After the Sunset (13 page)

They were married and moved to Winston the following month. Rand was born five months later, and they waited to call and tell people until another four months had passed. No one could make the trip right away, and that was fine with James and May. With the timetable covered, they were free to go on with their lives without anyone knowing the truth, that Rand was not James Holloway’s biological son.

Three years later, Rayland Holloway, finally ready to settle down, finished with the rodeo, and having married a woman he met in Tulsa, was on his way through Winston headed for home. He was bringing his new wife with him to his father’s ranch, a ranch he would take over when Henry Holloway passed, and decided to stop to visit his brother. He was planning to tease May about how one Holloway was, it seemed, just as good as the other. It was a surprise visit, but it turned out that James and May were not the ones in for the shock of their lives.

He had driven down the long drive that led to the main house, and when he and Lily got out, they saw a little boy hanging on the fence. When he turned to them, Rayland almost passed out. May came out on the porch, saw his face, made one of her own, and he knew everything that she had wanted to hide. But James was there, too, and he invited Lily inside for some lemonade. It took Rayland two days to finally get May alone and drag the truth from her. She had told him that James knew and that none of them would ever speak of it.

Rayland wanted his son.

May told him that Rand was James’s son and not his.

“You even named him after me.” Rayland’s voice had cracked wide open.

And she had, to be fair, but that was all in the past.

Rayland said he would divorce Lily and she could divorce James, and they could be married. But May would not do that to a man who was faithful and loving and whom she had come to love more than she even thought possible. As she had placed her hand on her abdomen, telling him that she was pregnant with James’s child, she told him that he should make peace with his life. He and Lily, she was certain, would have beautiful children of their own.

“Can I ask,” I sighed deeply. “What James thought about Rand?”

“No father was ever prouder or loved their son more, Stef,” she told me. “You have to understand, Rand loved James, and James loved both his children fiercely and protectively. He knew Charlotte was the only one who was truly his, but Rand and he were exactly the same. All the values, the love of their family, of the land, their way of life, all of it… they were the same person. James passed on everything to Rand. I look at my son and don’t see Rayland—I see James.”

I swallowed hard. “So what happened between you and Rayland?”

“He went home to his father’s ranch, the White Ash, and nine months after he married Lily, Glenn was born.”

“And after James died?”

“Rayland came to buy the ranch, and Rand told him to go to hell. It was hard, watching them, because Rand was grieving for his father, and Rayland was there, right in front of him, wanting to tell him everything. It was horrible.”

“Rayland says he didn’t want to buy the ranch, just put the two together.”

“When did he tell you this?”

“Tonight.”

“You asked him?” she choked out.

“May, you know me. Of course I asked him.”

“Jesus.”

“But like I said, he says he didn’t want to buy it.”

“Well, all I know is what Rand told me, and Rand said the man wanted to buy it and then sell it, and Rand was not about to ever let that happen.”

“Sounds like they maybe weren’t actually listening to each other.”

“Could be.”

“May?”

“Yes?”

“I know you loved James. I saw you at his funeral. When did you fall in love with him?”

“I loved him for a long time, but after Charlotte was born,” she sighed. “I saw how much he really loved Rand.”

“I don’t understand.”

“Well, for three years, I figured that James was doing the best he could to love Rand, but that when a child of his own came along, that I would see the difference, and I might have to leave him. Rand deserved to be loved completely by a father or not at all.”

“What happened after Charlotte was born?”

“Nothing.”

“You lost me.”

“I mean he didn’t change one bit toward Rand and treated Charlotte the exact way he had when Rand was a baby. James loved his children the same, exactly the same, and loved me like crazy,” she sighed. “And when I realized that James was a man who could love my child from another man as much as his own, I fell hard.”

I smiled into the phone. “You finally let yourself fall in love with your own husband.”

“Oh, yes.”

There was no way I couldn’t ask, I had to know. “Was he happy?”

“James used to say that the blessing of his life was being loved by a good woman and his children. The man loved his family more than anything.”

I knew that. I had seen him with Rand and with Charlotte. He was gruff and hard, a man of very few words, but he never failed to hug them hello and goodbye, and at the end, he had even warmed to me.

“Can I ask why you think that Rayland just doesn’t tell Rand the truth himself if he wants him to know so badly?”

“Because he knows as well as I do that there is no way in hell that Rand would ever believe him. It has to come from me.”

“He’s never tried to blackmail you into it?”

“He has no proof of anything. What’s he going to tell Rand, that they have the same color eyes?” She sighed heavily. “And the only other person Rand would have believed died a long time ago.”

“Rand is his son.”

“Rand is James Holloway’s son. It’s not who creates you, Stef, it’s who raises you. You’ll know what I mean once you and Rand have children. They might be half of you and half of Charlotte, but they will belong to you and Rand.”

My head hurt and so did my heart.
Wouldn’t Rand want his own children once this came out?

“Stefan, honey, you’re going to be a wonderful father and so will Rand. Don’t let any of this put you off your plan. I know you. I know what you’re thinking.”

“I—”

“He wants you, Stefan, and if you think about it, Rand loves his father, and his father’s genes are carried in Charlotte, not him. So really, a child out of you and Charlotte is what he wants. Does that make sense?”

It did, sort of. “God, May, this is a heavy burden to carry all these years.”

“You have no idea.”

“Rayland wants Rand to know.”

“I know he does.”

“I think it’s tearing him up, and he’s striking out, trying to get Rand to see him, to stay in his life, and unfortunately, right now all he’s created is anger and animosity.”

“Yes.”

“Jesus, May, Tyler’s kids, Rayland’s kids, who isn’t messed up?”

“Tyler’s kids are doing fine, and Rand and Charlotte are both fine, thank you.”

