Accounting for Lust (23 page)

“Poor Marvin.”

Jake stared intently at Cassie. “You can’t feel sorry for him. He almost killed you.”

“I know, but he built his entire
world
on the lies his mother told him. You have to agree, it’s sad.”

He shook his head in disbelief
, but didn’t offer any further comment
.
“He cloned your laptop using the same IP address to log on to the network. With the camera installed in your office, it was easy to transfer the funds. He did the same to your father. Matt found most of the funds in
the trust’s
bank account. Except for about five million
Rand
, you should be able to retrieve all the losses.”

“That’s wonderful.” The opening of the elevator doors saved her from further comment. She should be elated that the nightmare ended, but instead, a sense of loss threatened to close her throat with unshed tears.

For the first couple of floors neither of them spoke. Jake seemed to come to a decision and with a muffled curse, he pressed the stop button and shut off the alarm.

“I can’t do this. I can’t let you go like this.”

Cassie shook her head. “We both knew this was temporary. There’s no future for us in a relationship. You have your world and I have mine. In normal circumstances we never would’ve met. Let it go.”

“No.”

Jake
trapped
her against the wall. Need flooded Cassie’s bloodstream and she despised herself for wanting him even after the horrible events of the day. When his lips descended on hers, she met him halfway, opening her mouth to allow his tongue inside. Lust and need collided and her arms drew him closer
.
Just one more time. To remember.

No.

Time to
say goodbye
.

Her arms cramped around him before she
released
him and cowered in the corner of the elevator. Willing her breathing to slow, she inhaled deeply. Staring at a spot above him, she resisted the urge to hug her breaking heart.

“We had a wonderful time. Now we have to move on.”

Jake shook his head and stepped towards her. She stopped him with the lift of her hand.

“No, Jake. I will never fit into your world and you won’t fit into mine. I don’t do relationships and neither do you.
A relationship implies love.
What we had was chemistry. Explosive and mind-blowing, but still only
lust
. Let’s leave it that while the memories are still good.”

He remained silent for so long Cassie thought he wouldn’t answer.

“If that’s what you really want.”

“It is.”

They waited in silence for the elevator the reach the underground parking. At the ping, Jake mumbled a greeting and hurried through the doors.

A lone tear escap
ed
as she
whispered
goodbye to her dream lover
and watched the Discovery exit through the gate
.

“The new CEO seems to cope very well.” Joshua cocked his head in the direction of the man who took over from Cassie almost two months ago. The only indication the man gave
that he heard the comment
, was a slight inclination of his head.
Only one of the board members objected to Cassie appointing the new man and
relinquishing control
. Today, they all hung onto his lips as he lead the first meeting with him as permanent chairman
of Adams Armoury Incorporated
.

“Yes and he’s doing a better job than I could ever hope to do. I’m sick and tired of corporate games and our practice needs our attention right now.
” Even to her own ears
,
the statement rang false, but she persisted. If you told yourself something over and over, you come to believe in the truth of the statement . . . or so they said.

Joshua shook his head. “No Cassie. You need a holiday. You’ve lost weight and look tired. After the near fiasco with the contracts last week
at our practice
, I don’t want you near the
office
for at least a couple of weeks. Take time off. Go on vacation. I don’t care what you do, as long as you get some colour in those cheeks of yours.”

“But . . . “

“No buts. Your father’s company is safe and well on its way to being the prosperous business it was before Marvin came on the scene.
There’s nothing pressing at the accounting practice that I can’t handle.
Now, you
have to
concentrate on
figuring out what
you want.”

Cassie sighed.
The last thing she wanted was time to think. She knew what she wanted and she also knew she would never have it. What was the point in rehashing the scenarios if she always arrived at the same conclusion? Alone. And frustrated. Maybe Joshua was right. Maybe she did need some time to
decide
where she had to go from here and what to do to pick up the pieces.

“All right. I’ll take time off. Only two weeks though. I don’t think I’ll be able to sit still for any longer than that.”

Two days later, Cassie stared out over the Indian ocean, letting the rhythmic sloshing of the water soothe her senses. It somehow made sense to return to the place where her happiest and saddest moments started. She’d come a full circle. Having met Jake in Mauritius it was only fitting to bade his memories a final farewell in the same place.

She stifled a yawn and
rose from the chair on the veranda of the cabana. A walk along the beach sounded good to clear the cobwebs from her mind. She pulled the clip from her hair, kicked off her shoes and closed the door of the cabana behind her. Jet lag dragged at her legs, but with nowhere
else
to be she slowly made her way to the beach.

Soothed by the waves lapping at her feet, she strolled towards
the
deserted palm-lined beach in the distance.
A soft breeze plucked at her hair and she wiped the loose strands from her face. The other holidaymakers disappeared from view
, but she kept going.

