After The Snap (20 page)

Seth sat back and placed his fork on the table alongside his knife. He wiped his mouth on his napkin and placed it back in his lap. “Before I sign with you, I need to tell you something.”

“Is this the reason you called?”

Seth met Justin’s gaze and fear filled him. Justin was in his house and though he doubted the man would get physical if he became angry, he wondered if Justin would spill his secret.

“Whatever you have to say, even if you decide not to go with me, it will never leave this room. Trust me. I’ve kept some big secrets and I won’t spill yours.”

“Okay, I just…it’s difficult talking about it. I don’t know how you’re going to take it.”

Justin sat up straight and pushed his plate to the side. His hands were folded on the table in front of him and he leaned forward just a bit. “Trust me, Seth. I became an agent to help athletes, no other reason. I’m sure whatever it is, we can manage the situation together.”

“Alright, um, whoo. This is hard.” Seth drew in a deep breath and stared directly into Justin’s eyes, praying he was making the right decision. “I’m gay.”

Justin opened his eyes a little wider and rocked forward. He lifted his brows and then narrowed his eyes. “That’s it?”

“Yeah.” Seth stilled, worried that maybe Justin didn’t understand what he was saying. Then Justin threw his head back and let out a series of laughs that Seth didn’t expect at all. “Why are you laughing?”

“Oh God, Seth, sorry, I just thought you were going to tell me something awful, like you’d done something illegal.”

“So you’re okay representing me? I’m really gay.”

“Yeah, no problem. Trust me, you aren’t the first gay player I’ve represented. So, do you have a boyfriend?”

“I do.”

“Does he go to practices?” Justin grabbed his plate and speared a piece of broccoli.

“No, he doesn’t even know I play ball.”

Justin’s eyes went wide again and his head tilted just a little before he started shaking his head. “Come again.”

“He doesn’t know.”

“Seriously? I know a few players who would like to know your secret.”

“He doesn’t watch football.”

“What happens when he Googles your name?”

“Um, well, we haven’t gotten to the last name stage. We’re both taking it slow.”

“Sounds good. So tell me, what happened this morning that made you call me?”

Seth grabbed the back of his neck, wondering what Justin would say to him meeting Colby for sex. “Okay, well I spent the last two nights with Colby, my boyfriend, at his hotel. He doesn’t live in San Diego and was here on business. Anyway, I was walking out this morning and ran into two guys who wanted my autograph.”

“Did they say anything about you being there with your boyfriend?” Justin continued eating and Seth had started playing with his fork again.

“No, they didn’t see Colby.”

“This is easy. If anyone asks, we tell them your house was getting deep cleaned and you opted to stay at a hotel so you didn’t have to breathe the cleaning fumes. No one will question the story. Problem solved.”

“Wow, I didn’t even think of something like that. So that deal with the clothing company, how much will you make?”

“For endorsements, I take ten percent. For contract renegotiations, I get two.”

“So this deal, you’ll get five hundred thousand?”

“You okay with that?”

“Very. I just want to make sure you’re making decent money.”

Justin smiled and took another bite of his food. “I like making my clients happy.”

Seth liked that Justin didn’t see any issues with him being gay. Maybe he should have signed with an agent earlier in this process.

“You being gay isn’t an issue. We just have to figure out how you want to play it.”

“Play it?” Seth asked.

“Are you going to date women to conceal your desires?”

Seth shook his head. “No, I don’t think that would be good.”

“Okay, so when are you going to tell your boyfriend?”

“If we stay together, I’ll tell him around Thanksgiving, maybe Christmas.”

Justin placed his fork and knife on his empty plate and sat back. “You do need to tell him soon.”

“He’s not from here, but he’s moving to San Diego.”

“Moving? Is he stalking you?” Justin asked.

“No, it’s his work.” Seth stood and picked up both of their plates. “How about we move into the den and we can finish our conversation there.”

“Sure.”

Seth sunk into his favorite chair and Justin sat on the couch. The evening was turning out better than he’d expected. Justin was really a nice guy and he could see them working together for years.

“Okay, Seth, I know a little bit about your current situation and it doesn’t sound difficult. Are there any skeletons hiding in your closet?”

When he’d first started seeing Channing, he’d not thought about having to tell anyone. Now it seemed like forever ago since they’d hooked up and he was embarrassed by how it had played out.

Justin lifted a brow and tilted his head. “Just tell me. It will be easier if I know everything.”

“So when I was in college I—” Seth blew out a breath and fixed his eyes on a spot over Justin’s head. Looking back he couldn’t believe that he’d been fucking his coach.

“It can’t be that bad,” Justin said.

“I was with my coach.” His gaze met Justin’s and he shivered.

“With?” Justin asked.

“We…” Seth blew out a breath. “We had sex.”

“Oh.”

“It was…I don’t know.”

“Did he force you to do something you didn’t want to?”

“No, not really. It’s just…I did something wrong.” Seth met Justin’s eyes, wondering if he really could tell this man what had happened.

“Start at the beginning and tell me everything,” Justin said.

Seth nodded, wishing he didn’t have to replay any of this. “I played in Florida all four years. I didn’t date anyone once I entered college. I’d only kissed one other guy and I wasn’t experienced at all. I’d been with two girls, both disasters really. It wasn’t their fault, I just couldn’t really get into them. Anyway, my senior year, near the end of regular season, I was alone in the locker room. Channing came in and he…we had sex. It was my first time with a guy.”

“Seth, I want you to think really hard about it. Did he take advantage of you, at all?”

