“Nope. Here in Texas. Right now my sister, Autumn, and her young daughter, Sophie, are living there. Her rotten, asshole fucker husband told her he didn’t want a family anymore and asked her leave.”
My stomach felt sick as I thought about Autumn and Sophie and how I knew what they were feeling. “He doesn’t want his daughter?”
“I said the same thing. What kind of fucker does that?”
I closed my eyes and barely said, “A monster.”
Malcolm sighed but kept looking up. “Tell me about you, Paislie. I don’t have the unfair advantage of Googling you and finding all the fun stuff out like you did.”
I bit down on my lip and smiled. “I’m pretty boring. Nothing really to tell.”
“Oh, no way. Spill it.”
I slowly took in a deep breath. I’d never told anyone about my childhood or the fact that I was raised in an orphanage.
No. One.
But with Malcolm, I felt the need to share everything with him and I couldn’t stop myself if I wanted to. “It’s really kind of a depressing story. One I’m sure you could totally do without hearing.”
He rolled over on his side and rested his head on his hand. When I glanced his way, I couldn’t help but notice how built he was. Damn. I bet he had rock-solid abs and a chest that would make me—
“I don’t think so. I want to hear it. Please.”
Dear God. Please give me the ability to not give in to my desires.
I looked back up at the sky and fixed my eyes on one single star and started talking before my brain could catch up with my silly heart.
“I was eight years old when my father left me at St. Patrick’s Orphanage. I wanted so badly for him to want me, but he never did.”
Malcolm’s hand took mine as I kept my eyes focused on the stars. “Your mom?”
Tears pooled in my eyes as I bit down hard on my inside cheek before speaking again. “She died when I was five.”
His hand squeezed mine. “I’m so sorry. Do you remember her?” A slow smile spread across my face as I thought of my only memory of her.
“I remember standing on a chair at the counter. It must have been Christmas because we were making cookies, and I remember pressing the cookie cutters into the dough. I can’t for the life of me remember what shape they were though.”
Malcolm ran his thumb over my hand and I couldn’t ignore the way it caused my skin to tingle. “Tell me what she looked like.”
I took in a shaky breath and I blew it out slowly as I grinned. “She was beautiful. I remember her smile the most. It was a happy smile. That’s the only way I know how to describe it. Her dark hair was pulled back into a low ponytail and I remember how it swung over her shoulders as she turned her head. That’s the only memory of I have of her. No pictures. Nothing. I hold that memory close to my heart.”
Malcolm didn’t say a word as he patiently waited for me to continue. “Anyway, the day my father dropped me off I met Sister Elizabeth. She was twelve years older than me and had always been more like an older sister. She still is,” I said with a chuckle as I continued to stare up.
“At one point in my life I thought I wanted to give my life over to God and join the sisterhood, but Elizabeth talked me out of it. She knew I was using it as an escape from reality. I of course turned to guys as my escape, went to college, and decided physical therapy was for me.”
“What made you pick that career?”
Moving my head to look directly at him, I laughed. “Football players.”
He lifted his eyes and chuckled. “Do tell.”
“St. Pat’s had a football team I used to help out with. Kind of like the manager I guess. Anytime the guys would get hurt, I’d watch Sister Mary tend to them. She had started nursing school before becoming a nun. The older I got, the more I did.” I wiggled my eyebrows and said, “Of course it didn’t hurt that I got to touch all the boys when that was very frowned upon. I lost my virginity to one of them after a game in the girl’s locker room. That is not a pleasant memory.”
Malcolm laughed and I loved how it vibrated through my body and settled deep into my lower stomach, pulling out the desire I had to touch him even more.
“Once I got to college I knew why Sister Elizabeth steered me away from becoming a nun. I wouldn’t have lasted a year.”
His hand squeezed mine as I shook my head and looked back up. “I worked my ass off in college, made good grades, did God’s work whenever I could and never forgot my roots at St. Patrick’s. I got hired on with one of the best physical therapy practices in the Dallas area. And guess what?” I asked as I dropped my head back to the side.
