A Texas Holiday Miracle (7 page)

She held out the thermos. “You might need something to wash it down.”

He took it without a sharp quip. While he ate, she nibbled on an Oreo, and then offered them to him. He took the bag without a word and they ate cookies in silence.

Pepper didn’t move. She was stretched out with her head on the corner of the bed. The poor thing had suffered enough, and Lacey’s heart broke at what would happen tomorrow. But it was time.

“I’ll be here after I drop Emma off at school in the morning.”

He didn’t respond.

Darkness now bathed the neighborhood, and the air had grown colder. The outdoor noises had gone quiet like the hush before a storm. Lacey didn’t know whether to go or stay. Gabe was clearly struggling.

He gave her the thermos. “I...I’ve made up my mind, so I’ll be fine. But thanks for being here and thanks for lunch today and supper. I forgot to thank you earlier.”

Her throat closed up. He was so sincere, and she knew the battle inside him was ongoing. The thermos wasn’t empty, so she handed it back to him. “You’ll need something to finish off the cookies.”

He looked up at her, and from the deck light she could feel the heat of his eyes. She wanted to reach out and hug him like she had at lunch, but she knew he wouldn’t welcome that intimacy.

“Thanks,” he said simply.

“You’re welcome.” Darkness fell like a wall, shutting out the outside world. It was just the two of them. And Pepper. Lacey wrapped her arms around her waist to ward off the chill of the night. “Even though it hurts, you’re doing the right thing.”

“Yeah.” He twisted the thermos in his hands.

Unable to stop herself, she touched his arm. “Try to get some rest. Good night.”

The muscles under her fingers tightened, and she felt his strength like a band of steel. And that epitomized Gabe. Strong. Hardened. But vulnerable. Tomorrow his nerves of steel would be tested. She left with an ache in her heart.

Chapter Seven

The next morning started with an argument. Lacey wanted Emma to wear her candy-cane tights with ankle boots, and Emma wanted to wear jeans and sneakers. In the end, Lacey gave up because she had other things on her mind.

After breakfast, Emma insisted on going to see Pepper. Lacey didn’t object because she wanted to check on Gabe, too. It was cold outside—not quite freezing, with the temperature in the high 30s. She bundled up Emma and they walked next door. Gabe wasn’t outside, so she knocked. He opened it almost immediately. She expected him to be unshaven and wearing the same clothes, but his long hair was slicked back and still slightly damp from a shower. And he wore clean jeans and a T-shirt. An almost forgotten longing pierced her lower abdomen.

“Uh...can Emma see Pepper one more time, please?”

He opened the door wider and Emma ran to where Pepper lay in her bed near the cabinet.

“How’s Pepper?” Lacey asked Gabe, and she noticed the bags under his incredibly sad eyes. She wondered when he’d last slept.

“The shot has worn off and she’s whimpering a lot.”

Emma sat on the floor next to Pepper. The dog didn’t even raise her head.

Emma kissed Pepper. “It’ll be okay. You’ll feel better soon.”

“We have to go, Emma, or you’ll be late for school.” Lacey hated to leave Gabe, but she would be back in just a few minutes.

Emma got up and walked to her, still huddled in her coat. Blond hair peeked out from the hood. All Lacey could see were her big green eyes.

“I don’t want to go. I want to stay with Pepper.”

Lacey hadn’t been expecting this. She had to be firm. “You have to go to school.”

“Why can’t I stay? Pepper wants me to.”

Another unsolvable problem. Lacey did not want Emma to witness Pepper’s passing. At her age, she’d dealt with enough. Lacey guided her to the one chair in the room and Emma sat.

“Sweetie, this is not something for a little girl to witness. The vet will take care of everything and Pepper will be at peace. Just know that.”

Emma frowned. “I have to be here.”

“Emma...” Lacey didn’t know what else to say. She understood Emma loved the dog, but watching the procedure was out of the question.

“Why do you have to be here?” Gabe asked Emma, startling Lacey. She had expected him to ignore them.

“Because Lacey wouldn’t let me be there when Daddy went to heaven, and I want to be here when Pepper goes to heaven.”

Lacey was stunned. She’d had no idea Emma felt this way. She knelt in front of her. “Sweetie, I was in the hall with you when Daddy passed. The doctor asked us to leave the room. If I had had any idea it was his time, we would never have left. I just...just didn’t know.” A sob clogged her throat and she had to stop. She had failed Emma. And she’d failed herself.

“We should have been there, Lacey,” Emma said.

Yes
blocked her brain with so many regrettable memories. She’d done the best she could at the time, and there was no going back to change that. When the doctor had come out of the room and told them their father had passed away, she’d felt as if someone had pulled the floor out from under her and she was tumbling, tumbling down into the deepest hole of despair. But she’d had to get up. She’d had to get up for Emma.

Lacey gathered Emma into her arms and sat with her in the chair. She had to make a decision and she had no idea if it was right or wrong. But then, every decision she’d made since their father’s death had been that way. She’d been going on faith, and she had to lean on it now.

