and her hands dug into the sheets. Jared’s strong arm slipped behind her. “Cleansing breath, hon. Remember?”

She nodded, teeth clenched, and sucked in a breath.

“Pant, Annie. Hee hee
hoo
…”

She tried to focus on her husband’s coaching. He fed her another ice chip, then dabbed a cool cloth to her face.

I’m so tired, Lord. Please … please … make the pain stop
.

Wetness trickled down her face, and Anne shook her head. What was she doing crying? This baby wasn’t supposed to happen, wasn’t supposed to be possible. Diagnosed
with diabetes five years ago in her late twenties, the doctor had told her over and over that her disease would make becoming pregnant difficult, even dangerous.

“Your sugars are all over the map, Anne,” he’d intoned on more occasions than she could number. “We’re doing our best to regulate them, but your body isn’t cooperating.” This was always followed by him flipping her chart shut, the click a sound as final as a door closing in her face. “Add your age to that—”

“But Jared’s doctor says he’s a
perfect
age for having children, and he’s only two years older than I am!”

The doctor shrugged. “What can I say? He’s a man. But for you, I’m afraid pregnancy just isn’t a safe option.”

Anne had shed many tears over those words. Needless tears, because though the doctor dealt in medicine, God dealt in miracles. He not only planted in her the strong desire to have children, He touched her body, bringing her rebel sugars under control. He helped her manage her eating habits and get her body in shape. She and Jared took up jogging. She wasn’t an athlete like he was, but she was determined. She
would
be healthy.

Then, when against all odds she finally became pregnant at the ripe old age of thirty-three, God helped her come through the difficult pregnancy so well that her doctor could only shake his head.

On her last visit, he set the chart down beside her on the examining table and patted her arm. “You’re doing great, Anne.
Somebody
must be watching out for you.”

Indeed, He was.

So how could she complain now about a few hours of labor? So what if she had to endure pain? God had given her a child.

“Hon?”

Anne turned to see Jared studying her. “Are you okay? You got so—quiet.”

She mustered up a smile. “I was thinking how lucky I am.”

Before he could respond, she was seized by searing pain. She squeezed her eyes closed, concentrating on what she’d
learned in their childbirth classes.
Pant, pant, blow. Pant, pant, blow
… “Hee, hee—
hooohhhh
!”

“Can’t you
do
something?”

Jared’s firm question snapped her eyes open. “I’m
trying
!”

“We’re doing everything we can, Mr. Bennett.”

At the nurse’s low words, Anne realized Jared hadn’t been talking to her but to the nurse at her side.

As the contraction finally eased, Anne licked her dry lips and laid her head back against the pillow. If only she could sleep. Over the last twenty-four hours, she’d snatched a moment here and there, but the contractions never let up long enough for her to really rest.

“Maybe you could give her something. Some medication to ease the pain—”

“
No
.” Anne wasn’t sure they’d understood the word, coming out as it did on a groan. “No … medication.”

“Annie—”

She shook her head at Jared. “No. I want to do this right, without drugs. I want …” She brushed a hand over her face. “God will bring us through this.”

Her husband allowed himself a small frown, but Anne didn’t have the energy to say any more.

Jared slanted a look at the nurse. “Is it normal for labor to go on this long? For her to be hurting so much?”

Through a growing haze, Anne pondered his questions. Odd, but suddenly the pain wasn’t so bad. In fact, she hardly felt anything.

“She’s having a baby, Mr. Bennett.” Anne felt herself smile at the nurse’s wry observation. “Pain is an unavoidable part of that process.”

Jared’s voice grew a tad testy. “I realize that, Nurse. But she’s been in labor almost twenty-four hours. I’m concerned she can’t take this much longer.
Look
at her. She’s exhausted.”

No arguments there. Good thing she was finally going to sleep. She must be. Why else would the room be growing so dark?

“I’m sorry, Mr. Bennett, but until the doctor—”

A shrill beeping sounded someplace in the distance,
piercing Anne’s ears, setting her nerves on edge. She wanted to ask the nurse to turn the thing off so she could sleep, but her tongue wouldn’t cooperate. She wanted to look for the woman, but her eyes were shut. When had she closed them?

It didn’t really matter, though, because everyone else seemed to be speaking at once. A clutter of unfamiliar voices flew all around her.

“She’s crashing!”

“The baby’s heartbeat is dropping!”

“Get the doctor in here!”

“What’s happening?”

The last voice Anne recognized. Jared. But she’d never heard him sound like that before. Alarmed.

Frightened.

“I’m sorry, Mr. Bennett. You’ll have to go to the waiting room.”

“Why?”

“We have to get your wife into surgery.”

Another voice broke in behind Anne. “Come on! Move! We’re losing them!”

Suddenly Anne was moving. She wanted to tell Jared not to worry, but it was as though everything—her arms and legs, her head, even the sheet over her—weighed a ton. They pulled her down … down…

She managed to pry her eyes open, spotting her husband just before they took her from the room. His face was so pale.

Don’t worry, Jared. I’m fine…

Had she said it out loud? She wasn’t certain. All she knew was that the darkness was growing stronger. And she was too tired to fight it.

With a sigh, she let her eyelids lower and surrendered, welcoming the inky blackness as it enfolded her, drawing her, at long last, into blessed, peaceful nothingness.

two

JARED PRESSED HIS ACHING EYES, GRATEFUL FOR THE darkness around him.

“God, please … let them be okay.”

He was glad he was alone in the hospital chapel. Leaning his forehead on the pew in front of him, he drew in a shuddering sigh.

He couldn’t get it out of his mind. His last sight of Annie. How pale she’d been. How she couldn’t keep her eyes open. How the doctors and nurses had rushed around, alarm in their every feature and movement. And then those terrible words…