“What?”
I bit down on my lip as I stared at him before speaking again. “I still get to touch football players.”
Malcolm closed his eyes and said, “Tell me they’re pro players and not high school.”
I rolled over and slapped his chest as I laughed. “Mostly college. Some pro.”
I couldn’t help but notice he still had a hold of my hand. “Is that how you met asshole Trey?”
I jerked my head back. “You didn’t like Trey?”
“No. Mostly because he had his hands on you.”
My stomach fluttered. “Oh.” Rolling back over, I sighed. “We met at a bar. He was the first guy I’d dated in a long time. That day in Vegas, the same day we met, it hit me. He was cheating on me. I went to the airport and flew home after we left the race.”
“Really? How did you know he was cheating?”
I sat up and quickly wiped the tear away before Malcolm could see it. He followed my lead and sat up. Trying to keep my breathing steady, I turned to Malcolm. “When you’ve been lied to your whole life by people, especially men, you learn how to read when people are telling the truth and when they’re not. Like when you go to a foster home and after a few weeks they tell you things aren’t working out and you have to go back to the orphanage, but not because they don’t love you . . . but because the sisters are so lonely without you.”
I could see the look of pity in Malcolm’s eyes and I hated it. I quickly turned away and stood up. “Anyway, like I said, it’s all very depressing, but I am who I am because of it.”
“You never got adopted?” Malcolm asked as he stood.
Shaking my head, I said, “Nope,” as I popped the p loudly. “After I turned fourteen, I started working around the orphanage. It worked out perfectly. I got to stay in the wing where the sisters all slept and I earned money for college.”
“So, the reason you didn’t become a nun is because you were too horny? You slut.”
My mouth dropped open as my eyes about popped out of my head. I knew what he was doing and I appreciated it more than he knew.
“What?” I gasped. His face was deadpan as he stared at me. “I wasn’t . . . I’m not a slut!”
His arms wrapped around my waist as he pulled me to him. “Thank the fuck you’re not a nun, ‘cause if you were I would surely be going to Hell with all the things I’ve thought about doing to you in the last hour.”
“Oh,” was all I could manage to say as I felt Malcolm’s dick pressed against my stomach. My body trembled slightly and I was positive he noticed.
“We better get going. You have to work tomorrow and I have qualifying.”
He leaned over and folded up a quilt as I did the same. My mind was spinning around in my head as I tried to figure out why in the hell I just told my life story to him.
Needing to forget the last few minutes, I asked, “What’s qualifying?”
“We get time to race around the track some, and whoever has the best time gets the pole position.”
I pinched my eyebrows together. I knew nothing about racecar driving. “Pole position?”
“Basically you start up front.”
I nodded my head. “Oh, I see. So um, does this little nifty pass I have get me into the race Sunday?” I asked as I tucked a quilt under my arm and picked up a basket.
We made our way toward the elevator as Malcolm said with a hint of naughty in his voice, “That pass gets you everywhere, including on my bus.”
I wiggled my eyebrows and stepped into the elevator. “Yes!” I said with as much enthusiasm as I could. “I’ll finally get my date with Deuce. I think we’ll make popcorn and watch HGTV while you drive around the track.”
For as long as I live, I will never forget the look on Malcolm Wallace’s face as I declared I would watch HGTV on his bus . . . with his dog.
“It’s called racing, Paislie. It’s full of strategy and talent.”
I nodded as I said, “Uh-huh. Oh, I’m sure it is.” I shrugged and said, “I think Deuce and I would prefer something more entertaining and exciting like
Flip or Flop
.”
As I headed down the bleachers with a huge grin on my face, little did I know Malcolm Wallace and this track would change my life forever.
OPENING THE DOOR TO THE
bus, I couldn’t help but feel my heart do another fucking skip. The last few days I’d called myself pansy-ass I don’t know how many times and it was because of the girl standing in front of me. The sound of her voice, her name across my phone; each and every time my heart jumped or my stomach dropped.