On the slight rise of a dune
,
she sat
o
n the sand and hugged her arms to her. For the first time since Jake left, she allowed the tears of longing and loss to flow freely over her cheeks. The emptiness left by his departure, sliced through her like a physical pain.
In the week they had together, she’d manage to fall irrevocably in love with this gentle and strong man.
And she didn’t know if she would be strong enough to live without him.

During the past two months, she’d picked up the telephone a hundred times to phone him,
but couldn’t
. What would she say?
That
they had a future together
?
N
othing
had
changed. She pulled her thoughts up short. Maybe she
had
changed.
Lately, h
er work
failed to fulfil her.
B
eing independent had lost its appeal. Maybe she
could
fit into his
world
.

With a start, she realised she knew nothing about where he lived, what he did when he wasn’t working, what food he liked and disliked. How could she love a man she knew so little about? Easy, her mind answered. He was kind, gentle and loving. And she missed him. Hugging her legs to her chest, Cassie lowered her head to her knees. She had two weeks to work out how to convince Jake that they would be good together and even if he didn’t love her, she had enough love for both of them.

Jake watched from a distance as Cassie
sank to
the sand. The last couple of months were sheer torture. He kept
tabs
on her from the day he walked
ou
t
, telling himself he was only doing his job. Making sure there were no other surprises they missed during the investigation.

After a while, he stopped deluding himself. He needed to see her, even if she didn’t want to see him. She was like a thorn in his side he couldn’t get rid of. When he didn’t watch her from a distance, he dreamed of her in his arms, in his house, carrying his child. He couldn’t get her out of his mind.

Only when Matt insisted he take time off to sort his personal
stuff
out, did Jake realize what a mess he had made of his work. He couldn’t concentrate on anything else but seeing Cassie. He needed her. If that meant he had to change to fit into her
world
, he was willing to do so. He loved her. He loved the way she managed to turn a cup of coffee into a gourmet meal just because she enjoyed it with him. He loved the way her hips swayed when she became agitated. He loved the way she tried to hide her beauty by pulling her hair into a tight bun, trying and failing to add years to her appearance. He loved the way she fit right under his arm. He loved her. Just as she was.

Learning she had booked a flight to Mauritius gave him hope she might feel something for him as well. She’d lost weight and the dark circles under her eyes made no sense. His Cassie was not happy. And he hoped like hell it had something to do with him. Afraid of being hurt and
making a fool of himself, he procrastinated in approaching her. He couldn’t wait any longer. He had to know that she would be part of his life.
He couldn’t let her go.

Jake stepped onto the beach and started towards the lone figure on the dune while the sun touched the ocean, colouring the sky in a myriad of pinks. His heart beat frantically in his chest as
he walked closer to
the small figure
with her chin resting on her knees
.

Someone else was on the beach. Cassie lifted her head and stared in the direction of the man walking towards her. From this distance, the fading light made identification impossible. Her body reacted as though it recognised the man. Jake.
She giggled softly. Her imagination wanted him here with her so badly, it was conjuring up visions of him everywhere. Turning her attention to the ocean, she watched as the sun
drowned
half its size in the ocean. Twilight surrounded her and although the island was safe, she cast a quick glance in the direction of the approaching figure again.

He was much closer now and heading straight towards her. Still her mind played tricks on her and the familiar gait of the large man had a lump forming in her throat all over again. She must be losing her mind. Just now, her body would insist she jump into the stranger’s arms and kiss him senseless.

“Cassie?”

Great. Now she was hearing things as well. Joshua would have a field day if he knew how accurate his assessment of her state of mind was.

“Cassie?”

Her head snapped up. “You’re real?”

Jake chuckled and the
r
umbles resonated
deep
within Cassie. He was real. She wasn
’
t losing her mind. Cassie bolted from the sand and
stumbled
.

“Jake. What are you doing here?”

“Looking for you.”

“Why?”

He stepped closer and held out his hand to her. Her memory didn’t do him justice and her eyes devoured the contours of his face.
She ached to fling herself into his arms and hug him close, feeling every inch of his hard body against hers. His eyes questioned hers and she looked at his outstretched hand. If she took his hand, there would be
no
back
tracking
. She wouldn’t be able to even if she wanted to. That was fine with her.

Jake
’s fingers closed over hers
and
he
pulled her closer to him. “I missed you.” The huskiness in his voice opened a flower inside Cassie and emotions overflowed through her eyes.

Not trusting her voice, she nodded and kept her eyes rooted to his lips. They were moving, but Cassie couldn’t hear the words for the want of him kissing her. She
needed
his lips on hers, on her mouth. On her breasts. On her body.

“You’re not listening.”

She shook her head and reached up to pull his head
to her
. He obliged, but
kept the kiss light, only exploring the outside of her mouth. She wanted more. Much more.

“Not yet. We first have to talk.”

“Talk is overrated.”

He chuckled. “Might be so, but we have to talk first. If I keep touching you, I’ll never get to say what I came here for.” He gently put
her
from him. “You screw with my head and body in ways no other woman, no other human being, ever achieved.”