Accepted Fate (43 page)

"Dad I need your help. Kinzleigh is on the way to Wesley because Natalie spiked her punch with ecstasy and she started to panic and went into a seizure. She has anxiety and panic attacks. Dad I need you to help her. Please help her. I don't know what to do. Dad, I love her. You have to help her." I'm talking so fast, I can barely get the words out at a loss of breath. I just realized I have said the L word out loud for the first time, other than to Kinzleigh. I'm scared to even look at the reaction on my brothers' faces or the girls'. I completely forgot they were in the truck.

  "Calm down son. I'll call the Neurologist on call and meet you at the hospital. We'll get her the best care possible. She'll be okay. See you in a bit." He hangs up the call and I drop the phone in my lap. I tighten my grip on the steering wheel and I press my foot firmly on the gas pedal to increase my speed trying to get to her faster.

I look over at Adalynn and she is still crying. "I need you to call Kinzleigh's parents. I'm not sure I can right now, but they need to know. Will you do that?"

She looks at me with a hint of admiration and her face falls slightly. "Sure Breyson, I can do that." I turn back to look at the road when she pulls out her cell phone to call.

We pull into the emergency entrance of the hospital and find a parking spot. As soon as I get the truck parked and shut off, I bail from the truck and take off running toward the entrance, leaving everyone else behind along with my keys. My brothers can get them or leave them. Someone can steal the damn thing for all I care as long as I get to her.

When I get to the desk, the lady is talking on the phone. I begin tapping my fingers on the desk impatiently, waiting for her to be free. After what seems like an eternity, she hangs up the phone and looks at me. "Can I help you son?"

"I need to know where they took Kinzleigh Baker. She arrived by ambulance a few minutes ago." She begins typing on the computer and looks up at me.

"Do you know her date of birth?"

"October 5, 1995" She looks back at the screen and explains what floor Neurology is on. I turn and take off towards the elevator.

Once I get off on the floor I was instructed, I see the nurse's station ahead. I'm panicking at not knowing how she is. The nurse tells me that she is going through some testing right now and that the doctor will come give me an update soon. Is she freaking serious? How am I supposed to sit here not knowing how she's doing? My frustration is building up inside and I want to hit something to release some of it.

I try to persuade her to give me something I can use but it's pointless. She refuses to tell me anything without a doctor present. Obviously, I'm not going to get anywhere and walk to the waiting area that I'm instructed to just sit in as if the love of my life isn't somewhere in the vicinity hurt. 

I sit down in the leather chair and bend forward, placing my bent elbows on my legs just above my knees. Placing my forehead in the palm of my hand, I grip my hair. I pull hard, trying to draw the pain away from my chest. I close my eyes, trying to drown out the bad thoughts running through my mind. I can hear the leather of the chairs beside me, telling me someone just sat down. "So you love her?" I look beside me and see Briar sitting down, leaning back in the chair, along with Braxton on the other side.

Somehow it seems more intimate admitting it to someone else. Me and Briar have always been close because the three of us are triplets, but we don't have as many
heart to hearts
as you call it, as Braxton and I do. I look over to him and see the worried expression on his face. "Like crazy; so much that if anything happens to her, I may very well die from heartbreak because if her heart goes, so does mine. I've never felt more whole hearted than when she's around. I can't lose her Briar. I'm in too deep."

My vision clouds and I rub my hands over my face. I will not let my brothers see me cry again. A man is only allowed a cry ever so often without being considered a wuss. The girls are across the waiting area consoling each other and Braxton is staring off into space. I don't know what's going on with him lately. I think he went into Adalynn as a hookup and is beginning to have feelings for her. He doesn't even talk about other girls anymore, but I get the impression he feels guilty having feelings for someone other than Madileigh.