Emma rested her head on Lacey’s shoulder. “Please let me stay. I’ll be good. I won’t cry. I promise.”

Lacey looked at Gabe. The lines around his eyes weren’t as intense because his attention was on something other than Pepper. It was on Emma. “I’ll call the vet and see what he says.”

“Thank you.” His offer was like a morsel of food to a starving person. She desperately needed someone to advise her, and the fact that it came from Gabe gave her a warm feeling.

Gabe went into the other room to make the call. Lacey untied Emma’s hood and pushed it from her head. “If the vet says no, you have to accept that. Understand?”

Emma remained silent, and Lacey knew what that meant.
Trouble.

“Emma...”

Emma sat up. “You don’t understand.”

“What don’t I understand?”

Emma studied the tips of her sneakers. “I...I have to be with Pepper when she goes to heaven because I want her to take a message to Daddy.”

Lacey swallowed hard and she couldn’t say another word. Tears stung the backs of her eyes and threatened to erupt. The only thing Lacey knew to do was to go with the moment and let Emma have this time she thought she needed. Lacey couldn’t take that away from her, even if she knew life didn’t work that way. Dogs didn’t take messages to heaven. But what did she know? Maybe they did. After all, it was the holiday season and a time for miracles.

Gabe came back into the room. “Dr. Morris said children are often present. It’s a simple procedure and as long as the child understands what’s going to happen, it usually works out well.”

“Do you mind if she stays?” Lacey had to ask because Pepper was Gabe’s dog and he might want to do this alone.

He shook his head.

She could tell by the softening of his eyes that he was okay with the situation, so that made things a lot easier.

“But we will have rules,” Lacey said.

“You always make rules,” Emma grumbled.

“Rules,” Lacey stated firmly.

“’Kay.”

“I’m going outside to get everything ready.” Gabe laid his cell phone on the table and headed for the garage. “I want it done on the deck were Pepper loves to stay.”

“I’ll help.” Emma tried to jump from Lacey’s lap, but Lacey held tight.

Gabe paused in the doorway. “You can watch Pepper while I’m busy.”

“’Kay.”

Lacey unbuttoned Emma’s coat. Emma sat on the floor, talking to Pepper. Lacey wondered what message her sister wanted Pepper to take to heaven. It was clear Emma didn’t have closure about their dad’s death. Lacey wasn’t sure she did, either. They were both going through the motions of living. Just like Gabe. Hopefully, today would be a turning point for all of them. And not a step backward.

Since Gabe’s phone was right there, she decided to use it to call the school about Emma. She didn’t think he’d mind. Gabe was so out of touch that she was surprised he had a cell. She didn’t mean to invade his privacy and it was none of her business, but when she opened the phone she noticed there were twenty-two missed calls from Kate Rebel. Lacey quickly made her call and clicked off.

Glancing out the back door, she saw him setting up a card table. The coffin was next to it on the deck. He worked thoroughly engrossed, as she’d always seen him do. Who was this woman who was desperately trying to reach him? Again, none of her business.

“Lacey, why is there only one chair?” Emma asked, getting bored as six-year-olds were known to do.

“I don’t know.”

Emma looked at the wall of photos. “Why are there so many pictures?”

“Gabe likes looking at his son” was the only answer she had.

“Oh.” Emma turned her attention back to Pepper. “She’s whimpering.”

“Just stroke her. It helps her relax.”

The doorbell rang. Lacey opened the back door and said to Gabe, “I think the vet’s here.”

Gabe came into the house. He wore just a black hoodie, but he didn’t seem to be cold. “I’ll let him in.”

A young man in his thirties with blond hair and blue eyes followed Gabe into the kitchen. “This is Dr. Morris, and Dr. Morris, this is Lacey and Emma Carroll, my neighbors.”

They shook hands and Dr. Morris looked at Emma. “So you want to be here today for Pepper?”

Emma stood up and brushed blond hair from her face. “Pepper is my friend and I want to be here when she goes to heaven.”

“That’s very brave,” the vet told her, leaning down to Emma’s level. “Do you know what an IV is?”

“Yes. My daddy had one when he was in the hospital.”

“Good. I’m going to put an IV in Pepper’s foreleg so I can give her medication that will gently put her to sleep.”

Emma rubbed her head. “Will it hurt?”

“No.”

“Then she’ll go to heaven?”

“Yes. It doesn’t take long. I’m going to go outside with Gabe and get everything ready, and when it’s time your mother can bring you out.”

“Lacey’s not my mother. She’s my sister,” Emma quickly corrected him.

“Oh, sorry.” The vet seemed confused. “You look so much alike.”

“’Cause we’re sisters,” Emma stated.

Dr. Morris nodded. “Yes. I know now.”

Without another word the two men went out onto the deck. Lacey could see them talking, and then Gabe came back into the house. He knelt down by Emma and Pepper.

“I’m going to take her outside.”

Emma kissed the dog. “Goodbye, Pepper.”

Lacey couldn’t believe Emma was taking this so well. Tears burned her eyes, and she feared this might not have the outcome Emma wanted. But she would be here to help her. And Gabe.