“Rand is not going to be fine and neither will Charlotte.”

“Only if you tell my secrets, Stefan, and I would remind you that you have no right to. How people look at Rayland and Rand when they’re together and not see that the son is almost a carbon copy of the father, I do not know. It used to twist my stomach into knots, so I was glad that we only saw them once a year at Christmas. I would see Rand with James and watch Rayland lookin’ at them, and it would make me bawl like a baby.”

“I gotta go,” I said, as my eyes filled. Christ.

“Stefan, no, I want to talk to you about the rodeo.”

“It’s fine, May. I’ll be fine.”

“Not if you die being thrown off a horse.”

“Hopefully that won’t happen.”

“Stefan Joss!”

“Sorry.”

“You need to forget about the grazing rights and get on home. Rand cares more for you, love, than he does about some land.”

“No, I know.” I didn’t tell her that my plan was to go home with Rayland and Glenn. “Thank you for trusting me with the story, May. I love you.”

“Oh honey, I love you too.”

I hung up because she was crying and I was starting and God, what a mess!

Chapter 6

I
HAD
gone down to where the bucking chute was, dressed, as requested, more conservatively. But I was no longer blending. The black jeans and Prada boots, the charcoal gray sweater and sunglasses looked more Hollywood than Dallas.

“Hey.” I smiled at Glenn when I found him.

His eyes ran over me. “What’re you doing here?”

“You asked me to come see you ride.”

“From the stands, asshole.”

“Oh.” I nodded. “Okay.”

But he caught my shoulder when I turned to go, and eased me forward toward the side of the ring.

“You can sit up here, but don’t fall off.”

“I’m actually pretty coordinated,” I assured him.

His eyes were locked on mine.

“Did your father tell you that he’s letting me come home with you guys tomorrow?”

If he was surprised, I never saw it. “No, he didn’t.”

“I can’t wait to see the ranch, Glenn.”

He cleared his throat. “So you should bring your horse around to our trailer tonight after the dance ’cause we’re leavin’ around four in the morning.”

“Okay.”

“You can ride with me.”

“Sounds good. Do you have room for Bella in your truck?”

“Who’s Bella?”

“My dog.”

“You’re bringing your dog too?”

“If that’s okay.”

“Sure,” he said softly, hand on the fence, leaning closer to me. “Bring your dog.”

I noticed the flecks of green in his dark blue eyes. Really, all the Holloway men were just gorgeous creatures. “When we get to your ranch, I’ll show you how well I can ride.”

“I look forward to that,” he said, reaching for me, his fingers sliding across my cheek. “Let me look at your eye.”

I tilted my head so he could see, and he pressed gently at my skin.

“I am gonna kick the shit out of Gil Landry.”

The man had no idea how possessive he sounded. “It’s fine.”

“It’s not,” he said as his fingertips slid down along the edge of my jaw and off me. “All right, get up there and don’t move.”

“Got it.”

He left me then.

“What the fuck was that?”

I turned and found Everett. “Wow.” I smiled wide. “Look at you. The chaps are hot.”

He glared at me. “You cannot consort with the enemy.”

“Take a pill,” I laughed at him. “Oh hey, I need your advice. Should I ride the saddle bronc or ride the horse without a saddle?”

He turned his head to Chris, who had joined us. “Am I still drunk?”

“No, why?”

He looked back at me. “Tell Chris what you just said.”

I put the same question to him that I had asked Everett. He grabbed for the fence.

“Okay.” Everett pressed his lips together, turning to me. “Are you drunk?”

I had to explain fast, over Everett yelling and Chris looking like he was going to be sick, about the provision in the rights agreement.

“You can’t ride saddle bronc or bareback!” Everett yelled at me. “You can’t, Stef, you just can’t. You’ll get thrown off, and you’ll die.”

“I can’t die. I have to go to the White Ash after.”

“I’m sorry, I really am drunk,” Everett deadpanned. “Did you say you were goin’ to the White Ash after the rodeo?”

“Yeah.”

“No.”

“Yeah.”

“Absolutely not,” he laughed at me. “If I have to tie you up and throw you in the back of the trailer with your damn horse, that ain’t happenin’. It’s bad enough we did this without Rand knowing. If we go home and you ain’t with us… might as well dig our graves ourselves.”

“It’s not like that. Rand will be fine.”

“The hell you say! Rand Holloway is gonna string us all up by our balls!”

But I had bigger plans. “He won’t. I’m just going for a visit with his family.”

“Wait, look at me.”

I rolled my eyes.

“What the fuck happened to your eye?”

“Gil Landry punched me.”

His face drained of color.

“Everett,” I chuckled. “Breathe.”

“Are you kidding? Rand will—oh holy shit.”

“I’ll just wear these,” I said, pulling the oversized sunglasses from the top of my head and putting them on. “See, no harm, no foul.”

“He’s gonna fuckin’ kill us,” Chris gagged.

“He can’t actually do that.”

“But he can make me want to kill myself by working me close to death.”

“You’re overreacting.”

“If I was Gil Landry, I would be shitting bricks right about now.”

“Why?”

“’Cause just ’cause you’re a guy, don’t mean that Rand don’t see you as any less than any man here sees his wife. Gil forgot that and took a swing at you. You don’t hit a man’s spouse and walk away. The man should hide.”

“Rand’s not like that.”

His eyebrows lifted. “You ain’t never seen Rand Holloway really, truly angry, but I suspect you will soon.”

“I’ve seen him mad plenty of times.”

“You ain’t never seen him in a fight.”

“No, I haven’t.”

“I have. It’s scary as hell. By the time he’s that mad, somebody’s fixin’ to die.”

“Well, let’s not tell him then.”

“He’ll see the damage, Stef.”

“Not if I’m out at the White Ash.”

He growled at me.