Briar leans forward, mirroring my position. "I can tell. I've never seen you like this over a girl before. It's kind of nice to see you care about someone. She's a good girl Breyson. Take care of her. There aren't many girls like her out there. She's the kind of girl parents brag about and want as daughter in laws. Make sure you treat her as the precious jewel she is because if you screw up, there are a line of guys waiting to scoop her up. I know you don't want to hear it, but you need to be aware of it. Protect her at all costs. You have a lot of girls after you and now you see what kind of psychotic jealous bullshit they will do to get to you. Just because Natalie is the first, don't think she'll be the last. If you get a shot at the NFL, it's bound to get worse."

Sitting here listening to this feels like Déjà vu. It's so similar to that day on the boat, deep sea fishing with Ryland. Do people really think I don't know what I have? Do I come off as that big of a prick? I stopped thinking with my dick the day I met her on the beach. I know she's special. I know she's wanted by other men. Over my dead body will they get her, but I'm not stupid enough to think there aren't people that would kill to replace me. I feel like I could throw up at the thought of some sleazy girl trying to harm her. I'll just have to pay closer attention when she's around. I feel so stupid for trusting Natalie. I thought she was better than that but I was way off kilter with her. 

"I know all that." I growl. "I'm so stupid. Dammit, why did I trust her?" I smash the heel of my hand into my forehead. "I hate Natalie for doing this to her; to me. She better hope Kinzleigh isn't damaged because I won't be responsible for the aftermath if she is."

"Don't do something stupid Breyson. Jealousy blinds people. I'm not, in any form, defending Natalie, but remember she's someone's daughter just like Kinzleigh. You're not thinking straight right now because you're hurt and I get that. All I'm saying is to use your head." Maybe he doesn't get it because it's not Londyn laying helpless on that bed.

"It's easy for you to say, because it isn't Londyn lying in there helpless and defenseless and scared. Put yourself in my shoes. If it was her, are you saying you wouldn't avenge an act of wrong done to her when she didn't deserve it? Come on, you're the starting pitcher. You have just as many girls after you as I do. An eye for an eye right? If something happens to her I will not move on like nothing happened. No one made Natalie do what she did." As he considers what I've just said he remains quiet. He acts like he's about to say something but then shuts his mouth. It seems a little different when you imagine it being your loved one laying there for no good reason. Everyone has a piece of advice to give, until they actually put themselves in that place. Then it changes your perspective.

Kinzleigh's parents come in the waiting room in a rush. They look extremely worried and I don't blame them. As they get closer to me, I stand and rush over to them, placing my hands in my pockets and lowering my head to the floor. I feel like a puppy that was just scolded. "Mr. and Mrs. Baker I'm so sorry." My voice cracks. "I didn't know the drink was spiked but it's all my fault. I take full responsibility for what happened. I should have never accepted a drink from someone that I knew has been acting abnormal." I press my fingers into my eyelids, trying to stop the tears that want to emerge out of rage for this whole situation.

When we started dating, all her dad asked me to do was to respect her, protect her, and love her the way she deserves to be loved or set her free. I made a promise I would do all of those things and I failed miserably. Her mother is crying. Mr. Baker looks at her. "Leigh, why don't you go get us some coffee until we hear from the doctor. I need to talk to Breyson."

He probably wants to kill me. I can't say that I blame him. If I were him, I would want to kill me too. What he asked of me was simple enough. If I can't handle those three small tasks, maybe I don't deserve her. She nods and walks off in search of the cafeteria. When he looks back at me, I'm actually surprised. He doesn't look mad at all like I imagined he would be. He looks at his watch and then up at me. "Come on son, let's go some place quiet. I imagine it'll be a while before we can see her. They are still running tests." He wraps his arm around me and squeezes my shoulder in his hand, leading me toward the hallway.

We come into a vacant hallway and stop against the wall. I'm really nervous and I'm never nervous. My palms are sweaty and I wipe them on my jeans, trying to dry them off. He stands there zoned out for a few minutes, calculating what he is going to say. "It's not your fault. I don't want you to beat yourself up about this." I start to open my mouth to say something and he holds up his hand stopping me. "Let me finish. I can see the guilt written all over your face. I admire the fact that you're willing to take the fall for someone else's shortcomings but it's really not necessary. You have done more than what I expected from you in regards to my daughter. Every man is terrified of having to trust his little girl to another man and you have well earned my trust with her."