Gabe picked up the dog bed with Pepper in it as if it weighed no more than his phone. She held the door open, and he carried Pepper outside to the table. Their eyes met briefly. All she could see was resignation mixed with pain.

Emma ran to her and wrapped her arms around Lacey’s waist. “The doctor won’t forget, will he, Lacey?”

“No, sweetie. Put your coat back on so you’ll be ready.”

Emma did as Lacey asked, and they waited. Gabe stood by the table, his hand on Pepper while the vet worked. Tall, strong, yet vulnerable like the big oak that was not twelve feet from him. She wanted to go to him, but she had Emma to think about. She was torn about who needed her most.

It was a relief when Gabe motioned for them to come outside. Emma shot out the door and stood next to Gabe, touching Pepper gently. Lacey stood on Gabe’s other side.

The vet had his hand over the IV in Pepper’s foreleg. “Say goodbye,” he said, and then she noticed that with his other hand he injected the medication into the IV.

“Bye, Pepper. I love you,” Emma whispered. “When you see my daddy, tell him I love him.”

The words were low, but Lacey heard them. Her chest tightened in pain. Emma hadn’t had the chance to say that to their father before he’d passed, and obviously it had bothered her. Lacey didn’t have time to dwell on it, as she felt the man beside her tremble. She rubbed his back in reassurance, just as she would have done to Emma. He leaned into her hand as if he needed her support.

The vet removed the IV very quickly so Emma couldn’t see. Pepper took a short breath, and then she was still. Gabe stroked her head, “Goodbye, girl. You’re at peace now. I’m sorry it took me so long to do...this.” His voice wavered on the last word, and Lacey clutched him around the waist for reassurance.

The sun popped out like a cork from a bottle, spreading its goodness everywhere and lighting up the cold, dreary day.

“Is Pepper gone?” Emma asked.

The vet nodded. “Yes.”

Emma glanced toward the bright sunshine. “She turned on the light for us.”

It was a moment of relief for all of them. The vet put everything back into his bag and helped Gabe lift Pepper into the coffin, bed and all. Gabe covered her with a big quilt and positioned the lid on top.

“Would you like me to help?” the vet asked.

“No, thanks. I have it from here.” The two men shook hands and Dr. Morris left.

Until that moment, Lacey hadn’t noticed the big hole Gabe had dug against the wood fence. He must’ve stayed up all night digging.

Gabe picked up a nail gun from the deck and nailed the coffin shut. Emma watched all of this without saying a word. She seemed fine, but Lacey was skeptical.

When Gabe finished, Lacey stood at one end of the box. “I’ll help you carry it.”

Gabe didn’t respond. He just picked up his end and they carried it to the hole. Emma followed without saying a word. Gabe jumped into the hole, and then picked up the coffin and slid it in. He had to step on the box to get out. Then he marched toward the house.

“Where you going?” Emma called.

“To get a shovel to close the hole.”

Emma made a dash for their house. Lacey had no idea where she was going until she came back with a small shovel their dad had bought for her to help in the yard. Lacey wasn’t going to be left out, so she went to the garage and found their father’s spade.

The three of them shoveled dirt over the coffin. Lacey’s arms grew tired, but Gabe and Emma kept dirt flying. Gabe stopped long enough to remove his hoodie. She could see the muscles in his arms bulging as he worked in just a black T-shirt. Lacey stopped for a moment just to watch, and then she caught herself. This was definitely not the time.

Gabe used a rake to smooth out the dirt. Pepper had been put to rest. Emma glanced toward the bright sunshine.

“Pepper’s happy now.”

“Yes,” Lacey agreed, and thought it chased away the sadness of today. “Time to go to school.”

“’Kay.” Unexpectedly, Emma hugged Gabe around the waist and he tensed. “Bye, Mr. Gabe.” She ran for the house.

“I’ll be back as soon as I can,” Lacey said to Gabe.

“There’s no need. I’m fine.”

She eyed that strange look on his face. He was shutting her out again. Shutting out the world because he felt safer that way.

“You did the right thing. It was a big step forward. Keep taking those steps.”

“I don’t need your armchair psychology. I think it’s best if we went back to being—”

“What?” She lifted an eyebrow. “Neighbors? Enemies? Friends? Or maybe nothing at all would suit you best.” She shook her head. “But that’s not going to happen. I’ll be back whether you like it or not.”

She left him standing in the backyard with a befuddled look on his face. She’d never met anyone so conflicted. She supposed he had reason, but two years was long enough. Gabe had to start living again. Why that was so important to her, she had no idea. Maybe the pain in her reacted to the pain in him. Whatever it was, she was determined they would at least be friends.

* * *

T
HE
HOUSE
WAS
very quiet without Pepper. Even the deck was lonely, and that loneliness went all the way to Gabe’s soul. He cleaned out the garage from building the coffin and put everything away. Keeping busy kept him from thinking. After everything was back in its place, he went for a jog. He did that often to keep the memories at bay. Up and down Horseshoe streets he jogged, around the business district and to the school. He didn’t stop until he was so tired he was forced to.