What in the fuck was happening to me?
And I didn’t have the urge to fuck her. Well, that’s not true . . . I did want to fuck her, but I wanted to get to know her first. Kiss her while I held her firmly in my arms. Slowly make love to her while I whispered her name against her soft skin.
I closed my eyes and pushed my wayward thoughts away.
“I believe Deuce and I have a date with
Fixer Upper.
”
With a dry laugh, I motioned for her to come in. “You found the bus okay I see.”
Paislie rolled her eyes. “After I got hit on by at least ten guys all promising to rock my world in some way or another. A couple of them were kind of tempting.”
Pulling her to me, I quickly kissed her lips. I wanted to move slow with Paislie. It meant a lot to me that she knew I wanted to get to know her before we jumped into bed. Although seeing her again had me fighting the urge.
“I’m glad you weren’t too tempted.”
She grinned and replied, “Me too.”
“I missed your smile,” I whispered.
She took in a breath as her eyes lit up. “This from the man who claims he doesn’t do romance.”
“I don’t.”
Her arms wrapped around my neck while her eyes landed on my lips. “What a shame. I’d be tempted by a romantic, handsome guy who doesn’t get his kicks from driving around a track at a gazillion miles an hour.”
“Shit! I forgot I need to make the reservations for the jump.”
Paislie dropped her hands and tilted her head. “The jump?”
“Yeah, I won Daytona so Dalton has to jump with me.”
“Jump what?”
Damn, I love how clueless she is
. “Dalton, my crew chief, said he would jump out of a plane with me if I won. I won. So we’re going sky diving.”
Jerking her head back, she gave me a dazed look. Stammering over her words, she asked, “Wait . . . what? You’re jumping . . . out of . . . a plane? W-why?”
I quickly kissed her lips as I hit Tom’s number. He owned a sky diving operation back in Charlotte.
“It’s amazing. Bigger adrenaline rush than driving a gazillion miles an hour around a track.”
Something passed over Paislie’s face quickly before I could fully read it. Turning, she dropped to the floor and Deuce was all over her. “You’re the only sane one of the bunch, buddy.”
Deuce barked and licked Paislie across the face as she let out the cutest giggle I’d ever heard.
I shook my head and turned away from her. I needed to keep my head in the game, and being around Paislie only made me want to devote all my attention to her.
The knock on the bus door had me walking over and pushing it open. Tom wasn’t answering, so I sent him a quick text asking to call me back.
Dalton walked in and came to an abrupt stop when he saw Paislie. He looked between us and narrowed his eyes at me.
Paislie stood up and flashed that beautiful smile. “Hey, I’m Paislie.”
Dalton eyed her up and down like she was a bug that needed to be stomped on. “What are you doing here?” he asked as I punched him on the arm.
“What the fuck, Dalton.”
He turned and looked at me. “I need to talk to you now. Outside.”
Paislie made a face like I was in deep trouble as she took a few steps away and sat on the sofa. Deuce jumped up and sat next to her as she reached for the remote.
“Let’s find HGTV, shall we, buddy?”
I rolled my eyes as I followed Dalton out of the bus. He spun around and held up his index finger. “One rule. We had one fucking rule about the women. No fucking them on race day
before
a race. I walk in and see some knock out sitting on your damn floor. Are you kidding me?”
Right on cue, Autumn and Ashley walked up. Both of them looked between us as I pushed my hand through my hair.
“She’s not some girl I’m fucking. She’s a . . . a um . . . well she’s . . . ah.”
All three of them leaned in closer to me. “She’s what?” Dalton asked.
“More than that.”
Autumn and Ashley screamed as they raced past me and onto the bus.
“Great,” I whispered as I turned back to Dalton. “At least she was before those two showed up. Now she’ll be running away from them for her dear life.”
Dalton held up his hands and motioned for me to stop talking. “Wait. She’s more than that? Are you dating this girl?”