I'm a little shocked to be honest. Usually you hear about men waiting around with their shotguns, looking for a good reason to pick a guy off around their daughters. He doesn't look like he's finished saying what he needs to say so I remain quiet. "The world is an ugly place. We all learn that when we brings kids into this world. You raise them to the best of your abilities and hope everything turns out well, but it wouldn't be realistic of me to think nothing bad is ever going to happen. Kinzleigh has always been an exceptional child. She never parties, never drinks, and I'm going to hope that she doesn't have sex, but I'm not even going there because I don't want to know. She's eighteen and there isn't much I can do about it now, but there are some things a father just can't deal with knowing. I'm proud that she has chosen someone like you. I think you're a good kid Breyson and you follow the rules her mother and I have set, no questions asked. We never worry when she's with you. I need you to be strong for her. When she wakes up, she is going to want you there and I don't want you causing her more panic by blaming yourself. She has had anxiety issues for a while now and I don't want to add any more stress. I can tell that you love her. Most people think that young love is just a teenager blinded by lust and expectations from watching too many movies, but I disagree. Sometimes love that starts out in the early years is the strongest kind, because you experience more highs and lows together. If you don't do anything else I ask you of you, I need you to do this. If you love her, stop blaming yourself and be the strength she needs when she can't find her own. Are you picking up what I'm putting down son?"

I let out a sigh of relief. He's right, I just never thought of it like that. "Yes sir. I can do that. I just hate seeing her hurt. I do love her sir and I can honestly say I've never loved a girl before. She's special to me and I'm almost positive I'd be in a bad place if something happened to her."

He pushes off the wall he was leaning against. "I appreciate your honesty son. Honesty and love will get you far in life. Always remember that. Let's go. We have a sick girl to take care of."

Shortly after we got back to the lobby, the doctor walks out and gives us an update on her condition. He said he thinks the anxiety attack started from her panicking over the drug effects and in turn caused an overload on her brain. Since she already has issues with anxiety, the mixture of that and the drug’s effects on her brain caused an overload and the way it reacted was through the seizure, trying to protect itself. He ran extensive tests on her brain and didn't see any permanent damage.
Thank you God. I owe you everything.
He did say because her body has had one seizure, he has to put her on anti seizure medication to prevent any further.

The doctor gave us permission to go into her room, but gave us orders; only two at a time and to let her rest because she would most likely be out for a while from the wear down of the seizure on her brain and body. He is keeping her until she awakens and then will do another test before he releases her. I'm only thankful that it isn't worse than it is.

I am standing here staring at the door to her room, waiting to enter. Her parents were getting tired since it's past midnight and went in to see her first. Dad came by to check on Kinzleigh and took rounds for another physician since he was here for me. He said he would stay in touch with the Neurologist on her condition and check back in a little later.

I refuse to leave her alone here. After meeting my dad, her dad agreed to let me stay since nurses will be in and out all night and said they would be back first thing in the morning, once they've had some sleep. My dad had a cot sent up when he finally got the point that I wasn't leaving until she did. Briar, Londyn, Braxton and Adalynn all made their rounds and left to get some sleep as well. Mom came in to make her rounds with patients but is on the Obstetrics floor and said she would come back down when Kinzleigh was awake to formally meet her.

I push the door open and see her laying perfectly still on the hospital bed. She is hooked to all kinds of machines, keeping track of brain activity and heart rate as well as major vitals. Her hair is fanned out across the pillow and she is wearing a white hospital gown and covered with a blanket. She looks like an angel. I place my palm over my heart and rub at the pain in my chest. It's dulled a little since I received the knowledge that she'll be okay, but still present. Even in the hospital she's absolutely beautiful. Damn, I love her.

Walking over to the side of the bed farthest from the door, I move the chair from the window to the side of her bed and sit. Interlocking her fingers in mine, I just stare at her while she sleeps. She looks so peaceful; you would never think just a few hours ago this happened. I will never be able to remove seeing her like that from my mind. I never again want to feel that helpless for her.