“I don’t know. I wanted it, wanted him. I’d been so good trying to hide it from everyone and I was ready to have sex.”

“Hey, I get that. I like sex too, and yes, I get a lot of sex with women who think I’m their path to super star athletes, but Channing was your coach. He shouldn’t have touched you.”

Seth picked at the seam on his jeans near his knee, staring at a spot on the ground as he thought about that first time with Channing. “When we were finished, I asked him if he was married. He told me he was divorced. Maybe I should have investigated, but I didn’t.”

“He’s still married, isn’t he?”

“Yeah.”

“Was it only that one time?”

Seth lifted his gaze and shook his head. “Channing was busy. I was only with him a handful of times before I came out here. I found out he was still married and told him to go away.”

“Has he tried to contact you again?”

“Yes. He showed up at a game after I became a starter. I told him it was really over. Of course I’d just met Colby so that took some of the pressure off.”

Justin nodded and kicked off his shoes before curling his legs under his body. He looked comfortable and Seth liked that. If Justin was going to represent him they needed to be comfortable with each other.

“Do you think Channing will try to use your sexuality to blackmail you?”

“What? Why would he do that?”

“I’ve represented a few gay players and they’ve had to deal with it. What would you want to do if he came after you?”

“Tell him to go fuck himself.”

“You slept with a married man. What if he twists it to look like you seduced him?”

“Fuck, could he do that?”

“Seth, I have all evening long to talk about this. It’s only seven fifteen. I think you owe it to yourself to think through all possibilities. I’m here to help you.”

“Do you want a drink?”

“No, just water. I want a clear head to discuss this.”

Seth got up and got some water, placing the glass on the table in front of Justin before taking a seat. “I can’t see him doing that. It would ruin his career.”

“He’s still coaching at Florida, so yes, it would ruin his career.”

After taking a few swigs from his glass, Seth stood and moved to stare out the window. He watched the city below, wondering how many of those people had his problems. Justin moved to stand beside him. He caught Justin’s reflection in the glass and peace filled him. Navigating the complexities of his career freaked him out, but Justin calmed him.

“I want you on my side. Can we talk contracts?”

“Sure, I’ve brought you over something to look at. Anything you don’t understand, please call and talk to Kristen. She’s good at explaining legal language. I’ll make sure Kristen is your main contact for all contract matters. I’ll be checking up with you on a weekly basis, and if Channing contacts you, I need you to send me a text or call right away. I don’t want to let that angle get away from us.”

“So will you really keep my being gay a secret from your staff?”

“Yes. Once you meet Kristen, which will probably be next week since I want her to meet you, you can tell her if you want, but you don’t have to. Eventually, you may decide to come out. If you do, we need to do it the right way.”

“The right way?”

“Yes. Your coaches will need to know before you go public. Before you tell your boyfriend, send me a text so I can check up on you after.”

“Is that necessary?” Seth didn’t know if he really wanted Justin this involved in his life.

“Yes. I can’t help you manage your career if I don’t know everything. When you sign this contract to do the commercial, I’ll make five hundred thousand dollars. That’s a lot of money for almost no work. Trust me, I want to earn my keep. Oh, and speaking of that. Could you give me your parents address? I would like to send your mother flowers and your father some steaks.”

“Is this the treatment you give everyone?”

“Yes and no. I have a few clients who are jerks and though I’ve negotiated contracts for them, we don’t have much interaction because they’ve pushed me away one too many times. I would like to work closely with you. And I would be lying if I said you being gay didn’t make me want to work even closer with you.”

Seth froze. Maybe Justin had misunderstood him, or perhaps there was something else going on.

Justin chuckled and shook his head. “Don’t worry. I’m very straight, but a lot of guys in my law class weren’t. I have friends from every spectrum of the rainbow. I want you to be one kickass football player who will go to the top. That you’re gay makes me want to work harder for you.”

“I’m not sure if I’ll ever want to come out while I’m playing,” Seth said.

“I don’t blame you. Coming out is scary, and I’m here for you, to help you navigate the football world easily, not to get you to come out or stay in the closet.”

“Okay, I like you a lot, Justin. I think we can work well together.”

“Good. Is it okay if I stay a little longer or were you going to head to bed?”

“Um, I was going to relax and watch a movie.”

“I’ll watch with you, if you don’t mind. I find that spending down time with the guys I represent makes it easier for us to have a real relationship where we can talk openly. We just met, and though I may have impressed you, I want you to feel comfortable around me and I want to feel comfortable around you.”

Seth nodded. “Okay, but I want to take off my jeans and pull on some sweats. You okay with that?”

Justin nodded. “Yes, be casual.”

“Okay, I’ll be back in a few.” While he changed into his sweats, he started to freak out that he’d just signed an agent. After tying the drawstring on his pants he opened his bedroom door and hollered. “Did I really just get a five-million-dollar endorsement deal?”

Justin laughed from his kitchen. “Yep, you sure did.”

“Oh my God, are you serious?”

“It will be inked next week. I’ll have Kristen bring the paperwork out to you. You can meet with her and sign. Though I will tell you that she won’t come to your apartment. She never goes anywhere private with any of our male clients. It’s her husband’s rule.”

“Okay, I’ll find a place we can dine without anyone overhearing us.”

“She knows where to make reservations. Leave it up to her. Seriously, she’ll be pissed if you lift a finger.”

Seth stepped into the kitchen and watched as Justin loaded the last of the dishes into the dishwasher. He noticed that Justin had transferred the leftovers to a plastic container.

“You didn’t have to clean up.”